Tragic Turn
by L is a dreamer
Summary: Edward Cullen is brilliant, obsessed with his guitar, and keeps to himself. Their band gives him an outlet for his incredible talent and it seems to be the only thing he cares about - but once she comes to town things start to change.
1. Smells Like Teen Spirit

**Author's Note: Of course, it all belongs to Stephenie Meyer...**

**UPDATE: I've been asked to share the song info for my chapter titles at the beginning of each chapter (in case you want to listen while reading) so I'm adding it in. Any other songs mentioned will go into the endnotes. BTW, you guys all ROCK! Thanks for being the most kickass readers ever!**

**Nirvana - "Smells Like Teen Spirit" **

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Chapter 1 - Smells Like Teen Spirit

There are two things in this world that matter to me. One is the guitar resting against the side of my bed and the other is picking up that guitar and playing it. Everything else just doesn't measure up.

I've been playing for years, the addiction of it becoming like air in my lungs. Without it I'd probably just keel over and die. Although, to be fair, I probably have to give some credit to my brother, Emmett, and his extreme lack of talent. For some reason our parents are fixated on having musical children, and having Emmett come along first probably made their resolve that much stronger. It didn't come naturally so they were always trying to force it on him – first with the piano lessons and then with the guitar under the Christmas tree when he was only eight. With all the stuff we got each year, I remember this moment specifically as the one in which I learned a new emotion: envy.

I wanted nothing more than to touch that guitar, to hear what it sounded like. A sentiment I immediately regretted once Emmett decided he'd try to play. I'd had no experience actually playing music of any kind, but I could tell what bad music was. And if bad music was a business, Emmett would be CEO. But the silver lining came when he finally came to this realization and cast the instrument aside for sports, particularly full contact.

Thankfully he didn't notice when I swiped the guitar from beneath his bed (chalk it up to brotherly competition), and I fell in love. I was seven and knew as my fingers gently strummed each string for the first time that this was something I could be good at, maybe even great. It just felt right.

And for the last ten years I spent every free moment with Opal (yeah, I'm one of _those_ guys): running my hands along her long slender neck, teasing each string with a calloused finger, using her to elicit the kind of sounds that take my breath away. I use her to express my inner most thoughts, fears, desires…

We formed our band the summer before junior year, when Jasper finally became determined to find something better to do on hot damp nights than sweat. I really didn't even plan on being involved at first, but my sister used power of manipulation, something she's become notorious for, to change my mind.

"Why do you only play by yourself? Going through an emo phase?"

"Get lost." I _so_ don't need this tonight. I knew her too well – the slanted expression she wore across her tiny face could only mean she wanted something. And not immediately knowing what it was scared me - it couldn't be good, not a chance. I sighed: "Just tell me what you want, Alice, and then I'll say 'no' and you can leave."

I started to finger a Pearl Jam medley waiting for her to come out with it already. "Today, maybe?" She knows me better than anyone and my impatience grows fastest with her for that very reason.

"I thought I could play with you tonight, maybe." I practically choked on the laughter that exploded from my chest.

"Don't you play the effing flute or something?" I wasn't specifically against playing with others, but this wasn't what I had in mind.

"That was for marching band only and you know it, asshole." Her face radiated fake anger – it was a tactic she used often, particularly for its effectiveness. "I know I'm not up to your incredibly unrealistic expectations, but I'm practically as good at piano as you are and you freaking know it."

And she was right; she's good, but not as good as I am. Honestly, she just lacked the compulsion I had to practice. I loved it; every second was like taking one little step closer to nirvana. _Ah…_I slipped into one of their songs without even realizing it.

"Why the sudden interest? Let me guess –"A small hand flew across my mouth preventing me from finishing the sentence. Which, of course means my prediction was correct; she was doing this for a boy. Why God ever thought to give me a twin sister I'll never know – she's more trouble than she's worth about 90% of the time. Ok, that's a lie, maybe 89% of the time.

Her hand relaxed from my taught lips, curled into a smirk, to rest along Opal's side. She knows I fucking hate when she leaves fingerprints all over my stuff. I eyed her sharply until she removed her hand and used her eyes to plead with me again. "Jasper Hale is forming a band. He's looking for whoever's around, but I heard him tell Rosalie he wanted experience." The concept did pique my interest. I had never really desired to be in a band, especially with the drama it always seemed to cause. Just ask Mötley Crüe, the Sex Pistols, the Beatles…But, Jasper and I were practically friends and he never mentioned the whole band thing to me, which pissed me the fuck off honestly. He was a decent bass player, and we had even gotten together to play once in a while – so why not just ask me to join his stupid band?

My lips stayed firmly pressed together processing everything until Alice used her power of persuasion to push me over the edge: "I'd do it for you, you know." Fuck you, Alice Cullen. I'm a sucker for that one _every _time.

I worked with her for a few hours that night, genuinely providing guidance and critique as necessary. By the end I was actually proud of her and how determined she was to do her best. I guess we have that in common.

Later in the week I even took her over to Jasper's for his scheduled auditions. The town of Forks is microscopic by normal standards so we all pretty much knew everyone in town. It was partially for my own amusement that I volunteered to drive, curious who would be turning up.

What I did not anticipate was who would be sitting at the drum kit when we pulled in front of the garage. I looked over at Alice, her smile gently fading into incredulity, just then her eyes slanted in my direction. We must have had one of those mind-reading twin moments because we stepped out of my silver Volvo simultaneously, staring at the thick hands wrapped around the suddenly-fragile-looking drumsticks.

"You've got to be fucking kidding me." I wasn't sure I had said it out loud until Alice shot me a look in my peripheral vision.

"Um…" she hesitated, "Emmett, why are you here? I mean, what are you doing?" She paused again, not knowing really what the correct question was. "You don't play the drums."

"Au contraire," his voice was confident despite my absolute certainty he wasn't entirely sure what the phrase meant, "I believe I may have been born to play the drums." He banged on a few in succession before slamming a drumstick into the cymbal causing the two of us, Jasper Hale, and the handful of maybe-musically-inclined teenagers from town to cringe.

Honestly, it wasn't as bad as I had expected – it was just LOUD. Alice and I looked at Jasper cautiously, not sure what to make of the whole thing. Emmett could sense our doubt in his abilities and jumped in: "Coach Phillips doesn't trust my ankle since that horrible sprain last year. He pretty much told me I'll be holding down the bench all season. I mean, what the fuck? How do I let out aggression if I don't hit people?"

Of course, the answer was black, shiny, and there right in front of us. He struck the cymbal again for emphasis.

Jasper walked around the equipment, carefully avoiding the cables winding all over the place (a true musician would be doing it unconsciously). "Hey," his hand punched my shoulder as he stood beside me. "Only one drummer showed up." I didn't really bother responding. I mean, if Jasper had said "no" Emmett probably would have went ballistic and Jasper's garage full of brand new equipment would have suffered. And that's a tragedy I just couldn't bear.

"Hi Jasper." Her voice seemed even smaller than normal. I knew this as 'nervous Alice.' "The garage looks great. It's about time someone around here started doing something productive with his afternoons." I was hoping this wasn't some kind of dig at me and my lack of social life lately. Ok, ever. I realized my thoughts were paranoid, bordering on self-absorbed – the mindset of a musician for sure.

"Oh, hey Alice." He smiled at her, a little too wide in my opinion. That protective brotherly thing seemed to kick in when I least expected it.

"I thought I'd come down and audition – you know in case you were looking for someone to play keyboards or something." Her eyes darted around the garage looking for a set of keyboards, or even a piano. And it didn't take a psychic, or even a mind reading twin to see her deflate once she realized neither was present.

Jasper's hand rubbed the back of his neck in an attempt to buy himself a few extra seconds before having to respond to her. "I'm really sorry Alice – but I don't think we're going to be that kind of band. I'm really sorry." I bordered on hating him – I mean I alone knew how hard she'd worked and how much she seemed to want this, but his apology was genuine and I really couldn't fault him that.

She walked over to sit on his amp, something I'd never have allowed at home although Jasper didn't seem to mind. He actually turned away from her to face me: "You here for the audition too?"

"Don't you have enough Cullens fishing for a spot in the band?" I chuckled at the thought of us traveling around from gig to gig in a multicolored bus like the Partridge Family. "Thanks, but no thanks."

"Well these scrubs better be good then." He spoke beneath his breath so the four guys shooting the shit with Emmett wouldn't catch on. Apparently they were all vying to play guitar – _this could get interesting_.

Ironically the first two auditions, random faces I seemed to know from school, both played "Bad, Bad Leroy Brown." I can't even remember the last time I'd heard that song, but damn – hear it twice in a row and you spend the rest of your day humming it, especially the part about being "meaner than a junkyard dog."

Rick Shetler, an irritating junior with a reputation for taking advantage of freshman girls, brought a vintage Gibson, which I thought was pretty sweet – until we realized it was all about image with him. He probably walked around with the beautiful instrument slung across his back, wearing dark jeans and band shirts, trying to broadcast to the world his rock star persona. The only problem is, at some point you have to shit or get off the pot. And for all his efforts, Rick's attempt at "Welcome to the Jungle" pretty much sounded like Emmett back on the day his guitar first showed up. It was punishment for the ears, although, to give the man some credit, he looked somewhat cool doing it. My guess is a lot of practicing in front of the mirror…

While Jasper told the first two he'd call and let them know, he was more upfront with Rick: "Uh, thanks, Rick. You can go now."

Alice smiled as she watched Jasper take the reins. I had known she thought he was "cute" for a few years – especially when Alice and one of her bubbly, giggling friends would be going on and on about every single fucking boy at school during a sleepover. Not that I was listening. But the look in her eyes, maybe it was the twin connection or something, I knew it was more than that. I shook my head trying to erase the thought and turned my attention to Tyler Crowly ready to play, despite asking to borrow Jasper's guitar. I saw that as having two strikes against him already, but Jasper always was more tolerant than I am.

However, I am a man who can admit when I'm wrong. And once Tyler started to play, I was most definitely wrong. The man could _play_. His version of "Purple Haze" wouldn't have passed for the real thing, but impressed me. And I'm not easily impressed. With this realization I felt a tightness in my chest – what could you even call this feeling? My mind started racing and I think an anxiety attack was beginning to set in as I saw Jasper rise to shake Tyler's hand – well fuck, there they go. They've got themselves a band.

So what did I care? Not one thing in my life changed besides the odd mental image of Emmett as a drummer – and trust me, I use the term loosely. But even realizing that my life would stay exactly the same didn't ease that tight feeling working its way from my chest up into my throat. I was starting to freak myself out – what the fuck was going on? I walked out into the street, leaning my back against the passenger side of my car. Taking deep breaths in the still night I tried to calm myself down when the sound of a voice startled me.

"Whoa, what happened to you?" Jasper was never delicate with anything on his mind.

"Nothing… I don't know." I almost wish I smoked so I could take a long, deep drag and let it out slowly just for an excuse to stay silent. When I worked up the nerve to make eye contact I could tell he wasn't buying it. There was almost a hint of annoyance in his expression that made me totally lose it –

"What the fuck, Jasper? I mean Crowley was decent and all, but come on." I didn't expect to sound as furious as I did, but the tightness started to dissipate so I continued, "Why didn't you fucking ask me? Instead you put up flyers and set up this embarrassment of an audition." I knew I was glaring, but didn't care.

"Cullen, you're ridiculous. You know if I had asked you you would have laughed in my face."

"Yeah, probably." It was true; I couldn't put up too much of a fight.

"What if I ask you now? You saying you'd do it?"

I had to think that one through, but just as my mental wheels started to turn what was left of that tight feeling climbed up my throat, forcing my head into a sideways nod. I guess thinking it over wasn't an option.

Thankfully Jasper wasn't the kind to make a big deal out of things. He stuck out his hand and I casually shook it, knocking my shoulder into him to display an enthusiasm I didn't know I'd had until that minute. Apparently something deep inside liked the idea of being in a band.

Crowley was gone by the time I went back into the garage to see Emmett trying to twirl a drumstick between his fingers, Jasper adjusting his amp, and Alice sitting on the beat up futon with a shit eating grin on her face. "What?"

"Nothing." Although her "nothing" couldn't have sounded more like something.

I took a deep breath, _so_ not in the mood for games. Looking back at her caused her to break down into hysterics. Before I could question her she gripped Jasper's arm to steady herself, "See Jasper, I told you. The only way to get him was to bruise his ego." Fuck you Alice, fuck you.

Jasper didn't move a muscle, looking over his shoulder towards me with a half smile. God I hate that they were both in on something to manipulate me. And I hate worse that it fucking worked. I'm so goddamn predictable.

"Alice, for someone so tiny you're pretty horrible at times." I left it at that. I was starting to get into the idea of a band, and going off on a tirade would make it that much harder to come crawling back. Plus I had seen the local "talent" and forming my own band was out of the question.

"Fuck you all." There I'd said it, we can move on.

"What'd I do?" Emmett must have transitioned back into reality. Apparently he hadn't been in on their plan, but apologizing wasn't really my style.

"I owed you that one from yesterday, fucker." He seemed to accept that.

I quickly went out to my car to get Opal and plugged her into the spare amp. "Alright, let's go then." Technically it was Jasper's band, but technically I didn't care. I started up with "Smells Like Teen Spirit" and the three of us played until it started to sound like we were actually playing the same song.

Alice was furiously writing in a lined notebook, glancing back and forth between each of us and the white pages.

Jasper watched what she did while he played, it was so fucking obvious. "What are you doing over there?"

Her face lit up, just a bit. If I'd had blinked I would have missed it. "Writing a few notes. You guys seriously need a stylist." None of us answered her; Emmett and I knew from experience it was best to just let her carry on. Challenge her and beware the wrath of Alice – trust me, _so_ not worth it.

I played a few chords and made us do the song again – practice makes perfect and I expect perfection.

Before going home that night we spent a good two hours debating band names at Alice's insistence. She was concerned that she couldn't work on logos and/or bumper stickers until we had decided on something. Emmett kept suggesting the stupidest shit – his best idea thus far being "Aggressive Bastards." Jasper and Alice made several, but they just weren't right. I was starting to get attached to my suggestion: "Shadow Brigade." But Jasper said it made him think of Batman and submitted a big, fat veto.

"Don't give me trouble, Hale. That was a good suggestion you just shot down. Speaking of which, you ever, _ever_ pull a stunt like tonight's on me again and what follows will take a tragic turn."

Everyone paused for more than a moment.

"Cullen, you're a fucking genius."

It didn't matter what I thought about the name since Alice ran out of the garage at warp speed, probably already home making the first Tragic Turn t-shirt.

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**Other Songs Mentioned: **

**Jim Croce - "Bad, Bad Leroy Brown"**

**Jimi Hendrix - "Purple Haze" **

**Author's Note: Thanks for reading the intro to my first fan fiction in a long, long time. Stick with it and I promise to make it worth your while.**

**L.**


	2. Black Magic Woman

**Author's Note: Of course, it all belongs to Stephenie Meyer...**

**Santana - "Black Magic Woman" **

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Chapter 2 – Black Magic Woman

In the last few months things have really changed – and in my expert opinion getting this band together was actually a pretty good idea. I've had my mind set on telling Jasper one of these days, just haven't gotten around to it yet…

During the school year we practice on Wednesday and Friday nights as a set schedule and then any other time we feel like it. The more we played together the more we all seemed to gel and the easier it was to want to meet up in the Hales' garage after long days at school. And to be fair it wasn't really like practice, but a way of life. Everything we cared about seemed to be in that garage so logically that's where we belonged.

It was in that garage that Emmett started to shed his meathead image as he progressed with the drum set. He actually listened when Jasper and I instructed him and grew to become a really talented drummer in a very short time. I didn't think my parents respected the drums as a real instrument until they heard Emmett had become so enthusiastic about them. And they pretty much flipped a fucking shit once they found out that the musical thing hadn't skipped him entirely.

And once he let his guard down and started acting like a real person (in stark comparison to the dickhead he was about 97% of the time before), I kind of started to respect him. Alice, on the other hand, had always really looked up to him. I didn't get it. He was big and she was small – I assumed that was at the root of things – but otherwise I wasn't sure what the big deal was. Maybe women are just better at seeing into people, because Jasper's sister Rosalie started hanging around Emmett at our practices more and more until they became an item. I'm assuming that's what they were, although they never seemed to label things, when I saw his hands up her shirt after practice one night. None of us were really surprised though, by that time she had already become just another accepted part of the group.

We had all known each other throughout school, and, despite being a year older than us, Rosalie and Alice would frequently hang out. In all the years of giggling and fucking teenybopper crushes behind Alice's closed door she never so much as blinked in Emmett's direction. I had to give the man credit; Rosalie was definitely a good start and he was definitely changing his image for the better.

Not to out myself as a pervert or anything, but I remember thanking the heavens every time Rosalie Hale would grace the Cullen household with her presence. Really, I didn't know a thing about her as a person, but as the only non-relative girl who spent any real time in our house she quickly became my childhood obsession. Mostly it was just this glow around her and the golden streaks in her hair. In my house we are so completely genetically boring it's ridiculous – varying shades of brown hair and brown eyes with the exception of my dad. Rosalie's golden hair and blue eyes just captivated me.

Thankfully I've moved on in recent years to prevent myself from following her around like a lost puppy. I've never wanted to be like that. In fact, I hate those poor bastards at school in it so deep they're practically drooling as they walk along behind the unsuspecting girl du jour. I'm pretty sure my Rosalie obsession faded the more I practiced my guitar. And as Opal moved into my sights, I guess Rosalie got wedged out. Sometimes when I see her though, I get a little flash of those feelings… and sometimes still I catch myself smiling.

But I know I'm over it when I find myself being genuinely happy for Emmett. Here he goes from asshole jock to desirable musician in mere months. And according to our mom Rosalie has worked wonders on him. Other senior girls all seem to think she's a frigid bitch, or at least that's what the whispers in the hall tell me, but with Emmett she's thoughtful and affectionate. I'm guessing my mom's idea of working wonders is exactly what would get Emmett labeled as a pussy if it got out; buying stuffed animals, wearing only the clothes Rosalie pre-approves, and eating dinner minus bodily functions.

Alice, in the meantime, has been clinging to Jasper like wet underwear under the guise of "Band Manager." Jasper, learning quickly not to refute her once she's made up her mind, didn't protest her self appointment and has let her boss the lot of us around for months. I'd never say it out loud, but I kind of think Jasper liked it. As many perks as having a twin sister seemed to have at times, it fucking sucked when she was into a guy. Especially one I spend so much time with. The sexual tension seemed to build every day, yet, thankfully, things seemed to stay on the friendly side of the fence. I knew at some point they'd end up together, it was painfully obvious, but in the meantime it was this little game they seemed to play.

Despite labeling herself our manager, no one really expected Alice to step into any kind of significant role. She proved us all wrong and really earned her stripes this time though – somehow she talked the notoriously grumpy owner of The Red Apple, a coffee shop in town, to let us play on Saturday.

She told us at Wednesday's practice excitedly jumping into Jasper's arms for a hug before the words were even out of her mouth. I diverted my eyes in time to see Emmett pulling Rosalie into his lap and shoving his tongue down her throat. I was just as fucking excited as everyone else, but being the fifth wheel fucking sucks sometimes… instead I picked up Opal and started to strum in part to release some energy and partially to remind everyone I was still fucking here.

We had played a few small gigs around town, but mostly for places with older crowds that seemed to cast aside our playing as "noise." The Red Apple would be the first place where people our age actually hung out, a detail of critical importance in my book. So our set list was even more important than usual. Jasper and I worked on it all night Thursday until we were satisfied, but I was sure something was missing.

On Friday, after school I went directly over to the Apple – we had given ourselves a "mental health day" to prep for tomorrow and this was my usual routine for any night we weren't practicing. I ordered a cup of black coffee, the only thing I ever ordered, and wondered why the woman behind the counter, the only person seemed to work there, couldn't remember that. Not that I'm narcissistic enough to think I warrant specific remembering, but still…I pulled out my tattered copy of _Slaughterhouse-Five_ trying not to think about playing tomorrow night. I'm a pretty confident motherfucker but Alice is always the first one to say it, and it's true, I can work myself up into obsessing over anything.

I read for about an hour drinking cup after cup of black coffee. The caffeine must have started to really kick-in since I found myself looking up at the door each time it opened, ringing a tiny bell dangling above it. I immediately looked back to the words on the page to continue reading but started to wonder after the tenth or eleventh time I went through this ritual if this was what being in the witness protection program felt like – compulsive paranoia, always looking over your shoulder.

I kept my head down fighting the desire to look up the next few times the bell rang. My inner dialogue wouldn't shut up though, seeming to read me the riot act: _You think _this_ makes you normal? You're pretending to read so you don't look up at the door. You are sick my friend, sick, sick sick…_

My thoughts were interrupted as a wafting scent came past me. I took it in completely and felt my eyes close. I didn't know if it was perfume, or shampoo, or what, but it was divine and I wanted more of it. The owner of the delicious scent was long past me causing the bell to ring again as she walked out through the front door into the chilled air of the darkened night. I followed her profile through the glass as she walked past the window, memorizing her, before sprinting through the door. Outside I took a deep breath, once again catching a hint of the scent again before it was gone. I turned to look for her, but it was too late, she was gone too.

***

Saturday evening we met at Jasper's ready to pack up his SUV with all our stuff. Emmett's oversized Jeep could have easily housed his drums, but instead he and Rosalie opted to meet us there. I guess I knew where Alice got her stubbornness from because he was just as bad, if not worse. Rather than fight him we shoved his shit into the back of the Explorer and got into our respective vehicles deciding to meet at the Apple.

Alice rode with Jasper and I took my Volvo, glancing in the back seat to be sure Opal was there, and for the first time in a really long time I felt alone.

I drove fast. I always drive fast, but this was fast even for me – feeling the loneliness dissipate the faster I went. Instead of blocking out the sights and sounds as the world whizzed past me, I took it all in. I could hear the drizzling rain hitting the windshield like darts, the growl of the engine as I willed it onward, and the rhythmic beat of "Black Magic Woman" coming from my car's exceptional sound system. In fact, it was all downright hypnotizing.

I pulled a quick right onto a stretch of road that would allow me to continue at my current speed without the threat of lights or lurking policemen. I felt the bass thumping, its waves washing over me, forcing the pedal onto the floor and feeling the car lurch forward, well over 100 miles per hour. I would have never dreamt of slowing down, but an old red truck on the side of the road caught my attention. Leaning up against it was a small framed girl with oddly familiar features and a head of dark shiny hair partially covered by the hood of a navy blue hooded sweatshirt.

Without realizing it I had pulled the Volvo in front of her and gotten out, the rain soaking me in seconds. Her glance in my direction was obviously wary.

"Are you some kind of psycho killer or something? Because if you are I feel obligated to warn you that I've got pepper spray and 911 on speed dial." I smiled crookedly at her candid attempt to take control of the situation.

"Um, no. No, I'm not a psycho killer or anything," I caught an intoxicating scent wafting through the air forcing me to pause a moment too long for that part of the sentence, "I just thought you could use a hand."

She eyed me cautiously again and let herself smile a half smile that didn't completely indicate how sincere it might be. I decided to start small. "I'm Edward Cullen and I just want to help you fix your car, okay?" She came forward to meet me and stuck her hand out like she was on a job interview or something.

"Bella, Bella Swan." She spoke slowly and purposefully, immediately giving off the impression of an old soul. "Thanks for stopping. I don't know what's wrong with it – other than old age. It just stopped running." She took a step closer and that deliciously floral smell ran through me again, stronger this time. I couldn't help the shiver that went up my spine and I didn't know if it was her or the cold rain that had been soaking my grey t-shirt.

I lifted the truck's hood and she offered me a flashlight without having to ask for one. I smiled thinking it was as if she had read my mind. After toying with a few things, I asked her to try the ignition and she turned the key as I held my breath, feeling frigid raindrops running down my back. It started right up and she bounced out of the car throwing her arms around my neck. I'm pretty sure she was excitedly thanking me, but that smell – whatever it was – seemed to take over my mind. I took another breath before she backed away, looking embarrassed for her sudden outburst of touchy-feely behavior.

"Um, sorry about that." She bit her lower lip. "I can't believe you fixed it. Thanks again." She smiled and I knew she meant it this time.

"You're welcome Miss Swan," I always loved when guys in movies could be gentlemanly and shit, but I didn't plan to do it – especially not now, in front of her. It was my turn to look a little embarrassed.

"Bella's fine. You can just call me that." She looked so damn cute with the rain soaking her long dark strands of hair, I couldn't stop staring. The little rock star in me kept prompting me to say something to her, but I just couldn't. She started to shift uncomfortably when I just blurted it out.

"You know my band is playing at the Apple tonight. That's actually where I'm headed." The minute I said it I wondered what part of me would presume she'd care one iota about where the fuck I'm headed.

She smiled and looked away. "Cool."

I went into recovery mode, so I didn't sound like a total freak, "You should stop by."

She turned to get into the ancient red truck, opening the door and glancing over her left shoulder, "Maybe." She smiled again and slammed the door. Maybe it was my imagination, but as the door slammed shut I swore I could smell that heavenly scent again.

***

Jasper looked slightly pissed when I finally showed up, but I felt light and happy and even I was surprised. I rubbed the top of Alice's head as I walked past her with Opal tucked under one arm and she stood agape with the words "What the fuck happened to you?" threatening to spill forth at any moment.

I immediately started helping to set things up and I could tell Jasper's primary reason for being pissed was Emmett and Rosalie's makeout session against the brick wall behind us. He never packed up the equipment, or carried it, or set it up. Ever. And I knew each time it seemed to bother Jasper more. But to be fair, Emmett was always like this and has never really had to take responsibility for anything. When he played football or lacrosse there was always someone there gathering equipment and dirty uniforms ready to give the players a pat on the back after each game. To him, _that_ was the real world and he wasn't used to living in this one just yet.

"Forget it," I said to Jasper with a light punch on the shoulder. "He's a lost cause." It was unlike me to gloss over Emmett's shortcomings, with a smile nonetheless, but things just didn't seem to bother me tonight. I closed my eyes as I screwed together the microphone stand thinking of the smell that drove me wild, mixed with the cool freshness of the rain – it was intoxicating. I opened my eyes to see four pairs of eyes staring in my direction.

I stared back grasping for words. "Fuck off." I meant it, but couldn't help saying it with a smile.

We started the show at 8:30 and things went surprisingly well. My only complaint was Emmett's occasional missed beat. I was able to figure it out after a few songs; whenever Rosalie bent forward to get something out of her bag she exposed just enough cleavage to distract my poor, primal brother. I made a mental note to give him a hard time about that one later.

We went through the set list as planned, but something about it was still bothering me. Jasper and I alternated singing depending on the song and a few were just instrumentals allowing us to jam freely without the added pressure of remembering lyrics and worrying about sounding decent. The crowd was filled with mostly kids from our school and maybe a dozen or so people I didn't recognize. I kept scanning the faces of the crowd, telling myself it didn't have to do with her but instead was more about remembering the moment. Who the fuck was I kidding, it was _so_ about her.

I know it because the second she came in my eyes went right to her. She didn't look up at the platform where we were immediately and the longing for her to look in my direction was unbearable. The current song was starting to wrap up, our second-to-last song tradition of singing The Clash's "Should I Stay or Should I Go," and before we could go into the next one, I pulled Jasper aside.

"Don't fucking hate me man, but I need to make a change."

"Now? Edward, fuck, we're in the middle of something here you know." I could see his eyes darting around anxiously.

I motioned to Emmett, who was looking impatient but generally unconcerned, not to worry.

"Shit, I'm really sorry Jasper, but instead of the closer we picked, can we do something else? I fucking can't explain it, and to be honest if I try it won't make any sense, but just do this for me, okay?"

He nodded and we shouted to Emmett that he was done for the night – we hadn't practiced the song I wanted to play, but I knew Jasper knew it. He was fucking cool like that, Jasper was. He trusted me and knew that this band was everything to me. I'd never do anything to fuck things up for us.

While the conversation seemed to take minutes, in reality it was mere seconds and Bella was still ordering coffee. It was infuriating to know she was in the room and not have that scent filling me, taking over me.

I started the song with my eyes glued to her, remembering the feeling of racing down the road just hours before, the adrenaline of danger and the unknown ahead, the rhythm and bass pounding. I started to play and felt the song with every fiber of my being; it was the only thing that seemed right to play.

"I got a Black Magic Woman…" I let my fingers run over Opal quickly and effortlessly. I had practiced the song before, always looking to conquer a challenge, but had never played it like this. I put every ounce of energy from deep in my soul into the song, into feeling it, into projecting it, into willing her eyes to mine. I could see her head turning towards me and our eyes locked just as I got to my favorite line, "But she's a Black Magic Woman and she's trying to make a devil out of me…"

The liquid chocolate of her eyes radiated across the room and I sang like she was the only one there. I confidently fingered the big solo and just wanted it to sound perfect, even if she'd never know I was only playing it for her.

We ended on a high note and actually received an energetic applause from the crowd. It was unexpected and Emmett beamed as he waved himself off the stage. I could see Jasper hold up one hand in my peripheral vision and smile at Alice as he, too, walked off. I took Opal from around my torso and laid her back against the drums before looking back to where Bella had been standing. There was a void where she had been and my eyes scanned through faces for her frantically. I must have been looking oddly manic because next thing I knew Jasper came up behind me and gave a breathy "goodnight" into the microphone.

I quickly pushed through the crowd to where she was and stopped to reassess – she had to be there someplace. But it seemed that once again she was gone and all that was left was a hint of sweetness in the air.

* * *

**Other Songs Mentioned: **

**The Clash - "Should I Stay or Should I Go"**

**Author's Note: Thanks for all of the initial support. Please review, I'd love to hear what you have to say. **

**L.**

**P.S. - I _totally_ know what scent Bella is wearing that makes Edward absolutely crazy... anyone think it would help to know what it is?**


	3. Fool in the Rain

**Author's Note: Thanks for all of the support so far. I worked really hard on this Chapter – hopefully you'll all love it so much you'll want to spread the word!**

**BIG thanks to larin20 for the awesome recommendation! Her story, Treading Water, is different from anything else I've read and involves the image of sexy, deputy Edward – can't go wrong! Definitely check it out!**

**Of course, it all belongs to Stephenie Meyer...**

**Led Zeppelin - "Fool in the Rain"**

* * *

Chapter 3 – Fool in the Rain

My flight got in on Thursday night, but mercifully I wasn't required to start school until Monday. It was tough enough being thrown into a whole new life without being the new freak on a Friday. By Monday the rumors would be flying and I'd be dead in the water before I could even reach for a paddle.

I'm a creature of habit to say the least – my mom kind of conditioned me that way. After she and my dad split up they tried sending me back and forth between her house in Phoenix and my dad's in Washington, but it didn't work out. I was like a potted houseplant in that way; take me away from my spot on the windowsill and I just refused to flourish. I question whether I refused or whether the wet, chilly vacations spent in Forks just didn't agree with me.

At some point my visits stopped entirely and my life became simple, easy really. Until mom and Phil got involved and suddenly there was another whole person to factor into every decision we made as a family. My mother, being how she is, would try to simultaneously accommodate everything both Phil and I needed, but I could see the consequences of that one easily – she always came last. It wasn't fair to her or to me.

The day I figured that out was the day I knew what had to be done. I called Charlie and asked if my old bedroom was still available. I knew he'd never refuse me an opportunity to visit, but was afraid the idea of me living there full time might be overwhelming.

He was silent on the phone for longer than I expected after the words left my mouth.

"Charlie? You still there?" I bit my lip, starting to consider the possibility he might actually say no.

"Wha – uh yeah, Bells. Still here." His voice was unusual, especially for Charlie. He was notorious for keeping an even keel no matter what.

"You okay?"

This time I thought I heard his voice break slightly as he responded: "I just never thought I'd hear you ask to come live here with me. You can always come home." He emphasized the "always" but what I heard was the "home." Hearing him say it out loud seemed to make it real; Forks would be my new home.

* * *

The house was exactly the same as the last time I visited. It was partially sad and partially reassuring to see it that way; everything was familiar in a very unfamiliar way. I quickly noticed that I didn't know where everything was in the kitchen cabinets or what the shower schedule was like – and Charlie didn't know what to expect either, so in that respect I chose to view my change as embarking on an adventure.

When Charlie gave me the old Chevy truck on my first night I tried to tell myself it was good karma. I did the right thing for my mom while making Charlie happy – if that didn't up my karma points I don't know what would… but I couldn't shake the feeling of guilt only a daughter feels when she's being given something she knows she doesn't entirely deserve. I had stopped visiting the man for Christ's sake and now he was giving me a _car_.

Considering his inexperience at actually having to parent me, Charlie was pretty damn good – he was able to convince me that taking the truck would really be doing him a favor.

"I mean I work so much, I really couldn't just drop everything to chauffer you around. And just think of the sleepless night's I'd experience if I thought you were trying to walk the deserted backstreets around here." He furrowed his brow and eyed me directly, "It would really help me out if you'd just take the truck, okay?"

I smiled and realized I'd have to give him a little more credit going forward. He dropped the keys into my empty hand. Tomorrow, while the rest of the town had places to go and things to do, I would be exploring a new beginning.

I had been tempted to set an alarm to get going early, but I remembered my self-imposed "no agenda" rule and turned the thing back off. I'd be getting up ridiculously early for school every weekday, today I could give myself a break.

It was surprising how quickly I adapted to my new surroundings, with one exception. Without the sun shining slantedly through my window blinds I didn't get out of bed until almost noon. How do people here figure out the time of day? I know, I know…with a fucking clock you idiot…but still. I always equated slanted sun from one direction with waking up, bright overhead sun with midday, and sun slanted from the other side as the beginning of nighttime. Forks, in that respect, would take some getting used to.

About seven minutes into my exploration I realized something critically important – Forks was small. I mean, I knew it was small and I had been here before but things were even smaller than I expected. I drove past school so I'd be able to find it without a problem on Monday and past the local diner, immediately followed by the local gas station. I glanced down at the fuel gauge actually hoping I'd need to stop to kill an extra four or five minutes, but Charlie had filled the tank for me.

I found a road I hadn't remembered with the promise of looking "scenic" as old people say in movies. In fact, it was a lot like driving through a green tunnel but instead of being dark it was alive, misty, and swaying around me. The road came to a fork and the cheesy part of me smiled thinking of the irony. I mentally tossed a coin before decided to head to the left.

The road seemed to disappear between the dense trees and fern filled underbrush. It honestly was beautiful to look at. I didn't know where I was headed or what was up ahead, but damn it I was prepared for an adventure and I was going to make it happen one way or another.

That is until the orange sign began to emerge from the fog in front of me. I slowed up until it came into focus: "Road Closed."

"Now if that isn't an effing metaphor, I don't know what is…" I was startled to hear my own voice out loud. Talking to myself wasn't such a good sign either.

It took about twelve maneuvers to get the truck turned around in the narrow space and the entire time I mentally begged for no one to venture along this same path and catch me at it. My guess is if choosing to take this side of the road didn't label me an outsider, this less-than-stellar driving moment might do it.

After having seen nothing and pretty much done nothing I headed back towards the direction of home. Maybe my attempt at optimism was all wrong, maybe my time in Forks would end up just like this adventure…a total disappointment.

Karma is such a whore.

The moment my negative thoughts happened, my truck decided to die. And not die like running out of gas, slowly fading to a standstill… a violent abrupt death forcing my body to lurch forward. Despite the otherwise ancient nature of the truck, it did have seatbelts and my mom had brainwashed me early on to use them. Otherwise, I'm pretty sure my father would have been called to the scene to identify my brain from the side of the road.

The image made me wince. I'm a big talker, but my body can't handle the kind of things I think half the time. This has led to a lot of fainting and even more embarrassment. At least no one here knew it. Maybe if I could keep myself under control they'd never have to. Maybe starting fresh wouldn't be so bad.

I pulled out my cell and realized I didn't even know anyone to call besides my dad and I'm sure he'd be thrilled to come rescue me during a shift on my first full day in town. Turns out it didn't matter – I'd strayed far enough from the local attempt at civilization that there didn't seem to be service anyway. Not even one bar. _Great_.

My mind usually raced through possible solutions whenever I've been in problematic situations before, but now it was silent. Annoyingly silent actually. I guess I'm lucky it wasn't snowing or something - I'd end up out here like Jack Nicholson at the end of _The Shining_ just a creepy human popsicle.

The gruesome train of thought wasn't helping and suddenly every horror movie I'd ever seen was playing through my mind. Half of them had scenes of young, stupid girls (_stupid, stupid!_) stranded in the woods somehow. And very rarely did those girls make to the end of the movie. Usually some guy tried to help her and the twist was that he was really the killer… yeah, that was the formula all right.

Just as the thought came to me a growling sound from behind me grabbed my attention. That would be the part of the movie where the audience leaps to their feet and shouts, "No! NO! Stay in the car!" But of course, I don't (_stupid, stupid!_). I get out and lean against the driver's side door to see what the noise was and if it could possibly indicate help in some way. The silver car approaching was flying. Seeing it emerge as a speck in the distance was startling as it closed the distance between us in microseconds. I could hear a faint thump of bass, but not the rappy kind of stuff we'd see coming from pimped out cars in the city, this was slower and familiar – I just couldn't place it.

My hair whirled around my face in the gust of wind the silver car made when it passed me, but before I could push the messy strands from my face I heard the car stop and slowly reverse back towards me. It pulled to the side of the road just in front of me and I'm pretty sure my heart stopped. Images of Leatherface and Jason started to run through my head, but I cracked a half smile at my own absurdity – like Leatherface would show up in a shiny silver Volvo to kill me. The sound of my own chuckle actually helped to alleviate some of the tension growing in my chest.

Seeing him as he got out of the car helped too. He was young, seventeen at the most. Odds are he wasn't out for blood. Still, you could never be too sure…

"Are you some kind of psycho killer or something? Because if you are I feel obligated to warn you that I've got pepper spray and 911 on speed dial." He didn't need to know that there was no cell service or that I'd never actually even looked at the bottle of pepper spray. My father did give it to me last night and I'd thrown it, still in plastic wrap, into the glove compartment. A lot of good that would do me if this guy decided to pounce on me. I looked up at him and saw a wide, crooked smile on his face. It wasn't cocky the way I'd imagine a Patrick Bateman-like psycho to be, but seemed to be amused by my overt paranoia. I could handle amusement if it meant getting some help.

The wind caught my hair again as he answered, "Um, no. No, I'm not a psycho killer or anything." He paused, taking a deep breath. "I just thought you could use a hand."

Watching the raindrops soak through his t-shirt, my eyes moved up his strong chest to his face, surprised by how incredibly handsome he was. He wasn't bothered by the heavy rain pelting his hair and face – rather he seemed more concerned with helping me. I could tell the thought changed my expression from one of caution to one of acceptance which quickly became a smile once I caught his eyes with mine again.

"I'm Edward Cullen and I just want to help you fix your car, okay?" He was cautious and I could tell he just didn't want to scare me.

I felt like I was staring, but I couldn't process the scenario as it had suddenly unfolded. I'm not the kind of person with good luck like this. Something more my speed would be getting assisted by a senior citizen. Mind-numblingly handsome guys just didn't stop cars to help me. But I guess mind-numblingly handsome guys in Forks didn't know that yet.

I stepped a few paces forward feeling the water beneath me soak into my jeans, the cold traveling quickly up each pant leg. I knew what a normal girl would do in this situation; probably throw a sexy look over her shoulder and introduce herself with pouty lips and seductive voice. Instead, what Bella Swan did was this: I extended my hand, my whole arm really, and approached him with it from about four paces away. I'm lucky he didn't turn and run right there…He shook my hand and honestly, all I wanted to do was lift up that same hand and smack myself across the face with it.

"Bella, Bella Swan." Who the fuck do I think I am, James Bond or something? To avoid a continuation of my constant embarrassment I slowed down my speech hoping to insert some kind of filter. "Thanks for stopping. I don't know what's wrong with it – other than old age. It just stopped running." I took another step forward in an attempt to demonstrate confidence.

I watched him expertly pop the hood – thank god he knew where the release lever was! It was like this truck and I were on a first date and we hadn't gotten to that part of the conversation just yet…I started watching his hands work, but not really because I was interested in what he was doing. I figured if he was unable to fix the problem I wouldn't be any worse off than I was now anyway. His hands were strong and had character. Granted, until I saw them I never really thought about hands as having character, but it was something I definitely recognized when I saw it.

The rain started to suddenly become apparent. Probably because I was visually tracking a drop from a lock of his hair across his jaw line, and down his neck before disappearing into his already saturated shirt. It clung to him as he worked and I suddenly felt like a frat guy on spring break ogling the goods during a wet t-shirt contest. Another perfect example of my own thoughts embarrassing me…

From my angle it looked too dark to see anything, not that I knew what I'd be looking at anyway – but I fished out a flashlight and handed it over. His smile was unexpected, but appreciated as it spread a warm feeling across my body. I was almost able to forget I was soaked to the bone until I remembered that Edward, too was soaked. And he was doing it for _me_. And somehow the thought brought my eyes back to his strong back and shoulders where they stayed.

I snapped back into reality once I heard his voice asking me to try the ignition. I hopped into the cab and turned it. Apparently the boy knew what he was doing because my cranky bitch of a truck sprang to life like it had been napping and we'd disturbed it. I made a mental note to show this thing who's boss one day.

The whole situation was surreal – standing out in the pouring rain, in an unfamiliar place, with an unbelievably sexy guy fingering my carburetor (or whatever it was he actually did), ultimately saving my day. In fact, it felt so much like a dream, a fantasy really, that I couldn't feel my hold on reality slipping until I had launched myself into his arms. My arms wound around his neck, feeling the cold wetness of his shirt mixed with the heat of his very-much-not-a-dream body brought me back to earth, stepping away quickly despite that little voice urging me to never let go. I tried to shush it; _Relax, Bella. It's only day one. Don't embarrass yourself beyond what you can handle on the very first day_.

I allowed myself to meet his gaze. Since acknowledging that no one here was aware of my normal modus operandi, they didn't have to know. Maybe if I acted confident, they'd see me that way too. Ok, maybe _he'd_ see me that way. I told myself I wouldn't be the first one to look away, but after maybe only a second or two it was apparent I'd need practice with my confidence. Especially the "fake it till you make it" kind. Edward didn't seem to care that a stranger had practically assaulted him in the rain after his completion of a good deed. He didn't seem too concerned with anything – my attention of course shifted back to the rain, back to his arms, across his… _Stop it you fool, he knows you're staring…_

"Um, sorry about that." I couldn't help practically chewing off my bottom lip in an attempt to regain my composure. "I can't believe you fixed it. Thanks again." I was beginning to instruct myself to smile, it would be the polite thing to do, when I realized I was already doing it. If realization was the theme of the morning, I'd just had another one. Maybe if I stopped worrying so much about every word, every action, every faux pas I could actually have some fun once in a while. And looking at Edward reminded me that I most definitely wanted to have some fun. I'm pretty sure I blushed at my own thoughts and smiled a bit wider, thankful that he wasn't a mind reader.

His lips parted (_Oh my god, was I staring at his lips?_), ready to speak. "You're welcome Miss Swan." God he looked cute saying that, gentlemanly. And the light flushing across his embarrassed cheeks made it that much harder not to stare.

I let out a deep breath of relief knowing I wasn't the only one with the occasional verbal misstep. Someone who dealt with it too could understand.

"Bella's fine. You can just call me that."

I don't know what I was expecting, but it certainly wasn't silence. Whenever silence could possibly be expected I'm the kind of OCD freak that mentally prepares a list of icebreaking topics. _Cosmo_'s prepared list usually had a few suggestions, but this month's "Every year, 11,000 Americans injure themselves while trying out bizarre sexual positions" might frighten him at this point. And even if I was able to get the words out without dying of humiliation, I was worried my vivid imagination would suddenly be filled with images of Edward and bizarre sexual positions. Too late…

My mental ramblings, laced with fantasy, weren't helping the rapidly expanding moment of silence and my insecurities really took hold of me. I started wiping under my eyes, curious if his staring was related to the dark circles of running mascara sure to be painting my face.

Wait a minute, he's _staring_? At _me_? I indulged myself long enough to imagine maybe he was thinking something positive. The moment was shorter than short.

Finally, he broke the silence with the thought that must have been keeping him preoccupied. "You know my band is playing at the Apple tonight. That's actually where I'm headed."

_Fuck me_.

No, not like that. Well, ok maybe..._no!_ He was late and had someplace to be. He wasn't thinking about how sexy it was to be helping a mysterious damsel in distress, he was wondering why he stopped at all, probably counting the minutes until he could continue on with his very important sounding day. No reason to keep him any longer than was necessary.

"Cool." _Please jut get in your car and go, and I promise to never bother you again_.

"You should stop by." It killed me that on top of everything, he was polite enough to throw a pity invite my way. I was pretty sure the last thing he wanted was a mess of a girl showing up to geek up his gig. _That's_ a reputation I just didn't need on my first day.

Before I could think of how to let him down nicely, I processed the idea that he was in a band, which meant he was a musician. While I'd never had a boyfriend of any consequence, I'd always had a thing for musicians – especially their hands. My eyes went to his for the second, or was it third, time today considering his fingers. The universe seemed to really be having fun with me today in the form of Edward. Luckily the absurdity of it all wasn't lost on me.

Still unsure how to respond I turned to get into the thanks-to-Edward-now-running truck when it came out before I knew I'd said anything.

"Maybe." I couldn't help smiling at the flirty side of me I didn't know I'd had until then, and slammed the door.

I didn't, maybe I couldn't, move until after he was out of sight. If I'd had any close girlfriends to call and tell about this, they still wouldn't believe it.

And here I was sitting alone in the truck in the middle of the woods again with no trace that Edward had ever existed. Well of course there was my truck in drivable condition, but I'd seen enough movies where the heroine was actually psychotic or something and imagined things – like being alive even though she was dead or the door that couldn't have opened since it wasn't even a real door… considering that, I could rationalize imagining a guy like Edward.

It suddenly seemed quiet, too quiet. With quiet like this I'd easily let my own thoughts overwhelm me. Charlie had said the radio didn't work in this ancient beast, which honestly was fine for the majority of time, but during a moment like this I'd be happy listening to static. Which is exactly what I got when I turned the damn thing on. I watched the rain pick up as it pelted the windshield, idly turning the knob to adjust for stations. The static would occasionally vary in volume or intensity, sometimes hinting at the station that existed someplace at that number, but mostly holding true to what was forewarned.

I kept turning the knob slowly, expecting nothing, letting my mind think of Edward again – envisioning the path the solitary raindrop took as it moved along his body. As it began to slide down his throat in my fantasy I was startled to hear music coming through the speakers. Not "would you like a little music with your static" kind, but a station coming in crystal clear. A pre-recorded station callout declared it a "classic rock" station which was calming and serendipitous all at once. My mom was always into rock music, and, although she never volunteered much information, I was pretty sure she had spent a few summers on the road following a few bands around the country. (Which personally I always thought explained a lot…)

I pulled away from the side of the road and headed home when a familiar bass rhythm brought my attention back to the radio. I smiled to myself as I reached for the volume. _Shit, I _love_ this song_. I thought for a moment that it was ironic they'd be playing "Fool in the Rain" on a rainy day like this, until I remembered I was in Forks. They could play it _every_ day and it would still make sense.

I tapped the steering wheel along with it, attempting to keep my eyes focused on the road through the monsoon.

Robert Plant's voice grow desperate as he sang, always causing a little pang in my heart. Thinking of the poor fool waiting out in the rain for the woman he loves, wondering if she'll ever show up. Eventually he realizes she's not standing him up, he's just waiting for her in the wrong place.

I realized one day that I blush whenever I hear my favorite part of any song. It's infuriating how my body betrays me sometimes and it's ridiculous that I should be so easy to read. Not that anyone would know that was why I was blushing, but still. It's nice to have secrets now and then.

I felt the pink in my cheeks rise as he got to the lines that get to me every time:

_I'll run in the rain till Im breathless  
When I'm breathless Ill run till I dro__p_

In the past I'd picture a dark silhouette running down an empty street, desperate to get to the one he loves. I guess somewhere in my mind I always imagined myself as the destination. This time the lyrics made me think of Edward, picturing him hunched over my engine. He wasn't running, or breathless, but in his own way he was a fool. A fool for stopping in the rain to help a stranger, especially someone like me. A fool for making himself late to something obviously important to him. A fool for giving me butterflies, like he needs another girl crushing on him I'm sure.

* * *

I pulled up in front of the house in a daze, now picturing Edward running through the rain. I was beginning to think I was too far gone when I realized he was still wearing his jeans and t-shirt in this daydream. If I was truly too far gone I was sure at least the shirt would be gone.

Reeling myself back into the reality of the moment I went inside to exchange the non-details of my day with Charlie. I hadn't even told him about my truck's suicide attempt since he'd just given it to me hours before. Conveniently enough, this allowed for me to leave Edward out of the story completely. The last thing Charlie needed on his first day as a full-time parent to a teenage daughter was to find out about this new fixation. Plus, who know if it'd even last?

Out of curtosy I mentioned I might be going to see a band at the Apple, "or something." What I didn't anticipate was opening up Pandora 's Box, giving Charlie an opportunity to launch into a tirade about the apparently an overpriced coffeehouse where high school students "loitered" and "took caffeine ingestion to the point where it should be illegal." Despite the scowl on Charlie's face, I was still considering going, although it would be a big consideration.

A part of me really wanted to see Edward; however that part was immediately countered by the part of me that realized he might think I was obsessed if I showed up like we'd known each other for years. Then the first part would argue that I'd been invited, _out of pity_ the other part would say. It went on like this until I found myself humming "Fool in the Rain" in the shower and I let the part of me wanting to go win out.

I dressed, added a fresh spritz of my favorite scent ("confidence in a bottle," I always thought), and put on some eyeliner and lip gloss in a hurry. By this point I'd be cutting it close, if they were still there at all.

Shouting my intentions to Charlie as I headed out the door would have been useless, he was already passed out in the couch. Instead I scribbled a note so he wouldn't panic and hopped into my truck, stroking the dashboard hoping the beast and I could get along tonight.

I remembered approximately where the Apple was from the quick stop I'd made yesterday, and it wasn't difficult to recognize. It was a hole in the wall place with a simple red apple logo outside. I parked the truck and sat, suddenly very unsure about deciding to come. Maybe I was the fool this time.

I looked through the front set of windows and saw mostly darkness and shadows the moody lighting threw against the glass. I could hear the thump of the bass, but couldn't tell what they were playing.

_Ok, here's your evidence_. _He's real and he's in there. What are you going to do now?_

The fact that I was asking myself pretty much indicated I didn't know the answer. I got out of the truck, throwing my hood over my head, hesitantly heading for the door. I didn't have it in me to open it right away, instead watching them play The Clash through the window. It was steamed up a bit from the inside making it difficult to see exactly what was going on, but when I heard his voice I knew it in an instant. I knew I was blushing, but realized the odds of him noticing that, let along noticing my presence at all, was unlikely.

Hearing his voice was that much better from inside the Apple, making everything I'd thought about him over the past few hours even more real. I tried to hide how uncomfortable it was to be alone, with the only familiar face stealing the show up on the stage. Buying a cup of coffee would at least give me a reason to be there. I got in line and quickly ordered a latte – I needed something that took a few minutes to make, giving my heart a chance to calm down before attempting to look in his direction.

I was disappointed when the song ended and was more disappointed to hear the next song would be their last. Their song choices made me happy, partially because they seemed to be so in line with what I liked and partially because it might mean Edward and I had something in common.

I was sure it was his intriciate playing that started off the next song even though I was too afraid to confirm my suspicions. It was surprise, however, to hear his voice begin to sing "Black Magic Woman" - my knees practically buckling as the weight of passion in his voice seemed to permeate every bit of breathing space. He sung it deep, and heavy, and seemed to make it more sensual than it already was. Looking up at him wasn't an option at this point, it was a necessity.

I figured I'd gawk safely from a distance and then leave without his every knowing I was there, but when I glanced up at the platform his eyes were fixated, waiting for me. All I could do was look back. I'd heard people talk about "making love" with eyes before, but I'd never experienced something worthy of the label. Until now. Edward Cullen, _what_ are you doing?

If I'd been brave I'd have stayed to ask him, but instead I let the furiously flapping butterflies in my stomach lead me out the door as soon as the crowd started to applaud their finale.

The cool air rushed over me as I got into the street, blowing the hood from my head and whipping my hair around furiously. I didn't reach to pull it back up, instead letting the raindrops land where they may. I needed to cool down after _that_.

Whatever _that_ was.

* * *

**Author's Note: I went back and posted the version of each song that inspired me to write the chapter. Those of you who are interested can start your own "Tragic Turn" playlist, lol.**

**I am not only inspired by the songs I pick, but listen to them constantly while writing. I compulsively listened to "Fool in the Rain" while writing this chapter – hopefully the essence of the song made it into the writing…**

**Since this was basically Chapter 3 from Bella's POV I'll repost the songs referenced that were in Chap 3 too, enjoy!**

**Santana - "Black Magic Woman"**

**The Clash - "Should I Stay or Should I Go"**

**LOVE your reviews so far… Remember, reviews are like Edward making sex eyes from across the room… (I know, I know… I wish too…)**

**L.**


	4. Crimson & Clover

**Author's Note: I have the BEST readers ever! You guys motivate me not only to keep going, but to make every chapter the best it can be. I'****ve been neglecting everyone and everything in my life for this chapter so I hope you really enjoy it! **

**Of course, everything **_**Twilight**_** belongs to SM…**

**Tommy James & The Shondells – Crimson & Clover**

**(Joan Jett also does a kickass version, but Tommy James, the original version, is the one referenced in the chapter. If I was you, I'd give it a listen either before or while you're reading…)**

* * *

Chapter 4 – Crimson and Clover

EPOV

I should have been on top of the fucking world. Everything at the Apple went like clockwork. Even the unexpected change to the setlist went over well and the crowed was not only responsive, but energetic. What more could a guy want?

I'll tell you want I wanted. I wanted to see her up close again, to inhale that mysteriously delicious scent, and be able to finally digest the idea of her without my thoughts starting to sound like a giggling schoolgirl.

Just thinking of the word "school" made me start to think about her beyond the things that immediately attracted me. Somewhere, right now, she was out there. She was either visiting and I'd most likely never see her again, which I fought hard to determine was unlikely seeing as how I'd seen her on two consecutive days in our little town, _or_ she was new. And if she was new, and approximately my age, she'd be going to school on Monday.

I wasn't used to this kind of snowball-effect thinking. If it had been Alice going on at the dinner table about a guy she'd met, or seen, or dreamt about, I'd find it ridiculous, roll my eyes, and chalk it up to the nature hormonal teenage girls. Going through _my_ head this kind of mental rambling just felt wrong.

The more I tried to distract myself from thinking about Bella and whether I'd ever see her again, the more she seemed to aggressively fight her way into my thoughts. Spending a lot of time with Opal on the floor of my room would usually do the trick, but I knew the songs I was playing too well. It only left my mind free to wander, and it wandered right up to Bella Swan wanting to touch her face, her lips, her body...

"What are you drooling about?" Alice always had a delicate way with words.

"What?" I mean, what else could I say? _A dark haired temptress that seems to be driving me insane without actually doing anything at all_. I don't _think_ so.

She sat cross-legged on the floor in front of me, giving me one of her famously intense stares.

"Quit it. You know I fucking hate when you do that." She always, _always_ saw right through me and although it never surprised me, it bothered me just the same.

"Why Edward Cullen," a Cheshire grin slowly spreading from ear to ear, "I believe you've got a girl on your mind."

_Fuck_. _I really am that transparent_. "Alice, don't you have something you should be doing?" I know if I'd made a comment like that to Emmett he'd have responding with a comment about how he should be "doing" Rosalie right about now, but Alice responded in her own way. Her small punch was powerful and made contact with my shoulder faster than I'd expected it.

Before exiting she turned back with an expression on her face I recognized as starting trouble. "Not that I want to ruin your little fantasy or anything," which of course meant that she did, "but I'd have thought a guy with a sister. No, wait, not just a sister – a _twin_ sister – would be more sensitive to women and not be so quick to objectify them. I mean, what if someone was thinking of _me _like that…"

She didn't need to say another word, she had already thoroughly bursted my bubble and little images of Alice's face with that all-knowing look of hers were steadily dancing through my head. I held up a hand to silence her and motioned for her to move along. She was only too quick to oblige knowing she'd been able to completely destroy my stream of happy thoughts. I was usually up for the sport of sibling torture, apt to reciprocate – but tonight I was only too eager to keep up the distractions.

I spent a few minutes trying to play from memory a new song I'd heard before Bella was able to reenter my thoughts fully, pushing the little dancing Alice faces aside like sinking birthday balloons.

I became aware that I'd been smiling after a few minutes when my face suddenly felt tight. Smiling for extended periods of time would never be my Olympic event. Although, now I seemed to have excellent motivation.

And thinking of her allowed me to imagine that scent again, it was almost tangible. It also helped to alleviate the knot in my stomach that had formed when she disappeared from the Apple on Friday night. _Hang in there till Monday, buddy and you'll find out either way. Then you can move on. _

Even though they were my own words I didn't quite believe them.

* * *

Waiting for Monday invoked the feelings of youthful Christmas Eves - watching the clock, stomach bordering on nauseously anxious. It was disgusting and juvenile and I wanted it to stop. _Immediately_.

I sped into the Forks High School parking lot a solid twenty minutes earlier than normal telling myself I really needed to talk to Jasper right away, however I was well aware that I had dissected every possibility and determined that if Bella was going to show up today she'd be early. A low chuckle escaped my lips as I edited my thoughts to include her truck. If I was driving that truck to my first day of school in a new town I'd leave hours early in case the thing started to fall apart on the way, piece by piece.

Five minutes before homeroom was set to begin, without even a false alarm sighting, I sulked into the building. I don't genuinely know what I was expecting to happen, but not seeing her this morning came as a huge blow of disappointment.

Mr. Banner's science lab was also my homeroom and I'd always enjoyed that the class seemed to be odd numbered, giving me the table all to myself. Today it ignited a twisted sense of hope as I allowed myself to fantasize that, if by some miraculous alignment of the stars, she did end up here, she'd have to sit with me. I allowed my eyelids to close as I thought of being able to see her, to smell her, to be this close to her every day.

A lull in classroom activity allowed enough silence to hear the doorknob turn and the old wooden door begin to open. I held my breath, eyes glued to the entryway, trying not to look as hopeful as I felt.

BPOV

A first day in a new school was kind of like a toothache and little needles being shoved through my eyes rolled into one. Or so I would imagine.

Charlie had left for work before I got up, but had taped to my door a notice he'd probably gotten in the mail weeks ago. It was a pre-typed postcard with details for new students and a few blanks so specifics could be typed in. My eyes went right to the only pieces of information relevant: my name, which simply read SWAN, the date I was to begin (all my hoping couldn't change the fact that it did indeed read today's date), and the name of the person described as my "Campus Escort." On the blank beneath the description was one word: CULLEN.

I felt heat radiate to my cheeks and out from my chest across my entire body. Was I still asleep upstairs dreaming that I'd be spending the entire day with the beyond sexy musician who had been seducing me from across the room only two days ago? The answer had to be yes since my life just wasn't this interesting. Any moment my alarm would go off and bring me back to reality.

Until then, I'd let myself enjoy this one.

My suspicions of lucid dreaming seemed further validated by the fact that I no sooner seemed to have stepped out through my front door than I was pulling into the parking lot at school. The rational side of my brain seemed to argue that I was lucky it could still function despite my new affinity for irrational daydreaming, but I shoved that part aside and jumped out of the truck ready for my day to start.

I was early and realized I didn't even know where to begin. I had pulled around back to the lot closest to the office. It seemed like miles from the lot where other students probably parked, but I wasn't used to the misty rain just yet and wanted to get my paperwork over with as quickly as possible. I started to wonder if he was in there waiting for me, to show me around the building, a personal guided tour. In my mind I emphasized the word _personal_ until it began to take on sexual connotations, feeling my cheeks heat up again. _Damn, even in my dreams I can't keep anything secret_.

I was promptly ushered into the principal's office for what she called a "getting to know you" session. Just hearing the phrase "getting to know you" began to make me question my current situation as one of dreams. The fact that the session dragged on for forty-five minutes seemed to drive the point home further.

I was already late for homeroom by the time she sent me to class, assuring me my Campus Escort would be "most helpful" today. It wasn't difficult to make that sound dirty in my head too and embarrassment washed over me in another long wave as I headed for the classroom at the end of the hall.

Pausing with my hand on the knob, I took a deep breath pleading with my flushed cheeks to calm down, even if it meant returning to the practically corpse-like pallor I normally wore. I was ready to see him again, to see if the intensity I saw on Friday was legit or just a part of the act. Plus, I was ready to repay the kindness he'd shown me the day he fixed my truck…_Hell yeah I was blushing this time, and I didn't care…_

Opening the door slowly, wanting the moment to last, I peered into the room mentally trying to build the confidence necessary to reinvent myself here in Forks, giving off a first impression of sexy and exotic.

However, life doesn't always turn out the way you expect. No one had to tell me this, I was _constantly_ learning it firsthand.

Laughter spilled from deep in my chest before I could even hand my entrance slip and late pass in to the teacher. I was suddenly absolutely positive that I was most definitely _not_ dreaming.

Every face, now staring back at the hysterical freak in the doorway, was wearing lip gloss and the same maroon and navy blue plaid skirt I'd been issued. I mentally started keeping score, declaring Charlie-1, Bella-0.

Apparently Pinethrush Academy was an all-girls school. Now _this_ seemed a little bit more like my life.

For someone who'd never had to parent a teenage daughter before, I had to give Charlie credit. He really seemed to know what he was doing…

Still shaking my head in disbelief, not yet ready to let the disappointment hit me, I approached the teacher with my slips and she silently motioned to a smiling girl in the back of the room.

"Hi," her voice too alert and chipper for first thing in the morning. "I'm Alice, Alice Cullen. I'm going to show you around today."

The universe couldn't be funnier if it tried.

* * *

My day with Alice actually made me forget about the crushing disappointment still lurking somewhere beneath the surface. She was adorable and seemingly genuine. It only took me a few anxious periods, and a mental pro-con list, before deciding to ask about Edward. I wasn't sure what I wanted to hear the answer – they either were or were not related.

Turns out the elaborate plan I'd been concocting on how to bring up the subject "casually" wasn't necessary.

Alice's phone vibrated loudly against the table during lunch and she scrolled through her messages half-heartedly, sighing exuberantly. "Bella, do you have brothers?"

Our conversations had been pretty light so far and family life really hadn't come up –which suited me fine. My life, despite the recent relocation, really wasn't exciting enough to waste words on describing. "Um, no. No, it's just me."

She threw her arm around my shoulder, laying her petite forehead against me in true dramatic fashion. "Adopt me! I've got two!" Her entire demeanor indicated humor, but I thought on some level it must be really rough being the only girl in a family. My mind again flashed to thoughts of Edward and realized I should now be fishing for information. But it wasn't really "fishing" since I liked Alice. I guess I'd call it being genuinely interested.

Something about her made me comfortable enough to ask for more information. "Why? What happened?"

She waved her hand in the air theatrically, reminding me of a 1940's starlet or something. "Oh nothing. I just get a text every single day from my deranged twin brother commanding that I be waiting out front for him after school." She turned to me, head cocked to one side and eyes slanted in my direction. "Now I ask you, do _you_, a person who's pretty much just met me, think I need this reminder _every_ day?"

"Well," I began cautiously before going for the gusto, "you said your brother's deranged. That pretty much explains things doesn't it?"

She responded with a hearty laugh and nodded, her short dark locks swaying with each bob of her head. "I knew I liked you, Bella Swan." Alice's hand smoothed her impeccably tailored plaid skirt, her eyes gazing downward before continuing. "To be honest, I don't seem to relate very well to other girls. Being here is hell. I was pretty much sentenced here to focus on grades and schoolwork. My idiot brothers somehow convinced our parents I was too boy crazy for public school or something…" she trailed off before amending her words. "Actually it wasn't Edward so much…"

_Oh. My. God._ She just went ahead and said his name like it was nothing. _Ok, Bella, you're a fucking moron. I mean he's her _brother_. To her, he _is_ nothing…_

It felt good to know Alice was comfortable opening up to me. It felt better to know she shared genetic material with the man of my dreams. _Focus!_

The façade of clever and casual fell by the wayside when I blurted out the obvious, in the form of a question: "Your brother is Edward Cullen?"

She smiled into space incredulously. "In, addition to being my brother, he's also a loner, moody, and practically socially retarded. How did all of that loveliness manage to make an impression on you in the mere hours you've been in town?" She wasn't being facetious, just surprised I knew him – or knew _of_ him.

"Actually," _careful Bella…filter! _"he came to my rescue. My truck gave up on me in the middle of nowhere and he showed up and fixed it." I watched her face for the honest expression only a family member could have.

She smiled sweetly and gave one short nod. "That actually sounds exactly like him. I can be rough on him sometimes, but he's actually such a good soul it's ridiculous."

Good soul! My mind inadvertently drifted back to the grey t-shirt clinging across his chest. Imagine that in addition to all of the other things that were already so good about him…

I caught up with Alice mid-way through a tirade about the girls at Pinethrush and the rumor mill circulating about Edward. She leaned forward, lowering her voice to a whisper – "Don't listen to anything these girls say about him. He doesn't date and it kills just about every eligible skank in town. The truth of it is he's too passionate for women right now, it's all about the music."

I took in every word she said, but didn't respond. I knew Alice was being forthright, but my experiences with him seemed to somewhat contradict "not interested in dating" image he'd set for himself around here. He actually came across as kind of lonely.

Maybe sometimes it takes a set of fresh eyes to see things as they really are.

Coming to this conclusion, I forcefully locked my Edward thoughts away for later. I was really enjoying my time with Alice and didn't want to risk missing out on having an actual girlfriend when such a great candidate was handed to me.

I silently took an oath to be friends with Alice only because I liked her and wanted to be. Her incredibly sexy brother was just a perk.

* * *

I spent my days with Alice, feeling like a "normal" girl for the first time in…well pretty much ever, and my nights thinking of the grey t-shirt. Sometime in between I fit in meals and homework with minimal effort.

My curiosities about Edward were strong, but I pushed them away whenever I was with Alice in an attempt to separate things. It was a challenge every time I heard her full name, or when she smiled a certain way that seemed so much like the Edward I pictured. Not having to see him in school every day was probably the one thing saving me from inadvertently sabotaging my relationship with Alice and I would do whatever I could to preserve the friendship that had blossomed in only a matter of days.

During school on Friday she'd invited me to sleep over at her house that night. "Rosalie and I've been looking for an excuse to watch _Dirty Dancing_ and would kill for a night without having to obsess about guys for once." I hadn't actually met Rosalie, but I felt like I knew her from Alice's well-mimed stories. The fact that she was dating Alice's oldest brother, Emmett, struck me as a potential meeting point for Rosalie and me: we both seemed to have a _thing_ for Cullen boys.

Everything about her invitation sounded so normal I was actually excited about the idea. Her comment about the guys led me to believe Edward wouldn't be there, probably for the best, but just knowing I'd be in the place where he _lived_ romanticized the whole thing.

Accepting was a no-brainer.

My last period lit class had been cancelled so I left early to pack and track down Charlie to tell him where I'd be. I could never relax enough to have fun thinking he'd missed my note on the counter and was probably sending a S.W.A.T. team out to find me. The thought alone was enough to make me curl up and die of mortification.

I almost slid down the slick hall in my socks running for the phone as I hurriedly packed my essential toiletries. Alice was calling to ask if I needed a lift since her brother had just picked her up from school and they were right around the corner.

Glancing out the window towards the beast in the driveway gave me pangs of guilt similar to those you'd get ditching a date with your grandma, but I accepted the ride anyway. I'd been fantasizing about being inside that silver Volvo, watching his hands as he drove, and if one little three-letter word was all it took to make that happen I'd gladly oblige.

I had wanted to put on some lip gloss and fix my hair before they showed up, but all I could find was cherry ChapStick and a headband. I added a healthy spray of my favorite scent to counterbalance the nervousness threatening to completely engulf me at any moment as I stood at the window waiting to see headlights turn into the driveway. I couldn't be sure if seeing them would make the anxiety better or worse, but I'd reasoned that if I didn't throw up it was at least a good sign.

The blinding streak of headlights forced my eyes closed as I groped for my bag and the doorknob simultaneously. My eyes stayed focused on the ground so I could, A. make it to the car without tripping and B. collect myself before having to face him. The long, steady breaths of cool air seemed to help – boosting my self esteem as I pulled the car door open.

Ready to climb inside, I finally shifted my eyes up to the car itself – prepared to aim a smile at my chauffeur, when I was suddenly taken by surprise. I think I actually gasped in horror as my eyes met a stranger in a very large, very high automobile.

This time I thought I was going to throw up for sure, until I suddenly became able to process the voices around me.

"…I don't know, Emmett. She doesn't always look like that."

"Should I go help her or something?"

It was this phrase that brought words to my lips and allowed my vision to focus. "I'm fine, sorry. I think it was just a moment of low blood sugar or something." I could see Alice's bright smile from the backseat and her large, intimidating brother complete with a goofy grin in the driver's seat.

"Nice to meet you," _even though you're not the brother I was hoping for_, "I'm Bella."

Emmett smiled again, this time with the same one-sided smirk I'd seen on both Alice and Edward. He didn't introduce himself, but instead sent the jeep lurching forward as the phrase "That sounds Italian" was spoken in barely a whisper. Something about him seemed childlike despite his obvious size and strength. For a first impression I found the contrast endearing and realized the Cullen family was probably the only thing that kept Forks from being a total snoozefest.

I suddenly felt lucky to know them.

There was no Volvo in sight as we pulled up to the beautiful old house, and I let out a long, deep breath actually feeling relieved. Emmett honked once before peeling away from the curb, the deep rumble practically deafening.

Alice didn't flinch or look in the direction of the noise. Instead she used her dramatics to emphasize a sense of good riddance. "The guys have band practice so they'll be out of our hair. Besides, we've got a hot date with Johnny Castle." The cliché of it all would have been mortifying if it didn't feel so good.

I attributed the goodness entirely to Alice. "Thanks for inviting me Alice; I really needed a night like this." Even knowing I probably wouldn't get to see Edward at all, I really meant every word.

Rosalie showed up sometime between the manicure Alice insisted on giving me and the false eyelashes she insisted on applying ("Come _on_, Bella! It's like playing with a life size Barbie!"). I was stunned by her presence, not expecting the confident strides of a leggy blonde. I suddenly felt small, insignificant, and sad. Alice was adorable, but allowed me to feel normal. Rosalie made me feel _normal_, in a very different way.

The three of us got along reasonably well, but I preferred the dynamic before she had arrived. A part of me couldn't help thinking that this was what Edward was used to looking at and comparatively I was the weed in the garden.

Luckily Alice's bubbly outbursts made it impossible to stay somber for long, and we dimmed the lights, sprawling across her indulgently fluffy bed to watch Baby and Johnny, remarkably different types, fall in love.

Alice's mom, Esme, had once attended the culinary institute. Although she was capable of making what could only be described as beyond gourmet cuisine, Alice assured me her real claim to fame was popcorn. From the week I'd known her so far, Alice was an incredibly picky eater. Her pallet seemed to max out with grilled cheese, soup and simple salads which probably killed her mother, but her vice was salty snacks. Esme had brought up a bowl of the most incredibly prepared popcorn I'd ever tasted to accompany our movie.

"Thank goodness Emmett seems to eat for two or I'd never get a chance to exercise my skills." She was kind, beautiful, and motherly in a way that doesn't come naturally to all women with children. It made me miss my own mother, despite the erratic behavior she usually exhibited. I made a mental promise to pencil in more "girl time" now that I actually had a friend to spend it with.

Alice and Rosalie had fallen asleep across the large bed before the movie was over and I'd curled up in the oversized armchair with Alice's yearbook collection from years past. Last year's book was first on my list, ready to immerse myself in everything a Forks teenager should know. At least that was my cover story. I'd been too afraid to really look around the Cullen house for evidence of Edward, not wanting to upset the balance of things. But seeing him here, in print, beside an impeccably dressed Alice no doubt, would make things real again.

My stomach full of popcorn and Coke gurgled thinking of how much more complicated things would be if I had to sleep knowing he was only a room or two away. Having the guys gone tonight was undoubtedly the right way to go.

His photograph was a perfect likeness, but didn't do him justice. It was grainy and black and white and in a word, contrived. I flipped back to the beginning and went through each page, wondering what else I'd learn about him. Emmett seemed to be on every page with a broad smile and some kind of athletic jersey. Alice and Rosalie too had several pictures woven throughout the volume, but Edward was remarkably absent.

It wasn't until one of the last pages that I again saw his face, a color photo candidly taken from a distance: Edward in the grass in front of the building with his guitar. It was obvious he didn't know there was a camera anywhere in the vicinity because the look on his face was unguarded. His fingers about to engage the strings, his eyes closed. This was the closest thing I could imagine to the _real_ Edward. I felt my cheeks heat up, turning pink, and realized this time I wasn't even having dirty thoughts.

Alice let out a soft sigh in her sleep, drawing my attention back to my surroundings. The digital alarm clock on her nightstand announced 2:14 in the morning and I figured if I wanted Charlie to let me out regularly I'd have to look healthy when I returned tomorrow. And honestly, I could be a cranky bitch if I didn't get at least a few hours of sleep.

I took my toiletries out of my overnight bag and snuck out into the hallway. I tried to mentally identify doors from the little bits I could see. The large door at one end of the hallway was obviously the master bedroom and the narrow one next to the bathroom looked like a linen closet. There were two doors on the other side of the hall that must have both been bedrooms. The one closest to me was entirely dark and something round seemed to reflect light from someplace. The other door was mostly closed and to see inside I'd have had to overshoot the bathroom. Afraid this would seem suspicious if anyone had caught me, my curiosity was left unfed as I reached my final destination.

The large bathroom was very white, and very comforting. Double sinks and a large, old-fashioned bathtub raised off the floor on curled feet. There was even a vase of fresh wildflowers on the countertop, which I was sure Esme replaced regularly. I studied everything as I furiously brushed my teeth hoping to dislodge those horribly annoying bits of popcorn that cling to the hardest-to-reach places.

Once satisfied with the technicalities of my evening routine, I ran my fingers through my hair and walked on tiptoes out into the hallway making as few creaks as possible. The old home had character galore, but it was also the kind of place that presented its own soundtrack filled with a betrayal of floorboard squeaks.

I noticed something seemed different than it had minutes ago and stopped in my tracks, resting my perched feet flat on the floor. My eyes scanned back and forth until a sound caught my attention.

EPOV

Alice had warned me to stay out of the house until tomorrow, but after practice I was confronted with two choices. One was going to Seattle with Jasper and Emmett. Jasper and Roaslie's uncle Oscar had a bar in the city, The Hale Hole. He didn't give a shit about IDs which usually attracted tons of teenagers, and for reasons foreign to me a majority of them were girls. And he would occasionally give out free shots on slow nights which attracted the kind of girls Jasper and Emmett were looking for tonight. Considering my sister was in love with one and my childhood crush was in love with the other I would have been pissed by their man-whore tendencies, but Emmett always called nights like this "window shopping." That was something I could understand since, according to his analogy, I hadn't actually been buying anything myself lately.

Choice two was heading home to face the wrath of Alice, which definitely gave me pause, but ultimately I'd rather just unwind, listen to some music, and pretend I wasn't a social screw up. If I was normal Bella would have stayed longer the night of the show and then I could have actually talked to her like a human being. Instead, I scared her off with intense eye-fucking from across the room, relegating myself to tormented thoughts of whether or not I'd ever get another shot.

I rolled my eyes passing her closed bedroom door, hearing an awful voice singing something about having "the time of my life" coming from within. I knew Rosalie and Alice had been planning on some kind of female night of torture, but I didn't realize bad movies of the 80's were on the menu.

Silently thanking my parents for giving the room farthest from hers, I put my guitar case down on my bed, immediately switching on the small stereo with my ipod already inserted. Sitting on the floor, back against the side of my bed, I put my head down against my knees just listening. I wasn't religious, but I couldn't help pleading with the universe to give me the strength to forget about the girl and everything that came with her. It had been harder than ever to concentrate at band practice, my mind constantly drifting. It was so unlike me it was scary. And I once again saw two possibilities: I could get the girl and put myself out of my misery or I could force myself to move on. Although I completely realized that option two didn't necessarily include a reduction of my constant misery.

I'd always secretly had a theory that the "shuffle" feature on an ipod was pretty much a glorified mood ring. Although songs were supposed to turn up in a random order, they always seemed to match what was going on at any giving moment, making me think of a movie soundtrack. If I'd ever wanted to be disproved it was now, but in a moment of true clairvoyance my playlist threw my mood back into my face.

_They say misery, loves company_

_We could start a company, _

_And make misery_

_Frustrated Incorporated_

A content smile spread across my face as I finally allowed myself to embrace the fact that this girl made me absolutely miserable in a way that I absolutely loved. I grabbed Opal out of the open case and started to strum along with the song, thinking about Bella and how at least in the song misery had company…

A light sweet smell wafted into through the small crack of doorway left open and it was like being haunted. It was her, it was _that_ smell. I started wondering if a song about slowly going insane would come up next because _that_ would fit the moment. And daydreaming about her was one thing, but actually thinking I could smell her was borderline scary.

I sang along with the end of the song, softly strumming and smiling even wider than before. _Fuck it all. You want to think of her, than think of her. Crazy or not. _

The lapse between songs was quiet enough to hear a floorboard creak right outside my door. No one in my family was tactful enough to tiptoe through the hallways, no matter how late, and Rosalie probably would have made a snide comment by now if it was her. Considering I'd just embraced my inner insanity I figured I'd better investigate to see just now far gone I really was.

"Hello?"

I heard the creaking again, and a human silhouette stepped into the small space between the almost closed door and the doorframe.

Ok the insanity had definitely progressed quicker than I thought. I could see Bella's small face hidden behind her dark shiny hair. The intoxicating scent practically visible in the air as it wafted towards me.

I said nothing and watched her. She said nothing and watched me back.

If I was going to accept mental instability I was going to revel in it. "Come in." Imaginary Bella obliged, slinking in and sitting on the floor in front of me.

Once again, she said nothing. I noticed she was wearing grey pajama pants and a navy blue tank top, which seemed odd since I'd never seen her in clothes like that before. I blinked once or twice wondering if I imagined some kind of lingerie if she'd be wearing that instead. Turns out it doesn't work that way.

Her eyes, still aimed squarely at mine, seemed confused. Maybe imaginary Bella didn't know she was imaginary. I was surprised to hear her voice.

"Hi." A pink flush came to her cheeks and I remembered how much I loved that. I inhaled deeply again to fill my lungs with her scent.

The song from my stereo changed again, a desperate moan coming from the speakers all around me. I had always had a special place in my heart for this song, but couldn't really attach it to a specific time or feeling. Hearing it now would change all that.

_Now I don't hardly know her_

_But I think I could love her_

_Crimson and clover_

Rumor had it the song was just one big psychedelic drug reference, but I didn't buy it. Especially not now, seeing her face, smelling her, practically feeling the heat she radiated. This was most definitely _not_ a drug song.

It was…_sexy_.

She didn't speak again until the singing broke for the long guitar solo, filled with wah-wah pedal and wailing riffs. "I didn't think you'd be here."

The side of me really getting into the song, the slow sexy repetition, gave me the confidence to arch an eyebrow in her direction. "Where else would I be?"

Her cheeks flamed and I was satisfied that my fantasy Bella behaved exactly the way the real Bella would have.

She smiled. "I saw you the other night. Your band. You were…incredible."

I looked down at her small wrist, dangling across her knee, so small and fragile. "I saw you there."

As I allowed myself a stolen glance at her face, she was waiting for me. Holding my gaze again.

"I know you did." It was a confidence I didn't know she'd had. I wasn't sure whether it was the song, or what she said, or how she said it, but being with her like this was incredibly intimate.

We sat there again, quietly. I decided if I couldn't be honest with my delusions, then when could I?

"I've been thinking about you."

She seemed genuinely surprised at my confession. "Only good things I hope"

This girl was driving me _crazy_.

The song started to wrap up, hearing the distorted singing begin to repeat:

_Crimson and clover, over and over_

She unfolded her legs and stood, smiling over her shoulder as she reached for the door. I don't know what came over me, but I grabbed her wrist – stopping her dead in her tracks. I brought it to my face and inhaled, deep into my chest.

Smelling the exotic mixture of unidentifiable flowers ripped open a seam on my internal impulse control and I gently touched my lips to her wrist before letting it go.

I looked again to the doorway, but she was gone. And I knew I was in trouble. I was in _way _too deep.

I stood and went to the door, looking out into the hall, but there was no evidence she'd ever been there. Kicking it closed, I reclined along the bottom of my bed – letting my eyes flutter closed.

I knew in moments I'd be asleep – which was better than being awake with the kind of thoughts I'd been having – but I was awake long enough to hear the first few notes of Black Magic Woman as I drifted off.

* * *

**Author's Note: I don't know about you, but I'm steamed up after that encounter... A strong suggestion: close your eyes, lay back, and play the song again. **

**Other Songs Mentioned: **

**Soul Asylum - Misery**

**As always, I'd LOVE to hear your feedback! After all, reviews are like being in Edward's bedroom late at night – both are exciting, intimidating, and make me blush! (or so I would imagine…)**

**L. **


	5. Everlong

**Author's Note: Oh. My. God. You guys only get better and better! I'm astounded by your feedback and wanted to thank you with what I suspect may be the best chapter yet. There have been a bunch of revisions on this, and I think you'll be pleasantly surprised with how it turned out. **

**Also, this thing is really taking on a life of its own… there are songs in my life just begging, **_**pleading**_** with me to get into this story. A few of them actually made it into this chapter! I'll provide the artist and song title info at the bottom if you're interested. **

**Of course, everything **_**Twilight**_** belongs to SM…**

**Foo Fighters – Everlong **

**(NOTE: the original version is great, but I used an acoustic version for inspiration in case anyone wants to listen specifically to that)**

**Enjoy!**

**L.**

* * *

Chapter 5 – Everlong

BPOV

_Christ_. Although I'm pretty sure it's impossible, my heart felt like it was thumping against the inside of my chest wanting out.

I wanted to be able to doubt the existence of the last few moments, but I couldn't. I was most definitely inside of Edward Cullen's bedroom late at night. He most definitely kissed my wrist – _my wrist!_ And, although the part where he spoke was kind of fuzzy, I'm pretty sure he had admitted to having thoughts of me. I had never felt more like I was living someone else's life.

I remember hearing once that comedians try to leave the stage on a high note. They can sense that they've reached the pinnacle and bow out gracefully. The minute I heard Edward say he'd been thinking of me I realized the moment couldn't possibly get any better. I mean, for all I knew he was preparing to add that he was thinking of how he stood out in the rain practically catching pneumonia for me or how I made him late. I didn't want to hang around long enough to find out.

As I felt him grasp my wrist, his strong fingers sending a jolt up through my arm and into my chest exactly the way the way I imagine those paddles they use to bring you back to life feel. Only instead of restarting my heart, he seemed to stop it. The heat of his breath against me, inhaling with a look of contentment I couldn't begin to decode.

His lips grazed the smooth space beneath the heel of my hand, and I became aware that I hadn't been breathing. I literally could not tolerate another moment like this and slipped through the doorway the second he let my hand drop freely.

I slipped into Alice's room silently; she and Rosalie still curled up in throw blankets on top of her covers. All I could do was sit in the armchair and reflect on what had happened. It didn't matter that I had witnessed everything myself, I still required the mental version of instant replay to really begin to absorb the reality of things.

The first hints of rising sunlight changed the room to an unnamable rosy color. I couldn't help but notice the half smile present across Alice's sleeping face, reminding me of what I loved and cherished about her as a friend. I knew I couldn't stay there after what had transpired. It wouldn't be about girlfriends anymore; it was all about Edward. And it wasn't fair to her.

Scribbling a note on a piece of stationary from Alice's desk, I slipped out of the house, bag in hand. I was pretty sure if I walked at a normal pace I'd make it home just after Charlie would have left. I'd have hated to explain this one to him.

* * *

EPOV

Waking up filled me with two strangely intense thoughts. The first was that I'd had a psychotic episode the night before, the second was that it really didn't _seem_ like a psychotic episode. _Think about it, smart guy. You think if you were having a psychotic episode it would seem all "guys in white and butterfly nets" to you?_

Good enough. A little rationalization could go a long way when I really didn't want to know the answer to whatever it was I was thinking.

Rosalie and Alice were talking a mile a minute when I got down into the kitchen, and the cranky-ass side of me wanted nothing but some quiet. I was prepared to demand it of them when what they were saying suddenly piqued my interest.

"Do you think Bella got sick or something?" Alice's face seemed concerned, but I couldn't put together what Alice and Bella had to do with one another.

Rosalie, seeming generally disinterested, gave a yawn as she replied. "No, jeez. She wrote that she forgot she had something to do this morning. Let it go."

I hadn't realized I'd frozen, jug of OJ in one hand, refrigerator door in the other, until both girls were silently staring at me.

"What?"

"You were staring first. What's your problem?" I may have been staring, but I wasn't looking. All I could do was try and piece together in what universe Alice, Rosalie, and potentially Bella Swan would wind up in the same sentence.

Alice piped in with a question I could more easily answer: "Why are you here anyway? Weren't you supposed to be gone all night?"

"Yeah," I rubbed the back of my neck with one hand to buy myself a few moments before having to continue. "I just didn't have a night at The Hale Hole in me. At least I waited until the two of you were passed out before coming back." I only mentioned the bar in an attempt to deflect the conversation onto Emmett and Jasper, but they didn't take the bait.

"Three of us actually." What was left of Alice's partial smile fell as she heard herself speaking the words. "Bella ducked out sometime before we got up."

Rosalie let out a scream as the orange juice I knocked over dripped down the front of her lap. "_What_ the fuck is your problem today?"

Ignoring her completely, I turned to my deflated sister. She of all people would have found humor in watching Rosalie go ape shit, but instead she sat with her head resting in her hand. Taking careful consideration to speak slowly and clearly, I was finally able to form the words: "Alice, are you telling me Bella Swan was in this house last night?"

Her eyes shifted to the side to meet mine without otherwise moving a muscle. "Yes. But she left in the middle of the night and I just don't get it."

It was only a short moment before I could see that sparkle in her eyes. I know that sparkle, it means she's thinking…

I began cautiously. "Alice –"

"Edward. Why are you suddenly interested in the whereabouts of Bella Swan?" Her white teeth emerging from between her lips as they pulled into a wide grin. "I thought you just fixed her truck or something?"

Rosalie, practically choking on the tall cup of coffee she was sipping, spit a mouthful across the already messy table. "_You_? You fixed a truck?" I wished I had the power to make her disappear entirely at this moment. I really don't need grief from all sides… "You don't know a carburetor from a gas cap."

I could hear myself whisper "Fuck off" beneath my breath but wasn't sure if she could hear it over her exasperated chuckling. "As a matter of fact I did fix it." My attention shifted back to Alice. "And I'm not _interested_. I was just surprised to hear you knew her."

"Edward," it was obvious that Alice was amused at this point, "maybe you could pull your head out of your ass for a few minutes and listen when I talk for once." Although I'd never admit it publicly, Alice was probably the closest thing I had to a best friend. I wasn't sure she meant to lay a guilt trip on me, but it showed up nonetheless. "We go to school together – practically every class. She's the first friend I've got in that dreadful place." She dramatically threw her head back, acting much more like herself.

"Oh." _Be casual, breezy. Pretend you don't care. _"Yeah, she seemed like a nice girl." I had a feeling if my voice hadn't cracked as I hit the word "nice" it _might_ have been believable…

"Edward!" Alice jumped from her seat, eyes large and white.

"No!"

"But –" She was glancing back and forth between floor tiles as if mentally putting puzzle pieces together.

"No!"

"You!"

"Alice –"

"Ok, I've figured it out – 'twin' is probably Latin for 'freak.' Cut that psychic shit out!" The sound of Rosalie's rough voice was startling after contending with Alice's small sweet voice that rises an extra octave when excited. "Alice, what's going on?"

I could have kissed Alice for her quick thinking and for taking enough sympathy on me to keep Rosalie in the dark. Tell Rosalie anything and she'd tell Emmett in one fraction of a second. Once _he_ knows something, consider it nationally broadcasted…

"Um, if my vibes are correct, and they usually are, I think Edward had a girl in his room last night!"

Rosalie had to fight from spraying coffee across the table again. "Cullen you've got a set on you! I was in the next room for Christ's sake!" Despite feigning outrage, I think I'd actually earned some respect points in her book.

I was literally saved by the bell when a chiming noise from Rosalie's pocked distracted her. I could tell it was Emmett from the disgustingly sweet voice she used to say "hello."

I mouthed the words "thank you" so only Alice could see and headed upstairs. "Edward –" I turned to face her. She didn't say anything else, but sent me the look I understood to mean "we are _so_ talking about this later." I just kept going. Maybe she'd forget by the time later came.

_Yeah right_.

* * *

Bella. Swan.

I wasn't sure if the new emotion I felt was relief or terror.

I guess dodging insanity and wild hallucinations would definitely have to fall into the category of relief, but I was also terrified. Without a doubt. The girl fled my house in the middle of the night after I sniffed her wrist and, by some definition, sexually assaulted her. _Although I didn't hear her complaining…_

There was no right answer for what to do next other than something. I didn't have a word to describe the feelings I was starting to have for this girl, but there was something very real there that I couldn't ignore. The urge to apologize was percolating somewhere inside, and I did the only thing I could think of.

I was in my car and on the road in less than three minutes. It was easy to argue that getting out of the house might infinitely delay the awkward conversation with Alice that would surely take place if I was around.

The microcosm that is Forks, Washington seemed to come in handy when you needed to find someone you didn't really know. In the case of Bella, everyone knew her dad, the chief of police, and exactly where he lived. Traffic in front of his house practically came to a crawl as if he'd run out the front door with his morning coffee in hand to distribute speeding tickets.

To my surprise, her red truck wasn't there when I pulled in front of the house. _Great_. _What now?_ It hadn't occurred to me that she might not be at home. I sat for a few minutes listening to something modern and shitty on the radio, but not paying enough attention to change it. The sun, now high in the morning sky, beat down through the front windshield. As the small space began to heat up, I threw my door open and walked towards the front door.

I remember once hearing that when you didn't know what else to do, do nothing. So that was my plan. I sat on her front steps, sunglasses in place, ready to wait. It was as close to doing nothing as I could get.

For the first time I realized how difficult it was to wait. Tom Petty seemed to have that one right; it really was the hardest part. Although, I'm sure I'd change my mind once it actually came time to face her…

My fingers couldn't help steadily drumming a few of the songs we'd been practicing lately, including something by a little band I'd never heard of until Jasper became a groupie or something. Three young guys with a major recording deal… not hard to understand why I didn't want to start kissing their asses and play one of their songs. But Jasper insisted the song he chose "spoke to him," and that's just the kind of thing I can't argue against. And as much as I'd hate to admit it, I kind of liked getting to sing on this one. The line I really got to wail, "What's your number, little girl?" made Bella's face flash before me every time I said it. It wasn't so much the idea of getting her number, but the idea of calling the words out to her from across a crowded room. And something about calling her "little girl" despite the smoldering in her eyes I knew was there, beneath the innocence…

Irony, thy name is timing. Just as my thoughts started to drift to something a little more, ahem, creative, I heard the truck rumbling up the street. I didn't move, just shifted my eyes in the direction of the horrendous sound – if cars could dry heave, this is what they'd sound like…

As she directed the truck into the driveway I could see her eyes were slanted. I didn't think she was angry…but there was something there. Disbelief maybe? She pulled forward into what I could only assume was her usual parking spot and cautiously got out of the truck. I didn't get up right way, letting her recognize I was here and not to attack her or surprise her. If I could have, I would have waved a white flag of surrender.

It wasn't fair to make her speak first. "Hi." _I know, I know… Cullen you are one profound bastard. _

"What are you – "I wondered if it was a bad sign that she didn't say "hi" back.

"I'm really sorry for just showing up here." Running my fingers through my out-of-control hair helped me compose myself for what had to be said. "I just really needed to apologize." For the first time since she'd arrived I allowed my eyes to meet hers. I wanted to her to know that I meant it.

"Apologize?"

"I –" another deep breath, "I heard you left in the middle of the night." I was right, fuck Tom Petty! This was the hardest part…

The look on her face was most definitely one of confusion, but a faint pink came to her cheeks indicating she was feeling more than that. She nodded slowly and sat on her front steps next to where I'd been waiting for her. Following suit, I rested beside her on the same step. We both stared straight ahead, and although I didn't know what she was thinking – I most definitely knew what I was thinking.

I didn't want to apologize. I wanted to touch her face, to stare into her eyes until she looked away, to tell her what she's been doing to me without even knowing it…

"Edward?" She could have knocked me over with a feather. I expected to be doing all of the talking myself. "I have a confession."

I did look at her this time, not understanding what anything had to do with anything. I must have arched an expectant eyebrow because she looked down before continuing to speak: "I'm a mess."

I didn't believe her words, not for one second, but I felt the hint of a smile pulling up at the corners of my mouth. "I am accident prone. I have zero self confidence. I keep to myself. I'm plainer than plain. And I've never, "she swallowed before continuing, "even been on a real date." Her eyes met mine unexpectedly. I suddenly got the impression she felt she'd said too much. "I didn't leave because of you, ok?"

My turn. "I don't understand. I just – I shouldn't have grabbed you last night. I didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable." Big. Deep. Breath. _Atta boy! _

She laughed. Not a full blown belly laugh, but a single chuckle. "You can't help making me feel uncomfortable." _Well fuck! What do I do with that?_ "You look at me differently from everyone else. And, trust me, I don't deserve it. _That_ makes me uncomfortable."

Anger surged through my veins, my heart suddenly accelerating. I normally had a very healthy filter before spewing forward everything I was thinking. Apparently it had "gone fishin'" or something today… "Don't ever fucking say that." I regretted dropping an f-bomb as soon as I'd heard it. It sounded so…_mean_.

She didn't look frightened, just surprised.

"I know I don't really know you. But I look at you differently because you're different." I turned my body to completely face her, wanting to be very deliberate in how this was delivered: "And _that_ is something to be proud of." A gentle breeze sent a vague trace of the scent I loved past my face, the hairs on the back of my neck suddenly standing on end.

I tried to communicate with my eyes everything I couldn't say. This was commonplace with Alice, but with things like "Emmett's such a douchebag" or "You're dressed kind of skanky tonight." But this was nothing like with Alice. I wasn't alone – she seemed to be pleading back with me without saying a word.

"Bella?"

She pushed her hair behind both ears before responding, "Hm?"

I knew what I wanted to do, and could think of only one way to get right to the point. _Don't say it, Cullen. She'll think you sound like 50's hoodlum or something. Well, I can see you're going to do exactly what you want anyway…_

I couldn't hide my full-blown smile. "Wanna get out of here?"

* * *

Making a beeline for my Volvo, I could hear Bella's steps heading in another direction. I stopped in place watching her, wondering when she'd realize we seemed to be on diverging paths. When she finally looked up, with a sheepish grin, I tilted my head in the direction of my car and said the only thing I could: "I've seen the way your car operates."

She walked slowly over to my passenger side door, a tight smile playing across her lips. "Can't argue that one."

I hadn't planned where we would go, but I aimed for someplace we could consider semi-neutral territory. She never even asked where we were headed, which meant she trusted me. And despite all of the asshole things I'd done in my time, I knew I wouldn't be like that with her. Her trust was important in a way I'd never considered before.

Maybe it was wanting her to feel safe that led me to a place where I felt particularly safe. We were in front of the Hale's house although the house itself didn't hold any special feelings. I looked at the garage door for a second and could see Bella trying to understand.

I tried to put things in terms she'd easily understand. "It's Rosalie's house." A hint of hurt seemed to flash through her eyes so I continued quickly, "Her brother Jasper's in my band." Ok, I'd actually said the phrase "my band" out loud and _liked _it. Semantics! Was it really important whose band it was? She waited. "We practice here."

The only reason I even considered bringing her here today was that no one was home. Jasper and Emmett were staying overnight in Seattle, Rosalie and Alice had planned a day of shopping, and Mr. and Mrs. Hale went to their lake cottage on most weekends.

The side door garage entrance was always open. And this was suddenly the one place I needed to be with Bella. Being this close to my safe haven gave me a boost of confidence and I led her in by the hand, clicking on the single overhead light. If I'd been a painter everything about the room would have been unacceptable. But alas, I'm a musician and the dimly lit space was exceptional. We both sat on the futon against the far wall, usually occupied by Alice and/or Rosalie during our practices. Both attended every practice religiously when we first formed the band, but since then their attendance waxed and waned. Something told me Bella wasn't the type of girl to lose interest so easily.

Her eyes studied everything, but she said nothing. It was just too quiet in there. I had always associated the space with the loud sounds we normally produced. Especially Emmett. He was lucky he'd learned to play well or we'd have to rent him out as a form of torture.

I hit "play" on the small CD player on a nearby shelf. I had no idea what'd be in there, but I hoped it wasn't something that could potentially get me into trouble. Marvin Gaye, for example, would not be ideal…To my relief it was an old Creedence Clearwater Revival album; although, the first track, "Susie Q" always sounded like a sex song to me, I was pretty sure Bella wouldn't think of that way.

"Tell me something I don't know about you."

She looked like she wanted to laugh, but didn't. "You don't know anything about me."

I ran a hand through my hair carelessly. "Then it should be easy to think of something." The crooked smile I had no control over came to life and I knew she noticed it.

"Well," it was obvious she was mentally scanning for just the 'right' fact, "my name's really Isabella. But no one calls me that. Literally no one." I couldn't tell if she liked or disliked this.

I don't know what made me say it. It was like hearing a stranger speak rather than words coming out of my own mouth. "Isabella." It was slow, deliberate, and husky. If I hadn't begun to read her reactions, I'd have worried about scaring her. My hand reached up to brush against her cheek. _Aw, hell. _The whole thing was starting to feel like an out-of-body experience.

She flushed and smiled at my touch, quickly changing the subject. "What about you, Mr. Cullen?" She emphasized the "mister" which sounded incredibly sexy despite the sheer innocence with which she spoke. "What's one thing I don't know about you?"

"You don't know how long I've waited for you." _What the fuck? Where did that come from?_ As surprising as it was to say aloud, it was true. And Isabella Swan most definitely knew it.

My face closer to hers than it'd ever been, I inhaled. The scent I love so much was barely there, like a memory. But she was heavenly nonetheless. I could hear her breath catch, feeling her heartbeat quicken as my hands rested on either side of her face.

I wanted to say something, something memorable. But just doing it would say it better than words ever could. I pressed my lips firmly against the plump, soft curves of hers. She had expected me, kissing me back insistently. I felt my lips instinctually part and hoped to god I hadn't audibly expressed the moan ricocheting back and forth in my head. The tip of her warm tongue traced along my lower lip before she pulled away.

Judging from her reaction to other scenarios, I'd expected her to look embarrassed, to be ashamed. But instead, she was flushed with contentment, relaxing her posture a bit as she reclined against the futon's sloped back.

"Play for me." She nodded in the direction of the equipment. I hated myself for leaving Opal at home.

Jasper's bass was in its usual spot, and an old electric guitar of his was dusty in a corner. He also had a beautiful acoustic guitar he played for fun, but we tended not to go acoustic during practices. It just didn't fit with the volume Emmett added to every song.

I picked up the sleek guitar and sat on the milk crate we used as a makeshift table during band "meetings" – code word for pig out sessions in which Emmett and Jasper competed to see who could eat (or drink, it was really interchangeable) the most before hurling into Mrs. Hale's rosebushes. Luckily Emmett usually won; my mother would have killed him if she ever found out he'd desecrated someone's garden like that.

Despite my love of playing, and my existence as a self-admitted music snob, I didn't always understand the intended meaning behind every song. I couldn't climb inside of the lyrics and see what the songwriter was thinking. But I'd always figured it didn't matter. It didn't matter what they'd intended it to mean, it mattered what it meant _to me_. If I could project what I felt, when I played maybe someone listening would get that feeling too. It's all I could ask for.

Which is exactly why deciding what to play was a new problem entirely. I didn't normally put any kind of thought into what song to play – it kind of just came out on its own. I strummed up and down clumsily. _Edward, calm down. You're better than this. _The desire to show off appeared momentarily, but was replaced by the desire to be real. Understanding this desire brought the song out as if it had been nestled somewhere inside all along.

I hadn't played the song in ages, specifically since the day Emmett forbade it, insisting he'd heard enough of my "depressing shit" through the walls of our house. I quit playing it then, not really because of what he'd said, but because I realized my intentions had been misunderstood. It wasn't depressing, it was – in my opinion – a confession, a metaphor. And now, thinking back to what she'd said back at her house– how she thought she wasn't good enough. It seemed right.

I'd felt the need to make a confession too, like Bella so bravely did before. But when speaking my words didn't always come out the right way. It wasn't easy to feed feelings into one side of the machine and twist them into sentences, phrases. I did the only thing I could think to do.

The slow tempo was exactly what I needed, urging my heart to follow suit. Watching her carefully, I noticed her eyes aimed low. She smiled, watching my hands. This song wasn't particularly difficult, it was easy in fact. But she seemed entranced nonetheless.

I sang softly, not trying to mimic the original singer, instead attempting to emphasize something entirely different, especially once I hit the chorus.

_Omaha, somewhere in middle America  
Get right to the heart of matters  
It's the heart that matters more_

_I think you better turn your ticket in  
And get your money back at the door_

I wasn't even brave enough to look at her while I said it; afraid my eyes would give away the extra hidden piece of myself I'd never shown anyone before. But at the same time, I needed her to know. _It's about me, Bella. You think you're not worthy of me, of my attention? You're so blind it's embarrassing. _I'm_ not worthy. Get out while you can. Ask for a refund, because you've most definitely gotten a raw deal…_

It was a surprise to hear her voice. "Edward – " My fingers never stopped playing, even though the song had officially ended. She hadn't said it like a question, but her eyes communicated everything her spoken word couldn't. They said: _I don't see you like you see yourself. You, my friend, are the proverbial pot looking to give the kettle hell. We're the same. __We're the same._

There were times when I questioned my intuition, my ability to pick up the signals others sent.. But I could read her so clearly in this instant, there was no question that we were actually much more alike than I'd ever considered. This realization seemed particularly important to me somehow – a game-changer of sorts. Perhaps this is what forced me to begin playing the first chords of a new song. And in a way it did force itself upon me; by the time I realized I was playing it, it was time to start singing.

I had heard this song performed acoustically once during a concert in Seattle and realized for the first time the value in slowing things down. To be honest, I'd always believed the original version to be a work of genius, but sometimes – genius or not – it made sense to make a change. It started to turn me on thinking of her watching my fingers caress the strings. If it was possible to enhance what I was doing for her benefit, I would have, but this wasn't a show. I needed everything about the moment to be entirely, 100% genuine.

I couldn't help closing my eyes as I got the chorus, usually sung loudly and filled with an upbeat desperation. My version was soft and slow: the musical equivalent of running my fingers across her soft cheek, touching her lips with my thumb.

_And I wonder…_

I wanted so badly to open my eyes and have hers waiting for me, but I wasn't brave enough to check just yet.

_If everything could ever feel this real forever_

_If anything could ever be this good again_

Saying the words did make me wonder those exact things. If what I felt for Bella was fleeting, I wasn't ready to know about it. I wanted to sink into this moment entirely, immerse myself, and drown myself if possible. Having to imagine another moment without her was unbearable. For a second, fear took hold of me, afraid that once I opened my eyes again she'd be gone. Like waking from a dream.

_The only thing I'll ever ask of you_

_You've got to promise not to stop when I say when_

My eyes opened violently, expecting the worst, unprepared for what was waiting.

* * *

BPOV

Hearing the deep tones in his voice sent a strange sensation through my body. I felt like pinching myself.

I didn't want to be sitting still, staring at him when he opened his eyes. There wasn't an easy way to communicate what listening to him did to me. I slowly paced around him, watching him from every angle. It was more than just his hands at work, his entire body was moving. His right foot steadily tapped a rhythm, his strong shoulders moving to accommodate his strumming hands. His head even moved as he sang, every word emitted with complete and utter conviction.

I was behind him when he stopped, his shoulders relaxing into a neutral position. He said nothing and I could tell his eyes were trying to process my absence. The muscles in his neck tensed, announcing an attempt to turn towards me. There weren't words for what I wanted to say, for what I was feeling. I was thankful, and reverent. I was infatuated, and impressed.

He froze, feeling my hot breath against his ear. "_You_ are incredible." Not being able to see me was obviously difficult for him and in my peripheral vision his lips seemed to twitch into the beginnings of a smile. He rested the bottom of the rounded guitar onto the floor, its neck upright in front him. Putting his weight onto it with one hand, he refrained from moving further.

Without having to face him it wasn't difficult to muster the confidence necessary to snake my arms around him, pressing my chest firmly against his back.

I could feel his jaw relax, preparing to speak. "Isabella – "

The spell was broken by a shrill sound from my pocket, my cell phone. _Great timing. I haven't gotten a phone call in days and someone picks _now_ to get in touch…_ As much as I wanted to just ignore it, I saw my dad's name on the screen and knew I had to answer.

I walked towards the window facing the Hales' backyard. "Uh, hi Dad."

"Bells? You okay? I thought you'd have been home by now." I'd forgotten that as far as he knew I'd been at Alice's all night. "I tried the house and you didn't answer."

"Yeah, I went home earlier. Just out for a little bit now."

He must have been distracted; he did not ask me to elaborate. "Well, as long as you're okay – Hey, listen – Lloyd's wife just went into labor and he was supposed to cover the late shift tonight. The man is a wreck…" I could hear my father yelling to someone in the room with him to 'hurry up and get out of there.' "I'm uh, gonna stay and cover this one, okay?"

I nodded, realizing after a moment that he couldn't see it. "Sure, Dad. Take it easy, ok? You'll be dead tired in the morning." My eyes shifted over my shoulder towards Edward, patiently sitting on the milk crate, obviously trying to be quiet.

We wrapped things up and I flipped my phone shut. Taking a deep breath I headed back to the futon, enjoying the view of his back against his thin shirt, his low-slung pants barely resting on his hips, and the worn brown belt attempting to keep them up. If he wasn't so incredibly beautiful, he would have been a complete mess.

Looking at him made me want to do things that brought that familiar rosiness across my pale cheeks. I couldn't stop picturing my fingers at his waist, tracing along his abdomen as I slowly lifted his t-shirt. I didn't know what he looked like under there beside the small hints of skin he showed when he made certain movements. I suddenly felt like a perv for having his abs so high on my visual radar that any flash of skin sent me into a tailspin…

If I thought my fantasizing was embarrassing, it was nothing compared to being fairly certain he knew what I was doing. I hadn't seen him look embarrassed before, shifting uncomfortably. It was nice to see that he too had cracks in the ever-perfect façade. Note to self: Next time the opportunity arises, try and do that whole "eye fucking" thing back to him. Wonder how he'll like them apples?

Who was I kidding? I was pretty damn sure I knew _exactly_ how he'd like them apples…

My thoughts were mercilessly distracted as Edward reached into his pocket, fishing out a very high-tech looking cell phone. Mine could have been the great-grandfather of his based on looks alone. He rubbed his temple, obviously reading a text message. "Emmett. They're on their way back and want to meet up to play tonight." He ran his hands through his hair again.

"That's a good thing, right?"

"Yeah, it is. I just," my eyes went to his throat as he swallowed – shifting up to his now present smile, "enjoyed having you to myself."

It hadn't occurred to me he'd want me at his practice. That he'd want anyone to know he spent any significant time with me at all. That's definitely what his words were implying, right? The revelation was _exciting_. My mind flashed quickly to Alice.

"Edward, what are we going to do about Alice?" I tried explaining my concerns about keeping my friendship from her separate from "everything else." _Nebulous enough for ya? _

"Plus," he added with certainty, "She'll rip both our heads off for being kept in the dark." _Give yourself a break. It's not like we planned this. It just…_happened_. _I couldn't picture Alice with any kind of violent streak, but it was easy to picture hurt on her delicate little face. And I didn't want to ever be responsible for that… ever.

He started again: "Why don't I take you home and then I'll see what I can do about my sister… we're actually due for a very," he cleared his throat, "_long_ conversation anyway." I didn't ask questions. Instead nodding against the fact that the last thing I wanted to do right now was go home.

Picking up my hand in his, he led me to the door. I couldn't help looking back over the room, a final attempt to absorb every detail (I'd most definitely want to remember _everything_ about today) before flipping off the light and closing the door behind us.

The ride to my house was quiet, but in a good way. He held my hand tightly, that sideways smile evident every time I glanced towards his face. I still couldn't help studying his hands, the one in mine of particular interest. The back of his hands were smooth and flawless while his fingers were much rougher. _All the guitar playing_. Feeling the rough touch of against the back of my hand made me start to wonder what they'd feel like in other places…

I realized we'd stopped and were in front of my house after a moment, his eyes waiting for me to break free of my trance. His smile was even more amazing laced with laughter. He shook his head before hopping out of the car, walking around to my side. _I know you like to play with me,_ I directed my silent pleas to the universe at large, _but I've never been more thankful for the moments of happiness you've afforded me today_.

Smiling, I took his rough hand again as he helped me from the car. The discrepancy between how he looked and how incredibly polite and kind he actually was made him even sexier. He didn't say anything now, but I couldn't help thinking back to the day he fixed my truck and called me "Ms. Swan"…_God! If he did it again now I think I'd melt…_

He pulled me along slightly behind him up to the front steps, gently placing his hand on my lower back as we ascended. The heat from beneath his hand shot through me like lightening and it took everything in me to resist expressing how his touch affected me.

We paused in front of the door and I turned to face him. He was still smiling, which only made the edges of my lips involuntarily curl up to match him. I couldn't quite look him in the eye – we were too close, too intimate and I didn't think I had it in me to return his gaze. Eyeing his lips, the curve of his lower lip in particular, I was caught off-guard by his free hand's touch along the side of my face. My eyelids heavily fluttered shut just as his lips met mine. They weren't gentle or soft as he'd been with me before. This time, they were firm pressing against me harder than I anticipated. His hand on my face cupped my jaw, holding my head steady as he transferred his mouth harder against me. I matched him move for move, wanting to give to him everything he was now giving to me. It would have been cliché to call the moment passionate, but it was. It would have been cliché to call it electrifying, but it was. And it would have been cliché to say I was falling in love with Edward Cullen, but I was.

I pulled away breathlessly, his eyes frantically gazing back at me attempting to read my signals.

I didn't make him wait. I was rolling my now-swollen bottom lip between my teeth as if trying to make a decision, but it was an act. The decision had already been made. It had been made the minute I hung up the phone with my dad earlier.

Allowing my eyes to stare directly back at his, I showed him my version of the sly crooked smile. "Wanna come inside?"

* * *

**Author's Note: I'm mean, very very mean. But you love it, don't you?? **

**Remember, your reviews are like a drug to me – Wait! I think I've heard that somewhere before… Seriously, I squeal like a little girl with every review and I answer them ALL. **

**L. **

**Other Songs Mentioned/Referenced: **

**Everybody Else – Meat Market** ("What's your number, little girl?")

**Creedence Clearwater Revival – Suzie Q**

**Counting Crows - Omaha**


	6. Hold Me

**Author's Note: If you're reading these words right now, I love you! Each and every one of you!**

**And since you've been a very patient group this past week I present you with my longest chapter yet. I hope you really enjoy this one! **

**Of course, everything **_**Twilight**_** belongs to SM… and this crazy little story is all mine. **

**Weezer – Hold Me**

**L.**

* * *

Chapter 6 – Hold Me

EPOV

It was sweet that she'd posed it as a question: "Wanna come inside?" Like I'd say no, or something.

I wanted to be inside of that house, alone with Bella Swan, more than I wanted air at that moment. I wanted to be in her space, taking in everything that was hers. I needed to be in her room, to breathe her scent, to see, for all intents and purposes, her most intimate of spaces. I felt like I needed to absorb, to experience, everything that makes her who she is.

Of course the momentary fantasy of being alone in her bedroom wasn't lost on me. It was less than a microsecond, but I'd already been able to picture the way I'd kiss her, firmly up against her bedroom door. The way my hands would trace along her hips, wanting her body tightly against mine. Sliding a hand up the back of her shirt to stroke what I could only imagine was the softest of spots…

_Shit. There was no fucking way I could go into that house_.

And I knew her eyes were waiting for me. Needing me to say something. I dropped her hand, against every urge in my body, and ran both my hands through my hair. "Bella – " I couldn't go on because I didn't even believe I was actually saying these words. Her brows furrowed, prepared for disappointment. "I want nothing more than come inside with you." I took a deep breath. "In fact, I've already played the whole thing out beyond the point of embarrassment…"

"But?" She knew where I was headed.

"But, I can't." I tried my best to convey everything I needed to say without words, but she wasn't Alice and honestly, this kind of communication didn't seem to be the kind of thing I could control if I wanted to. Kissing her forehead and leveling my eyes with hers, I tried to lighten the mood. "There's a conversation I have to have with a very small, very annoying person. I won't be able to enjoy my time with you until it's over with."

Her eyes softened and it was clear she understood it wasn't personal. In fact, amusement seemed to be creeping up into the corners of her mouth as she approached me.

I thought I'd die as I felt her hand slip into my front pocket slowly, her eyes still focused on mine but with the added bonus of a mischievous grin. I could feel her fingers through my pocket, the heat of her hand against my thigh. They gripped around what they'd sought to find, contentment washing across both of our faces as she removed her hand with a tight grasp on my cell phone. _Fuck. Me. Dodged a pretty large fucking bullet there… _

She typed her number into the keypad and dialed it, her phone ringing from deep within her pocket. "Call me later, ok?" I nodded like some kind of idiot, at a loss for words.

I'd expected her to just hand the phone back to me, but instead she slid it back into my front pocket. "I like to leave things how I found them." _God, this girl drives me _crazy!_ And you are so very wrong, Ms. Swan; you leave nothing, absolutely nothing the way you found it… _

My eyes followed her into the house, refusing to entertain the very real possibility that I could be inside with her right now. I exhaled completely once the front door closed behind her and began my own "walk of shame" back to my car.

I'd have to strategize a bit on the way home to keep the impending conversation with Alice as much under my control as was humanly possible. She would not let me off the hook on this one – although she rarely ever did.

* * *

I pulled in front of the house about twenty minutes later, with a plan in mind. Of course I knew the second I crossed the threshold that it was all out the window. Alice was nothing if not unpredictable and to even have a shot I'd have to be prepared for anything. Although, based on the past few days, I was pretty much there.

I found her in her room and went in without knocking. We both knew she'd been waiting for me.

Sitting down on her puffy comforter, I sunk in farther than I'd expected kind of like quicksand. It was her room's way of reminding me this was _not_ neutral territory – I was definitely at her mercy.

She turned around in her desk chair like a mob boss in one of those movies: pensive, lips held taught, eyes slanted taking me in. "Something you'd like to discuss?"

Taking in a deep breath, I exhaled very slowly. I've always been a master at buying myself a few extra moments before having to speak. When I finally did, it was a moment of genius – a beautiful thing.

"Uhh…" My loss for words reminded me that this whole thing with Bella Swan was bigger than I could have anticipated after knowing her for just a few days.

The point was not lost on Alice. Her ability to detect my feelings was exceptional – usually something really handy. Right now, it seemed treacherous to be such an open book. Her collected façade crumbled into that of a grinning fool, eyes alight with curiosity.

I brought both hands up to my face, trying to rub away the anxiety that had been building for this. "Alice, it's not what you think."

_Oh, you are _so_ cliché my friend… why not add "it's not you, it's me" while you're at it…_

"Au contraire," she began in her best Emmett voice, "I believe it is exactly what I think." She looked at my face with squinted eyes trying to read the accuracy of her assumption. After a moment she sat back again, smiling with satisfaction.

"Of course," it was as good a place to begin as any, "I can't know _exactly_ what you're thinking, but I'm pretty sure you're wrong on this one. Nothing happened. There is just something about this girl that drives me crazy."

"You know," a distant look came across her face, "you sound a lot like Emmett when he started sniffing around Rosalie. Wait, no he said 'This girl is crazy,' never mind!" She giggled dramatically, taking huge amusement in herself.

I had anticipated this, but in our entire lives I'd never found a combatant for this kind of hysteria. She cut her own laughter off with dead silence, eyes growing wide in my direction.

"Alice," I breathed deeply, "I'm trying to come clean, put everything on the table here. Can you please – "

She flew out of her seat, hands aimed at my face quickly clamping my lips together to stop me from talking. "Edward, shhhh! I think I've just had a revelation." I couldn't say anything, instead opting to roll my eyes in a dramatic, Alice-like fashion. "You are interested in Bella – _my friend_. And Emmett is dating Rosalie – _my friend_." She removed her hands from my face and sat beside me before theatrically throwing herself backward. "I'm pimping out all of my friends to my family members! Can't you see how sick that is?"

_Great_, now_ that she's got this idea in her head the whole thing becomes that much worse. _

I could only see the indentation made by her small frame in the lofty bedding from my angle, her features hidden below my line of sight. Rather than make eye contact, I spoke in her general direction. "Calm down, ok? Please. You're way overreacting." I cringed thinking that this could be the exactly wrong thing to have said. I watch enough TV and movies to know that girls do _not_ like to be told they need to calm down or that they're overreacting. I had been two for two.

Her head shot up with a glare beyond annoyance. "Oh am I? Really? Funny coming from someone benefiting from this whole twisted thing." I knew she didn't mean it. Really we should just ship her off to summer theatre, Broadway, or Hollywood because her knack for these over-the-top performances was unquestionable.

I patted her arm in my best attempt at a big-brotherly gesture. "Alice – " but I knew she wasn't listening. She sunk back into a fully horizontal position.

She remained reclined in her comforter, spread out like a child who'd grown tired mid-way through making a snow angel. I seemed to be at a loss for words. Usually I could come up with a rebound for these kinds of moments, prepared to lift her spirits and smooth things over simultaneously. Even when she was wrong, and not that she was _entirely_ wrong this time, it broke my heart to see her sad. Maybe it was the twin thing, but deep down I liked to think it bothered me because underneath it all I'm a decent guy.

Suddenly, it hit me.

"Alice," I did my best to invoke her tone, "I think I'm having a revelation too." I could see skepticism all over her face as she lifted her head, cocked in my direction. "Wait, wait. Bear with me here. I may have just figured this whole thing out." I was being melodramatic, and childish. But she and I always seemed to fall into this pattern. Her dramatic nature would inevitably rub off on me and my generally low-key demeanor would bring her down a few notches. On a good day, within minutes, we'd balance one another out and part ways again. On a bad day, things could really go haywire.

"Wow me, Cullen." She said, stoically.

I almost laughed at her response; it was eerie how much like me she could sound if she wanted to. But instead, I held it back and attempted to communicate things to her clearly._ Proceed with caution._ "Well it's no secret you've been itching for a piece of Jasper for months now." A wave of extreme offense washed over her, annoyed that I'd tossed her feelings into the ring so casually. Before she was able to formulate a cohesive sentence, I continued. "But think about it, Al, he's my friend, right?"

She lifted her head until she was able to see my face and froze, staying silent. I tried to get right to the point: "Apparently I'm pimping out my friends too." Her eyes widened again, this time looking sad, despondent.

_Definitely just made things worse – Abort! Abort! _

"What I mean is, it's just the way our group functions. We're pairing off because that's how it's supposed to be." I was being purposely vague and wondered if this was all stemming from the fact that she was the last of us to become "paired."

There was probably only one thing I could say to really break Alice from her funk. "And personally, I think you should just go for it with Jasper already. He'd be lucky to have you." It felt good to say the words and really mean them, although if she wasn't emotionally twisting my arm I'd have most definitely kept my mouth shut.

She gave me _the look_. The one that melted my heart each and every time. "Really?" She knew I meant what I said, but needed to hear it.

"Yeah, Al. I really mean it." She smiled causing me to smile in response. "I know this whole Bella thing kinda fell into my lap, but most people really have to work at it. And if you want to be with him – go and make it happen."

A calming wave seemed to wash over her before overflowing onto me. Moments like that were kind of cool in a creepy if-you-get-hurt-will-she-feel-it? kind of way. Rather than actually thanking me for my support, she did something even better – her way of letting me off the hook: "Ok, I'm all ears Edward. Tell me what happened with Bella."

Yeah, ok, so we share genetic material and for nine months we shared a uterus, but my sister is still fucking cool as hell when she wants to be.

"Alice, there was just something special about this girl from the first moment I saw her – I couldn't have explained it to you then and I honestly can't explain it to you now." I sighed, resting my weight against a wooden bedpost. "I didn't pounce on your friend, I was just surprised to find her here. I _may_ have accidentally kissed her wrist in the middle of the night…" It sounded even worse out loud.

She actually laughed out loud. "You _what_?"

_So_ don't want to explain that one…"Look, please just forget it. I just didn't want you to think she left because of you. She left because of me, and I promise not to let whatever the hell is happening mess up things with you guys."

Alice didn't question me, not even a little bit. This meant two things: One- she believed what I'd said and Two- the truth was indeed less graphic than what she'd been picturing, because she changed the track of conversation quickly.

"You know what this means, don't you?" Which of course I didn't and she knew it… "We've got to establish some ground rules." _Oh, jeez… Nothing I love more than beating a dead horse._

But really, what could I say? The woman could not be reasoned with; it was futile to try.

"Oh-_kay._ Um, wait. Rules for what?" It was true I sometimes feigned ignorance around the house, it kind of worked with my below-the-radar personality, but this time my question was legit.

"Well, I mean," she sounded exasperated, but I knew it was just her mouth struggling to keep up with her racing mind, "you're _interested_ in my friend and I'm somewhat interested in the closest thing you've got to a friend…" I threw a scowl at her, wondering why she had to add the dig in at this point of the conversation. "Soooo…I think ground rules are necessary."

She paused dramatically, eyes tilted up towards the ceiling as if in deep thought, "I mean you and me," she gestured with a quick hand in the space between us, "we're stuck together for life, but if we stir up trouble with one another's friends and things don't end well… well we could very seriously have World War three on our hands. And _that_ would really devastate me." _Guilt Trip!_ She reached out to affectionately pat my shoulder, her way of negating the "stuck together" comment.

_Alice Cullen, you are good. Very, very good._

I kicked back into her comfortable bed silently wondering why girl stuff was so much fluffier and more comfortable than the flat comforter across my own bed. Asking myself the question pretty much answered it: men just didn't know any better. I couldn't help but wondering if Bella's bed was this over-the-top. But from what I surmised of her already, I knew it wasn't. She seemed to be a minimalist of sorts, a contrast I thoroughly enjoyed.

I let my body weight sink into her blankets and finally responded, eyes aimed at the ceiling: "Alright then smarty pants, what did you have in mind?" My words were relaxed, really the first indicator that I myself had become comfortable with the direction things were headed. If this was the worst Alice could throw at me today, I'd be fine.

_Careful there buddy, those are famous last words. _

"Well first and foremost I think we both need to forfeit the 'automatic hate' rule." She said it like it was plain as the nose on her face, but I wanted a clear explanation before I agreed to anything.

Best to keep it simple: "Elaborate."

She flipped onto her stomach, turning to one side so she could aim her animated explanation directly at me. "Well like I was saying, about things ending badly. I mean normally families stick together when it comes to enemies, right? I'd think if one of us hates someone we should all get on that bandwagon." She took a longer-than necessary pause, allowing my mind time to catch up to her racing speech. "However, since this is a rather _unique_ set of circumstances, I propose that if you and Bella start something up and things end like the dropping of an Atom Bomb I shouldn't have to automatically hate her. I mean, it should be my choice, right?"

Partially because I couldn't imagine that happening and partially because I was just curious to see what else she had up her sleeve, I nodded in agreement.

"Great. And of course, in the event something got stirred up with Jasper," she couldn't help smiling to herself as she spoke, "You wouldn't have to hate him if things went sour." I thought she'd drop it there, but she cleverly added, "Unless you want to." _Nice._

Alright, one down. Maybe there wasn't much left to go. "Fair enough. What else you got?"

Alice suddenly looked impatient and in a flash of womanly annoyance I just didn't understand, she threw her words back at me. "You know you should be thinking of things too. I mean it doesn't affect just me." My mind suddenly drifted to that movie they show at Christmastime with the kid who wanted the gun. His brother avoided bullies by lying in the snow like a slug, it was his only defense. I suddenly understood that feeling _completely_. I remained still, refusing to move a muscle, until she spoke again.

"We should probably make a rule about visits too. I mean if Bella comes over to spend time with me, you shouldn't swoop in and usurp her attention or anything…" She was obviously picturing that things went that way last time Bella was in the house, and I didn't have the energy to clarify.

"Alright that's fair, but it works both ways. She's here with me, you have to back off."

"Unless…" of course Alice would think of an exception to something that was seemingly simple.

Sensing these "rules" were about to get more complex than necessary, I preempted things. "Let's just play it by ear ok? I'm not worried about that one." She seemed to accept my response, returning her head down across her arms.

We didn't add too many things to Alice's "ground rules" list which mostly revolved around ensuring that our individual relationships remained separate. I surprised even myself when I was the one to add a final rule to the list. "Alice, I'll always put you first. But, just try not to break his heart ok?"

Her face lit up, most likely from my mention of them as a potential couple. Her smile shifted away from glee and into warmth and sincerity. "That's a pretty good rule, for an amateur. Goes for you too, ok?"

I closed my eyes and smiled, hand resting across my stomach, gently drifting off. _Nothing to worry about, Alice. Nothing to worry about. _

* * *

My cell phone was set louder than I remembered, startling me from a peaceful sleep. I was alone in Alice's room, suddenly hoping I hadn't been drooling all over her covers. Not only would she be completely disgusted, but I couldn't even cover my tracks – judging from the size of the quilted monstrosity I doubted it'd fit in the washer. It didn't take much convincing to give up, considering it was dark and by the time she'd notice anything tomorrow she'd think it was her. _Yeah, guys are completely gross…_

_Holy Shit! It's _dark_ outside! _I ran my fingers through my hair twice and rubbed my eyes before consulting my phone to see whose call I'd missed. _Fuck_. My thumb hit the appropriate button and I dialed Jasper back knowing they'd probably been home for a while and were wondering where I was. I was never late, especially not to band practice. I'm sure Jasper had images of me dead in a gutter someplace while, if Rosalie was within sight, Emmett probably didn't know the difference.

I didn't give him a chance to speak. "Don't fucking hate me, ok? I fell asleep. I'll be right there. And I'm," I coughed a phony cough, not entirely sure why… "bringing someone along, ok?" Although I hadn't specifically asked Bella, I figured she wouldn't shoot me down.

Jasper laughed in the upbeat way he always did, the kid was fucking fantastic like that. "Yeah, sure. Bring a whole fucking parade, I don't care. Just head over, dude. We've got something lined up next Friday and we needs to get crackin'." I fucking hated when he added an extra 's' onto words like that… what was that about?

"On my way."

* * *

BPOV

He called to ask if I was interested in coming with him to his practice, but he had to know it was a formality. I'd have said yes if he'd called and asked me to jump off a cliff with him.

It hit me immediately after hanging up that this would be my first time really spending time with Jasper and the last impression Emmett had of me was one of a stuttering idiot. Impressing them, or at least falling into their good graces, was high on my priority list. I wasn't entirely sure how it worked with groups of guys, but with girls one "thumbs down" from a well respected friend could really end things in a hurry…

I could hear Alice's voice in my head warning me to look good, but not too good. The last thing I'd want is to look like I'm trying too hard. When I knew he'd be pulling up any second I settled on my favorite pair of jeans and a dark blue tank with a dark blue sweater pulled over. I didn't normally dress in layers, but around Edward my temperature could suddenly fluctuate.

My hair actually looked decent and I sent a "thank you" out to God, or Mother Nature, or the Universe – really all of the above – for keeping the humidity low today. Good hair always gave me a little boost. I sprayed the air a few times and walked through it, breathing in my favorite smell. They'd discontinued the scent and I'd had to hoard my remaining supply, but wearing an extra little bit when I knew I'd be seeing him was worth every drop.

Eyeliner? Check! Lip-gloss? Check! Heart on my sleeve? Oh yes, a big fat check goes next to that one too…

A compulsive glance out the window found his car waiting for me in the driveway. I rushed to the front door, not wanting to keep him waiting, but when I threw it open he was standing there – closed fist prepared to knock. This boy never ceases to amaze me.

He was obviously surprised to see me so suddenly, but his expression quickly melted into the crooked smile that completed his beautiful face. "Hey." He took my coat from my arm and helped me put it on, leading me towards his car by the hand. "I'm really glad you wanted to come." I was pretty sure he'd emphasized the word 'really' and wondered if he'd meant to.

I was pleased to see Alice waving from the back seat; I'd been afraid to talk to her since I left her house unexpectedly. Apparently, in addition to his many other talents Edward was also proficient at smoothing over miffed teenage girls.

The ride over to the Hales' was pretty quiet other than the songs on the radio. Although I'd recognized a few I couldn't list any of them – my mind was just too busy. Alice and Edward had obviously had the discussion Edward alluded to earlier and, I'm guessing, had nothing left to say at this point. Me on the other hand, I had a lot to say. Things to Alice, things to Edward, but I just couldn't do it while we were all together. I'd have to learn the boundaries of this twisted love/friendship/sibling triangle as we went along…

We pulled in front and Alice glided lithely through the side door before I was even finished unbuckling my seatbelt.

Edward came around to open my door. "Don't mind her," he motioned a hand in the direction of the house, "she just gets excited when we're coming over here."

I was debating whether or not to ask about how things went earlier, but there really was no good way to ask about a conversation that was awkward to begin with. Thankfully he volunteered the information. "She and I had a long talk when I got home before. It was better than I expected actually. Mostly filled with a lot of Alice just being Alice, and now things are totally fine. Don't worry." He searched my eyes for acknowledgement and to be sure I believed what he said. "We worked it all out – Although I may have created a monster."

I tried that whole raised-eyebrow thing I'd seen him do a few times now, and it must have looked convincing since it prompted him to continue. "The conversation kind of drifted towards her completely obvious feelings for Jasper and I _may_ have encouraged her to pursue them."

"It's sweet you want her to be happy." I accepted his hand and followed his lead.

"Well sure, making her happy is a bonus. What I really wanted was her off my case. And let me tell you," he gave my hand a squeeze as we walked into the crowded garage to see Alice flirtatiously touching Jasper's arm, "it worked like a charm."

Since Jasper was the only one I hadn't actually met, Edward led me over to him. "Hey, uh Jasper? This is Bella." I stuck my hand forward formally before realizing this wasn't _that_ kind of introduction. I recovered by picking an imaginary piece of lint off of Alice's dress.

"It's really nice to meet you." _There. Keep it simple. _

He smiled genuinely and I could see many of the traits Alice had painstakingly detailed to me over lunch during the last week. "Hey, Bella. Welcome to the dungeon." His charm was undeniable as he gestured around the room and I tried to catch Alice's eye to nod my approval – but she was too busy wrapped up in his every word.

"Dude!" Emmett's loud voice called out, reminding us all of his presence. "I told you not to call it that, ok? Sounds like some kind of Dungeons and Dragons shit – and I do _not_ want to be associated with that!"

I was thankful no one glorified his statement with a response.

Emmett got up from his spot beside Rosalie on the futon and strode over to us, using one hand to smack Jasper on the chest. "Dude, you tell him yet?" He threw a nod in Edward's direction indicating that he was the "him" in question.

Edward casually draped an arm over my shoulder, using his other hand to rub the space between his eyes. "Alright, _this_ can't be good. Hit me with it." Alice stared at her brothers with squinted eyes as if trying to anticipate their exchange. I'd seen her try this before, and usually within a second or two she was back to normal and seemingly content with what she'd determined. Now the squinting seemed to go on and on.

"Well," Emmett started walking as he spoke, chest puffed out in an obvious show of pride. "Your friend Jasper here decided to make a little wager while we were in Seattle." I could see Alice's face change, worried the details of said wager would be something disturbing to her idealized Jasper image. I started imagining slutty women and drunken exploits, issuing a silent plea that things wouldn't be that bad.

Edward was growing impatient. I could feel his hand across my left shoulder tighten before he spoke again. "Emmett, please. Enough with the dramatics. What are you talking about?"

"Quarters." He smiled the adorably childlike smile I remembered from the last time I saw him. I shifted my glance around to the others and determined I wasn't alone; no one, other than Jasper who had been there for the action, seemed to register what he was getting at.

From the corner of my eye I saw Edward shift his attention to Jasper to get the full story. He, in turn, opened his mouth to explain, but Emmett cut him off – obviously wanting to deliver the news in just the right way. "Mr. Hale over here decides to challenge _me_, of all people, to a little game of quarters in the back corner of The Hole. And anyone who knows anything knows that besides shoving people and drumming, quarters is my _calling_." He could sense that the natives were growing restless so he rushed to summarize: "And despite my warning – and I did warn you, didn't I, buddy? - this asshole not only continues to bust my balls, but ups the ante! So, Edward," he turned his full attention to his younger brother, "you can direct your inevitable griping about the setlist for Friday towards Jasper."

I could see it took Edward a second to put it all together, but I seemed to get it instantly: Jasper had wagered the right to make up their next setlist and Emmett had won, fair and square. We all held our breath waiting for his reaction.

Alice did her squinting thing again, but didn't have a chance for things to even register before laughter broke out across his face from someplace deep in his chest. "You know what," he looked around at all of us, "I'm a good sport. This thing is supposed to be about having some fucking fun anyway, right?" He took his arm from around my shoulder and shrugged out of his jacket. "Let's see what you've got in mind, Em." He picked up his guitar case to retrieve the beautiful instrument.

In that instant, Jasper had pulled me aside by the arm – hushing his voice and bending down so as not to be heard. "Whatever you're doing to him, keep it up!" He gave a wink in my direction before heading around my other side towards his bass. _Oh, Jasper – you silly boy – I'm just getting started!_

I sat with Rosalie on the old futon, Alice perched on the milk crate eyes fixated on the guys. It seemed right for her to be the one over there, maybe it was a Cullen thing.

The boys were having some huddle that reminded me of ballplayers meeting on the pitcher's mound. I'd always wondered if they really were having serious baseball conversations or if they needed an excuse to shoot the shit for a few minutes. If I was even contemplating wondering something similar about this group, there wouldn't have been time.

Emmett's booming voice called out in our direction. "All right babe, this one's for you." Rosalie looked excited, in her own lack-of-any-real-expression way, and cocked an ear into the air to show she was paying attention.

Before they started playing I tugged on Alice's sleeve, "Alice, do they know how to play _everything_ off the top of their heads?"

She did the crooked-smile thing and I was almost jealous that she shared something so fabulous with him, "Yeah, it's honestly amazing. Even Emmett! New songs too – they listen to one a few times and know it." She mirrored me and touched my arm back, "they're the real deal. And I'm not just saying that because I'm related to two-thirds of the band and in love with the rest!" Then, in true Alice fashion she doubled over herself in giggles, catching the attention of no one but me.

The sound of her was immediately drowned out by their playing, and while every fiber in my being tried to focus entirely on Edward – they were so good together it was hard not to occasionally notice what the others were doing. Especially when Jasper began to sing:

_Are you gonna take me home tonight?  
__Ah, down beside that red firelight  
__Are you gonna let it all hang out?  
__Fat bottomed girls  
__You make the rockin' world go round_

Alice and I slowly turned our heads towards Rosalie, anxious to see how a person reacts to having "Fat Bottomed Girls" dedicated in her honor. Emmett obviously knew her well, because she took the whole thing in stride. She shifted on the futon, looking back over her shoulder in an attempt to check herself out. "Well, it sure as hell isn't fat, but if anyone's ass was worthy of a song dedication…" She didn't finish her thought – we got the point.

There weren't words to describe how impressive they really were. And they looked like they were genuinely having a great time. Even Edward, who was, by far, the most serious of the group. He and Jasper alternated verses, sometimes singing over one another by accident. It was fun being behind the scenes, seeing how it all comes together. They'd talk about what they were doing while they were doing it, usually Edward shouting direction to the others.

Alice turned back, cupping a small hand to her mouth to better direct the sound towards me. "His ear is very good. He could detect a small imperfection from across a football field. Of course, his direction makes everything sound perfect – but drives the other two crazy. But, you know," she turned to look at me wide-eyed, "he _is_ used to being around me – and perfection can be contagious." I simply love Alice Cullen.

All the talk about perfection got my self-conscious meter going and I wondered how someone so entirely wrapped up in perfecting things could possibly find interest in someone like me. I watched him play, switching my attention between his hands and his mouth. When he sings his eyes close tightly on the big notes. Watching him do this excited me – _he was just so incredibly sexy._ For a majority of the time his eyes were open and he seemed to be watching me. It took me a while to catch on, but I began to notice that every time my gaze lifted to his face, his eyes were waiting. Ahh, he was sending a message: _You're the only one in the room. _

Ok, I couldn't verify that message, but he made me feel that way with every passing note.

It was obvious I wasn't used to the whole "band practice" scene when I, singularly, applauded once the song was over. My cheeks flushed red as I realized what I was doing, but Edward's grin seemed to alleviate some of the embarrassment.

He breathed into the mic, "Uh, it appears we have a fan." I momentarily wondered if that was his "phone sex" voice, before mentally slapping myself. _Bella Swan, who are you these days?_ Oh, I'll tell you who I am – as soon as I figure it out.

The boys went back to conferring over the songs they'd be trying out and the three of us fell back into conversation. Well, really it was the two of them – Rosalie must have been on a reconnaissance mission or something since she was talking a mile a minute to update Alice on Jasper-related things. I found it amusing that Rosalie was keeping tabs on her own brother for her friend. _Although…_I couldn't help my wandering mind, but quickly forced it to a halt. I promised myself then and there to never put Alice in that position.

She sighed loudly bringing me back to the present, leaning her elbows forward onto her knees, "I live such a sheltered life in that estrogen fueled hellhole." She eyed me with a look of thanks. "If it hadn't been for this one, I'd be headed for the loony bin for sure." It really didn't matter what she was saying, her style of storytelling, or direction giving, or placing a lunch order in school was simply entertaining.

"Alice," I began confidently, "I wouldn't have made it through that first day without you. At least we've got each other." And it was true, making friends was always a challenge and it was wonderfully convenient that, between Alice and Edward, I kind of had a ready-made set of friends waiting for me. Definitely took some of the pressure off.

Something Jasper said caused a drumstick to be flung in his direction and a late call of "heads up!" from Alice. "Yeah," she said to everyone, although obviously meant for me, "you've gotta watch out for projectiles of all kinds around here. Last time Emmett practically threw the whole drum set." He grimaced in her direction, throwing the other drumstick with the intention of missing her. There must be a hidden supply back there since in the blink of an eye another set was in his hand, ready to begin.

He started to pound loudly on the cymbals in rapid succession which must have sounded like something to Edward who quickly joined in. Once Edward started it actually sounded like a song, a familiar song. Jasper recognized it quickly and the three broke out into an impromptu performance of "My Generation," which seemed to suit Emmett just fine since the drum parts were all extremely loud.

Edward sang lead with Jasper promptly jumping in for backup. It was hard to sit still and act as blasé as Rosalie and Alice who practically, no make that literally, live with this all the time. To me it was still fresh and exciting.

All three shouted the line "I hope I die before I get old" and I couldn't resist laughing out loud. The friendly competition between them made me happy just to bear witness, not quite on the inside just yet. For the first time I saw the potential for myself as part of the group and, with this in mind, caught Edward's eye during one of the short guitar solos. They say the eyes are the gateway to the soul, and from looking at him I could confirm that Edward Cullen was definitely the gateway to things I've yet to imagine.

Turns out Emmett's song picking plan was two-fold. His first criterion was definitely, _definitely_ that each song had to revolve around big drum arrangements. And who could blame him? He was good at what he did. My only complaint would have been the headache that was beginning to form, but I figured I'd adjust at some point as the others all seemed to. The second was picking songs with a distinctly Emmett outlook on life. They went through "Hot for Teacher;" "Won't Get Fooled Again" (which I suspect was partially aimed at Jasper's big quarters defeat); and my favorite of the night, Edward's breathy voice doing an awesome "Radar Love."

I recognized it before he even opened his mouth and was anticipating the sound of him singing the opening. Playing seemed to really fuel him, his eye contact growing in intensity with each song – holding my gaze for longer and longer at a time. It was a very personal interaction considering we were in a room filled with other people. As he started to sing, his eyes ignited with something sexy, something burning, smoldering.

_I've been drivin' all night, my hands wet on the wheel  
There's a voice in my head that drives my heel  
It's my baby callin', says "I need you here"  
And it's a half past four and I'm shiftin' gear_

_  
When she is lonely and the longing gets too much  
She sends a cable comin' in from above  
Don't need no phone at all_

_  
We've got a thing that's called Radar Love  
We've got a wave in the air, Radar Love_

I was fairly confident it wasn't about the lyrics, wasn't really about the song. That the boy was actually trying to kill me. Ok, I know he wasn't trying to kill me, but those sex eyes brought out the animalistic urges I'd thought I'd been born without. If there was even a chance of getting away with it unscathed I would have climbed over his amp and shoved my tongue down this throat. Ok, I'm chicken shit and would never do that – especially not with witnesses – but the wanting was almost more than I could handle.

* * *

Things broke up pretty soon after they ended the song and we all headed for the door at the same time.

I was surprised when Alice headed out to the car with Emmett and wondered if Edward had arranged to be alone with me on the way home. I smiled at her and waved, she quickly looked between Edward and me before winking and climbing up into the jeep.

OK, so apparently if he hadn't thought it out, she definitely did. I wouldn't have minded her company at all, but was grateful to have him to myself once again. Seeing him play, up there doing what he does best, seemed to ignite my interest all over again.

He slipped his ipod out of the glove compartment and plugged it in, encouraging me to select something. From what I could tell he was relinquishing major control with this gesture. And he really didn't know what my musical tastes were – at all. I could have been big into country, or folksy _Sound of Music_ kind of stuff… but lucky for him I was much less interesting than that.

The sheer abundance of selection was not only impressive, but overwhelming. I didn't recognize about half of the bands listed, and mentally attempted to discern which of the bands I did know would be appropriate. I had gotten down to towards the end of the alphabet and stopped at Queen. Hearing the band play the Queen song earlier must have piqued my interest, examining the tracks on the Greatest Hits album. I was temped to play "Fat Bottomed Girls" again just to relive how wonderful it had been to see him in his natural habitat. Images of Rosalie and her perfect body flashed through my head and I opted to keep looking.

_He's got thousands of songs, just pick already! _I continued down the alphabet, now with something specific in mind. It was no surprise he had it – he had everything. My plan was to immediately start talking once I hit "play" so he couldn't spend too much time analyzing my decision.

A smile spread across his face – apparently he'd recognized my pick from the first note.

_I am terrified of all things.  
Frightened of the dark.  
I am.  
You are taller than a mountain.  
Deeper than the sea.  
You are._

I wasn't sure if he was pleased or entertained, so I proceeded with Plan A. "Thanks so much for bringing me tonight, Edward," I felt heat rush to my face as I said his name, "I love watching you play."

His hand slid from the wheel and easily found mine. "Well, I won't lie – it was the best practice we've ever had. I think it was because I was," he exhaled slowly, "inspired."

I squeezed his hand without meaning to, and he must have considered it a prompt to go on. "I'll never force you to come, but you're always welcome." I was ecstatic to hear him refer to our future so definitively. "But I hope one of these days to see what _you_ love to do. It would really interest me."

His words caused a panic in me – he was expecting me to have a hobby, an interest, a passion. And I'm pretty sure I struck out on all three counts.

I was thankful he changed the subject. "What made you pick this?" He questioned, turning up the volume slightly.

I was downright flushed but it was dark and I'm sure he couldn't tell. "Just seemed right."

He smiled that wonderfully lopsided smile and kept driving. We didn't rush to fill the lull – instead we just listened.

_Hold me.  
Hold me.  
Take me with you 'cause I'm lonely._

I am...  
I am...  
Cold.

Hold Me.

I didn't change the album as we drove, feeling comfortable with the tone the Weezer songs seemed to set. The best way to classify them was "non-threatening." It helped me save up my anxiety for the moment we pulled into my driveway. I usually tried to painstakingly plan things out ahead of time, but I had no plan, no intentions, no expectations. And having nothing ahead of me certainly seemed to add weight to my shoulders.

I was getting used to him opening my door and realized why this had been so popular at one point. I mean, I'm rah-rah for women's rights and believe in equality, but it's awfully nice to be taken care of once in a while.

Especially when Edward Cullen was the one taking care.

We were back at my door before I knew it, and I was beginning to get a case of déjà vu. Last time we were standing here I had invited Edward into my empty house, and he declined. Right now I was afraid to open my mouth at all.

He confidently reached up to cup my cheek in his hand, his thumb gently rubbing the spot next to my eye trailing down along my jaw line. "Edward –" but I didn't get to finish my thought. His mouth, firmly pressed to mine, drove out every question, every insecurity, and every bit of rational thinking. The heat of his mouth seemed to draw the heat back to my face, igniting a growing warmth in the pit of my stomach. I thought for sure I'd ask him in again, as soon as my mouth was free. And _that_ would be up to him because I wasn't ready to stop anytime soon.

His lips pulled away slightly, "Can I come in?"

_Oh. My. God. Trying to kill me…_

My inner voice was screaming "hell yes!" but I didn't want to seem quite so eager. I twisted the knob behind me, gently pushing the door open.

"I don't know. Can you?" Ok, so that means nothing, but I used my breathiest voice to perfect the delivery. I walked in through the doorway, his hand tightly clasped in mine. Looking over my shoulder, I threw him a confident smile, in sharp contrast to the swarm of butterflies furiously pounding against my stomach.

He swallowed once and returned the smile, following me into the house and closing the door behind him.

* * *

**Author's Note: Ok, I know I'm a real tease lately – and I'm sorry for doing it – but hang in there and I promise to make it worth your while! I mean, the boy's already inside and that's most definitely the first step…**

**Your reviews are amazing – and downright motivational! I reply to each and every one so please drop me a line and share your thoughts. **

**L. **

**Other Songs:  
****Queen – Fat Bottomed Girls  
****The Who – My Generation  
****Van Halen – Hot for Teacher  
****The Who – Won't Get Fooled Again  
****Golden Earring – Radar Love **


	7. Whatever It Is

**Author's Note: Ok, not the song for this chapter, but have I told you lately that I love you? I'm amazed each week at how many of you are rooting for me and cheering me on! You guys are amazing and I want to thank you (yet again) for reading and reviewing! **

**I owe special thanks to ****xsecretxkeeperx**** for being my own personal cheerleader and promotions department rolled into one! You rock! Also, big, BIG thanks to OliveJuiceEdward and amymorgan for doing your part to spread the word. I'm assuming every new reader I get is all thanks to you guys! **

**I injured my eye stupidly yesterday so more than half of this was typed with one eye closed. I love you guys THAT much! **

**I hope you enjoy!**

**L. **

**Of course, everything **_**Twilight**_** belongs to SM… and this little story is all mine. **

**Ben Lee – Whatever It Is  
**(Odds are you may not know this one, but go on youtube and look it up because it's an incredible song and completely fits the mood of this chapter. I strongly urge you to listen while you read – it only enhanced things for me.)

* * *

Chapter 7 – Whatever It Is

_Fuck._

_Ok, breathe…Breathe…BREATHE! _

I was embarrassed by the exhaling _whoosh_ leaving my lungs as I stood in the entryway of Bella Swan's house, my eyes staring right up the staircase. Yep, I was definitely inside. And yep, neither one of us had a clue what we were doing. I stared at her face, a few feet away from me as our clasped hands remained outstretched in the space between us. A sideways glance and smile from her direction puzzled me. Okay… maybe only one of us had no clue what we were doing.

She held onto my hand tightly, tugging on my arm as she gave me the five-cent tour. "Okay…" going past rooms, "kitchen…living room… uh, laundry…" she walked slowly but seemed to rush me nonetheless. I couldn't absorb anything at her pace. To do it correctly I'd walk around each room, looking at the pictures, the knickknacks, the details of every space. It all belonged to her and I wanted to figure out how I fit into it all too.

I couldn't describe the color of the kitchen or one picture hanging on the wall, and before I knew it we were back in front of the staircase. She cocked her head to one side and stared at me again through a sideways glance. "Did you want to see upstairs too?"

_Was this a trick question?_ "Um…well," she squeezed my hand, encouraging me to continue, "I haven't seen a bathroom yet – might come in handy."

_Fuuuccckkk. _I had listened to Alice and Rosalie watch that ridiculous _Dirty Dancing _crap enough times that I actually invoked it for a moment. I felt just like that fucking girl who tells Patrick Swayze she was there because she "carried a watermelon." Fuck, yeah I'd love to go upstairs so I can set down this fucking watermelon I'm carrying….

She laughed in my direction which seemed to ease the anxiety all around, leading me up the stairs by the hand.

We stopped in front of a darkened doorway, staring into the seemingly nonexistent space. She glanced into my eyes, holding the gaze for a moment longer than I'd anticipated, and turned toward the room. She squeezed my hand, her thumb innocently stroking the back of it to ease my nerves. I could see her biting her lower lip in my periphery.

She pulled me closer, reaching into the room with one arm, groping for the light switch with a placid smile tight across her face. With a "click" the room illuminated and she smiled at me, full-on. "Just in case you need it." Her free hand gestured into the grey-tiled bathroom like a showcase model.

I nodded, feeling heat rush to my face. I _totally_ deserved that one.

The sound of her voice brought me back to the moment. "As long as we're up here… might as well continue." She led me past Chief Swan's door, but it was almost entirely shut and I didn't really need a permanent image of his sleeping situation. I rationalized that it might undermine his authority if I was able to visualize him in bed.

We walked past a rounded window in the center of the hallway with a niche carved out for small padded bench. It looked like a nice spot to sit, read a book, play Opal… especially in this house where things were just so exceptionally quiet. My house, on the other hand, was like living in an airport where comings and goings could only be approximated and often resulted in loud, angry discussions from tired and irritable people. Ok, so maybe that was melodramatic - but when Alice isn't around someone has to do it…

The small window allowed a perfect view of the clear night sky, complete with a sprinkling of stars. If it wasn't happening in real time I'd have doubted it – it looked fake, contrived, cliché even. I supposed, cliché or not, it made sense to be standing with Bella and seeing stars.

She continued to lead me, and I let her. Completely submissive to her wants. It was obvious there was only one room left to be seen and I swore I could feel her pulse quicken as her wrist pressed into my hand. She began casually, "So…" flipping on the switch and illuminating a small lamp by the desk, "this is it."

Her room was exactly what I pictured. It was simple, minimal, and completely mirrored everything I currently knew about Isabella Swan.

Wanting to look at everything closer drove me into the room, forcing me to push aside the thoughts associated with my presence in her bedroom. She scrambled to push the covers up into a presentable imitation of a made bed and scooped up a pile of clothes from the corner, shoving them into the closet hamper. It calmed me to know she seemed nervous too, or, if not nervous, aware of the fact that having me here was a big deal for us both.

The dim lighting casted a dramatic shadow across her face like one of those old film noir movies. All that was missing was a burning cigarette and a man in a fedora. As ridiculous as the whole genre was, the films were always sexy, seductive. Seeing her like that was a turn on and I couldn't control how badly I needed to kiss her. I wanted to break the tension by finally addressing the 500 lb. gorilla in the room.

Rather than try and fail with words, I just did it. She met me halfway, her warm, soft lips pressing into mine like magnets drawn together. I tried to be gentle, but the sheer wanting I felt forced my mouth to push against her with obvious intensity and desire. The feeling was so overwhelming that a sense of relief washed over me as she pulled away.

Her swollen, puffy lips smiled and she licked them quickly. "Hold that thought, ok? I'll be right back." Slipping through the doorway, she was gone before I registered she'd said anything.

Being alone with my thoughts wasn't really safe right now, my struggle against the most graphic of images was weakening… instead my eyes narrowed in on the small stereo resting on her nightstand and I climbed into my comfort zone. I walked around her bed, sitting on it and looking around for the seemingly-absent corresponding music. My superficial hunt turned up empty for CDs or an ipod – there didn't appear to be much of a selection around here and lord knows I wasn't going to ask her. I could see through the clear window in the top of the player there was something loaded inside.

I hit play and sat nervously, wrapped up in the excitement of decoding the "real" Bella Swan based on her musical tastes. I was practically like a fortune teller in that way. With my elbows resting against my knees, I dropped my head into my hands, closing my eyes and listening. The gentle strumming at the beginning of the song was familiar in the way a smell could sometimes be familiar although you still can't quite name it.

_are you changing?  
do you know it?  
do you feel it?  
do you know it?  
but you're waiting  
while you're waiting  
why are you waiting?  
just do it - whatever it is_

Ben Lee. His name came to me as soon as I heard his voice, laced with his ever-present Australian accent. This was unexpected, yet not a surprising pick in actuality. It seemed to indicate that Bella was both pure and innocent, two things I'd known from day one.

I couldn't resist pacing her room, examining everything with the interest of an archeologist on a dig –uncovering the artifacts of a previously unknown culture. From across the room I caught sight of a tall, cylindrical bottle on her dresser, filled with a pale blue liquid. It had to hold the secret to _that scent_, the room was filled with it. I held in every breath wanting to absorb as much of it as possible – not because it simply smelled like heaven, but because it smelled like _her_ and I couldn't get enough.

She snuck back into the room without making a sound. Taking a step to examine the bottle, I felt her arm grab my hand, pulling me back. I turned, finding her much closer than I'd expected.

_they might tell you  
yeah they'll tell you that you shouldn't  
but do it - whatever it is  
go do it - whatever it is  
just do it - whatever it is_

I felt her warm breath against my throat and remembered her instructions to "hold that thought." I was definitely ready to pick up where we'd left off and every bit of her seemed to radiate that she too was ready. My hand rose beneath her chin, tilting her face upward.

Her eyes pled with me, and damn if she'd ever have to ask me twice for anything… My lips pressed into hers harder than I planned, but it felt right. My hands seemed to have a mind of their own, resting comfortably on her hips. She pushed her soft lips back against mine, slowly parting them – her warm, wet tongue sliding along my lower lip practically in slow motion. I wanted so much to quiet my mind, to think of nothing but the moment, how it felt to be holding her, touching her, tasting her… but everything in my head was just too loud. Forcefully arguing with myself on what I wanted to be doing versus what I should be doing.

_it's so quiet, it's so quiet, it's so quiet_

_and you're dreaming, and you're dreaming, and you're dreaming_

_i turn to you and say  
"awake is the new sleep"  
so wake up  
and do it - whatever it is  
just do it - whatever it is_

Her hot palms came to rest on the back of my neck, pulling my face closer to hers still – as if it were possible. Every signal she sent indicated she wanted this, wanted me at least partially as much as I wanted her – although I couldn't articulate with any words I knew exactly how much that really was.

As she pulled my neck forward, my whole body followed until I had inched her up against the wall. I knew once we'd hit it since the entire weight of my body was suddenly pressed into every inch of her. It was like an out of body experience. I could feel my hands tracing along her waist, slowly sliding beneath the back of her shirt. I had fantasized of touching this spot, not necessarily in a sexual way – just to make contact, to feel her, in a very private place. My fingertips glided along the smooth softness of her back, slowly working up until I could feel the slick fabric of her bra beneath my rough fingers.

In the tiniest of voices a practically invisible moan seemed to slip past her lips, directly into my now open mouth.

_Holy Shit_.

This moment had suddenly topped any other in my life, but at the same time I was embarrassed to be pressed into her so intensely. Perhaps I was slightly concerned about the more obvious effect she was beginning to have on me.

_I might fucking hate myself for this, but I've got to stop._ Bella Swan deserved better than to be groped senselessly up against her bedroom wall. Just thinking the words affected me unbelievably.

Perhaps sensing my hesitation, she suddenly pulled her face away from mine, breathing heavily against my neck, her hold on me still vice tight. I could feel her heart pounding against my chest and backed up enough to give her some breathing room.

"Bella…I –" she drew her finger to my lips, silencing me. I was thankful for her abrupt action since I had no fucking clue how I was going to finish that sentence.

She leaned forward to place one soft kiss on the side of my jaw, standing on her tiptoes to reach without my assistance. "Now," she began, "you were saying?"

"Uh, right." I was absolutely lost in those beautiful dark brown eyes. She has this depth that not everyone has, the true window to her soul. I thought of something quickly. "What's your favorite color?"

Her laugh was intoxicating and seemed to have dropped an octave after having been kissed properly up against the wall in an empty house. Ok, maybe it was my imagination, but the thought made me smile to myself.

She was definitely caught off guard."Wait, _what_?" I took her hand and led her to the edge of her bed. It was comparable to mine in flatness – although compared to Alice almost anyone's bed seemed like an army cot – but had a distinctive "comfy" feel once sat upon. Distinctly feminine.

We sat, and I held her small hand between mine in my lap. "There's just so much I still don't know about you." I paused, noticing for the first time that the song had changed. "And I want to know everything." I tried to deemphasize the word "everything" so as not to seem creepy, but I really did want to know _everything_ about her.

She reclined back against her pale blue pillowcase and smiled, eyes still very much aimed in my direction. "It changes. With my mood, with the day, with the moment."

I was wrong, Bella Swan was no minimalist, she was so densely complex that every little part of her became concentrated until it looked like one big simple whole. "Well what about today?" Maybe it was obnoxious to push the point, maybe juvenile. But if I couldn't comfortably ask about colors the rest of the night was most certainly in trouble.

I could register the blush creeping into her cheeks and replayed my words in case I'd inadvertently said something that could be mistaken for some kind of euphemism or innuendo. I seemed to do a lot of that without realizing it. No, I was certain it wasn't anything I said. "Hmm…well today I'd have to say slate green." _Ok, what the fuck does that mean? Is slate green even a color?_ I said nothing. "Lately my favorite color depends a lot on you."

Alright this girl gets deeper and deeper by the minute, and the fact that anything in her life seemed to depend on me, no matter how insignificant, was a victory. I raised an eyebrow, something I found to be more expressive than actually questioning someone. For some reason she had to look away before answering. "Your eyes, they change depending on what you're wearing. And whatever color they seem to be, seems to be my favorite." I didn't have to look at her to know she'd be turning red, but I wanted to see it.

I leaned over her to touch one pink cheek, and honestly if I'd spent one nanosecond thinking about doing it I wouldn't have. She held her breath as my fingers brushed along the side of her face. She scooted her entire body to one side, motioning with a few taps across the comforter that I should sit next to her. I forget where it came from, but I know someone once said "Ask and ye shall receive." Bella's little taps most definitely asked me to lay next to her and I happily obliged, resting my head on the pillow beside her, handling every movement with caution.

She lifted my hand from where it had been casually draped across my stomach, and brought it up towards her face, studying it intensely. "What about you? What's your favorite color?"

_Shit_. I asked first so there was literally no pressure on her answer, but mine was just ridiculously loaded. I couldn't use the eye thing, although since she mentioned it I realized that rich shade of chocolate brown had definitely been calling to me lately. And my honest answer was probably black, like Opal, like amps, like Johnny Cash… but the little bits of blue around her room suddenly jumped out at me all at once.

Bella, on the few instances I'd actually seen her, looked particularly beautiful in blue. I tugged at the blue sweater still hanging, somewhat oversized, on her frame. "I like this. It's my favorite on you." Ok, that was kind of roundabout and didn't fully answer the question, but it put us on more of a level playing field.

She seemed to acknowledge this as she moved on to a new line of questioning. "Tell me about your favorite birthday. The best one you ever had." Bella shifted her head down off the pillow until it was resting on my shoulder. I wanted so much to see what she looked like leaning against me, but my eyes stayed focused on the ceiling. I could smell her shampoo mixed with that warm exotic mixture never failing to drive me wild. Her warm exhaling breath danced along the base of my neck, and she rested one hand on my chest directly over my heart.

It was nice to be asked a question that required no thought for once. "My parents, they are ridiculous. I mean that in the best of ways. They are just funny and quirky and wanted everything for us – still do. They just love music – all kinds – which is why they initially forced all of us into it. But what they didn't see coming was how much we absorbed all of it, like little sponges. The music they played around the house was the music we loved. And Alice and I, you could just imagine, had this thing for The Kinks."

I wasn't big into storytelling, and I'd never really volunteered anything about my life to anyone before, but I found myself becoming increasingly animated as the story went on.

"My favorite was "You Really Got Me" and Alice always liked "All Day and All of the Night." Between the two of us our parents always said it was like having the British Invasion right in our own house. The year we turned seven, they surprised us with a trip into Seattle to this little club. I swear I don't know what they said or did to get two seven year olds into the nightclub. But they let us in and we sat at a small table in the corner right up by the stage and The Kinks were actually fucking performing there that night." I paused to clarify. "Actually it was everyone except Ray Davies, the lead singer, but we didn't know the difference. To us, it was magic to see a band actually playing the songs we loved so much. Unequivocally, the best birthday ever."

I turned my head in an attempt to see her face just as she picked it up off my shoulder. Her expression melted into an over-exaggerated look of confusion I could tell she was faking. "I don't think I know that song, the one you liked." _Oh, Bella…you're adorable when you lie_.

I played along. "Really? Hmmmm…" I could feel an exaggerated tone creeping into my voice. It was fun to play these kind of games with her. "Well, that's a shame. Really, just too bad." If she wanted it, she'd have to ask for it.

Bella rolled her eyes, "Yeah, too bad." _Stubborn, stubborn little girl. _God, I loved calling her that.

I know she wanted me to sing it, but I was stubborn too and until she asked me for it I could definitely hold out.

We spent a few hours laying there, talking about anything and everything. I learned that Bella loved scary movies, French impressionism, and black coffee. She loved _The Shining _and hated _The Notebook_.

She also confessed to having a complete Jane Austin collection, and put up a good show of loving the classics, while her true favorite reading material was a toss-up between trashy comic books and the books she loved as a child. When she explained, "there's just something pure and innocent about them" I wanted envelop her – but this part wasn't about the kissing or the touching. This part was about learning. And as far as I was concerned, Bella Swan could teach me anything she wanted.

Once we had exhausted a litany of conversations focused on our past lives, it appeared we had run out of things to say. It wasn't an awkward silence, marked by the absence of words, but instead a full-weighted one filled with the aura of endless possibilities.

I could tell she was drifting off when her breaths became slow and deep. Her head resting in the crook of my neck, hand once again draped across my chest. Although it was tempting to close my eyes and stay right there with her, I knew the millions of reasons why that would have been a bad idea.

The man with the gun who sleeps down the hall was a pretty good one for starters.

And she was a big part of it. She deserved to go on a real date with a boy who would come in and meet her dad. She deserved the best I could offer her. And if my spending the night in her bed would in any way jeopardize these things, I'd never forgive myself.

I hummed the first few bars of "You Really Got Me," an attempt to fulfill her unspoken request from earlier, while deciding what to do. It made me happy to think that my mind could race, so awake with thoughts, ideas, and strategies, while she slept so peacefully. It made me feel like I could protect her.

It became surprising that my phone hadn't rung in all the time I'd been here, but as I pulled it from my pocked I noticed it'd died somewhere along the way. The only one who'd be concerned at this point was Alice since our parents would have been asleep for hours already, and if she was really worried she'd have tried Bella.

I didn't know what time Chief Swan would be home from his exceptionally long night, but I was positive I didn't want to be here to find out. I shifted ever so carefully, gently repositioning sleeping Bella without waking her. She looked so tiny and delicate curled up on top of her bed, clutching the spare pillow in my absence. It was as if she missed me without even knowing she missed me.

I took a slip of paper from her desk and wrote my note quickly, before I could analyze my words to death:

_Didn't want to make a bad first impression with Chief Swan. _

_Thank you, for everything. For just being you. _

_Edward_

I placed it beneath her phone, the first place I'd check in the morning, and slipped quietly through the house. I paused momentarily at the bottom of the stairs, to reflect on the night as a benchmark – a moment in which everything changed. I laughed silently as the lyrics to my favorite Kinks song danced around in my head, thinking of the serendipity – of all the times I'd heard the words I couldn't assign them any true meaning until now.

The loudest noise of my entire escape was the growl of my engine as I turned the key in the ignition. I had hoped it wouldn't wake her, but thinking back to her peaceful face I doubted it.

* * *

BPOV

I awoke startled, suddenly remembering the circumstances under which I'd fallen asleep. He'd been here, next to me. It had been real. I didn't have to look around to know he was long gone; the space next to me was cold to the touch.

Stumbling to the window I could see my dad's cruiser in the spot where Edward's car had been. _Boy in my room all night…ok, so maybe now it was Charlie 1 – Bella 1._ As wonderful as it had been, it was as if the night had never happened. There was just no evidence.

A deep exhalation blew a stray hair from across my face and I turned back to my empty room, trying to recapture the feeling of having him with me. It was in this moment I spotted the blue slip of paper beneath my phone on the nightstand.

I read it once quickly and then reread it carefully. _He_ was thanking _me_…for existing? It just didn't add up. I should be thanking him for overlooking my flaws, for putting up with my imperfections, for letting me fall asleep in his arms. I read the note again and felt the familiar blushing rush to my cheeks.

* * *

We had texted a few times during the day on Sunday, but Charlie's half-awake half-asleep state gave me plenty to do. I pretty much orbited around him wherever he happened to exist during each given moment. For a busy day it seemed horribly unproductive. I actually started getting excited for school so I could get out of the house and see Alice. The only catch was that my best friend just happened to be one of the few people I could not talk to about _him_ – it just seemed wrong.

We excitedly met up the next morning before homeroom, Alice and I alone for the first time since I'd fled the scene of the crime. Ok, it wasn't a crime, it wasn't even something wrong. But fleeing definitely gave it that feel. We didn't do the whole small-talk thing or shoot the shit about the weather; instead we picked up where we'd left off like nothing ever happened.

"So, I had this dream about Jasper last night." Her warm smile was undoubtedly sincere which made me more interested that I'd ordinarily be.

I nodded encouragingly. "Spill it!" It sounded like a bad line from a bad movie, but I didn't care.

"Well…" she took a deep breath indicating this would be long, "he was singing on a stage, all by himself. And we were in a large venue someplace, nothing I recognized, and I was out in the crowd someplace." She moved her arms and acted out things as she explained them. "He dedicated a song to 'someone really special' and started to sing. I wish I could remember what it was, something I knew though. Oh! Wait, that song – God it was sexy! - you know, it goes 'girl, you'll be a woman soon'… And when he finished a large spotlight panned through the crowd…" she gesticulated out to both sides as if embodying the spotlight itself, "until it found me. It rested over me and he said into the mic, in that husky voice of his, 'I hope you liked it, Alice.'" She clenched her teeth together, eyes growing wide attempting to contain the scream she so obviously wanted to emit. "Do you even believe it?"

I was excited for her. I had been picturing it from my perspective with Edward singing and realized if I'd had a dream like that I'd be off-the-walls ecstatic too. "Alice, I think that's incredible. It's your mind's way of telling you he's ready and you should go for it." I knew Edward had given her similar advice the other night, but played dumb about the whole thing. Maybe if the both of us suggested it she'd act.

"I've been thinking a lot about it lately, and I'm just gonna ask him out and stop torturing myself." I was hoping she didn't say this intending for me to convince her otherwise because I wouldn't – it was a good idea. "I think I'll say something to him during the practice on Wednesday."

Wednesday! I had forgotten the band had practices on Wednesdays and I'd received an open invitation to attend! It helped my mood to know that in the worst-case scenario I'd be seeing Edward in less than 60 hours.

Our day was like most others, although it was killing me to keep my thoughts of Edward entirely to myself. I had wanted to send him a text about every thought, every musing, everything I was doing, but if there was one quick way to scare off a guy it usually included stalkeresque tendencies.

I was beginning to wonder if my compulsive thinking about Edward was causing me to lose a grip on reality when I imagined hearing his name everywhere. It wasn't until midway through the last period of the day when I realized I'd heard it for real.

The girl sitting in front of me was talking to the girl on her left about Edward. I desperately wanted to jump in, adding my own mature observations: _Oh, him? Yeah, he was in my room this weekend – all night long. If he wasn't such a gentleman I'd probably have jumped his bones… _

Ok, until I had thought the words I hadn't realized they were true. But I was certain I would have let things go further if the opportunity had presented itself. I felt my heart aching for Edward, for preventing me from being in that position to begin with. He seemed to do everything the right way and I respected him for it.

I leaned forward, trying to look inconspicuous, to hear exactly what the two were saying. I knew nothing about them other than they usually wore these sour expressions like they'd just caught a whiff of something rotten. I liked to imagine it was their personalities.

"…drove right past my house the other day, and I swore he stopped to check me out. Too bad he's so deranged."

The girl to the left laughed, but responded in the form of a question: "You don't really believe that do you? All the shit they say about him? He's too incredibly gorgeous to be as fucked up as everyone says."

I had no idea what "everyone says" but felt an angry heat radiating through my body. If it wouldn't have been so obvious I would have leaned even farther forward.

The one in front of me took on a new tone and went back at her friend. "I mean have you seen the sister? One look and anyone'd be convinced someone in that gene pool had been institutionalized. You know their dad's a doctor too – I'll bet he experiements on his own kids or something."

Alice was right when she told me the rumor mill in this place was beyond absurd. It was the kind of situation where the right thing to do would have been to just ignore their ignorance and move on with my life, but hearing them talk about the Cullens that way was _infuriating_.

I was beginning to daydream of hair pulling and eye gauging when the head in front of me whipped around to launch an angry stare directly at me. "_What_ is your problem?" A glimpse down at my hand, outstretched toward her, indicated that while fantasizing of giving her long blonde hair a good tug, I'd apparently done it for real.

"Uhh…" ok, there's just _no_ good excuse for this one. The truth would have made the most sense: _Oh, me? My problem? Well I heard you badmouthing my boyfriend and his whole fucking family and wanted to manually remove your brain through your nose. But seeing as how that's pretty messy I went for a nice hair tug instead…_

Bella Swan = chicken shit. "Oh! You had something in your hair. I fixed it for you." I dropped the imaginary piece of lint, or dust, or whatever it was I'd been pretending to pull from her shiny hair onto the floor. I finished with my phoniest of smiles, but since she didn't know me from Eve she didn't catch on.

It had been therapeutic to stand up for Edward in my own, below-the-radar, passive aggressive kind of way. I'd have to control myself going forward so it wouldn't be an accidental eye gauge next time.

It took me a few minutes to realize that I'd mentally labeled Edward as my boyfriend. _Was_ he my boyfriend? I was never one for labels to begin with, but this one held a lot of weight. I guess it was _important_ in a way other labels often weren't. I wondered what he thought about "us" although that in itself was kind of a label. My little voice urged me to text him for the thousandth time that day and I made an effort to mentally punch that little voice in the face. Pace yourself. _Slow and steady wins the race. _

After class I'd tried to rush out front to catch a glimpse of Edward, uh.. I mean ask Alice a question. But they were nowhere in sight. Apparently I could add "punctual" to the list of his incredibly positive attributes.

* * *

Once Charlie arrived home that night I'd received another blow of disappointment. The man got another point against me for his secondary secret motivation for sending me to private school. They fax and e-mail out a parental newsletter each week to keep parents "abreast of their child's academic challenges for the week." Not only did he receive the newsletter, but he read and analyzed it.

I imagined when I came to live in Forks he'd be the kind of dad who sat on the couch watching sports, going to bed early, and staying mostly out of my life - fearing the idea of having to parent a teenage daughter. Charlie Swan, you deserve much more credit than I'd ever intended to give you. "So, I see you've got a big test this Thursday. Pre-calculus right?"

I hated that I couldn't read where he was going with this. "Uh huh. No big deal." Best to say as little as possible until he shows his hand.

"I don't know Bells," he rubbed the back of his neck – a bad sign, "Sounds like a big deal being your first test and all. I know you've always been a good student, but I promised your mom I'd stay involved. And from the little I know about parenting, it seems I should be making sure you study for this one." I understood every word he'd said and still couldn't interpret the bottom line. What was he getting at? "Straight home from school this week, ok?"

Ahhh.. so that was it. No problem. Where else would I go in the middle of the – oh, shit! "Char – uh, Dad? I kind of already have plans for Wednesday." If I didn't give it a shot I'd never know what he'd say.

Rather than respond in one of those borderline-nasty sarcastic tones, he presented his words as nicely as possible. "Uh, no you kind of don't. Sorry kid." _Bonus points_. What was it now? Charlie 100 – Bella screwed.

* * *

I waited until Wednesday to call and tell Edward. Truthfully it had taken that long to work up the nerve. Especially because I'd been going through severe deprivation and wanted to go to the practice almost more than I wanted anything.

"Hey. I'm glad you called." _God_ his voice gave me the tingles each and every time I heard it.

"I'm not so sure you'll be glad once I tell you why I'm calling." Maybe it was presumptuous to think he'd even care whether or not I could attend his practice, but considering I'd just been invited I didn't want to bail on him already.

The tone of his voice indicated worry… which was kind of cute coming from him. "Why? Is everything okay?"

"Yeah, it's just that Charlie found out about my big test on Thursday and I'm under house arrest until then." I paused a second but continued before he could respond. "Which means I can't go with you to your practice on Wednesday."

He let out a short breath I could hear through the phone, and I swore I could hear him smiling. _Smiling?_ "Well it might surprise you to know that I agree with Chief Swan on this one." _What the…?_ "Don't get me wrong, the thought of staying away from you for another few days is excruciating, but," he took a dramatic pause in very Alice-like fashion, "I think you should put yourself first and prepare for your exam. We practice all the time, it's no big deal."

Aw, hell… how is it possible for the boy to raise the bar on "perfect" with every encounter?

I had no rebuttal but couldn't let the silence hang in the air any longer. "Can I still come with you on Friday? To your gig?" _Gig?_ Did anyone even really call it that? I was speaking based purely on my television and movie encounters.

He chuckled. "I'd boycott entirely if you weren't able to make it." It was unfair that he could make me blush over the phone, but I didn't mind turning red when he couldn't see me.

We spoke for another half hour about what had been going on the last two days, although I couldn't fully relax thinking Charlie would bust things up any minute. He hadn't mentioned phone calls, but at this point I wouldn't put anything past him. I was pretty sure he learned his life lessons from television and movies too and banning phone calls is just the kind of thing a TV parent would do.

During the call neither one of us mentioned the other night in any specific terms, but it didn't matter; the unspoken words seemed to carry more weight than they would once uttered.

I could hear Emmett in the background banging on his drum kit from down the hall. How could the rest of them coexist with all that noise? Well, they _were_ musically inclined… maybe to them it truly was music. "I'll call you tomorrow, ok? You'll probably need a study break for a few minutes." _Boy he wasn't kidding. _But I couldn't imagine anticipating his phone call would allow for much studying to begin with…

"Sounds great, thanks." _I'll be counting the minutes, the seconds…_

"Oh, Bella?" I could tell it was the kind of question he'd been intending to ask for a while but waited until the last minute to make it sound like a casual afterthought.

"Hmm?" _Whatever you're asking, the answer is yes! _

"Are you available on Saturday night? I'd really like to take you out…on a real date."

I was glad he was asking over the phone, because my jaw hung open slackly before clamping shut to stifle my urge to scream a resounding "YES!" into the receiver. "Saturday would be perfect. I'm looking forward to it already." _Truer words were never spoken._

This time I was sure he was smiling. "Well go put that beautiful brain of yours to use. And be thankful for all of that quiet you've got over there." I could hear the crashing sound of a cymbol in the background, "It's a wonder I've made it this far with all the distractions around here."

"Goodnight, Edward." _I wish you were crawling into bed with me again tonight. _

I heard a nervous chuckle and suddenly wondered if I'd said the words out loud. I was 99% sure I hadn't. "Goodnight, Isabella."

This was going to be one very long week.

* * *

**Author's Note: It was requested I take a break from cliffhanger chapters so I hope I did you proud with this one. **

**I have one paper left and then I'm done with grad school for the summer (it's actually a **_**Twilight**_** related paper so it's all good!), but I'm still planning to get you a new chapter next week. **

**Reward me for all of my diligence with a review! Good, bad, or ugly… your feedback keeps me going!**

**L. **

**Other Songs:  
The Kinks – You Really Got Me **(don't worry... I have the feeling we haven't heard the last of this one...)  
**The Kinks – All Day and All of the Night  
Neil Diamond – Girl You'll Be a Woman Soon**


	8. Pink Moon

**Author's Note: Happy Mother's Day to all you mothers out there! To everyone else, Happy Sunday! **

**In case you were wondering, no – I haven't disappeared! So sorry for the late posting this weekend! I had to finish up my final paper for grad school and that ate up a lot of my time. I'm glad to tell you Chapter 8 is here in full force, so I hope you'll enjoy it! **

**A special thanks to my sister, Alli, who marathoned her way through my entire story this week to give me her feedback. Enjoy that very last bit of college life while you can! **

**Thanks to all of you for your great feedback so far – it drives me to top myself each week! **

**L. **

**P.S. - Oh yeah, did I forget to mention a little Alice's POV action?  
**

**Nick Drake – Pink Moon **

* * *

Chapter 8 – Pink Moon

APOV

I'd made my decision and was sticking with it: for better or worse Wednesday would be the first day of the rest of my life.

On any other day I'd be racing out to the parking lot after the last bell. Edward had once said if I wasn't outside waiting when he pulled up he'd just keep on driving. Never in a million years did I think he'd actually do it (with him these kinds of things were usually all talk), but I didn't want to take any chances. It was partially this and partially my anxiety over the night ahead that had me out in front before the silver car was anywhere in sight.

Thank heavens for Bella and her ability to always remain the voice of reason. Come to think of it, she was somewhat irrational by general standards, but comparatively reasonable measured up to me. That's why we worked so well together.

I stood in front of the main entrance, tapping a black shiny shoe against the damp pavement. I decided that having brothers was like having a headache: generally nothing to think much about until it impedes you from going about your business. Waiting for Edward to show was most definitely impeding on my business. It occurred to me that headaches didn't have the benefit of cute friends the way brothers sometimes did and shot down my own analogy, forgiving Edward somewhat. Jasper was, after all, the reason for all of this.

As a streak of silver appeared in the far end of the parking lot, I rushed forward prepared to hop in before he could even come to a complete stop. I couldn't afford to waste a single second.

I said nothing, quickly sliding in and slamming the door.

"All right. What crawled up your ass and died?" _Asshole_.

"Must be that flock of seagulls perched on your head – oh no, wait, that's just your hair. What'd you do, comb it with a sock?" It was mean and undeserved and we both knew it.

Luckily he knew me well enough to brush it off. "Al, everything ok?"

I contemplating a simple white lie to end the line of questioning, but it was something I _wanted_ to talk to him about. I wouldn't go so far as to say we talked about _everything_, but we shared a lot. "Tonight's the night; I'm gonna do it." I closed my eyes hoping I'd die of embarrassment for having actually said the words out loud.

Perhaps my wish for death hit a little too close to home since my eyes were jostled open with Edward swerving the car back onto the right side of the road.

He looked at me incredulously for a minute. "Why must you tell me these things? Your sex life is none of my business." Ok, I changed my mind again – brothers are most _definitely_ like headaches…

I kept waiting for him to laugh; he's much too smart to be so stupid. "Edward, please tell me you're not serious. You are really unbelievable." Not only did he and Emmett launch project "Keep Alice Chaste" last year with this whole send-my-boy-crazed-sister-to-private-school campaign, but now he was reading sexual innuendo into my words as I poured my heart out. He was starting to translate less like a headache and more like a migraine.

He seemed genuinely confused, and like the good sister I am I decided to throw him a bone. "It has nothing to do with my sex life, thank-you-very-much." I let out a quick breath, turning my upper body to better face him. "I'm tired of waiting around for things to happen. I mean, I believe in fate, and destiny, and soul mates, but I also believe that waiting one more day for life to come and find me is just out of the question." As I spoke the words I wasn't sure they entirely made sense.

"Yeah, but on the flip side I waited around and Bella practically fell into my lap. You just never know."

"That's just it. The not knowing." It made things monumentally easier that he seemed to understand where I was coming from. "I'm tired of not knowing."

He nodded- conceding my point – the twitch of a smile in the corner of his mouth. "Go get 'em, tiger." _My brother is my absolute favorite person in the world. And he totally knows it. _

* * *

Bella had been put on under lock and key, so naturally Edward was back to his somewhat sulky self. This was usually my cue to step in and distract him, make him smile, work some of my sisterly voodoo. Tonight, the boy was seriously on his own. I wondered if he could tell when I needed the same kind of treatment from him.

I'd been hoping to ride over with Emmett, realizing that the phrase 'ignorance is bliss' also applied to others around you. That he didn't know what I had up my sleeve took a bit of the pressure off and right now it was like two anvils and a cruise ship were resting on my shoulders. Instead, Emmett opted to spend the whole afternoon over there leaving me to deal with the pressure a little longer.

About halfway there Edward finally said something. The silence was blaring and I'd been afraid if I spoke I'd have puked instead. "Al, I don't want to make things more difficult for you…" _Then don't! _"…but, you don't look so good."

I could feel my eyes widening, willing them to keep my eyes in the sockets. Not only would a trip to the emergency room really screw things up tonight, but I doubt Jasper'd say "yes" to a girl who could simultaneously look at his face and his package… ooohh now _that_ could be interesting…

"Wha – What do you mean?" I composed myself enough to start checking my outfit, my hair, my makeup, in the tiny vanity mirror.

"Stop, stop, stop! You're nuts, you know that?" He didn't laugh, holding it back. Which was a smart move since I'm almost positive that would have sent me over the edge. "I didn't mean that. I mean you look like you've smelled something rancid. You just don't look like yourself. Although just there for a second, the minute your mind was distracted, you suddenly turned back into Alice." We pulled up in front of the house, the glow from the garage window visible against a large tree beside it. "Just remember one thing, ok? He's a fucking fool either way: he says "no" and he's missing out on the best opportunity he'll ever have. He says "yes" and he's a fool for not asking you himself. Honestly, he doesn't deserve you." We both got out of the car and stood in front of it for a second. "But then again, no one does." This time he sent a full smile in my direction and gave me a half-hug across the shoulders as we headed for the door. _Edward Cullen you must be some kind of lovesick girl whisperer_. The cruise ship and one anvil were gone, and the remaining one suddenly felt much smaller.

His hand paused on the doorknob to give me another pat on the shoulder and then he opened it, ushering me in before him. A quote I'd heard once suddenly flew at me, and it summed up my feelings better than I could articulate this point: "All my past life had been but a preparation for this hour and for this trial." It was either Winston Churchill or Gossip Girl… I couldn't remember.

I took a deep breath and let it out slowly as I walked into my future.

I guess my future wasn't ready for me quite yet…

Edward hid his eyes in horror as I struggled to keep from choking on the piece of gum I'd been nervously chewing. There, across the futon were Emmett and Rosalie, in varying states of undress, appearing to see who could devour the other's face first. From the bit I saw, it looked like Rosalie was winning.

Apparently we hadn't made enough noise since they didn't stop right away. It took Edward's deep voice with an exuberant "Dude!" to get their attention. Rather than look embarrassed, both looked annoyed. If I wasn't here I was fairly certain Emmett would have just kicked Edward out and gone on about his business, but he took his brotherly duties to heart when it came to me and knew that wasn't an option.

It was a relief when Edward spoke again; I'd frozen in place and for the first time in my memory I had absolutely nothing to say. "You guys have a whole fucking house! C'mon!" I turned my back to them, hitting Edward until he did the same, allowing them some privacy to reassemble themselves. Ok, so it wasn't so much about privacy as it was about not wanting certain parts of either of them burned into my brain.

"Um…" I shifted my attention to an old Pink Floyd poster on the wall that had been faded with time. "So, where's Jasper?" It hadn't occurred to me until I asked that he was definitely not there.

Rosalie, who I hadn't cued into my intentions out of fear of blabbery, gave an inadvertently insensitive answer. "Who gives a shit?" I knew she was still hopped up on hormones, but she didn't have to be so nasty.

"Don't be such an asshole, Rose. She just asked a goddamn question." Big brothers rock, twin brothers get bonus points.

Apparently she was more upset about being cockblocked than Emmett since his response was calm and actually made sense. "Went on a pizza run. We were hoping if food came before you guys Edward wouldn't enforce his anti-mastication rule."

Edward and I both laughed at that one; where the hell did he pull out a word like that?

He rubbed between his eyes. "How long have you had that one saved up?"

"About a week. It was on Dad's _Word of the Day_ calendar and I thought it sounded dirty; that's the only reason I even remember it."

I could read Edward's mind for sure: _No shit, Sherlock_.

He laughed and sat on the chair Jasper had rescued from the garbage collector at the end of one of their neighbor's driveways. It was a faded orange and green graphic pattern that had been new and stylish at some point, probably around 1970. Now it was dingy and "vintage" and, although used really wasn't my style, was the perfect addition to the cozy little practice space. "Nah, not tonight. Since Bella couldn't come I'm a big fan of mastication. In fact, I'm gonna do it all over this fucking room tonight while you all watch."

I was embarrassed _for_ him. It was juvenile, cliché, and just plain silly. But then again, the Edward we all knew and loved a few weeks ago would have banned food from within a 20 foot radius of Opal. If cheesy jokes and sexual innuendo was the most we'd have to endure for him to loosen up and have some fun, it wouldn't be so bad.

Something in my chest got tight as I was finally able to process that Jasper wasn't there. Of course he'd be back soon, but then everyone would be here and I couldn't just ask him out in front of everyone. If he said yes I'd always wonder if it was because he had an audience. _What was I thinking? There was no freaking way I'd be able to do this. _

I headed for the door, not sure where I was going. "Guys, I'm just going out for some air." I noticed the second of concern wash over Edward, but I was able to tell him to relax with my eyes. I just needed to be alone.

The cool night air in my lungs was refreshing, slowing my heart long enough to think. It would be my luck to finally work up the courage to make a move and have the moment deflated by circumstance. I was seriously afraid I'd lose my nerve if I had to wait any longer. I sat on the low stone wall the Hales' had across the front of their yard, dropping my chin into my hands. The sound of my vibrating phone perked me up and I fished it from my enormously oversized purse. The joke was that I could run away with what I had in there, although right now it wasn't such an out-there notion.

_1 New Message_

_From: Bella (love her!)_

_hey – just saw Neil Diamond on tv & thought of you_

I found myself smiling and replaying the details of my dream. Thinking about it would either help my current mindset or make everything much, much worse. Every entry in my phone had my own editorial after it – I guess you could say I wear my opinions on my sleeve.

Just as I revisited the part of my dream in which Jasper said my name I heard a door slam.

He was suddenly there, walking around to his passenger side door when he spotted me. I could see the tower of pizza boxes on the seat and was surprised to see his hand drop from the door handle as he walked in my direction.

I couldn't keep my eyes away from the way his low-slung jeans barely rested on his hips. The dark green of his boxers sticking out, taunting me in their very presence. He reached an arm up over his head to scratch the back of his neck lifting his dark grey CBGB t-shirt enough to reveal a hint of his strong abs. I always loved that shirt on him and the peek at the abs was an added perk.

"Hey," his voice was smooth, "they banish you?" The large moon cast a sweeping light across his face, illuminating his eyes.

Hearing him actually calmed me rather than confirming my fear of projectile vomiting. "No, I banished myself."

His smile was adorable, bringing a dimple to one side. He sat beside me and neither of us said a word.

After a moment, he broke the silence. "You know," his eyes drifted up to the sky, "nights like this always make me think of that Nick Drake song."

I knew the one he meant; Edward had all of his albums and "Pink Moon" was perhaps my favorite of the bunch. But I wanted him to keep talking so I played dumb. "I don't think I know that one."

He smiled again, shifting his eyes to me skeptically. Holding up his silver cell phone he gestured towards me with it. "Call me."

Confusion must have been written across my face. Jasper chuckled softly, "Just do it, ok?"

I scrolled down to _Jasper 3 _and quickly hit the button to call him.

The familiar acoustic guitar strumming began as his phone lit up in the dark night, the pure tones in Nick Drake's voice sounding bolder in the quiet.

_I saw it written and I saw it say  
Pink moon is on its way  
And none of you stand so tall  
Pink moon gonna get you all  
It's a pink moon  
Yeah, it's a pink moon_

A clear night like this, a big bright sky, the song was perfect for the moment. I needed to be brilliant, to wow him with my wit and charm. But I just didn't think fast enough for that. "Great song."

He had been looking at me, but turned his head back towards the heavens. "That's why I picked it for you." The pause after his words was immeasurable, enhanced by my complete and total paralysis. "Not, that I can recall you ever actually calling me."

If this was a movie, fireworks would be going off or a shooting star would pass overhead to symbolize the swelling of my heart to encompass every feeling, every want, every thought I've ever had towards Jasper Hale. But this is real life, and we sat there quietly – obviously my turn to speak.

"You picked it just for me?" _Again with this. Cullen, you've really got a way with words._

"Yeah, it kinda just always made me think of you." I wasn't the kind of girl who blushed easily, but I could feel a warmth creeping up into my cheeks. It was nice just to know he thought of me at all. I didn't realize I was staring until he touched my arm to get my attention.

He parted his lips to speak, but I felt a surge of confidence and chose to take advantage of it.

"Jasper, I was really out here waiting for you. I have something I really need to say." It was scary knowing that the words were out there and I couldn't take them back.

His smile indicated that he wasn't fearing what I was about to say. _Oh, if you only knew…_

A few deep breathes gave me the courage to continue, ready to show him my hand.

"I've been hoping you'd ask me out for a while. And, to be honest, I'm tired of waiting. So," one more deep breath before ripping off the band-aid, "would you like to go out with me sometime?"

_No turning back now_.

He smiled and I could hear his soft laugh underneath his breath as he dropped his head into his hands before turning to look at me again. "Alice, I'd love to."

He laughed again, louder this time. "You know, I'd have asked you a long time ago, but Emmett told me a few years back that he'd liquefy anyone who went near you." _Emmett, your ass is grass_.

I felt heat rising through me again, but this time it was anger. "What? Are you effing serious?" I heard my high voice reach new octaves inspired by outrage.

"I don't think he specifically meant me at the time, but I was pretty scrawny back then. I didn't think I could take him." My eyes went immediately to his strong forearms, working up to his biceps and shoulders. _Jasper, my friend, you may have been scrawny back then, but now…_

"Oh, size has nothing to do with it. You just have to know his weakness, and he is _so_ gonna get it." I knew both brothers called this the "Wrath of Alice" and this time it would definitely live up to its name.

Jasper stood and outstretched his hand to help me up off the wall. "So where are you taking me?" he said it with a smile.

I couldn't help grinning back, until I realized I didn't have an answer to his question; I hadn't really thought that far ahead. Perhaps I was assuming rejection. My smile fell and I felt myself beginning to panic.

His hands on both of my shoulders steadied me. "Alice, I'm just kidding. Why don't you come to the party on Friday," he stopped to glance back at the door to the garage, "as my date." It sounded old-fashioned, but I liked it. They were words I'd been waiting years to hear and now that he'd said them I'd probably never stop smiling .

I was prepared for the non-brilliance that would escape my mouth this time. "Sounds great."

He reached for my small hand and held it between both of his as we walked towards his car. "Hungry?" The steam from the leaning tower of pizza had completely fogged up the window.

"Starving." I watched as he picked up the stack and headed for the door. I was over the moon; everything I'd wanted and more had just materialized and it a "too good to be true" feeling hung in the air.

I couldn't help wondering if being with Jasper would change everything.

As Jasper crossed the threshold, arms full of boxes, Emmett's voice boomed from inside. "What the fuck, man? You were gone so long Edward's skinny chicken legs were starting to look appealing…"

Maybe things wouldn't be so different after all.

* * *

BPOV

The walls of my bedroom were definitely starting to feel like a prison after a few days of solitary confinement. Not that I had stay in my room, but it was the best place to kill time while pretending to study; by now I had the material down cold. I glanced around at the familiar four walls again. No wonder so many teenagers go through a rebellious stage…

It was impossible not to think of him, wondering what he was doing at each moment. Right about now they were finishing up their practice and I wanted to badly to be there. It wasn't really about the practice itself or hearing them play, although they were incredibly impressive, but my thoughts lingered on the way he draped his arm casually over my shoulder in front of his friends and family. The way he held open doors and held my hand. The electricity in the air as he drove me home. Being with Edward made me believe that anything was possible. It was a feeling I could get used to.

Thinking of Edward somehow led my thoughts back around to Alice. I hadn't heard anything from her yet and hoped if things were good she'd at least call and kill the anxious feeling manifesting someplace between my heart and my solar plexus.

As if anticipating my thoughts, I suddenly got a text from her – and, in true Alice fashion, it was completely subtle: _Alice & Jasper sitting in a tree…_

Although I'd never broach the subject, I was pretty confident she probably had their kids' names picked out by now.

Getting the full scoop at school tomorrow was almost as much an incentive as the end of my confinement. I went to bed, willing the time to pass quickly and hoping of long Edward-filled dreams. _Knowing my luck they'd be long Rosalie-filled dreams… _

I was at school early, just glad to be out of the house. I'd been coming to school all week yet today it felt like the world was my oyster. And from the look on Alice's face as she quickly speed-walked down the hallway the world was apparently her oyster too.

She started spilling her guts, and between dramatic pauses and Alice's own reenactments I was able to assert that she was going to the party on Friday with Jasper. It seemed like semantics since she'd have gone anyway, although she would have ridden with one of her brothers. But it could seem like semantics to me since my love life seemed to be on track. It was nice to think and honestly believe its validity – although I was sure not to get cocky or overconfident since good things tended to fade fast for me.

"And Bella," she added with a sincere ear-to-ear grin, "Edward didn't play half as well as when you were there. He was also _way_ bossier than normal – the guys really missed you." I made up my mind then and there: if Charlie tried this house arrest thing again I was _totally_ sneaking out. I felt kind of like a renegade for even _thinking_ it – hopefully my resolve wouldn't be tested on this one.

* * *

School on Friday was the freaking longest day _ever_. But it was over and my biggest concern was what to wear tonight. And possibly what to use to sedate Alice in case she worked herself up into a frenzy.

Edward was picking me up around 7:30 and I couldn't even guess when I'd be coming home. The guys were playing at a house party one of Emmett's football buddies was throwing. Big house + no parents + incredibly sexy musical boyfriend = Bella Swan's idea of heaven. Although if you add in the hundred drunk teenagers who would also be attending the vision of heaven sudden became cloudy.

Charlie had been pretty excited when I told him I'd made a friend at school. I think he was mentally patting himself on the back for the whole all-girls school idea. Of course, I didn't add that her brother had been in my bed all night last weekend. That was my opportunity for a little self-congratulations. I'd have to find someway to avoid thinking about it though since my cheeks flushed just mentally putting the words "Edward" and "bed" in the same sentence.

After going back and forth between a few things I picked a pair of jeans I hadn't worn since moving to town (old to me, new to everyone else!) and a tight-fitting black top with a deep v-neck. It wasn't the kind of thing I'd wear to school back in Phoenix or even out shopping with Alice, but when I knew I'd be seeing Edward and _representing_ him in a way, I wanted to look my best. Ok, if I'm being honest with myself I was probably afraid of the commentary from everyone else. I'd probably curl up and die if anyone said something along the lines of "what's _he_ doing with a girl like her?" I didn't have a better solution to the problem than a tight fit and a little cleavage. I looked down at myself. _A very little bit_. My subconscious could be brutal.

I experimented with nighttime makeup since I didn't normally go to these kinds of things. Considering I hadn't met anyone from the public school other than the obvious few I was nervous about fitting in, about making a good first impression. After my smoky eyes and pale glossy lips were ready, I grabbed my purse and jacket headed for the door. I wasn't surprised to see his car sitting in the driveway and knew he'd be at my door in moments. He was always one step ahead of me.

I let him knock before opening the door and watched him give me elevator eyes before even saying "hello." I couldn't help but laugh to myself; it was kind of nice to know I could have that effect on him. His eyes froze at my shoulder, which confused me until I could see a hint of purple sticking out from beneath the black fabric. Edward Cullen was _so_ picturing me in my purple bra. _And if he's good he just might see it._ I suspected after last weekend nothing too dramatic would be happening tonight, which took some of the pressure off. Note to self: Thank Mom for always insisting that underwear be pretty. She always argued that ugly underwear was a waste – and you always feel more confident when you know you've got something fancy going on. Even if no one else ever sees it. This was probably the first night in my existence where I admitted there was a possibility that someone else might be seeing my underthings… and knowing the someone I had in mind was Edward was enough to make a girl spontaneously combust.

While it was exciting to have his eyes roaming my body, it was a relief to see them finally rest at my eye level. "I'm not taking you anywhere looking like that." My heart momentarily sank, afraid that I'd not only embarrassed him but offended him at the same time. "I think I need to keep this look of yours all to myself."

I saw that hypnotic smile of his spread from ear to ear and reached out to take his hand in mine. _It's all for you silly boy, you've got nothing to worry about_. "Now _that_ is a very tempting offer."

Without swearing to it, I thought I saw a faint blush rise into his cheeks. His eyes drifted over my shoulder, glancing at the staircase before meeting my gaze again: "Isabella, you'll be the death of me." He laughed before pulling me out by one hand. I loved that we didn't need to dissect things further, to talk about it, to analyze it. Instead, we got into the car amped for whatever tonight had in store.

The house was huge for Forks standards, huge and old. It had a large wrap-around porch and cars already parked erratically across the front lawn. Edward pulled up beside Emmett's Jeep and unloaded Opal. Apparently part of Jasper's penance for the whole "quarters debacle" was loading, unloading, and setting up the equipment himself. Sounded like Alice would be having one hell of a first date.

Inside Emmett was standing over Jasper, red Solo cup in hand, giving instructions on exactly how he'd like everything set up. The humor was twofold: one that Jasper complied with a deflated "yes, master" (another part of the bet) and that Emmett seemed to be imitating Edward as he shouted orders. I rubbed his bicep hoping he wasn't offended by the gesture, but in true Edward fashion he didn't even notice. And in true Edward fashion he started helping Jasper set everything up, pushing Emmett in the chest: "Classy as always, Cullen."

While the boys worked, Alice rushed over and pulled me aside. She went over every detail of their date thusfar, including how he'd picked her up and how they sang along to old Bon Jovi songs the whole car ride over. "It was _so _much more comfortable than I'd ever imagined. Which is totally a good sign, right?"

"Alice, you guys are so right for each other its scary." And I meant it. If it was so obvious I could tell, after only a few weeks in town, then everyone else must be celebrating that the two finally wizened up enough to act on things. That kind of tension was like one of those red-wire/blue-wire moments on TV shows where someone is trying to decide which wire to cut to disable the bomb; at some point you just wanted to yell "Do it already!"

She doubled over in giggles. "So far, so good." She dragged me off to get a drink so we wouldn't have to hear the stream of profanities someone was always screaming at someone else as they prepped for a show. According to her, it didn't get fun until they actually started playing.

We nursed our cups of whatever was in the keg and finally started to relax once they had warmed up for a bit. Sharing a large ottoman we sat like a couple of groupies, whooping and hollering. Maybe the tiny bit of alcohol on an empty stomach was starting to take affect since I found myself yelling, "Take it off, Cullen!" about midway through the first song. I was sure to tell Alice not to let me have a refill.

They performed the songs I'd heard them practicing on Monday and during "Fat Bottomed Girls" Rosalie stood up on a coffee table in the world's shortest skirt pretty much showing everyone why she had inspired the choice. "Alice," I poked her in the ribs, "I know I asked you once," my eyes drifting back to a barely-decent Rosalie, "but don't let me drink _anything else_ tonight. No matter what."

As much as I loved watching him play during practice, it was incredibly sexy to see him performing in front of a crowd. I thought back to that first time at the Apple and how his attempt to single me out had been intense and almost more than I could handle. Now, I was feeling confident. Bring it on, Edward. Bring it on! Or maybe that was the alcohol talking again…

They did a slow song I didn't immediately recognize, but upon hearing its opening notes Alice squealed – hitting notes I wasn't sure really existed. Jasper let his voice melt into this place I'd never heard from him before.

_Girl, you'll be a woman soon,  
Please, come take my hand  
Girl, you'll be a woman soon,  
Soon, you'll need a man_

"Bella!" She loudly whispered in my direction, "What are the odds? That's just unbelievable!" _Well, Alice, considering I accidentally blabbed about things to Edward, who's about one half a step from Jasper, I'd say the odds are pretty good. But then again, I'd never want to burst your bubble…_ It was cute that she didn't suspect foul play from any of us. Knowing her she'd probably begin to suspect she could foresee the future.

My mom had the _Just for You_ album, but I always asked her to skip this song since it had the ability to come off as creepy. What passed between them wasn't creepy; it was sweet. I'd bet anything that the song hadn't meant one iota to Jasper until Edward had spilled the beans about Alice's dream. But from the perspective of someone in the know, looking between them there was something in the air. It was palpable. And I was starting to feel jealous that everyone had had a moment of their own tonight. Edward's fingers strummed an acoustic guitar for this song, and I wondered if Opal ever got jealous when she was put aside. I looked at the shiny black guitar, pristine in all its glory, resting in a guitar stand behind the three boys. I was pretty sure if Opal was a person she'd be Rosalie, and I was pretty sure Rosalie just didn't get jealous.

The kids at the party got riled up during "Paradise City" which strained both Edward's and Jasper's voices. They _killed_ it, in the good way, and had drunken skanky girls dancing on tables. I recognized only one from school as the blonde whose hair I'd pulled in class, but looked away without acknowledging her. He came here tonight with me and was most definitely leaving with me.

The sound of Edward's breathy voice in the mic was a surprise; he hadn't done much narrating of their performance tonight. "This one, is for a girl who was pretty desperate to hear this song last weekend." He didn't hide the dramatic wink he aimed directly at me and fingered Opal, now resting across his torso, before launching in the unmistakable riff. I watched him take a deep breath before singing, his lips pressed right up against the microphone.

_Girl, you really got me goin'  
You got me so I don't know what I'm doin'  
Yeah, you really got me now  
You got me so I can't sleep at night_

Yeah, you really got me now  
You got me so I don't know what I'm doin', now  
Oh yeah, you really got me now  
You got me so I can't sleep at night

You Really Got Me  
You Really Got Me  
You Really Got Me

They were having more fun than during another other song that night and I was blissfully happy that he'd indulged me. Watching his body, his hands, his arms, as he played made me think back to last weekend. I gave myself chills thinking of his warm strong hands against the bare skin of my back, traveling slowly upward… As our eyes connected towards the end of the song I tried to convey that I was thinking of him, that I wished we were alone in my room again right now, that if wouldn't have embarrassed him I'd have grabbed him right then and there – planting a deep hard kiss on his pouty lips.

There was a look I couldn't name in his eyes, never looking away from mine. A warm smoldering seemed to grow from within him and I realized that this time _I _had been the one doing the whole eye-fucking thing. And I _liked_ it.

The song finished on a high note and the guys abandoned everything just as someone flipped on a stereo to quickly replace the silence. He had taken me by the hand and led me out to the back patio before I had a chance to say anything.

He closed the back door behind us and stood to face me, his bright eyes more alive than I'd ever seen them. "Bella, what are you trying to do to me?" He put his arms out, backing me against the side of the house to mimic our positioning from the week before. His strong arms leaned against the siding, on either side of my head, and I could smell the clean scent of a freshly-washed boy. It was cool and delicious all at once and despite the beads of sweat that formed on his upper brow as he played, he looked and smelled incredible. I turned my head calculatedly, my warm breath grazing the inside of his arm with each exhalation. The black material slid down my shoulder a bit exposing the bright purple bra strap that had so intrigued him earlier. I hadn't orchestrated the occurrence, but couldn't have timed it any better.

"Edward Cullen, I don't know _what_ you're talking about." I tried to sound innocent, although I was a horrible liar and was hardly innocent in the matter.

His fingers traced along my face, matching the path of the flush quickly turning me a rosy shade of pink. "Hmm. Why don't I believe that?' He let his hands drop to my waist, pulling me against him – both palms resting firmly on the very lowest point of my back. His mouth was soft in texture but pressed against mine with determination. A hint of disappointment struck as one hand released me, but as I felt it slide through my hair, holding my head closer to his, the disappointment turned to jubilation. I kept both of my small hands resting on his strong chest, not really feeling him, but instead using him to keep myself horizontal. If I let go my knees would definitely buckle.

He pulled his mouth from mine, a devilish look in his eye. "Isabella Swan, I refuse to keep you out past your bedtime tonight." Although we both knew full well it was nearing three. "Especially since rumor has it you have a hot date tomorrow night." _Oh, Edward. Hot doesn't begin to cover it._

His messy hair tickled my neck as he bent forward to kiss it, tracing his way down to my shoulder. The softness of his lower lip brushed along the spot where the bright purple strap seemed to glow in the night. I closed my eyes and felt his hand reaching upward, tracing the same path as his lips. The look in his eyes was serene, genuine. He straightened my shirt back into its original upright position and wrapped an arm around my shoulders before leaning to whisper in my ear. "Every guy here's already fantasizing about doing wicked things to you, no need to stir the pot."

Even though Phoenix was in the southern part of the States, I almost wish it had that whole "southern charm" thing going. It just seemed appropriate to do one of those "Oh, Edward Cullen! You, charmer you!" kind of things. Instead, I said the only thing I could.

"You think _they're_ thinking wicked things…"

I don't know what made me so bold tonight. I'd only had the one drink and that was hours ago. It surely had to do with Edward, just being near him was intoxicating – and punch-drunk love was my drink of choice.

He dragged me, against my will, back into the party to say goodbye to everyone. Jasper was dissembling their setup without Emmett's idiotic criticisms since he'd won four rounds of quarters and had started a flip-cup tournament in the kitchen.

Edward pulled me toward him so he could be heard over the loud music. "Hang on a second. I'll be right back." He disappeared and came back with the keys he'd swiped from Emmett's pocket. I watched him firmly put them in Alice's hand. "Give them only to Rosalie, and only if she's ok to drive. Otherwise, call me."

Her high voice hit a whiny note I could tell she only used with him. "But I'm on a date!"

"Good enough excuse for why your big brother found himself wrapped around a tree tomorrow?" Man, the two of them were guilt trip champions!

She took them – of course she would – and nodded at him.

I reached out to hug her tightly, whispering loud enough that she could hear. "Nice piece of man you've got there, Cullen." I knew it excited her to hear him complimented.

She laughed and looked back over at him. "Mine! Stay away!"

I let go of her and waved goodbye again, headed out the door with Edward's arm around my waist. _It's all talk, Alice. No need to worry. I myself have a hot date to plan for. _

As if he could read my mind, he spoke. "Better rest up tonight, Swan. You'll be needing some stamina for tomorrow."

_Ohhh Edward, those words were enough to keep my imagination busy for the next twenty-four hours… _

* * *

**Author's Note: Ok, it might be an overshare, but just writing that scene got me amped for next week! My sister is graduating college this week so I'm going to be very busy, but I'm still planning to get you a wonderful Chapter 9 for next weekend. **

**Speaking of the college graduate… she suggested I create a YouTube playlist of all the songs I've referenced. What do you guys think? You give it two thumbs up and I'll have it ready for next weekend. **

**Oh, and your reviews are sexier than some up-against-the-wall Edward lovin'. Ok, that's a lie… but they come close! **

**L. **

**Other Songs  
Queen - Fat Bottomed Girls  
Neil Diamond - Girl, You'll Be a Woman Soon  
The Kinks - You Really Got Me**


	9. Follow Through

**Author's Note: OK, last week I totally bitched about how busy this week was going to be, and not only did it live up to my expectations, but exceeded them! Alas, I still made time to write so I wouldn't disappoint you guys! **

**A BIG, HUGE thank you for all your support of Chapter 8. I hope I'll continue to win you over with Chapter 9! **

**The consensus was a YouYube playlist would be a good idea, so I set one up in my (nonexistent) spare time. Since I don't think it will let me post the website, I've replaced the . with a [dot]:  
****  
****www[dot]youtube[dot]com/view_play_list?p=9228306CFD2726F2**

**Enjoy!**

**L.**

**Of course, everything **_**Twilight**_** belongs to SM… and this little story is all mine. **

**Gavin DeGraw – Follow Through**

* * *

Chapter 9 – Follow Through

EPOV

Only a few hours before our "hot date" I still hadn't planned exactly what we were going to do. No pressure or anything.

I loved every minute I'd gotten to spend with her up until this point, but I needed to be clear that she was more than someone I made out with. _Although, that part was just beyond my greatest expectations._ She was worth the awkward parental introduction. She was worth the planning, and subsequent stressing. She was worth more than I'd ever be ever to show her on my meager budget. But what made her most worth it was that she really didn't care about my meager budget or what we did; she only cared about being with me. And _that_ was exactly why tonight had to knock her socks off.

Once again, no pressure.

In a moment of panic I had asked Alice for her opinion: big, huge mistake! She made a laundry list of expensive places and activities that were way beyond my means. _Jasper had better be saving up…_

I avoided the entire subject with Emmett since I wasn't entirely sure he and Rosalie had ever actually been on a date. Usually they were glued at the face (or some other body part), which wasn't really conducive to restaurants or bowling or anything public really…

No, this was really something I wanted to plan on my own.

Rather than obsess, I thought about it calmly and elected to stay in my comfort zone. I pretty much figured that if I could survive a formal introduction to the Chief, the rest of the night would be a piece of cake.

When she had asked I told Bella to dress comfortably and casually – forcing us into dress-up clothes would only magnify any awkwardness. I wanted to show her a good time, and damn it, my idea of a good time involved jeans.

Pulling up in front of the house I realized I was a full fifteen minutes early. _Overanxious bastard._ Alice had trained me to understand that for a guy to arrive early only inconveniences the woman who times her primping exactly. I highly doubted this was Bella's modus operandi, but decided to wait a few extra minutes before heading for the door just in case.

I had thought of bringing flowers for her or something for her dad, but I didn't want to come off as trying too hard. It made more sense to be myself; hopefully that would be good enough.

Bella's form shifted past an upstairs window as I walked up the front path. A warm chocolately brown seemed to glow as the light hit her hair, filling my chest with a heaviness I couldn't name. What I did know was that seeing her boosted my confidence and helped remind me why I was here. I was here because I wanted to do right by that girl.

Two swift knocks brought the heavy footsteps to the door. For the first time I wondered what she had told him and why Chief Swan thought I was coming over. Did he know we'd been out until the early hours of this morning? I kind of hoped not – I didn't want a strike against me before I'd even been introduced.

It was surprising when he pulled the door open with a smile. "You must be Edward." All the lines I had mentally rehearsed went out the window and I silently nodded. "Come in, come in. It's nice to have a formal introduction. I've known your father for years." I wanted to feed into the sincerity of his voice, but I figured no father would genuinely be this thrilled about handing over his daughter to a boy for the night.

"It's nice to meet you too, Chief Swan. Thank you for letting me take Bella out tonight." I momentarily felt guilty for the things we'd done behind his back, particularly the almost-entire-night I'd spent in his daughter's bed. But it was very brief moment; I regretted nothing.

He chuckled in a funny, all-knowing kind of way. "I'm not too worried, Edward. I've got eyes and ears all over this town. My advice to all the kids around here has always been not to do anything you don't want me to find out about." I once again made a mental list of the things I was sure he definitely _did not_ know about before smiling and nodding in his direction. I had to give the man credit – he was _trying_ to look out for his daughter's best interest. It just happened to be fortunate that she picked the one person who wouldn't abuse the situation; although it was nice knowing we probably _could_ get away with a lot if we wanted to. For starters, it apparently hadn't crossed his mind that we wouldn't exactly be staying in for Forks for the evening… but it didn't exactly seem worth mentioning at this point.

"You've got nothing to worry about. She'll be back in one piece. Although, it won't be until late – I hope that will be okay." I didn't even recognize the sound of my voice – the anxiety must have been wrapped firmly around my vocal chords.

Chief Swan met my eyes seriously. "The back in one piece is the part I'm most concerned with. And if you're anything like your father I know you'll be incredibly responsible." It was true; I was incredibly responsible. However, by his logic Emmett too would be worthy of his trust and the guy he'd be sending off with his daughter. The thought of being lumped together was mildly sickening.

He reached out to shake my hand, and I took it. His respect was important to me because Bella was becoming more and more important to me each day.

I heard her descending the stairs before I could see her, but her timing was excellent. The small talk had begun to fade and I was ready for the night to begin. Her hip-hugging jeans caught my eye right away, but for the benefit of her father I focused intently on her smile. She truly lit up a room and the dark blue top was one I'd never seen before but in that color I loved so much. _She must have a whole closet full of shirts that color…_ I mentally kicked myself for not paying attention when I'd seen it last week. It was a relief to see that she hadn't overdressed for the evening – that, surely, could only lead to disappointment.

"Dad," she began, eyes focused on me, "I hope you've been going easy on him. It's not like he's some juvenile delinquent or something." I couldn't help smiling, thinking back to her first impression of me as a potentially psychotic murderer on a killing spree.

"On the contrary, I believe you've met a very nice young man." He gave me a look that seemed to insist "don't make me regret saying that." I hoped I never would. _No pressure here either._

He pulled Bella's shoulder to him, placing a fatherly kiss on the top of her head before heading back to their living room. I held the front door open for her and helped her into the car. _Okay, Cullen, big deep breath…. _

"So," she turned to me with apparent enthusiasm across her face, "where does this hot date begin?"

I swallowed, trying to be subtle so as not to radiate nerves. I met her eyes and asked the question that would determine the success or failure of our next stop: "Do you trust me?"

She rolled her eyes in an adopted Alice mannerism. "You know I do."

"Then prepare to be wowed!" I had dialed up a little more enthusiasm than the comment really required.

"Where to then?" the deeper, flirtatious tones creeping into her voice.

"Millie's Thai & Taco." _Need I say more?_

* * *

BPOV

In my honest opinion, the words Thai and Taco didn't even belong in the same sentence, let alone the name of a restaurant. I meant it when I said I trusted him, but not knowing what to expect from this one was a bit scary.

I tried to push the thoughts of peanut sauce filled burritos from my head and reveled in the fact that his car had radio stations – plural! I was mostly enjoying the station I did get in the truck, not that I'd been doing a lot of driving lately, but the idea of selection was pretty exciting at this point. I flipped through stations compulsively, something Edward seemed to find quite entertaining.

"You know, if you just tell me what you'd like to hear I could plug in my ipod and play it for you."

_That takes all the fun out of it!_ And I told him so.

He went back to smiling as he drove, the one side always a bit higher than the other. I settled on a Top 40 station in an attempt to update my music knowledge. It was unfortunate how after only a few minutes, I went back to the classic rock station – relieved to hear "You Can't Always Get What You Want." _This_ was music. I thought about the song for a second and the message that despite not being able to get what you want, you sometimes got what you needed. What if those two things were the same?

We pulled onto what I would definitely call the road less traveled. It wasn't really paved and seemed not to get many passersby based purely on location. There were two other cars in the dimly lit lot, which was more than I'd have anticipated. A flickering blue neon sign proudly shouted Millie's name and her apparent love of both Thai and Tacos. _Damn, repeating it didn't make it any less strange. _

I must have been giving off more of a freaked out vibe than I thought, since he felt the need to repeat himself. "Trust me." With that smile and the hint of excitement in his voice, how could I not?

He opened my door in the gentlemanly fashion I was beginning to grow fond of and took my hand, leading me up to the screen door. If it wasn't for the glow of neon I would have sworn we were going into someone's house. The building itself looked residential and I started wondering if dinner would be served in Millie's kitchen or something….

The inside had the feel of a small town hole-in-the-wall restaurant: cozy, homey, familiar. Two or three tables were occupied and Edward led the way to a moderately sized table by the back window.

"Do you come here often?" _If there's a cheesier line out there, please show yourself!_

He laughed. "I did. Pretty much once or twice a week for two years. It's been a while actually." I had been ready to pounce, wanting him to elaborate, when a loud voice rang out across the small space.

"Well, look what the cat dragged in!" Although I'd never met her before, there was absolutely, positively, not one doubt in my mind that _this _was the infamous Millie.

The woman was on the large side, with rosy cheeks and a mop of dark curly hair and grey wisps around her face. Her appearance matched that of her restaurant completely and she turned her full attention towards Edward, wiping her hands on the red and white plaid apron. "Honey, it has been _too_ long!" Her voice was loud, but kind.

His grin was full and sincere as he stood to embrace her, the way one would with an aunt or grandmother. She playfully smacked his cheek and turned to me. "Well, honey, I didn't hardly recognize you with this lovely girl at your table. I'm used to you sitting as lonesome as a cougar done lost his way." She patted the top of his head, bright red nails in contrast against his auburn hair.

It was intriguing to see his dynamic with someone beyond the usual circle. And I couldn't begin to guess where Edward and Millie's paths had converged. They seemed friendly beyond that of Millie and the other patrons, although to be fair she was jovial towards them all.

"This," he began, gesturing toward me with an open hand, "is Isabella Swan. She's agreed to be my date tonight and I could think of only one place worth taking her." _Millie's Thai & Taco?!_ He flashed a big grin at Millie who clasped both hands over her heart and smiled.

"Well, Miss Isabella Swan, I'll see to it this boy shows you one hell of a time." She patted my shoulder and I suddenly felt as though I'd known her for years. I couldn't yet vouch for either the Thai or the tacos, but Millie was definitely something.

I reached to pull a menu out from the edge of the table when I felt Edward's hand grasp my wrist. "Don't bother." Without intending to, my brows furrowed and I started to panic about what I could possibly order without looking at the odd Asian/Mexican hybrid menu. He leaned forward, lowering his voice. "No one orders off the menu and everyone orders the same thing." I looked around, craning my neck to determine what the other tables had on their plates, but one was finished and the others hadn't gotten their food yet.

_Ok, this kid could definitely keep me guessing…_

So far, my experience at Millie's had been one of those instances in which real life was better than any invented story. It was just all so unbelievable. I had a feeling whatever the standard fare around here included would be just as amusing. Just as the thought passed through my head, Millie came out of the kitchen with two steaming plates piled high with the fluffiest pancakes I'd ever seen. They were light and soft looking, each with a melting pat of butter. Following the plates with my eyes was simply unavoidable.

Edward, sitting back in his chair, demonstrated a look of utter contentment. "And _that_ is why we're here Miss Swan." I casually ran my fingers below my lip to check that I hadn't been drooling. Only Edward would know that Millie's Thai & Taco was known for their world renowned pancakes. He gestured toward the table where Millie was chatting with the old couple who had just received their food, "And she'll pretty much add in anything you want. The sky's the limit."

I thought momentarily about testing this claim, but realized quickly that I'm extremely boring when it comes to food. I'd always been a fan of the "Why try something new when you already know what you like?" mantra, although my mother had been driven to her wit's end with that one. She'd have _definitely_ ordered something off the menu here, regardless of the pancakes' popularity.

Despite his "sky's the limit" claim, we both ordered stacks of plain pancakes and coffee. "We'll need it," Edward added afterwards. He winked in my direction, causing heat to climb the sides of my face.

"Honey, hell! Don't embarrass the girl now!" Millie was quickly growing on me, despite highlighting my mortification.

She slipped away, behind the counter, leaving us out of her earshot for the first time since we came in. It might be my only chance: "How do you know her? Aside from here of course." I was consciously controlling my emphases to sound mildly interested as opposed to the insanely curious feeling swirling in the pit of my stomach.

He lifted a hand to rub the back of his neck before resting his elbows on the table and looking me in the eye. "Millie? She answered an ad I placed a few years ago."

Suddenly feeling as though I would vomit, he jumped in to clarify. "In the store where I buy my music stuff. I hung a flyer advertising music lessons." He looked toward the front door as another couple entered, a bell above the door tinkling softly. "I was just tired of asking my parents for money for everything I wanted and needed. I guess it was an attempt at seizing control of my own destiny…_or_ seizing as much of your destiny as a 15 year old can…" He shifted his eyes again to watch Millie arranging coffee mugs. "She called me about her grandson. He lives with her and wanted to play the piano. She told me on that very first phone call that she had scrimped and saved to buy and old, second or third hand upright. She said to me, and of course, you've gotta imagine it sounding just like her, she says 'Honey, if that boy wants to learn himself a little music than that's what he's gonna do.' And I started teaching him that night." He sat back, much more relaxed after having shared his story.

I didn't know how to react after hearing about this whole other side of him. Suddenly, I could picture him sitting at a piano with a child, teaching them the notes with patience and dedication. It made him more endearing, if that was even possible. I smiled simultaneously for Edward, for Millie, for the grandson I knew nothing about. "I think this place is just great." No lip service, I totally meant it.

Falling back on the standard cliché, the pancakes were out of this world. It was kind of fun having breakfast for dinner and it allowed me to momentarily fantasize about what eating a normal breakfast, in the morning, would be like with Edward. I forced myself to cut the dream short to prevent my blush from giving me away.

Instead I changed the subject: "Did Emmett ever make it home last night?"

Edward almost choked on a piece of toast. "Oh! I guess I didn't tell you." He wiped his lips on a napkin before leaning forward, already fully engrossed in the storytelling. "Uh, Alice kinda went insane sometime last night and had a little fun at Emmett's expense. Things are kind of tense around the Cullen house today." He stopped to take another sip of coffee, leaving me on the edge of my seat. "So apparently Jasper reveals that Emmett had threatened anyone who showed any interest in Alice – which explains a lot I guess. So after I hand Alice his keys last night, she goes out to his car with a bottle of pink nail polish and decorates the shit out of the jeep." He tried to hold back his smile, probably realizing that if she had done it to him he'd have to be sedated to fully recover.

"What exactly do you mean by decorated?" _Come on! I seriously needed a visual._

"Well," he bit his lip to keep the laugher in, "maybe decorate implies more design and creativity than what she did. Let's just say the car now has a permanent bumper sticker consisting of the lyrics to that horrible 'Barbie Girl' song that was out a few years back. It's seriously World War III around there right now."

He was a bigger person than me since I held back not one shred of laughter. "Sounds like he deserved it."

Swallowing another big sip of coffee he answered, "Yeah, probably. But my life is going to be _way_ difficult for at least a few days." I pouted in his direction to show my displeasure with his predicament, prompting him to reach across the table and plant his lips firmly against mine. "_That_ definitely helps though."

I couldn't hide my blushing this time, and he reached out to stroke my cheek. "I fucking love when you do that." _Me? _You_ are _so_ the one doing it my friend…_

Once we were full and wired with Millie's double-caffeine special coffee blend, we headed out. "Honey, you better not wait so long before coming to visit me next time!"

He laughed, giving her a bigger smile than I'd seen him give almost anyone. His eyes made contact with mine. "Don't you worry about it, Mil. We'll be back before you know it." I waved on the way out through the rustic screen door, letting it close gently behind me rather than slamming it as I would at home.

So far it had been one surprise after another with this boy. I didn't even bother trying to guess what he had in store next. It was starting to get late, closing in on 10:30 and I wasn't sure what would even still be open at this point. I remembered the trust I committed to him earlier and took a deep breath. _Don't stress yourself out – haven't you learned by now? The boy just doesn't disappoint._

At my insistence he provided a hint as to our destination: "Well," he pulled out his ipod and adapter, handing them to me, "we've got about an hour to drive, and I just _cannot_ listen to you frantically flipping radio stations the whole time." He took my free hand in his, bringing it to his lips and lightly kissing it. _An hour?_ No. Freakin'. Clue.

I scrolled through his never-ending list of music looking for something fun to occupy our time together. I paused at one of my favorite albums that is nothing if not a fun car ride soundtrack. _The Best of the Talking Heads_ had been one of those albums I listened to compulsively back in Phoenix, and seeing it on here made me want to share my love of it with him. I skipped down to "Psycho Killer" as a tribute to Edward, and hit the play button.

It surprised me when he laughed. "_You_ like the Talking Heads?"

"Why so surprised, Mr. Cullen?" I don't know _where_ the sultry tones in my voice came from…

"I'm always surprised with you."

I could live with that answer.

We talked during most of the album, but he couldn't help singing along when "Once in a Lifetime" came on. It was freaking adorable that he knew every word and the exact perfect timing of the lyrics, considering they are mostly spoken rather than sung. He didn't know it was my favorite song on the album which made the whole thing even better.

_You may find yourself living in a shotgun shack  
You may find yourself in another part of the world  
You may find yourself behind the wheel of a large automobile  
You may find yourself in a beautiful house, with a beautiful wife  
You may ask yourself; Well...How did I get here?_

Letting the days go by/let the water hold me down  
Letting the days go by/water flowing underground  
Into the blue again/after the money's gone  
Once in a lifetime/water flowing underground

He seemed a little embarrassed knowing I was watching him so intently, which struck me as humorous seeing as he was a musician, an entertainer.

I traced a finger over his forearm. "This one's my favorite."

His smile was brilliant. "Mine too."

Once we hit "Burning Down the House" we were relaxed, laughing and teasing one another. I could tell as we got closer to our mystery destination he was becoming more and more at ease. While I'd never sang in front of anyone in my life, I matched him line for line midway through.

_All wet yeah you might need a raincoat  
Shakedown thieves walking in broad daylight  
Three hundred sixty five degrees  
Burning down the house_

It was once upon a place sometimes I listen to myself  
Gonna come in first place  
People on their way to work say baby what did you expect  
Gonna burst into flame

My house S'out of the ordinary  
That's right Don't want to hurt nobody  
Some things sure can sweep me off my feet  
Burning down the house

Moments like this were enough to make me think I understood happiness. It was the only word to explain the warm contentment filling my soul. It explained why, despite the fact we were doing nothing, everything was completely and utterly perfect.

I couldn't dwell on things long; we had pulled into a parking lot just off a small street. The strip of shops and small restaurants was the embodiment of "Anytown, U.S.A." and looked like a movie set more than a real town. If I didn't know better, I'd have thought it all a dream.

My eyes scanned the immediate area, trying to understand what we were doing here. Most of the storefronts were dark, long closed. His strong hand clasped around mine, leading me around the corner in front of a movie theatre labeled The Olympia. The marquee was lit up in bold colors. I didn't care what we were doing here, it was just so incredibly beautiful – like going back in time. I turned to face him, prepared to kiss him with all my might, when his smile fell into perplexity.

"Edward?"

He took a step closer, brows knitting further. "This isn't right." Shaking his head and looking around nervously, he continued, "I double checked and triple checked. We were supposed to come see _Nosferatu_ accompanied by a live orchestra. It sounded like fun." He let out a long, deep breath. "_This_ on the other hand…" gesturing a hand towards the building in a very Alice-like fashion.

I allowed my eyes to swing back to the building, prepared for anything. I nearly choked on the laughter exploding from my chest. There, in black and white, spelled out on the marquee, explained his surprise: MIDNIGHT MADNESS – ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW.

"I'm really sorry I made us come all the way out here for nothing." His expression was beyond disappointed.

"Edward, you're crazy. We didn't come here for nothing. I want to go." I watched his eyes focus on the hoard of dressed-in-character fans lined up in front of the ticket booth.

"You do?"

I aimed both pointer fingers back at myself. "Full of surprises, remember?" Grabbing him by the hand, I guided him for once to the back of the line. "It'll be fun!"

His arm lifted, draping across my shoulder and planting a kiss on the side of my forehead. "If you say so."

"Do you trust me?" I aimed the full intensity of my eyes at him, unable to hide my smirk.

"Damn, you're good!" His laugh excited the swarm of butterflies, or were they killer bees, hidden somewhere down deep inside. "I trust you completely."

I hoped Edward didn't notice how much we stood out from most of the people around us. They had bags full of props, costumes, and cliques that all seemed to know one another. Since I had insisted on staying, I felt the pressure to keep him entertained so he wouldn't develop cold feet and back out. I'd seen the movie before, but never in one of these showings. It was pretty evident from his entire demeanor that he'd never seen the film and was surprised as hell when a man showed up in fishnet stockings and high heels.

Pressing my lips to his ear, I whispered, "It's from the movie. Probably nothing out of the ordinary for this group."

It was a relief to see him smile again. "Nah, I don't care. Just suddenly glad this was an accident and not something planned. If I had to dress up this whole night would have gone very differently…" I purposely concentrated on his face, his lips, the tiny freckle on one side, to prevent my mind from accidentally picturing Edward dressed like Dr. Frank N. Furter. I didn't think I could ever recover from that one…

A girl in front of us who seemed to be a couple of years older than us turned in our direction, her bright magenta wig practically burning out my retinas. "So, you guys a couple of virgins?"

We answered hurriedly and in unison: "WHAT?" _Not that it wasn't true or anything… _I suddenly wondered about him.

"Guess that pretty much answers my question." She adjusted her costume in a few places before speaking again. "Virgins are the ones who've never been to one of these before." She gestured again between Edward and myself. "And believe me; you do _not_ want them to know if you are one."

Anxiety filled me before I had finished processing her words. I was relieved when Edward pressed her for more information. "Wait, why not? What will happen?"

"Oh, God!" She cracked herself up into a dry laugh and I couldn't help thinking that Alice would seriously _love_ this chick. "You guys seriously _are_ virgins!" I'd have given anything for her to stop saying that. Her voice lowered to a whisper, trying not to draw unnecessary attention towards us. "They sacrifice virgins before the show. And it's just horrible! It happened to me my first time and I'm _still_ not over it!" From her description of the events the crowd seemed to get off torturing the newbies, labeling their foreheads with a red "V," and making them recite the "Virgin Pledge."

I could sense Edward was preparing to flee the line when I took control of the situation. "Can you help us through it so we don't get singled out? We're on a first date here." I appealed to her sympathy as a woman.

"Well, that's all the more reason I _should_ let you go through it…" she laughed before agreeing to help. "Just stick with me and you'll survive it, ok?" She didn't have to ask me twice.

I wanted to full on kiss this girl once the whole shebang got started! She had introduced herself only as Magenta, like the character from the movie, but had saved us from what would have been the most awkward first date ever. Before taking the "Virgin Pledge" those identified as virgins were instructed to put their right hand in the air, and their left hand "someplace naughty" while repeating the pledge after the ringleader.

We survived by mimicking everything Magenta and her friends were doing, pretending we knew full well what was going on. The pretending was half the fun. Edward and I clung to one another in attempts to catch our breath, the laughter overwhelming us at times. The whole experience was surreal, fantastical, and more fun than I'd ever had in any one night.

So far.

* * *

EPOV

Ok, it wasn't quite what I had planned. All right, it wasn't at _all_ what I had planned. But she had wanted to stay and it was fucking fun as hell to just let loose with someone who doesn't judge, doesn't cower, doesn't sweat the small stuff. _I seriously think I fucking love this girl. _

_Did I just use the "L" word?_

I wasn't sure and took that to as a "no." I'd never loved a girl before and feared I wouldn't know it if I did. A knot in the pit of my stomach suddenly ached.

For a bad movie without a serious plot, I was impressed. I was 100% certain this wouldn't be a weekly occurrence, but it would always be something the two of us shared. I laughed thinking that Magenta would probably tell us we'd lost our virginity tonight. I hadn't been called a virgin so many times in one night apart from Emmett on a drunken rampage. And at least in those instances I could punch him to prompt his silence.

Glancing at my watch I realized it was 2:30, and by the time we drove home I'd have completely blown the "late" timeline indicated to Chief Swan out of the water. One look at the grin across Bella's face demonstrated that she wasn't concerned about getting home late, yet again, or anything at all. She was carefree. And I needed to kiss her.

I stopped her before getting into the car. We were parked further down the street than the other moviegoers, alone in the lot apart from an old Mustang sitting at the far end. "Bella," I didn't know what I planned to say, but her eyes flashed to mine expectantly. "I just –" she interrupted me, reaching up to pull my face to hers, crushing her lips against mine.

My arms wrapped tightly around her body, pulling her to me. The warmth of her body in the cool night made my heart race, and I could taste her fully as she parted her lips for me. It was like having an intensely intimate conversation without uttering a word. We were professing our feelings, sharing things words could never fully describe, exchanging secrets.

Pulling away from her wasn't an option.

The pressure of her chest against me sent my mind reeling, my hands wanting to explore her in ways I shouldn't want to in public. My ability to think was waning, my ability to _feel_ intensifying. I was worried that I'd lose control and ravage her right there, pressed against the side of my car, when a sound startled us both. We disentangled in time to see Magenta and her group of friends strolling past the parking lot singing the "Touch-A, Touch-A, Touch Me" song from the movie in our general direction:

_I was feeling done in, couldn't win  
I'd only ever kissed before.  
I thought there's no use getting into heavy petting  
It only leads to trouble and seat wetting..._

Now all I want to know is how to go  
I've tasted blood and I want more  
I'll put up no resistance, I want to stay the distance  
I've got an itch to scratch, I need assistance

Touch-a, touch-a, touch-a touch me, I wanna be dirty  
Thrill me, chill me, fulfill me  
Creature of the night

We watched them sing and dance their way down the street in silence, although I could spot the familiar flush across Bella's face. I couldn't be sure if it was a result of the singing, or the activity that had prompted their singing, and it didn't matter. Seeing her like that was fucking hot.

I rubbed the back of my neck and ran my fingers nervously through my hair, not wanting to prompt additional teasing from the group. Honestly, I just didn't want to disturb the mood completely, hoping I'd soon have my hands on her again.

They were almost completely past us when Magenta suddenly piped up, calling out the group in a louder than necessary tone: "See those two? They just fucking lost their virginity in there!" _Thanks a lot, Magenta. Mood. Officially. Killed. _

I helped Bella into the car and we started back for Forks. Having a moment of clarity, I was thankful our PDA took place outside of town – if Chief Swan was right about the eyes and ears thing that one would most definitely get back to him.

It was impossible not to look at her, face lit up by stray streetlamps as we passed them by. The word came to me, _bliss_. She was blissful. And if I had anything to do with making her feel that way, I'd keep right on doing whatever I had to to keep her like this. She deserved all I could give her and more. In this moment, I knew definitively that I had mentally used the "L" word earlier…and that pain in my stomach was jolting me into accepting it.

I was definitely falling in love with Isabella Swan.

And there was no way in hell I could tell her. Fuck, I had been barely able to tell myself.

I scrolled quickly through the music lists on the small ipod, looking for something specific that would say everything I couldn't.

_Oh, this is the start of something good  
Don't you agree?_

_  
I haven't felt like this in so many moons  
You know what I mean?_

_  
And we can build through this destruction  
As we are standing on our feet_

_  
So, since you want to be with me  
You'll have to follow through  
With every word you say  
And I, all I really want is you  
You to stick around  
I'll see you everyday  
But you have to follow through_

I wasn't worried about her following through; it was more of a commitment on my end. _I promise, I mean it all, every word. _

She put her hand on mine, and just left it there. There was nothing to be said.

When the song ended, she used her free hand to play it again, and I drove on.

For the time being, I was content just existing with Isabella Swan. Happy to have her next to me. And elated to know that for the foreseeable future, she wasn't going anywhere.

_Oh, this is the start of something good  
Don't you agree?  
_

* * *

**Author's Note: This, by far, was the scariest chapter to write. Please share your feedback, good, bad or indifferent. **

**I promise you all I've got some really fun things coming for this group. If I'm able to do them all justice you'll have a summer filled with laugh-out-loud moments, so please, stick with me! **

**Love you all, and your sexy, sexy reviews!**

**L.**

**Other Songs:  
****The Rolling Stones – You Can't Always Get What You Want  
****Talking Heads – Psycho Killer  
****Talking Heads – Once in a Lifetime  
****Talking Heads – Burning Down the House  
****Rocky Horror Picture Show – Touch-A, Touch-A, Touch Me**

OOPS!!!! How could I forget this one!! Aqua - Barbie Girl


	10. The Way You Make Me Feel

**Author's Note: Hello to all of my sexy, sexy readers! Well the unofficial start to summer is this weekend and I'm just bouncing off the walls with anticipation. I had so much fun writing this chapter, I hope you have just as much fun reading it. **

**I've thanked her before, but big, huge super thanks to ****xsecretxkeeperx**** for recommending me with the update of her latest chapter. Many of you found me thanks to her and I'm really appreciative. Her story, Lessons in Forbidden Love, is an awesome read so check it out! **

**Just a reminder – visit the official Tragic Turn playlist on YouTube. Search for "Tragic Turn" or use the address below:  
****www[dot]youtube[dot]com/view_play_list?p=9228306CFD2726F2**

**SM owns everything Twilight… the music all belongs to whoever it belongs to… the rest of this silly little story is all mine. **

**Best,  
L.**

**Michael Jackson – The Way You Make Me Feel**

* * *

Chapter 10 – The Way You Make Me Feel

BPOV

Expecting sleep after a night like this would be expecting too much. Especially when my waking hours could be so much better than my wildest dreams. And dreams, by their very nature, are fleeting. Tonight was for keeps.

I was content to lie in bed, eyes closed, replaying every detail.

I must have crossed paths with sleep at some point, waking up in the early afternoon with my mind in a fog. At this point, the only benefit of Sunday was that it'd get me one step closer to a Monday lunch date with Alice. And each lunch date with Alice helped to get me one day closer to seeing Edward again. _This _was how I told time lately.

Alice pounced on me before homeroom Monday morning recapping every detail of her Saturday night out with Jasper. I hadn't realized they made plans to go out, apparently I'd been too wrapped up in my own affairs, but I didn't let on; Alice didn't give me a chance to get a word in anyway.

"I mean yeah, ok, I know what you're thinking… dinner and a movie, how original!" She waved her arms enthusiastically with every word. It was like watching some kind of interpretive dance. "But really, it was like this great night. And Bella," she put a hand on my arm, "you wouldn't _believe_ what he said as he walked me up to the door when he dropped me off."

I really hoped she didn't want me to humor her with pointless guessing. That was just _so_ not my style.

"He turns to me, out in front of my house, and looks up at the moon. And I'm like freezing cold and sweating like a pig at the same time, super sexy right? So he goes, 'You want the moon? Just say the word and I'll throw a lasso around it and pull it down.' I mean, Bella, have you _ever_ heard anything like that?"

_Shit._

_Yes, Alice. I hear it annually when they play _It's a Wonderful Life_ on TV every Christmas. There was no freaking way I was taking this one on… _"Sounds like a magical night, Alice."

Normally I would never use a word like magical, instead I'd say great or maybe even special. But magical was much more Alice, and I knew she'd be analyzing my every reaction.

She beamed, obviously delighted with my assessment of their evening. "So what did you guys do? Anything exciting?"

_Yes! I had a magical evening too! I expected none of it and loved all of it! It was perfect! _

"Dinner and a movie for us too."

Gotta love Alice Cullen, but she just wouldn't understand this one. And Edward wasn't the type to fixate on measuring the success of the evening on word-of-mouth. I liked that it was private, a secret between us, and I wanted to keep the brilliance of Millie's pancakes all to ourselves.

* * *

Wednesday during lunchtime Alice was even more off the wall than usual. She was literally bouncing up and down in her seat, but whenever I asked what was up she smirked and practically shouted, "Nothing!" Of course, with Alice nothing was _always_ something.

I tried a little reverse psychology, feigning indifference. Worked like a charm!

"Okay, okay! I'll give you a sneak preview of the big news… or better yet, a teaser!" The bottled up energy exploding out in a sloppy trail of words, "I just came from checking my e-mail and have awesome news for practice tonight. Like unbelievable, Emmett might wet himself if he gets too excited, news! In fact," she took out her phone and wildly texted as she finished her thought, "I'm moving practice up – right after school. I can do that you know!"

"Alice," where to begin? "What's the big news? I mean, you gotta give me something." I really didn't think the news would be big for me, but if it was going to be big for Edward I was definitely interested.

"Let's just say," she deliberately leveled her eyes with mine, "we'll _all_ be affected." She wanted me to know it would matter to me too… and not knowing was torture. She looked from her buzzing phone back to me, "Edward will pick us up and take us right over to Jasper's." _If I survive until then. _

The afternoon crawled by, compounded by Alice's efforts to keep her distance for the remainder of the school day. I had a feeling she didn't trust herself with the information she alone possessed, and, as much as I wanted her to spill it I kind of wanted us all to find out together.

Staring at the clock waiting for the last bell to ring, I suddenly realized that Edward had never seen me in my school uniform. Alice's altered version of the standard issue was well-tailored, fitted, and fashionable. Mine was…not. The plaid skirt seemed to have no shape, the cardigan hung loosely on my frame. I looked like a little girl. _Great, just the impression I'd like to give my incredibly sexy boyfriend. _

Ok, so I just said boyfriend casually, albeit internally. I'd never actually used the term to refer to my life before, unless the phrase "no, I don't have a boyfriend" counts. It felt… nice to say it and mean it. The sound of the bell startled me, practically stumbling out of my seat. _Gotta go meet my boyfriend out front!_

Alice's last class was much closer to the front of the building and she was already in the back seat of the Volvo when I reached the front door, panting from my near-sprint. I stopped before exiting, wanting to seem at least somewhat collected when Edward first saw me. I was pretty sure he could see right through my casual exterior, the chuckles from under his breath audible from the top of the front steps.

He leaned against the passenger side door in a very James Dean like pose. If it had been almost anyone else I'd have thought it contrived, but it was completely natural for him. The only thing missing was the telltale cigarette, but seeing as how he always smelled like soap I was pretty sure that wasn't his style.

We'd been together so many times, but this new situation gave me momentary anxiety. Particularly as I watched his exaggerated elevator eyes scanning me from head to toe. "Nice," he said as I finally approached the car.

I couldn't help returning his fat smirk. "Oh, don't even!"

He pulled the door open. _Of course he did._ "No, I mean it. I'm into this look." Shutting the door before I could answer was probably the result of good planning on his part; whatever came out of my mouth would have only been negative and self-deprecating. And, as Alice was sure to remind us as soon as Edward was back behind the wheel, this was a day for celebration.

Nervously rocking in the back seat, Alice was talking a mile a minute just to distract herself. She started by practicing French verb conjugations and worked her way into historical dates of importance. I had volumes I wanted to say to him, but I didn't like to be so open about our relationship in front of Alice. Although I was pretty sure she didn't get sucked into feeling awkward easily, I didn't want to risk it.

The urge to talk dissipated as his hand, the very one I had been eyeing, dropped to my knee. His warm palm sent a surge of heat out into my body as it made contact with the small bit of exposed skin between my tall knee sock and the hem of my skirt. I allowed myself to think about how unobstructed the path of his hand would be if he decided to make a move. _Make a move?_ Good, Bella. You continue to prove you're ready for intimacy by using language out of 1950's sitcoms. If _that's_ not a sign of maturity… I attempted to personify my little inner voice so I could imagine bitch-slapping her, but it didn't work. Instead, I felt his fingers squeeze me gently, his eyes never leaving the road, and thought I'd pass out.

_Focus. On. Something._ I could hear Alice's small voice, "July 4, 1776 - The 13 colonies in America met in Philadelphia to sign their Declaration of Independence, declaring themselves free of British rule and taxation. July 14, 1789 - The French middle class stormed the Bastille, capturing the royal fortress in Paris and starting the French Revolution. December 7, 1941 - Japan attacks Pearl Harbor by surprise. United States enters World War II. May 17, 2000 – The Beverly Hills 90210 series finale aired causing depression and emptiness for girls all across America…"

My eyes rolled back into my head as his hand swiftly stroked upward, grazing my lower thigh before reaching to undo my seatbelt. It was in one quick movement, so quick in fact that I couldn't be entirely sure whether it was even intentional.

I caught the look on his face as he reached to open his door. _Totally intentional. _

I let him walk around to open my door, unconcerned when my skirt slid upwards an inch or two as I stepped out onto the street. _Hey, I'm an innocent… this is how I get my kicks._ I rationalized that these ridiculous flirting tactics helped to alleviate the sexual tension that seemed to hang in the air whenever we touched. Without them I might build up pressure until I was forced to do something drastic… I couldn't help smiling as he took my hand, completely unaware that I was graphically picturing what that something drastic might be.

Everyone else was there, but no one looked the least bit anxious for the big news. I was only guessing, but it seemed plausible that with Alice a lot of very little things suddenly became "big" news.

The lack of anticipation in the air seemed to immediately bum her out. "Guys! You blow! I mean it this time – there really _is_ big news!" Her eyes went to each of them, saving me for last. I was trying to facially convey as much enthusiasm as possible without looking frightened. She stared intently at Edward, "And for the record I thought finding a hair iron that both straightens _and_ curls _was_ big news!"

Rosalie, draped across Emmett's lap, annoyed me for not even pretending to be interested. She and Alice had been friends forever, and even though I was new to the whole group dynamic thing, supporting Alice was the right thing to do.

"Al, sounds like your pretty serious." Despite the sober tone to his voice, the edges of Edward's lips curled up slightly. He squinted at her with the same look of intense concentration she often used on both brothers, "You better tell us before you spontaneously combust."

"I've got two words for you," She looked from face to face again, building the suspense, "Road Trip."

Emmett's look of confusion seemed to depict what we all were thinking. "Today?"

Alice's restrained excitement spewed out in the form of screechy shouting. "No! Not today! Not tomorrow! What's wrong with you people?" She took a long, deep breath in an attempt to collect herself. "Thanks to my handiwork, and a little bit of PR work on behalf of your Uncle Oscar, you guys are officially booked in this little place in Spokane during Spring Break!" She stamped a foot. "You're Welcome!"

Alice piped up again before anyone could say a word. "Ok, the way I see it we'll be gone Thursday, Friday, and Saturday that week, which means Hales – you better break the news to mommy and daddy, not that they'll care. You guys are so freaking lucky! Cullens, just leave it to me. And Swan," her eyes danced as she turned to me, "you better sweet-talk the hell out of the Chief to get agreement out of him."

I was unable to pay attention to everyone else as I pieced everything together:

_Booking + Spokane + Spring Break = Road Trip with Edward Cullen. _

The only itty, bitty problem seemed to be that whole mess about getting my dad's agreement. Rather than stew about it, I decided to assume it would all work itself out and be happy. I seemed to pick the right emotion; Edward's arms tightly wound around my waist, pulling me to him in a tight hug. Jasper and Emmett immediately got goofy with glee, leaving a deflated Alice. I was prepared to hug her myself, for this and so many reasons, when Edward strutted over, lifting her into a tight bear hug. "Did I ever tell you you're my favorite sister?"

Her smile seemed to indicate she wasn't holding a grudge. "Not often enough!"

So, I had two weeks to win over Charlie. Better get on that…

I got up early the next morning to make his favorite breakfast, the smell of French toast luring him downstairs. _Just laying the ground work…_

* * *

With two pop quizzes on Thursday (I'm surprised they didn't include _that_ on their parental newsletter) and a sheep's heart dissection in bio on Friday morning, I was feeling drained by lunchtime.

"What you need," began an overly perky Alice, "is a good old fashioned girls night." My mind flickered back to the last girls night we'd attempted, not my most successful female bonding experience. She managed to entice me with just five words: "Just the two of us."

I'd been attending band practice during the last few Fridays, but Alice assured me we'd be missing nothing by staying home tonight. Apparently Edward had been downplaying his excitement over the Spokane hullabaloo whenever we spoke; according to Alice it was all he thought about and had been compulsively writing lists of things they had to do, plan, and practice before we left. "Bella, trust me. The only thing you'd see of interest tonight is an alarmingly Nazi-like Edward. Not his most attractive side."

I quickly thought it over, but knew I'd cave. A carefree night with Alice might be just what I needed. Plus, I could use her completely devious mind to brainstorm how in hell I was going to get my dad psyched about letting me go away for a few days. Ok, psyched was way overly optimistic. I'd take tolerant.

I shoved some clothes and basic necessities in a duffel bag. It took some of the pressure off to know that the boys would be out of the house tonight. On most Fridays they practiced or played until late, and it would be better for our girls night if Edward Cullen wasn't one wall away. I didn't pack anything too exciting, just a little bit of makeup for the morning. He'd never seen "morning Bella" before, and if there was any hope of him believing the illusion of me waking up looking fresh and pulled together, I was going to give it a try.

Between periods I'd called Charlie to let him know I'd be spending the night at Alice's. Since he'd had an affinity for Alice after meeting her once or twice in the past, he never questioned me about Edward. _File_ that_ one away, just in case._ I also left a note on the refrigerator, carefully articulated:

_Dad, _

_I just wanted to remind you I'll be with Alice tonight. We both needed a break from all the studying we've been doing. Hope you enjoyed your French toast this morning. I'll have to make it again over the weekend. _

_Love, _

_Bella_

The guys' cars were both gone when I pulled up in front of their house, parking my noisy antique off to the side so as not to embarrass them. No one had ever indicated any displeasure with my monstrosity out front, in fact the Cullens were never less than welcoming, but their beautiful, well manicured front yard looked cluttered with the truck there.

I could see Alice's dark head of hair disappear from her bedroom window as my door slammed shut and knew she'd have the door open before I even got there. "You made it!"

"Alice, when have I _ever_ stood you up?"

She pulled me in, rolling her eyes. "I didn't want you to start today." It was nice that she didn't linger on moments like this; instead she swept me past her parents, both reading in their den, and up to her room.

"Let the party begin!" Love to love you Alice Cullen.

We both put on pajamas. Alice's were a deep rose color and satiny while mine were plain and cotton. She casually draped a light pink scarf around my neck. "Now, how do you feel about nail polish?"

I let her do both my fingers and toes in a dark, witchy color labeled "Wicked."

She was like a professional manicurist, talking a mile a minute as she carefully painted. "You know, we're good girls. People probably take that for granted. Especially our parents." She gestured to the tiny clear bottle filled with dark polish, "This is probably as close to wicked as we'll ever get." Edward's strong hands came to my mind right at that moment causing a deep blush to my ordinarily pale face. It seemed that Alice had noticed when she stopped painting to giggle uncontrollably.

"What?"

"Bella, you _so_ have a wicked side you're just waiting to unleash!" The blush deepened as I pictured his hand back on my knee as it was this afternoon. Even though he wasn't home, it was hard to know that everything that belonged to him was only feet away.

"Alice Cullen!" What do you say when you're accused of something you may actually be guilty of? I smiled, saying nothing further on the matter.

After my nails had hardened to a shiny finish, I was starting to get a craving. "Alice, got any of the good stuff here?" During school we'd frequently discussed the closet habit we both shared, another thing to bond over.

I loved asking her questions like this, so seemingly simple yet able to fill her with such delight. "Oh you _know_ I do!"

We crept through the way too quiet house, yet another indicator of the boys' absence, and out into the extremely organized garage. Alice must have noticed my wonderment at their clean-enough-to-eat-off-of workbench and coordinating shelves. "Between my mother's compulsive tendencies and my father the doctor, organization makes them very happy." She led us to the far corner, into a lower cabinet. Opening the cabinet door revealed my shock and delight. A tiny, dorm room sized mini-fridge had been hidden away.

"Emmett?" This _had_ to have been his brainchild.

Alice nodded her head of dark, shiny hair. "Well it was his idea for the fridge to _exist_, it was Edward's to hide it here."

She crawled down low, almost entirely into the little cubby. I heard her open the small fridge door, coming out with the object of our desire. Both our eyes glazed over starting at it, craving the release it would bring us.

The long cold tube seemed to shimmer in her hands. "Alice, you've never looked sexier than you do right now!"

Her laughter made me smile. "Well everyone looks sexy holding a tube of cookie dough!" _I agree 100%! _

Apparently, being the gourmet that she is, Mrs. Cullen hated premixed and prepackaged foods. Alice had told me on numerous occasions that her mother's cookie philosophy was that they should be "prepared and baked with love" rather than mixed by high volume machinery. Growing up with a woman who couldn't make jell-o, the tube of dough was a personal favorite. It reminded me of goofy nights with my mom, her quirky way of doing things, and how infrequently any of the dough actually made it into the oven.

We grabbed forks as we passed back through the kitchen, heading upstairs. "I think you were right Alice, I _so _needed a girls night." We plopped onto the pile of floor pillows we'd scatted across her room, each digging into half of the tube. "You know, even if boys _could_ understand this ritual, it just wouldn't be the same."

"Amen to that!" Alice clinked her fork against mine as if giving a toast. "And I've gotta tell you, Rosalie's just like one of the boys in that respect. She's no fun to pig out with!"

I was sure this wasn't an insult besides the insinuation that I was a good pig-out partner. Rather than argue the point, I did the next best thing – digging a fork back into the softening mess of sweet chocolate chip cookie dough. I wondered if Dr. and Mrs. Cullen knew about the kids' late night binges. And if they did know, were they aware how innocent it all was? Most parents were worried about pot or booze, or worse… if they knew their biggest concern was junk food they should be counting their blessings.

We were both stuffed beyond the point of full, the sight of the now melting dough making us nauseous. "Alice, where do you hide the evidence?"

She scooped up the leftover mess in a big ball of paper towels. "Simple. It all goes into Emmett's bedroom garbage. No one would dare look in there for _anything_." She disappeared out into the hall with the trash, coming back empty handed.

"Izzy," ok, no one in my whole life had ever called me that, but from her it was kind of cute, "level with me. Is there _any_ chance you'll be allowed to come with us to Spokane?" She ran her fingers through the side of my hair, attempting to weave strands into an informal braid.

I thought of Charlie, and how moderate he'd been so far. He was beyond nice to Edward last week and had only put his foot down out of necessity and parental guilt from my mother. If I mentally prepared him before asking the question, and then asked in just the right way, I felt the odds of agreement were mostly in my favor. "I'd give it 70/30 odds of a yes right now… but I'll be steadily working on raising those numbers."

She stopped fidgeting with my hair and faced me. "I sure hope you work some magic. We need you!" I couldn't imagine what this group, who all had known each other forever, could possible need me for. In fact, I quite suspected it was actually me in need of them.

We took a few relationship quizzes out of Alice's large collection of backlogged magazines and determined that her relationship style was that of a "Whirlwind Wooer" while mine was that of a "Hopeless Romantic." I had never put much stock in this kind of thing, assuming a bunch of office assistants sat around making up the questions and corresponding answers. In reading the description of my category though, I suddenly allowed myself to believe, albeit momentarily, that I'd stumbled into some truth:

_A hopeless romantic dreams of who she will spend the rest of their life with and what the two of them will do together. She wants to be romanced with sweet simple things and thoughtful amazing surprises. She dreams of being loved but also loving somebody. She doesn't just want somebody to hold her. She also wants to hold someone. She realizes that love isn't just about one person but both people. She is hopelessly in love with being loved and loving back._

As I finished reading the description over for the second time, I thought of Edward's face – smiling that famously lopsided smile, and how lucky I was to have found someone who was able to instill hope into my hopeless romantic side.

Alice justified that to counteract the "toxifying" effect of eating junk food we should use clarifying face masks to "draw out our impurities." We scrubbed our faces in the twin bathroom sinks, a fresh vase of hydrangeas between them. She helped me apply the dark green goop across my warm face, tingling over every surface. "That means it's working!" After applying her own, we trooped back down the hall to pop in a movie. Although the directions said the mask only needed 20 minutes to work, Alice said a full hour was necessary if wanted a true detox experience.

It was after two by this point, and I was unable to decide if an hour with this hardening stuff on my face was worth its potential healing properties. I left it on, staring at the TV screen blankly, willing my eyes to stay open.

Apparently I lost that battle, big time. I woke up to find the gloomy morning already in full force. While her wall clock said 10 a.m. it was hard to believe – it still felt so early. An attempt to yawn quickly reminded me of the green shell that had been on my face for the past eight hours. I hoped Alice would have woken me if there was a chance of ODing on this stuff.

I sat up, spying Alice's washed face lightly resting on her pillow. My back made a cracking noise as I stretched. _Thanks for waking me up to de-Frankenstein_ _myself!_ I was prepared to throw a pillow at her, waking her up with a jolt, but even in sleep she radiated kindness. I couldn't do it.

I took my small makeup bag, hair brush, and a fresh outfit with me, silently creeping out of her room to initiate my morning plan. I figured a good scrubbing to get rid of the mask, plus a little makeup and a few minutes on my hair would be enough to convince everyone I was one of those "natural beauties" who woke up looking good.

Of course, my plan didn't include literally running into Emmett before Alice's door was completely shut behind me.

"Shit, what the fuck did you two _do_ last night?"

No amount of clever hand placement could hide my green, lumpy face and one hand up to my hair indicated that wasn't a pretty picture either.

I grimaced at him, treating him less like a friend and more like a big brother. I guess I saw him through Alice's eyes in that way. "What are the odds of running into you when I'm at my very worst?"

He was crumpled, wearing jeans and a t-shirt. I was pretty sure he'd slept that way. "About as good as the odds of running into Edward at your very worst if you're headed for the bathroom. He's showering or putting on makeup or whatever it is he does in there." It was a relief to see him continuing his groggy shuffle down the hallway without continued harassment; Alice must pull this look around the house all the time. But before I could enjoy an ounce of relief, I was swept up in the panic of Edward stepping out to see my hideous morning look. It was, in fact, the exact opposite of my plan.

I prepared to run back to Alice's room to hideout when I heard a noise coming from the bathroom. _No, not that kind of noise._ Something pleasant, familiar. When it came to Edward certain things just always seemed familiar. And he was most definitely in the bathroom singing. I didn't know if he'd been doing it earlier, too frightened by my hallway encounter to notice something like shower singing.

_Oh. My. God._ More important than the singing was the shower part. On the other side of the door that I had not only approached but pressed my ear to, was my boyfriend in the shower. He was irresistible fully clothed in a heavy winter jacket; comparatively the shower image was almost too much to bear. Not that I hadn't thought about it – many, many times – but knowing it was actually happening only a few feet away added a certain something to the fantasy. Realism perhaps?

And now that the visual, as close as my very active imagination would let me get, was very securely in place, I could focus on his voice. He'd unexpectedly switched songs, belting it out over the loud sound of the streaming water. When I realized what it was, I almost blew my cover – biting my lip to hold the laughter in. He allowed his voice to get high pitched, for him, but still pitch perfect. If it had been another song it might have been beautiful, but instead it was hilarious.

_Hey pretty baby with the high heels on  
You give me fever like I've never, ever known  
You're just a product of loveliness  
I like the groove of your walk, your talk, your dress  
I feel your fever from miles around  
I'll pick you up in my car and we'll paint the town  
Just kiss me baby and tell me twice  
That you're the one for me_

The way you make me feel  
You really turn me on  
You knock me off of my feet  
My lonely days are gone

If I'd been strong enough I was pretty sure my head would have pushed through the door considering the amount of force I'd been using to keep my ear against it. I could hear his voice, along with his movements, trying to imagine what was going on on the other side of the door.

I didn't have to wait long for an answer. Apparently the pressure I'd been placing on the door, along with a misplaced hand on the doorknob, was exactly enough to send the door flying open and my entire body down onto the bathroom floor like a sack of potatoes. I wasn't sure if the scream I heard was in my head or actually out loud, but to call the moment a surprise was less-than-accurate.

To call the look on his face astonishment was the understatement of the year. Although I wasn't looking at his face for long.

My timing was good, if there ever was a good time to fall through a bathroom door on someone. Catching him in the shower would have been awkward, although the clear glass doors were pretty steamed up, and catching him completely naked would have been mortifying on my end, although I suspected not so much on his. But instead, he stood dripping fresh from the shower, with a fluffy beige towel cinched at his waist.

From my view on the floor, the beads of water clinging to his hair seemed to put a golden halo around his head. I must have been staring for longer than I realized, since he felt compelled to clear his throat.

"Uh, looking for something?" He had relaxed enough for a smile to play across his lips, leaning casually with one side up against the wall.

I couldn't help staring at the loose knot holding his towel together as I stood. I didn't know what I would say, but catching my own reflection in the mirror would have scared the words out of me anyway. The green mask, now visibly cracked in several places, combined with the wild hair had completely undermined any semblance of the plan I had been intending to carry out with my trip into the hall in the first place. My reflection was like that of an angered Medusa, but instead of turning Edward into stone, I seemed to initiate a fit of hysterical laughter.

"What did my sister _do_ to you?" His changing of the subject seemed to break the ice enough to slow my racing heart to more of a trot.

"Why? Don't you like my new look?" I moved closer to him, wondering if the steam was melting what was left of my brain.

He brought a hand to his face, stroking his chin in mock concentration. "Actually I hate that she tricked you into putting that mud crap all over yourself. What could you possibly need that for?"

I shrugged my shoulders. "Face detox, according to Alice."

He bent to pick up my stuff, all of which had been strewn across the white tile floor with my graceful entrance. "I like your face how it was. Toxic or not."

I wasn't a pervert or anything, it wasn't like I was craving a peek at the goods, ok maybe a little bit, but my eyes just couldn't stray from the spot where the towel met his strong midsection for very long. I remembered the first day, in the rain, my eyes following the drops of water as they traced their way along his contours. I seemed to be doing the same thing now, each one stopping at the beige towel. _Maybe I _am_ a pervert…_

I pretty much stood like a statue, afraid to move or speak. The moment seemed fragile in its very existence and I didn't want to be the one to burst the bubble. I didn't notice I'd been smiling until he brought it up. "Well, I'll let you take care of your little incredible hulk situation here." He moved a hand to the side of my face, despite the gross green layer. "I could get used to seeing this smile first thing in the morning."

By the time I had been able to confirm that was really what he said, he was gone.

I fixed myself up to a clean, made-up, detoxified standard – prepared to run into anyone who might now be lurking in the hallway – only to find that the house was eerily quiet. Alice, now sitting up in her large, fluffy bed confirmed the absence of everyone else. Glancing out the window to the now empty driveway, I must have been quick to show my disappointment.

"Gee, thanks! If my brother's not home there's no reason to be here, huh?" Her tone made it difficult to tell if she was kidding. I hoped she was.

"No, Alice. That's not it, I swear. I'm just kind of disappointed he didn't tell me he was going."

"Izzy, cut the kid some slack. He's just following the rules." _Ok, this would need further clarification. _

"What are you _talking_ about?"

Sheepishly, like a child who'd inadvertently spilled the beans, she calculated the damage of what she'd said. "Well…" I wanted to go all "Judge Judy" on her and emphasize that "well" is not an answer, but I just couldn't get angry with this girl.

"Alice, it's ok. Just let me in on the secret."

She patted the spot next to her on the bed, encouraging me to join her. I climbed up, melting into the fluffy layers. "I was afraid that if you started dating my brother you'd stop being my friend." The girl who loved to dance around any topic of conversation really laid it all out for me on this one. "Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but eventually. I kind of guilted him into making up a set of ground rules we'd follow if you were here. I didn't want him to steal you away."

Just knowing she was concerned about potentially losing our friendship was touching. I wasn't mad, or upset, or frustrated. I threw my arms around her neck, hugging her to me as a sign of support and comfort. "Alice, that won't happen. And if a silly set of rules make you feel better about that, then I'm on your side." I reclined into the comfortable bed I should have been dozing in last night. "However, if you start plotting and scheming behind my back ever again I'll smear green goo on your face and throw you into Jasper's bathroom while he's taking a shower…"

The perplexity shined through her eyes. "Nevermind. Long story."

***

EPOV

The only way to combat the guilt associated with my own thoughts was to leave the house completely. Even though there really wasn't any reason to feel guilty.

I'd always been repulsed whenever Alice would go beauty mental and smear brightly colored tubes of crap all over her face. Seeing Bella roped into it was kind of cute in its own way. It would have been nice if it hadn't been such a surprise. Surprise was definitely the right word, or perhaps shock. And since I left her in the bathroom I couldn't help the direction my torrid thoughts were taking.

The idea of her nearly catching me in the shower led me to wonder what the opposite scenario would be like. Just putting Bella's name in the same sentence as the word shower sent a warm wave through my body. When I pictured it I wasn't covered in green slime or in any other kind of embarrassing situation. Instead, I walked in purposefully to catch her in the act. It was only too easy to imagine her shapely silhouette standing out from the steamy layer forming on the glass doors. In my version I called out her full name, capturing her attention with a breathy, "Isabella." She slid open the door, just a bit, smiling and beckoning me forward. With every step, she slid the door back a bit, showing me a bit more of her wet, soft skin…

That was pretty much the moment I knew I had to get out of there. Out of the house, the state, the country… ok so that wasn't really possible. But if I didn't put some distance between me and that girl I was not going to be able to control myself. And whether she _wanted_ me to control myself was irrelevant, I'd promised Alice I'd stay away.

Images of Alice actually helped to sober me up enough to find my way to the music store to kill some time. One of the benefits of having a sister – they help to erase any sexual thought you may be having at any time.

To be fair, the shower fantasy didn't rank in the top ten graphic thoughts I'd had of Bella. Late at night, lying in bed, I always seemed to find something to think about worth staying awake for. This one seemed to riddle me with guilt because she was so close. And proximity makes the heart grow fonder… maybe it wasn't the heart I was thinking of…

I sat on the old, rickety stool in the small store's back corner playing the owner's collection of vintage guitars. I'd known Doug Shooter since my dad brought me in to have Opal restrung when I turned 10. The guy was this old hippie type who collected guitars worth unbelievable amounts and wore clothes that looked like they were from the dollar store. He kept the road map from his 1969 trip to Woodstock behind Plexiglas while his guitars were all available, leaning into cheap stands. He'd have let anyone play if they only asked, but anyone who knew anything about guitars would have been too afraid to ask. The stool was always empty, and I always sat there just soaking up everything this classic collection had to offer.

The good news was that it was great for thinking. The bad news was that it was great for thinking. It crossed my mind that the distractions of planning for Spokane might actually be a blessing in disguise. While, if given the choice, I'd have spent every waking moment with Bella, my feelings for her were becoming more intense than I could have imagined and the urges corresponding with these feelings were getting harder and harder to control. The fact that I wanted to control them at all told me just how important she was.

Bella Swan was worth waiting for.

I was pretty sure the next several days wouldn't be difficult. We'd see each other on our regular days, talk every night, and I'd probably revert back to even more intense late night fantasizing. But all that I could handle.

Suddenly the three days and two nights we'd be spending out of town worried me tremendously. My fantasy morphed into a cheap hotel room, supervision free, with a misty steam spewing from an open bathroom door. I didn't have to let the scene play out; I knew right where it was headed.

* * *

**Author's Note: If you enjoyed it, please hit that lovely little review button and let me know! (If you hated it, same goes for you!) **

**I honestly couldn't do what I'm doing without all of your support. It just blows me away week after week. If you'll keep reading, I'll keep writing! **

**3,  
L.**_  
_


	11. Paradise by the Dashboard Light

**Author's Note: I was worried about finishing this chapter when I started it on Monday…little did I know I'd be writing it TWICE! I wasn't sure of where I wanted to take something so I wrote two – that's right, two – versions of Chapter 11. Ultimately, I think I knew which version I'd be posting all along… **

**Thanks to all of my incredible readers and reviewers! You guys continue to amaze me! **

**Enjoy!**

**L.**

**SM owns everything **_**Twilight**_**, but I'm proud to say this little story is mine! **

**Meatloaf – Paradise by the Dashboard Light**

* * *

Chapter 11 – Paradise by the Dashboard Light

EPOV

The whole shower thing opened up this avenue of dirty thoughts I never knew existed. And once you know it exists you just can't _un_-know it. The mind just doesn't work that way.

I developed a strategy for maintaining my cool - keep Alice with us as often as possible. I didn't want to rush her into anything and I was starting to doubt that I could refrain much longer. To my surprise, it annoyed Alice long before it annoyed Bella. I guess she _is_ entitled to a life of her own no matter how inconvenient it may be for me at times.

When I spoke to Bella Monday night, I decided to try and talk to her about what I was feeling. It wasn't something I enjoyed doing, or something I'd ever had to do before, but if it was possible at all it would have to happen over the phone. Seeing her just stirred up too much.

"I've been working on Charlie for almost a week now, and I'm _almost_ ready to ask him. I think my odds are pretty good." Her voice was genuinely optimistic, not a trace of sarcasm anywhere.

"That's great, Bel. If anyone can get him to agree, you can. And _maybe _Alice if you get really desperate."

"Yeah, we've already discussed it, she's my Plan B."

I could keep up the small talk a bit longer, but it would only delay the inevitable. "Hey, um, Bella. I've got to talk to you about something that's kind of hard for me." _Hard? Nice word choice. God, I'm an idiot sometimes… _

"Edward? Is everything ok?" I could hear worry in her voice this time, which devastated me. She should never have to worry on my account.

"No, no everything is ok. Don't worry." I paused, which I knew was a mistake. It only added drama where drama was the last thing I really needed. "I just think about you a lot lately." Ok, that sounded safe. Better ease into this one.

It sounded like she was smiling through the phone. "Is there something wrong with that?" I could tell she was thinking before continuing. "I mean, I think about you too… a lot." The way she said it was so effing cute I couldn't stand it. I wanted to kiss her, to pull her against me… STOP! This is the whole reason we're even having this discussion.

I tried to think of how to say the things I'd been intending to say but found myself at a total loss of words. So I did what any self-respecting man would do – I chickened out. "No, nothing wrong at all. I just wanted to let you know."

Her voice kicked up an octave into this cute, squeakier version of her normal voice. "You sound like you're smiling."

Well whaddaya know! "Yeah, I totally am."

"Me too." I knew it before she even said it.

When we finally hung up, I felt better and more frustrated at the same time. Hearing her voice always seemed to soothe me and any insecurity I may be feeling, but hearing her voice only makes me picture her which makes my imagination run wild…

I lay in bed that night, trying to understand how a normal guy would deal with these feelings. For some reason Emmett's face kept popping into my head, and I sure as shit didn't want to attempt to handle this situation as he would. He'd use a little bit of guilt, a lot of persuasion, and a few peeks at his greased up muscles to get her into bed. Not to say he'd always been a total player, but I could tell that if he ever stopped seeing Rosalie he'd probably capitalize on any opportunity that surfaced. It all probably stemmed from the fact that Rosalie seemed to fulfill his every need just when he needed it. That spoiled bastard.

I thought it, but I didn't really mean it. I knew instinctively that I'd wait forever if it was what she wanted. And the minute I'd been able to officially recognize this was the minute I knew I'd never again pressure her, never make her do anything she wasn't ready for, and she'd have to actually come out and tell me she was ready. Coming to terms with things was unbelievable, an epiphany. And apparently experiencing an epiphany negated my ability to sleep since I felt compelled to get out of bed.

I sat on the floor, gently lifting Opal out of the stand next to my desk. Leaning against the side of my bed, just as I had the night I thought I'd dreamt Bella up, I realized just how real everything with her was now. I pushed the door closed with one foot and started to play softly. I imagined her face, that smile, the eyes, the scent. I played from the heart.

_I keep a close watch on this heart of mine  
I keep my eyes wide open all the time  
I keep the ends out for the tie that binds  
Because you're mine, I walk the line_

I find it very, very easy to be true  
I find myself alone when each day is through  
Yes, I'll admit that I'm a fool for you  
Because you're mine, I walk the line

Johnny most definitely got it right. When you find a girl worth waiting for, it makes walking the line less of a chore and more of a duty.

Before attempting to turn in again, I picked up my cell, needing to express my awakening to Bella. I knew she wouldn't necessarily understand the intention behind my message, but I felt like it had to be said: _I'd wait for you forever._

When I woke up the next morning I found a reply waiting for me: _I won't make you wait quite that long. _

Maybe Bella Swan was more intuitive than I ever gave her credit for.

On Wednesday I asked Emmett to pick up Alice from school, opting to wait next to Bella's truck for her to come out. I didn't want to wait until tonight's practice to see her, or maybe I _couldn't_ wait until tonight's practice. She was just consuming me lately and I couldn't stay away if I wanted to.

Her eyes grew large as they met mine from across the lot. I sat on the hood of my car, feet resting on the front bumper. She smiled and practically ran towards me, her hair blowing back behind her. I was so used to her attempts at suave collection whenever she was near me that it was nice to see her like this. Maybe the whole incident in the bathroom had been a turning point, maybe she'd put her self-consciousness behind her and realized she'd always be the most beautiful girl in the world to me. _Nice thought, but highly unlikely._ I stood to meet her, but she didn't stop as I'd anticipated. Instead she ran into me, flinging her arms around my neck, knocking us both over onto the hood of my car.

"Ms. Swan, I believe you're trying to seduce me." The words came out semi-muffled since she'd knocked the wind out of me momentarily. I rested my hands on the back of her hips, holding her in place instead of letting her slip sideways off the hood. My hold was loose enough that she could easily stand if she wanted to, but I suspected she didn't want to.

"Maybe I am, Mr. Cullen. Is that a problem for you?" She used that breathy voice, riddled with confidence, which just did awful things to me.

I tried to ignore those very awful things long enough to respond, however my "No, no problem at all" came out with a slight crack in my voice. I'm sure she found that absolutely sexy. To deflect attention I pushed my lips to her forehead, kissing it with a loud smack, and pulling us both up to stand.

She instantly became excited, and I made a mental note that she enjoyed my impromptu visit. "Why are you here? Is everything ok?" I loved that that was her automatic question. She was always anticipating doom and gloom of some kind.

_Perfect, now that you're here._ "Everything's fine, don't worry so much! I just wanted to see you." _What I mean is I _have_ to see you, or I'll completely lose my mind. _I'd managed to keep my hands in place, relishing the fact that she liked them there.

She stood up on tiptoes to put a soft kiss on my lips. "Don't hate me, but I have bad news. I've been afraid to tell you."

Probably the worst case scenario was going through my mind when I dialed myself back. Seventeen years of life with Alice often told me that women had a way of exaggerating these things. I gave her a fully attentive look, waiting for her to explain. "So," she dragged it out nice and long, "I may have to bail tonight." She cringed, closing her eyes, afraid of my reaction.

It was definitely one of disappointment, but nothing she should fear. "Why? What's up?"

I felt shivers rush through my body as she slipped a hand halfway into my back pocket. It was a risky move and she knew it, so I let my smile remind her that she had permission to put her hands anyplace. "Well, I'm working on my plan to get permission for the road trip and I suspect a self-imposed study exile might really push him over the edge." I couldn't stop watching her lips as she spoke. "And I figure you'd gladly give up one night with me to have three days of me next week, right?"

She presented an argument I couldn't contest. I let my lips move to her ear, "You do whatever you have to do to get him to agree." I kind of regretted my words, they sounded a little bit like pressure, but she didn't seem to notice.

She whispered back against my ear – well really more against my neck – "I'm _so_ there."

I stepped back away from her before I could get too riled up and looked her up and down. It was starting to get warmer and her skirt seemed the slightest bit shorter than it was the other day. Or maybe I was imagining it. I kissed her lips, but quickly. If I took my time things could easily get out of hand. "I'll call you later tonight, ok?"

She nodded and I turned to get into my car before calling out to her again: "And I wasn't kidding," I gestured towards her uniform with one hand, "I'm _really_ digging this." She laughed that distinctive Bella laugh that warms my heart and I caught a waft of her scent on the passing wind. She put up one hand in a motion of goodbye and it killed me to ever have to say goodbye to her. I mirrored the motion back in her direction before driving away.

* * *

BPOV

As if I didn't have enough motivation to go on the road trip, Edward shows up at school and reminds me that not going is not an option. Ok, maybe that wasn't his reminder, maybe it was something I surmised sometime between the moment his hands first rested on my hips and the moment he whispered, in his sexiest of voices, into my ear.

I'd spent most of the day reflecting on the text I'd gotten from him late last night. I'd been in the lightest stages of sleep when my phone blinked to life and I couldn't resist the urge to see what was up. It was a toss-up whether it would have been from Alice or Edward, but seeing Edward's name knocked every bit of sleep out of me. His message, _I'd wait for you forever_, didn't really make sense. For all intents and purposes he _had_ me; no waiting required.

Lying in bed, I rolled the phrase over and over in my head, desperate to assign meaning to it. I allowed my thoughts to creep back to the bathroom incident, trying to discern if his comment related to something from then. I couldn't really tell; I was too preoccupied with the towel… I _always_ got hung up on the towel. Just thinking about that towel and the spot where it landed on his strong hips brought a flush of heat through my body.

I suddenly knew what he meant.

And I was positive the wait wouldn't be quite as long as he'd assumed, although his willingness to wait was charming. I toyed with the idea of not being entirely forward about my feelings, letting him sweat it out. But thinking of the new warmth he'd been causing for me quickly brought out my sympathetic side. It would ease his mind to know that I understood his comment and that we were on the same page.

_I won't make you wait quite that long. _And I meant it. My feelings for him were intense, for sure, but concrete, something real. And when I was ready for more he'd be the very first to know.

***

My truck and I seemed to be on good terms since it had been taking me to and from school without any problems worth writing home about. I thought about it and realized that it was really all I could ask of the old girl.

My dad had been working pretty regular hours lately, and tonight was no exception. He'd be home in another hour and a half, and I wanted to lay it on really thick. Alice had recommended continuing my food campaign since, as she put it, they didn't invent the phrase about getting to a man through his stomach just for fun. She recommended a few dishes that sounded pretty fancy, but I decided on a really simple homemade lasagna recipe. I'd picked up the ingredients on the way home and got to cooking right away.

I was in the chef zone when my phone started buzzing like crazy, vibrating against the countertop. Edward.

_I just wanted to wish you good luck with the Chief. I'll talk to you later. _

I glanced at the clock to be sure I was okay on time before texting him back.

_You should see me – all domestic and everything! It would really entertain you. Thanks for the luck, I'll need it! _

The lasagna just needed another layer of cheese and sauce before going into the oven, which I quickly prepared and slid in. I went to work cleaning up everything I'd used and the little splatters that always seemed to turn up no matter how careful I was. Just as I put the last clean bowl into the drying rack, the small phone came to life again. He had probably just gotten to practice and guilty feelings surged through me for not being present. I took a breath as I hit the button bringing up his message on the small screen.

_Not the same without you. Not even close._

A little something inside melted as I read his words, and I wanted to write him back – but I heard my dad's car in the gravel driveway and I knew he'd want me to focus on my task at hand.

I took his coat and hung it on a peg by the door before guiding him into the living room to catch up on the day's events. He didn't seem to notice anything out of the ordinary until the smell of lasagna crept into the room.

"Bella, what are you up to?"

I'd been prepared for this. "Dad, I'm not up to anything. Don't be so suspicious. I just wanted to have a good meal in you before I launch into study mode. I'm planning to stay in the rest of the week to focus on a few upcoming projects."

I'm glad I hadn't shared this information while we were eating since I'm pretty sure he would have choked. "Really?"

Doing my homework to prepare for this conversation was definitely helping. I remained calm and casual as I pulled the now finished tray from the hot stove. "Of course, why would I lie? I know it's important to you that I focus on school, and I don't want to let you down." That little beauty was a bit of Alice's crafty thinking.

He came to the table and we ate together, in a civilized fashion, whereas we normally ate separately, barely crossing paths. While part of the whole night was an attempt to butter him up, it was genuinely nice to spend some time together. We talked about things going on down at the station, people I barely remembered from my time here growing up, and eventually the conversation rolled around to Edward.

"Things getting serious with the Cullen boy?" Cringing was unavoidable. The line of questioning itself was awkward enough, but calling him "the Cullen boy" made it even more embarrassing. I mean, it sounded like we were ten years old or something. To me, he was Edward Cullen and everything about him was just magnetic, sexy, and charming.

"Dad, please don't call him that." I wasn't sure how much I wanted him to know based on the upcoming question I'd be forced to ask him. He rolled his eyes and I couldn't help laughing. It was nice when I could see the traits I got from him, and the eye rolling was a biggie. "Things are…good, with us." It was vague enough to answer his question.

I didn't expect to see him smiling, so it kind of caught me off guard. "You seem happy, Bells. I was worried you wouldn't be."

It was a shock to feel myself blushing. "Dad, I'd be lying if I said Edward wasn't helping with the transition, but you're doing a great job." This wasn't an attempt to blow smoke up his ass, it was for real.

My answer seemed to make him happy so I made an in-the-moment decision to go for it right then and there. "You know, Alice has arranged something for the week we're off from school. She invited me to go."

Wait for it… wait for it…

"Oh yeah? _Alice_ put this, this…thing together you said?" I couldn't tell if he was grilling me or just asking out of curiosity.

"Yeah, it's kind of a road trip. To Spokane." Alice had also drilled into my head that I should reveal information slowly, allowing him time to process. I decided to give it a try even though my father, the cop, could probably see right through me.

When he said nothing after a few moments I went on. "She is kind of in charge of scheduling for the band her brothers are in and they're playing a show out there. A friend of the family helped to set things up." My calm, detailed explanation was convincing. I mean of course it was all true, but hearing it out loud made it all seem believable – like I had a shot.

"Bella," ok, still can't tell if this is good or bad, "you've always been responsible and made good choices. I've never had reason to doubt you." _Ok Dad, please just get to the point – the suspense is killing me!_ I watched him take another big bite of lasagna – it could only help at this point. "But I'm just not comfortable with this."

Worst. Case. Scenario._ Shit!_ I had prepared for "let me think it over," but never in a million years did I think I'd get a flat out "no."

"Are you kidding me? You won't even think about it?" I could feel that bratty whine creep into my voice – the one I knew would get me absolutely nowhere. My reaction was so far beyond my control that, despite every fiber of my being urging me to shut up, I still spat out under my breath, "You are _so _unfair."

That was it. _R.I.P. Bella Swan, hope your seventeen years have been good to you… _

"Unfair?" He actually rose from his seat, glaring down at me as his voice tensed into a place somewhere between shouting and yelling. "Isabella Swan if you want a taste of unfair I can certainly provide that. But if I was you, I'd stop before I keep you in this house indefinitely."

I wanted to yell back at him, more than I'd ever wanted to yell at anyone before. I wanted to throw in his face that he'd only been parenting me for a few months, and his attempt at controlling me would only backfire. I wanted to hurt his feelings, to make him feel that little bit of heartache he had embedded in my chest with his disproval. But instead I sulked up to my bedroom, loudly shutting the door, and cried.

I was afraid to speak to Edward that night, unsure how to even broach the subject. I had given him good odds that I'd be able to go and, as it turns out, I was a total liar. It would be even worse having to tell Alice since she'd probably be scheming alternate plans to win over my dad – a feat I just couldn't face at this point. When my phone lit up indicating Edward's impending call, I cautiously answered – attempting to hide the sound of my waning sobs.

"What's wrong?" He could sense it before I even said "hello."

"Looks like I won't be able to make it next week." I tried to sound as calm and collected as possible, but it was a veiled attempt at best.

I could tell he was surprised, not quite expecting the news. "What happened?"

"The Chief just doesn't feel 'comfortable' with the plans, so he'd rather keep me sheltered in this house than accept the fact that he'll have to trust me at some point."

It didn't take a clairvoyant to tell that Edward was disappointed; his voice changed keys and became almost monotone. But at the same time, he seemed to be defending the decision. "He just wants to protect you, Bella. I can't fault him for that. If I thought you were doing something potentially dangerous or risky I'd probably get crazy overprotective too." And it was true, I knew he would.

"I just really wanted to go, to spend the time with you." I took a few breaths before adding, "All of you really." In this short while the whole group had become important to me, each member in their own way. And being the one who would be left out just wasn't acceptable.

I tossed and turned most of the night, even after Edward's reassurances that I wouldn't be missing much. By the time my alarm went off in the morning I felt like I'd been awake all night. It was the white slip of paper taped to my door that caught my attention, perking me up enough to get out of bed.

_Bella, _

_I know it isn't easy, but please trust that sometimes I know what's best. _

_Dad_

I'd love to say his obviously guilt-riddled note left me feeling better in any way, shape, or form – but it only seemed to make things worse. It appeared there was no way he'd change his mind on this one.

When I first saw Alice the next morning she was already seated at our lab table, a sad, sympathetic look across her face. I knew Edward would have told her – to be honest it took some of the pressure off of me. And, as always, she did just the right thing: threw an arm around my shoulder and rested her head against mine. "Don't worry, ok? It will all work out." And even though I didn't believe it, just hearing her say it somehow helped.

The rest of the day dragged right along with the rest of the week. I continued my self-exile only in an attempt to constantly remind my father of the good intentions I'd announced earlier in the week. He's made such a big deal about my happiness, about how important it was to him for me to be happy, that a few days having to observe me totally depressed served him right. And while Edward and Alice both called to check on me regularly, I just didn't have the energy to pretend things were ok. My eyes seemed to well up as soon as the phone rang, reminding me that'd always end up outside the circle.

During lunch on Friday, however, I must have dropped my guard enough to become momentarily distracted by an odd midday buzzing from my silenced phone. A text from Edward:

_Are you allowed out tonight? Why don't you come to practice and then we'll spend some time together? _

For the first time in the past two days it occurred to me that my dad's denied permission wasn't automatically a death sentence; I'd still have Edward even if I wasn't there for their little trip. I quickly wrote him back.

_If he hasn't invested in shackles I should be good for tonight. Some time with you sounds really good right about now. _

Alice sat down with her lunch in hand, obviously delighted by my lifted spirits. "Who hit you with the happy stick?"

I lifted my phone again to stop its buzzing. "Your brother." She smiled and didn't ask for an elaboration.

His reply message was short and sweet: _See you at six. Wear that smile I love so much. _

Just seeing his request in writing brought an unexpected smile to my lips. I thought about the killing Edward could probably make if he ever went into the greeting card industry – his saccharine way with words could be making women of the world swoon instead of just me.

I raced home after school let out to fix myself up a bit. Aside from my more-unkempt-than-usual look from the past few days, Edward's new infatuation with my school uniform made me suspect he'd now drop by unexpectedly on a regular basis. I wanted to start our respite off looking my best. This way, even when we were apart, he'd most definitely remember who he was coming back to.

I tended to dress for Edward, but this afternoon I dressed for me – wanting to look confident despite the sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. Rather than fixate on the reality of things, I focused on the weather. The warming temperatures made me think of Phoenix and how much I missed short sleeves and sandals. If 55° was a "warm spring day," then I'd be dressing for it. I hedged my bets against the humidity and put large hot rollers in to give my end-of-day hair a little volume. While getting dressed I paired my favorite hip-hugging jeans with a dark brown peasant top and wedges that rested only a couple of conservative inches from the ground. I liked that they made me taller, and like all height-enhancing shoes, made my butt look great. Last but not least a spray or two of perfume and I was ready to go.

I was sitting, waiting on the front steps when Edward pulled up. The anticipation of seeing him was compounded by the fact that my dad was pulling double shifts over the weekend. Even though he was the head honcho he was the first one to volunteer to cover a shift for one of his officers. It seemed crazy sometimes, but on the other hand it showcased his dedication – something I had always been proud of. It didn't really matter whether he was home or not, but I couldn't help remembering that the last weekend he'd had to work late was the night I fell asleep with Edward Cullen in my bed.

I'd planned to just hop into the passenger side of his car so we could get on the road, but of course he got out to meet me. Last time I saw him waiting by his car for me I'd bowled him over, unable to resist jumping into his arms. This time, still restrained by disappointment, I could contain myself enough to walk to him carefully on my tall shoes, working not to stumble on the driveway gravel. He held his arms out to the side slightly as I approached, allowing me to slide between them and press up against his chest. It felt good to have his arms tight around me and I felt his chin rest on the top of my head. "You smell good." I had a feeling he didn't immediately realize he said it out loud.

I pulled back a bit, unable to resist smiling. "Well, thanks." It was nice to have something else to talk about other than my exclusion from what could potentially be the best memory-making trip in any of our lifetimes. Even if the topic was what I smelled like.

He inhaled again. "I don't know what you call it," he inhaled a deep breath, "but I swear it's like heaven." I smiled and pushed my lips against his, pressing harder than was probably necessary, before climbing into the car. He shut the door behind me and got in on the driver's side, quickly backing out of the driveway. He still gave me a wicked case of the tingles whenever I saw him, but the comfortable place we'd entered lately made every interaction so much better. Being with him always felt like going home.

We showed up almost twenty minutes early, but it felt like we were late since everyone else was already there – sprawled across the limited furniture. The conversation went from college-town parties to shopping to hotels; however it all halted once we'd fully entered the space. I was pretty sure Alice had threatened everyone to keep quiet around me, but it wasn't fair to them. This should be a time of excitement, a time of planning, and a time to feel relaxed. After all, if nothing else we were done with school for one entire week.

Edward and I pulled up two floor pillows and climbed onto the shaggy rug surrounding the futon and makeshift table. He rested his back against the side of the futon and I rested my back against him. Their eyes seemed to rest on me for longer than was necessary, filling my chest with a tight, wound-up feeling. I don't know what possessed me to do it. I could blame anxiety, peer pressure, even the whole idea of getting caught up in the moment. But _something_ possessed me to open my big fat mouth and do the stupidest thing of my life thus far:

"Uh, make room for me – Looks like I'm going after all." The hint of dejection in my voice was noticeable even to me, making the statement lose some of its credibility, but no one else seemed to notice. I felt the standard surge of guilt associated with any lie I've ever told, but this one was short-lived. I decided then and there if Charlie was going to treat me like a rebellious teen, up to no good, then I'd act like one. _Serves him right_.

I didn't really mean it, but now that the verbal diarrhea was out there, I couldn't just take it back.

The look of excitement on Alice's face was enough to convince my subconscious to start believing the lie. And once I pretended to believe it myself it got easier.

Edward, his voice thick in my ear, spoke softly, "Why didn't you tell me?"

There was nothing I wanted to do less than lie to him, but I had painted myself into a corner. "I must have forgot." _No effing way he'll buy that…_

He gave me a slanted look seeming to indicate that the discussion on this topic wasn't over. Everyone else was already back to animatedly discussing the details and anticipating the fantastic in the way only a group of teenagers from a small town would. I actually relaxed enough to participate in the discussion, holding my conscience for ransom. It's amazing how much easier it was to live the lie than accept the truth. And if it all caught up to me later, I'd deal with it then.

Alice killed a bit of the fun when she pulled out a pad of paper and calculator, furiously pressing numbers and figuring out how much we'd each owe. While the band was getting paid a sad $300 and had agreed to put their earnings into the pot, we still owed money if we were going to do this trip with any semblance of civility. The guys had decided they'd have pretty much played for free if asked anyway so we decided an additional $50 a person would cover transportation and hotel. Everyone would be responsible for their own spending money. It was voted almost unanimously that food would be each person's own problem too – probably since Emmett could eat any one of us under the table.

Hearing plans begin to formulate really got me revved and by the time the pizza arrived, no one could concentrate on practicing. I think blowing off the rehearsal agitated Edward, whom I could feel running his fingers up through his hair compulsively behind me. Jasper shoved a slice at him, prompting him to relax, when Edward stipulated he would only relax about things if they stepped up practice for the next few days. It was easily agreed upon and we spent the hours, late into the night, discussing the trip. Every few minutes a little voice seemed to whisper, "What are you doing? You're not even going!" But seeing as how it was a little voice, it was easy to ignore…

Alice had asked Edward for a ride home since Emmett wasn't ready to leave. Alice immediately launched into a diatribe she called "Fun Facts About Spokane." Things were comfortable, as always, but I thought back to the discussion I'd had with Alice last weekend. They'd agreed to back off from one another when I was on their "neutral territory" and even set up a bunch of silly rules. It was kind of bizarre to think they'd put that much thought into my impact on their relationship, but I could understand it. They'd always been a pair and now that we were more like a threesome, it changed things.

We pulled into his normal parking spot, dimly lit off to the side of their garage which housed both of the parental vehicles. Alice planted a sideways kiss on the side of my face and gave a pinch to Edward's before hopping out of the car and strutting towards the house. Things had gone from very loud with her list of facts to very quiet in mere moments.

Turning off the ignition, he brought his hand to the side of my face, stroking it slightly with his thumb. "You look really beautiful tonight. I should have told you earlier." I wasn't sure if the dim light filtered through the trees hid or enhanced my bright blushing.

"Not doing too bad yourself." I don't know how I managed to speak with the most confidence while my insides were most in knots.

He laughed a quiet under-his's-breath type laugh. "You're ridiculous."

We weren't doing anything bad, or scandalous in the least, but being alone in his car at night, in the dark, made me feel like I was being bad. And I _liked_ it.

I must have liked it more than I even knew since I was leaning into his face before I realized I was even doing it. "Is that so?" I knew I was being forward, using that phone-sex voice I used when I wanted to win him over.

He moved his face to meet mine, struggling to catch his breath without even having a real reason to lose it. "Isabella, you are completely and utterly ridiculous." The words were barely out when I felt his mouth close in on mine, his soft hot lips stifling any chance I had of speaking. Not that I _could_ speak, or think…

I was almost most anxious to find out where he'd place his hands while kissing me. He seemed to like to rest them on my hips, a spot that seemed intended to holster his hands, but while sitting this wasn't possible. Instead he reached up to cradle my face between his hands. I could feel the heat of his mouth radiating into mine, and I was desperate for more. I felt the need to consume him, to be consumed, and wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him closer to me. I peeked through my barely-open eyes to see his closed, clenched eyes and swollen lips in the moments I temporarily pulled away. Closing my eyes again I pulled him to me tighter than before, feeling his hands slip to my sides, much higher than my hips, right beneath my heaving chest. His hands felt hot, boiling, right through my shirt. I could hear and feel every heavy breath as his lips worked down along my neck. The farther down his lips moved the tiniest little bit up his fingers moved. I wanted to reach down, to grab his hands and move them exactly where I wanted them, but I didn't get the chance.

I heard it before I was willing to accept it was real. Edward must not have heard it at all since he was confused when I quickly pulled away. There, walking past the car slowly, very slowly was a grinning Emmett, singing.

_Though it's cold and lonely in the deep dark night  
I can see paradise by the dashboard light_

His voice broke a little as he attempted to hit the high note on "lonely." His singing was loud and obnoxious, and if I hadn't known better I'd have thought he'd been drinking for sure.

He laughed as he peered in the window, only slightly steamed up, as he passed by – skipping a few lines to yell out:

_Cause we were barely seventeen  
And we were barely dressed_

Chuckling the rest of the way into the house, he forced a surge of anger through me. It wasn't really anger, more like the frustration you'd feel towards an annoying older sibling. I was sure Edward could relate. And to make matters worse, it wasn't even true! We were fully dressed despite the fact that everyone within earshot would now be thinking otherwise.

I did what any rational girl in my situation would do. I reached out and grabbed the key, bringing the engine back to life. "Let's go to my house."

He had backed out of the driveway and headed in the direction of my house before I could even think about slowing my racing heart.

* * *

EPOV

_Fuck you Emmett Cullen and the high horse you rode in on._ I didn't know why he felt it would help anyone's life in any way to not only interrupt our mostly private moment but exaggerate the fact that the paradise they referenced in the song was a little more…. _naked…_than what we were up to.

It was a total stunner that Bella reacted not only without embarrassment, but with the request that we relocate. I thought back to her text message, assuring me that I wouldn't have to wait forever but I was pretty damn sure she didn't mean tonight. Either way, I agreed heading for her place was by far the best alternative and anxiously peeled out of the driveway.

I noticed immediately that the Chief's police cruiser wasn't there – Bella Swan you sly dog. She was up and out of the car before I could remove the key from the ignition, switching up the roles by opening my door for me. Dragging me by one arm up to the door, my heart began to race – becoming so out of control I feared it was fighting its way out.

She pulled us both through the doorway in one fell swoop, and I started to question whether being here was a good idea. I could feel my self-control melting away by the second. She pushed me back against the front door, a feisty look in her eye that I wasn't used to. I suspected it was her anger, frustration, and lack of control over Charlie's decision behind her new, ahem…drive. I wanted nothing more than to run my hands all over this girl, but I didn't want her to push herself beyond where she was comfortable for the sake of catharsis. Plus, there were still a few things we needed to talk about. I put my hands on her face and kissed the top of her head before leading her over to the couch, her delicate hand firmly in mine.

I thought I'd start with the easier of the two topics I had on my mind. "Bella, I'm really sorry about Emmett. He's such an asshole sometimes. And the worst part is he doesn't even know it." I ran both hands nervously through my mop of hair.

"D_on't_ worry about it." Her voice fell into that deep sexy tone that seemed to travel right from my ears down to my crotch. _Great. How can I tell a girl I'll wait forever when it appears as though I can't wait 24 hours? _I pulled a throw pillow into my lap and tried to redirect my attention, but the way she lounged across the couch pulled her shirt tightly across her body, begging for me to notice. _Edward Cullen, shut your fucking eyes and count to a thousand if you have to. _

I did shut my eyes and take a few deep breaths. Changing the subject entirely would be my only saving grace, "When did your dad change his mind about the trip?" Every fiber in my being told me she was bluffing, things didn't add up. But I didn't want to be so quick to doubt her.

She bit her lip and looked away shyly. "Edward, please don't be mad." _I knew it._ "I was saying things before I even knew I was saying them. It was an accident." Sincerity radiated with every word. I honestly didn't know what to say. "He _will_ change his mind. You'll see. I've got it all figured out." I _highly _doubted that, but she could be particularly convincing. Especially when she touched her lips to the base of my neck, covering it in soft kisses.

Every moment was a struggle, fighting the urge to surrender completely. It was obvious she just wasn't dealing with the reality of things at this point. "Why are you pushing this so hard? I don't want you to get in trouble because of this, Bel."

She looked down, seeming more unsure of herself than I'd ever seen her. "I don't know how to answer that." _This was the Bella I was used to._ "I just really want to be there, to be a part of the group, and to spend some time alone with you. You know, away from all of this." She said the last part in this tone that implied I could never understand, while, on the contrary, I felt like I'd _invented_ those words.

"Bella, at night I dream of being alone with you." It was true, I just didn't feel the need to elaborate what we were doing about 95% of the time in those dreams. "I want you to come more than anything, but don't do it at the expense of everything else." I swallowed hard, once again feeling the pressure of her lips against my throat, "And just know that I'll never be upset with you if you always tell me the truth, ok?"

She vibrated a deep, "Mmmmnhmmm," against me, still kissing gently, her breath hot. _So much for my attempt at distraction; all it took was a few kisses and two syllables – not even a real word – for my body to once again regain control from my mind. _

She leaned over, resting her head on the pillow I'd left in my lap. _Shit._ I took a few deep, cleansing breaths until I felt some of the tension dissipate. I stroked her soft hair, watching her face and eyes become very relaxed.

I wondered how intentional each of her movements was, whether she planned to be driving me absolutely out of my mind. Her eyes remained closed as she spoke. "Will you do something for me?" I let my fingertips stroke her soft cheek, one finger tracing her lower lip.

"Anything. What can I do?"

Her heavy eyelids remained closed. "Come upstairs?"

I nodded until I realized she couldn't see that I was nodding. There were just no words ready to come out of my mouth. I must have been able to communicate everything I needed to using only my eyes, prompting her to slowly lift her body up into a seated position before grabbing my hand and leading me up to her bedroom.

I immediately sat on her neatly made bed, watching her keep her distance across the room. "What's wrong?" She pushed her CD player on for background noise, apparently a Dylan album of some kind, and leaned against the side of her desk. She was becoming more like me in that respect, unable to stand the silence.

She bit her lip again. "Nothing." She took a page right out of Alice's book on this one; it was the most loaded "nothing" I'd ever heard. Without meaning to I felt my eyebrow lift in disbelief. "Really, nothing's _wrong_. I just feel like I mislead you."

The small smirk playing across my lips was unavoidable. "Go on."

I watched Bella approach me slowly, sitting at the foot of the bed. "I knew if I asked you to, you'd come up here."

"Bel, I'm already here," I leaned back into her pillows, "so why don't you clear your conscience and tell me what you're not telling me."

"I just, I don't know, I didn't want to talk about this down there. That," she gestured toward the door implying the rest of the house, "still feels like it's his. This," she waved an arm around the room, "is mine." A deep breath calmed her, but for only a moment. "What if I _can't _fix things with my dad? What if it all backfires? What if while you're away you realize that I lift right out?"

I'd called her ridiculous twice already tonight, but she'd earned it most of all this time. I was afraid anything I said would venture too close to that cheesy _Jerry Maguire_ "you complete me" crap. Instead, I patted the spot next to me, needing her closer.

She climbed up the free side of the bed on her hands and knees like a cat, laying on one side to face me. "What if I realize that I can't be away from you? What if I realize everything worth doing is only worth it with you?" I stopped myself before the melodrama became unbearable.

"Edward," her eyes closed tightly and she inhaled deeply, "just hold me, please." Her cheeks were pink before she'd finished her statement. I wrapped her in my arms, pulling her head to my chest.

I was glad she couldn't see my face once the song changed, as a tight-lipped ironic kind of grin swept over me. I remember once telling Jasper that I'd pictured this as the kind of song people lost their virginity to. Although I'd said it long before the time any of us had even seriously thought about having sex, I'd meant it. And hearing it now only reinforced my preteen observation. The difference in hearing it now was that it wasn't all about the physical; it made me want to stay with her, to appreciate her, to do whatever I possibly could to make her happy. We listened, laying still, my arms holding her tightly, afraid of losing her if I ever let her go. I fucking loved this girl, completely and entirely.

_Lay, lady, lay, lay across my big brass bed  
Lay, lady, lay, lay across my big brass bed_

_  
Whatever colors you have in your mind  
I'll show them to you and you'll see them shine_

_Lay, lady, lay, lay across my big brass bed  
Stay, lady, stay, stay with your man awhile…_

I could tell she was still awake, even after almost an hour had passed. "What are you thinking about?" I expected her to say something sweet or morose even given her mindset lately. Instead, the laugh spilling out of her small body was startling. "What?" _This should be interesting…_

"There's no way I'm going to answer that question." I could tell she was blushing without being able to see her face.

_Ok, I _so_ have to know now…_ "Why Isabella Swan, didn't anyone ever tell you that it's not nice to keep secrets?"

I felt her chuckle against my chest. "This one's coming with me to the grave." _She definitely wanted me to know what she was thinking about; if she didn't she'd have just made up something lame and we'd both have moved on. _

Pulling her entirely onto me so I could see her face, I held her tight – completely at my mercy. "You sure about that?" She smiled, fighting in a playful manner to break free.

I slid my hands up under her arms prepared to tickle her into compliance when she dramatically caved. This too she'd gotten from Alice the Great. "Ok, ok. I surrender!" She hid her face in her hands, pressed into me, and in her muffled voice I was able to barely decipher the words "the towel."

_The towel? The towel! Two simple words and she'd managed to make _me_ turn red for a change…_

I couldn't control the effect she had on me. Just suspecting that somewhere in that adorable little head of hers was a dirty, filthy mind stirred the pressure within me once again. The weight of her body pressed entirely into my chest and abdomen, and I worried that she'd be offended if she was able to detect my arousal. _Nah, not with a filthy mind like that… _I kissed her face, fully enflamed with embarrassment, and decided to string the torture out a bit longer. "Oh, the towel. You liked that did you?"

Her eyes peeked from beneath her dark lashes. "Maybe."

I was overwhelmed with emotion, overwhelmed by the burning feeling deep in my stomach urging my lips to tell her everything I felt. Keeping my eyes firmly on hers, I let it out. "Bella, I have to confess… I know you feel guilty for asking me up here tonight, but the truth is I'd come up here if you asked me anytime. No matter what. No matter what you said, no matter what you did, if you asked me I'd come." I pushed my lips to her forehead. "And that's the problem."

She nuzzled up to my neck, and I swallowed hard. Her lips were light as they touched my skin. "No, _that's_ the problem. Don't worry so much, Edward." _Ah, familiar sounding words…_ Her hand rested on my chest, directly above my heart, "Stop torturing yourself over me. If I ask you up here, if I ask you to do something, you don't have to question it."

I nodded; it was all I could do. I wasn't used to letting myself off the hook for anything. She picked her head up to look me in the eye. I could feel my body straining up against her again, and – although it could have been a misconception on my part – she seemed to push back into me.

My resolve had weakened, and there she was, asking for it without having to ask for it. "Bella, you don't know what you're doing to me." _Although I was pretty sure she did…_I smiled at her mischievously. "Don't start anything you can't finish." It was a bluff – hell, we both knew it – but her quick glance at the clock indicated possible consideration…

"Shit, Edward! I'm so sorry!" She was suddenly frantic, darting to the window to look out at the front of the house. The sky was starting to lighten and I suddenly understood the panic; her dad would be home any minute and finding me here would _not_ be ideal.

Together we walked through the house, down to the front door where she followed me out onto the small porch. "I think I really messed things up. I'm sorry. I don't know how to even begin figuring a way out of this." My heart was torn to shreds as I noticed the tears lightly tracing down her face. The whole night had been less of an emotional rollercoaster and more like a ride on those crazy theme park teacups – a dizzying adventure leaving you somewhat nauseous but overall exhilarated.

"Isabella," it seemed to be the only way she knew when I was dead serious, "I love you too much to see you like this." I couldn't keep my fingers from wiping away each fat tear as it formed. "I might have an idea, just let me think about it ok?"

As we stood there on the front steps, she kissed me – hard – and nodded. I headed for my car at a brisk pace; we'd come so close I'd have hated to be caught at this stage of the game. I only turned back after hearing her voice: "Edward?" My eyes met hers easily.

"I love you too."

* * *

**Author's Note: Ok, I didn't want to bum you guys out with bad news earlier, but I'm leaving for a week's vacation early tomorrow morning. I won't have computer access so that means no Chapter 12 next week. Don't hate me too much, when it comes it will SO be worth it! **

**And since I'll be away, it would totally rock my world if you guys filled my inbox with a record number of those pretty little reviews of yours. I promise to reply to each and every one as soon as I get back. **

**3 L. **

**Other Songs:  
****Johnny Cash – Walk the Line** (Although I picture Edward singing it more like Chris Daughtry. Both versions are on my YouTube playlist – just search for "Tragic Turn.")  
**Bob Dylan – Lay, Lady, Lay**


	12. Another One Bites the Dust

****

Author's Note: Wow… just, wow! A few of you have sent me message about nominating Tragic Turn for a few of the upcoming Twilight fanfic awards and I'm just floored to know you love my story enough to spend the time nominating me. If I get any "official" nominations eligible for voting I'll be sure to let you guys know. And even if I don't get an official nomination I think you guys should all check out The Indies Twific Awards since they're aimed at up-and-coming authors – fab idea!

**This was a long chapter and I had to force myself to cut it off where I did or I'd never post on time. There's lots more to come and if you hang tight I think you'll enjoy it. **

**Best, **

**L.**

**Queen – Another One Bites the Dust**

* * *

Chapter 12 – Another One Bites the Dust

EPOV

I had planned on being her white knight, on saving the day, on making everything all right. But someone once said the road to hell was paved with good intentions and this time it certainly seemed true.

I went to see Chief Swan at work, planning to persuade, or, if necessary, beg him to let Bella go with us. Although she'd put herself in this current predicament, I wanted to shoulder the responsibility – to prevent her from encountering anguish of any kind.

"Edward, I can appreciate your motivation for coming here. And, believe it or not, I trust you kids." He took a deep breath and rubbed the side of his face with one hand. "But the little hissy fit she threw when I told her my decision cost her any kind of reconsideration. Sorry." He stood and picked up his hat, walking towards the back of the station.

The only thought I had after leaving the station was whether it would be better to tell her I tried and failed or not to tell her I tried at all. If she thought I didn't try she's be pissed at me, but if she knew her dad put his foot down once again she'd be beyond pissed with him. And seeing as how her big mouth cost her any shot at the trip, I figured it'd be better if she disliked me for a while.

When I called her I had already played out the conversation in my head. Hearing her voice made the lie much worse than I'd anticipated. "I really hate to be the bearer of bad news, Bel, but it looks like I was wrong. I'd been tossing around a few ideas to try and get the Chief to change his mind, but I realized they wouldn't work. I'm really sorry." It was the first time since we'd met that talking to her had been torturous.

I was hoping I wouldn't be able to sense her reaction so readily, but the tone in her voice oozed disappointment. "I – I understand. Don't worry about it. Thanks anyway." If it would have been possible to scoop her up into my arms, to cover her with kisses, to apologize to her face for things I hadn't even done I would have. But all I could offer her was solace in not having to face the others.

"Don't worry about telling Alice or the other guys; I'll make something up. I'm really gonna miss you."

"I'll miss you too – you have no idea."

Attempting to sleep that night was futile; my mind was too riddled with guilt for not going to see her in person to say goodbye. I'd decided to get up earlier than necessary to go see her in the morning – a thought that calmed me enough to sleep for a few hours. After all, tomorrow was going to be a very, very long day.

While I expected to be practically delusional from both a lack of sleep and getting up early, I didn't expect to see Bella sitting on the edge of my bed as my eyes blinked awake. To call the emotion surging through me 'surprise' was the understatement of the year. "What are you doing here?" _Write that one down Cullen in case history books want to document great lines of romance… _

"Um…" she looked at me like I should immediately understand, "I'm here to go with you." I couldn't help rubbing my eyes, trying to process this series of unexpected events. Before I could ask she answered my question, "Alice let me in."

Lying back against my suddenly inadequate pillows, I covered my face before speaking again. "I can't believe you're here. How'd you get him to change his mind?"

I watched her face intently, waiting for her reply. She ran a small hand through my hair, what I could only imagine as a nasty-case of bed head, her lips beginning to part formulating her response, when Emmett threw himself through my partially closed door.

"Dude, get your skinny white ass up – " his body froze entirely, obviously unaware Bella was there until he'd processed her presence. "Shit, sorry guys!" He half-heartedly shielded his eyes with one hand attempting to feel for the door. "I didn't mean to interrupt your little wakeup call." _Emmett you're such an asshole sometimes._ _An asshole parading around in front of my girlfriend in your way too tight boxer briefs. _

"Get the fuck out." I pointed toward the door to indicate that I was serious, but Bella's sudden fit of laughter seemed to counteract things.

Emmett, mostly ignoring my plea, turned to address her. "Ignore my brother's foul mouth first thing in the morning," this coming from the man whose first word ever was probably 'fuck.' He sauntered back out into the hallway just a little too slowly for my liking. I mean, muscles or not, no one had to see this much of Emmett so early in the day.

"Put on some fucking clothes next time you want to barge in on someone." He didn't answer. Instead his deep chuckle could be heard from down the hall.

_And I thought I was dreaming last time Bella Swan was in my room… _this_ was so surreal that even a dream didn't seem likely anymore. _Before I could open my mouth to find out how she'd changed her dad's firmly-set mind, she jumped up – kissing me on the forehead – "I'm gonna run out and pick up a few things since you're not quite all together yet." Her smile was contagious, despite the fact that I rarely smiled before 10 am. "And since you could definitely use a shower, it's probably better I'm not here for that." She gave this fucking sexy as hell sideways glance before slinking out into the hallway. I almost wanted to fall asleep again just so she'd wake me up when she got back, but it would only delay the inevitable. Instead I threw myself into the shower, for the first time allowing myself to bask in the change of events: Very shortly we'd be leaving for three days of supervision-free fun, and the sexy girl who just left my room would be coming along.

To my dismay, she still wasn't back when I strutted confidently back into my room – towel knotted at my waist. And she still hadn't returned when Emmett and I had dragged our stuff down into the driveway waiting for the Hales to show up. I was so preoccupied thinking about Bella that it wasn't until we were standing next to our luggage on the cool pavement that I realized one-third of our family was missing.

"Em, what'd you do with Alice?"

He had been pacing the spot where his car normally resided, currently in a shop a few towns over for repainting after Alice's revenge graffiti. Hearing her name must have brought back the anger he felt when he first saw how she'd defiled his paintjob since he practically spit his answer back at me. "I have no clue where _your_ sister is." _Apparently Alice wasn't the only one with a flair for the dramatics…_

Rolling my eyes was inevitable; in this family the absurd was more normal than not. I definitely didn't' hear Alice banging on the bathroom door while I showered – I'd been listening just in case Bella decided to fall through the doorway again – and her usual pre-trip pacing up and down the hallway holding her checklist was seemingly absent as well. My mind raced towards thoughts of middle of the night abductions and kidnappings from right within our very own home. The fear seemed to grip me too quickly, so I forced myself to consider that even if someone _did_ abduct her, they'd want to return her in about an hour. It wasn't a full laugh, but definitely a chuckle. And I only let myself do it because I knew, in my heart of hearts, that she was perfectly fine. Which only made her disappearance annoy me beyond belief.

If she hadn't been visible in the back of Jasper's car as he pulled the Explorer up in front of the house I'd have probably blown a gasket.

"Where's Bella?" She squinted at me for a minute before answering.

"I don't know. I left her here with you. I had an errand to run." She lightly paraded up the front walk, dragging Emmett in behind her to carry her oversized suitcase down the stairs. "How'd you manage to lose her already? We haven't even left town!" _Great! _We hadn't even left yet and so far both of my siblings had gotten on my bad side. The thought of us all stuffed in the Explorer together, equipment draped across our laps, suddenly sounded like a really, _really_ bad idea.

"You know," I met Jasper's eyes purposefully, "I think I'm gonna take my car too. One car just doesn't seem…" I'd have to use just the right word to sound convincing, "…practical."

"Totally agree, Cullen. Good thinking." No questions, no snide comment. Apparently I wasn't used to dealing with civilized, normal people.

Hoisting my duffel bag into the Volvo's trunk along with Opal's case and a second case with my favorite acoustic guitar, I left it open waiting for the suitcase that should be sliding alongside my stuff any second.

Alice came loudly back through the front door, quite the feat considering her small stature and that Emmett was the one struggling with the suitcase she could probably live in. He practically stumbled over himself until both he and the luggage were outside before grunting, lifting it over his head, and practically throwing it into the back of the Explorer. I was fairly certain seeing the dissembled drum kit was probably the only thing that prevented him from throwing the bag with his full potential.

The only thing missing at this point was – no need to think it, the rumbling of her ancient truck could be heard from a few blocks away. I didn't realize everyone was aware of the sound until I heard Jasper's voice: "_That_ would be the misses." He smirked while speaking, eyes drifting back and forth between Alice and myself.

Her smile was obvious from down the block, a flash of white standing out through the windshield. I hadn't been aware of my own smile until was able to feel the others' eyes on me, waiting for me to say or do something. I watched her park just past the house, in front of a large hedge dividing us from the neighbors. Walking to her quickly, I wanted to lift her stuff so she wouldn't struggle and do the one thing I'd been thinking about since I saw her in my room this morning.

She started to say something, but I didn't hear it. I was too busy kissing her. I kissed her for every bit of guilt I'd felt yesterday, for not being able to fix things for her, and for every second I thought I'd have to be away from her this week. And after finally pulling from her, after recognizing the context and the fact that everyone was waiting on us, only one word seemed right: "Hey."

Biting her lip before responding, she glanced at the group before meeting my eyes again. "Hey."

Pulling her by the hand, I led her back to the others, quickly whispering, "I wish we had time to stop at Millie's this morning."

Her smile was so pretty it was heartbreaking, "Totally." I felt her give my hand a little squeeze before we were within talking distance.

Emmett, doing some little boxing moves as he jumped back and forth in place seemed to distract us both until Jasper spoke, regrouping us. "Ok, so here's the plan. Since all the crap's in my car, anything that doesn't fit can go in Edward's trunk. I'm guessing he and Bella will be rockin the Volvo this morning, no pun intended, and the rest of us will cram into the Explorer with a little extra breathing room thanks to this cat right here," pointing in my direction to my utter embarrassment, "so let's get on the road. The quicker we leave, the quicker we land. And Emmett, you're taking the first driving shift since you're way, way too peppy in the morning. Ok?"

We all knew it was a question that didn't need an answer. It hadn't slipped past me that Rosalie hadn't left the front passenger seat since they pulled up. My guess was that she was afraid of losing the seat if she left it, and with Rosalie it was always her way or the highway.

Bella and I stood leaning against the car, watching them pile in and Alice give an enthusiastic wave as they pulled away. I'd wanted to talk to her, to continue getting to the bottom of what she said to Charlie, but Emmett seemed to interrupt as usual. He stopped a hundred yards down the road, backing up a little bit and lowering the driver's side window. "Hey, let's go. We're doing this convoy style and one does not a convoy make."

Even I couldn't help laughing at the colorful way he seemed to put things. And we'd have the next seven hours together for my little interrogation. I held her door open while she got situated before going around to the trunk, sliding in her beat-up duffel and slamming it hard. We took off behind the dark green behemoth SUV that only seemed bigger with Emmett behind the wheel. Although my windows were only open a crack, I could swear he was making trucker noises up ahead, a wisp of "Breaker, breaker one-nine…" drifting in. At that moment I was happier than ever to be alone with Bella, not having to share her for the next several hours.

I tried to be patient, bargaining with myself that once we hit the highway it would be safe to ask about what happened with the Chief. "So you gonna keep me guessing or what?" I had a feeling she knew exactly what I was getting at.

She had been silently looking out the passenger side window since we left. Obviously she had something on her mind and I was pretty sure my question would drag the information out of her. Her eyes seemed to indicate she was considering multiple options before answering, but her body language – suddenly relaxed shoulders and a deep, long exhalation – expressed that she'd mostly likely decided to go with the truth. "I didn't exactly change my dad's mind."

"Well what exactly did happen?" I was careful not to go all parental on her, keeping my voice even toned, only allowing the concern to show through.

She again looked out the window, reading a passing billboard message aloud under her breath. "I left a note." It wasn't a question, but she said it like a question, wanting my approval.

The wind had suddenly been knocked from me, aware that Bella Swan was, in her own way, a girl on the run. And when Chief Swan sent the entire SWAT team out to find her, I'd be the asshole driving the car. Honestly, I didn't care about me, whatever the consequences, but I hurt for her. It's hard to see someone you love make such a monumental mistake while remaining supportive. "Bella," I hoped she could hear the tenderness I felt for her, "I really don't know if this is such a good idea."

"Edward," she turned her body towards me, placing her hand on top of my arm, "I think I pretty much accepted this as a bad idea since I showed up at your house this morning." She paused longer than she normally would. "But I realized that even if you took me back, we'd never beat him home. He'd still see the note. I'd still get lambasted. He'd probably blame you even though it wasn't your fault in the slightest, and we'd have nothing to show for all of it." Her small, soft fingertips traced down my right bicep, along my forearm, and then back along the same path in reverse. "At least this way we get a few days together."

I hated that she had me cornered. Truthfully, her rationalization made sense in a twisted, never-gonna-see-the-light-of-day-again kind of way. If she was going to have her head handed to her over this, she might as well deserve it. Although I instantly felt guilty for even thinking it – she was doing this for me, to be with me, and letting her go down alone wasn't an option.

"Bella, I thought you were going to tell me the truth about these kinds of things. You just end up torturing yourself and then eventually you tell me anyway."

"I know. But technically I didn't lie or anything; I just _omitted_." She was sounding more like Alice by the day.

I took her hand in mine, holding it up to kiss it before letting our entangled fingers rest between us. "Your little omission could have led to an APB or something for all we know."

She used her thumb to stroke the side of my hand. "He'll be mad while I'm gone, and there'll be hell to pay when I get back, but he seems to trust you Mr. Cullen – and for that very reason he knows I'll come back in one piece." She had moved her lips up to my ear while talking, softening her voice with each word. I wasn't sure if I'd entirely processed what she was saying, but I was finding myself convinced. When her soft lips made contact with the spot just below my ear I decided to default to her on this one; if she wasn't worried I'd try not to be. Try being the optimal word.

Her mouth still pressed against the side of my face, she spoke between deep breaths, "Now please don't worry. Just enjoy our time together, ok?" I couldn't promise not to worry, but enjoying our time would be something she'd never have to ask me for. I turned my head enough to meet her mouth with mine before returning my eyes to the road.

While the last thing I wanted was for her lips to leave any part of me they wanted to touch, it was a relief when she changed subjects. "Did you notice anything strange about Alice?"

_The setup was just too perfect…_But rather than take the opportunity, I took her question seriously. "What do you mean?"

She sat back completely in the passenger seat, tucking her legs comfortably up beneath her. "I don't know. She just seemed to be keeping her distance this morning."

"Bel, she was probably just all wrapped up in seeing Jasper – you know how she gets." It was true, Alice definitely threw herself into her newest project 100%.

"Yeah, you're probably right." She closed her eyes, resting her head against the side panel. I couldn't help stealing glances of her, resting so peacefully. I might have even gotten _too_ distracted if my phone hadn't started buzzing from within my pocket someplace. _Alice_. Her ears must have been burning or something…

She'd sent a text – _He's doing it again! We're pulling over – I'm faking a bladder emergency!_

I called her back – much easier than trying to text behind the wheel – "Hey, say no more. We're right behind you."

* * *

BPOV

"What was that about?"

"Alice, she just wanted to warn me that they're pulling into a rest stop." It had barely been an hour and a half, but knowing Alice she probably let herself get so excited she practically wet herself.

Something about Edward's expression kept me fixated on him. Although I couldn't be sure, a smile seemed to be playing across his lips.

The green truck ahead of us signaled onto the ramp taking us to the next stop. Edward followed with the Volvo, pulling into a spot beside the others. Alice darted out quickly, running into the building presumably to use the bathroom. Jasper and Rosalie both stretched out their arms and backs looking more tired than when we'd begun and Emmett leaned against the back panel, grinning from ear to ear. "You know, I never really thought about it before, but road trips are pretty fucking sweet. We should do this more often."

It became awkward when no one immediately responded until Rosalie spoke up. "Why don't we stay focused on this one before you go crazy planning another, ok?" She ran her fingers up and down his chest as she spoke, stroking his ego in all the right places. I wondered if I looked so obvious, and so downright cheap, when I played the same tricks. Although I guess I couldn't blame the girl; all women have a common bag of tricks and bashing one another would be counterproductive.

Alice, strolling back from the dingy-at-best restaurant came to stand next to Edward, leaning against the side of his car. A hushed exchange between them and a nod from Edward brought a large, toothy smile to her face.

She pulled Jasper aside, whispering into his ear, and I took the opportunity to quiz Edward. "What's going on?"

His laugh was quiet, yet intoxicating. "You'll find out. Alice is riding with us for a while."

Jasper leaned in to kiss her forehead, his hand rubbing the back of her neck before embracing her tightly with one arm. "All right kiddies, back on the road again."

Emmett, lifting one hand to his mouth imitating a truck radio system, made a sound effect like static. "Uh, yeah, that's a big 10-4 Pig-Pen. Yeah, we definitely got us the front door good buddy,  
Mercy sakes alive, looks like we got us a convoy." I recognized his words from something, they definitely weren't his, but I couldn't place them.

I didn't have too much time to worry about it though, since everyone was climbing back into their respective seats – the Explorer now minus one. Glancing over my shoulder, Alice could be seen sprawled across the backseat like the reclining women in Renaissance paintings. She looked spent considering it was still pretty early.

The sound of Edward's voice broke my concentration. "So how bad was it, Al?"

If she hadn't already been fully reclined it would have been just the moment to dramatically toss herself into the seat. "Worse than I remember it. I'd have thought he'd grow out of it or something. Mom and Dad always said it was just a phase."

Edward laughed heartily, obviously trying to imagine the occurrence both were dancing around at this point. He must have noticed my perplexity, laughing once again. "Let's just say that Emmett gets very passionate during long car rides." _Whatever that meant… _

I figured that having Alice in the car would make things more fun and lively, but instead I watched her eyes droop shut as she curled up against the black leather seat. I had zero proof, and even less to use as circumstantial evidence, but something was definitely up with her. Edward's hand gripping either side of my knee brought me back. "Why don't you get some rest too? It's going to be a long day as it is." My body temperature seemed to rise a few degrees just feeling the heat of his palm through my jeans.

"Maybe you're right." I mean I was on the verge of mental breakdown as it was, having to deal with everything from my father's eventual fury to Alice. He reached for his coat in the backseat in one swift motion, and handed it to me. Using one sleeve as a bunched-up pillow and the rest as a blanket I curled against the window – his scent completely embracing me.

I wasn't sure exactly why, but the last thought I remembered before drifting off was the towel…

I couldn't say how long I'd actually slept, really drifting in and out more than a solid block of sleep, but I was fully awakened by the sound of Alice's hysterical laughter in the backseat.

"What's going on back there?"

Even though I'd been the one to ask, she directed her answer to her brother. "Uh, ok, so it's been what, like an hour since we last stopped?"

"Almost two. Time sure flies when you can snooze in the backseat."

She stuck her tongue out at him behind his back in a very sisterly way. "Well, it appears as though there'll be another pit stop coming up."

"Who is it this time?" The smile on Edward's face was broad and all-knowing.

"Who else?" Apparently Edward didn't need further explanation, but the cryptic talk was starting to really get old…

It's funny, but despite being in a confined space with the two people I was most comfortable with, I was afraid to say anything. Something in the air was just… strange. I decided to talk to Edward when we stopped – out of the earshot of the others.

In a quick fifteen minutes we were following Emmett into a McDonald's parking lot to stretch our legs. Emmett went inside to "replenish" himself and Rosalie tagged along, signaling a confusing gun-to-the-side-of-the-head with her finger. The others stifled laughter behind Emmett's back, watching him throw an arm across Rosalie's shoulder as they reached the door. Edward mirrored his brother, putting an arm over my shoulder. "Let's all get a bite to eat so we've got strength for the second half of this drive."

Walking back towards the cars after lunch, Jasper slapped Emmett on the back and gave him what appeared to be a wink before climbing into the backseat of the Volvo directly behind me. Emmett was blatant in returning the wink, even giving Jasper one of those finger gunshots back.

Edward, turned over his shoulder to look first at Alice and then at Jasper, cracking himself up. "I guess another one bites the dust, huh?"

Jasper's smile was charming. Since he appeared to be in good spirits, I'd ask him to fill in all the blanks the other two kept creating. "Jasper, what the hell is going on in that car?" My frustration obvious.

He pulled his head forward between Edward and me. "You mean the sneaky Cullen siblings didn't let you in on the big secret either?" Go figure Jasper would be my comrade… I shook my head, anxious for him to continue. _Finally someone was speaking my language! _"Well, apparently Emmett is like annoying as hell in the car and these two wise guys," he gestured between them, "knew all about it. I mean, they just threw Rose and me under the bus! Although, she _does_ sleep with him so she should be able to tolerate a little bit of singing and license plate games."

Ok, it was starting to all make sense. "Singing? Emmett was singing?"

"Oh, yeah. Apparently being in the car brings out this whole auditory side of him no one knew existed." He looked like Edward for a minute, running his hands through his messy blonde hair. "Well almost no one." He seemed to focus his glare on Alice, who giggled while trying to hide her face.

"I didn't know if you'd find it as irritating as I do – some people enjoy those kinds of car activities."

Jasper grabbed her by the shoulders in a play-attempt at shaking her. "Alice Cullen, you are pure evil sometimes." She slid into the crook of his arm despite her torso being firmly buckled in.

Since Jasper was the only one answering my questions, I only directed them to him. "Jasper, tell me more about this singing? I mean why was it so horrible?"

He settled into his own version of "storytelling mode," however in contrast to Alice's Jasper was highly relaxed. "Yeah, so we leave the Cullens' and Emmett starts this trucker voice talking into an imaginary radio. He goes on and on with 'Breaker this' and 'Breaker that' until I realize he's doing the whole fucking intro to that convoy song. The _whole_ thing!" I was immediately able to place the familiar words he'd been saying earlier as part of that ridiculously annoying, yet catchy song. "So I say to myself, you know, like 'how long can he possibly keep this up?' Little did I know, this kid has fucking energy spilling out his ears."

Watching Jasper tell a story was almost as entertaining as watching Alice. His entire body seemed to reflect disinterest while his voice rose and lowered to emphasize the right parts. "And then he moves into the chorus, but I swear that's like as much as he knows since he just kept singing it over and over again whenever we'd see a semi on the road. So it gets real quiet, and I think that the worst is over. Well shit, that's when he starts up with the Herman's Hermits songs."

Edward jumped in, breaking the trance: "Yeah, about that… see, Alice and I were wild for The Kinks as kids, but for Emmett it was Herman's Hermits. I swear, he even sung with a British accent sometimes to sound more like Peter Noone. And yeah, everyone thought it was so cute and they'd encourage him to do it whenever we traveled by car. But I'd have bet money he'd have grown out of that by now…" Rather than stopping speaking, his voice just seemed to trail off.

"Yeah, well I should have taken that bet my friend. So he does a few lines of "I'm into Something Good" and it's starting to piss me off, I mean all I want is some peace and quiet at this point, but it's… tolerable. And then he moves into "Henry VIII" and before he finishes the first line Alice screams she needs us to stop to use the bathroom. Now _that_ should have been my first clue to get the hell out of there…" He rubs the top of Alice's neatly groomed head, slightly messing up her hair. "But instead my girlfriend abandons me in the car with Fruit Loops and the Ice Queen, and you know what? He picked up _right_ where he left off the second we got back into the car."

I thought back to the song; I knew it but hadn't heard it in years. It's not the kind of thing you'd hear on the radio every day.

_I'm Henry the eighth I am  
Henry the eighth I am, I am  
I got married to the widow next door  
She's been married seven times before  
And every one was an Henry (Henry)  
She wouldn't have a Willy or a Sam (no Sam)  
I'm her eighth old man, I'm Henry  
Henry the eighth I am_

Second verse same as the first

Yeah, I could see how that could get pretty annoying….

"So what happened?" I was on the edge of my seat; this was not at all what I was expecting – not that I knew what to expect at all really.

"So," he sat up, starting to feed into my interest, "then Emmett starts up with some bullshit about some song that may or may not be real.. I don't know what the fuck he was talking about." He laughed to himself, stopping at just the point where we'd all be egging him on, even Edward.

"Sounds like a fucking riot." Edward's genuine interest hyped up my own and I turned back to Jasper like a child waiting for the end of a bedtime story.

"So this song, right? Something about a banana…"

"No. Freaking Way." Alice's eyes grew wide. "Why the hell would he bring _that _up?" She covered her mouth, stifling her giggles, before turning to face Jasper. "Was he by any chance talking about "My Wife Left Town with a Banana"?"

Jasper's mouth stayed open a moment, surprised by her instant recognition. "Uh, yeah. And I'm gonna pretend I'm not interested in why you know that. So Emmett's going on and on about how it's 'about a banana but maybe not really about a banana' when my sister decides to open her trap, insisting it isn't even a real song. Like she'd know! Stillettos and tight pants she might know something about, but music not so much."

Alice's voice practically cut him off, "For the record, it is _so_ a real song."

Jasper clamped his hand over her mouth. "Stop interrupting, you little terror! So anyway they're going back and forth and I hear the word banana being said more times than in a Harry Belafonte song, so I figure I have to get the hell out of there or I'd leap out onto the highway just to end my suffering."

By now he's really coming to life, and talking with his hands. I only allowed my eyes to shift away from him when Edward started digging in his pocket for his buzzing phone. I let him answer and start talking while prodding Jasper to continue. "And my mind is racing trying to formulate a plan when it hits me. I mean, it's not like those two are the brightest crayons in the box or anything… so I punch Emmett on the shoulder and just like mutter under my breath, 'got it buddy, don't worry.' And then demand he pull over at the next fast food place."

Normally the sound of Edward's voice was beautiful, endearing, sexy even – but right now it was the sound pulling on about 30% of my attention while I was trying to get the good part of Jasper's story. "So we get out, right before you guys pull in and he's quizzing me on the sudden need to stop. So I pull this story I'd been concocting out of my ass and go, 'Dude, you gave me the code.' And Emmett's all confused, you know, asking me what I meant. So I'm like, "C'mon man, think about it… _banana… leaving town…_Dude! It's totally code for needing some time alone with Rose.'"

Now cracking himself up before elaborating, Jasper took a deep breath before wrapping things up. "So he thinks about it, looks over at her, and goes, 'You know, maybe you're right. Maybe it was some kind of subconscious thing or some shit like that.' And that was it. I was off the hook and happily made my way into this lovely automobile with my very favorite people." He kissed the top of Alice's head sweetly, pulling her closer to him. "The lack of Henry the eighth in here is mighty fine, too."

I realized I'd been smiling the whole time he spoke and for the first time I fully appreciated Jasper as more than Edward's friend or Alice's boyfriend, or even Rosalie's brother. He was fun, he was real, and he could tell a story like it was his job.

Edward quickly put his phone back into his pocket and spoke loudly, addressing us all: "Ok, you might not believe it, but someone in the Explorer is requesting we make another stop." He turned his head, trying to briefly look at each of us. "I'll give you two guesses, but you'll only need one."

Jasper rubbed the bridge of his nose, a smile straining through his tight lips. "Fuck, what was it you said before, E?"

He caught Jasper's eye in the rearview mirror. "Oh you know what I said."

They were playing some kind of game with understood rules that apparently existed in a pitch too high for female ears, like dog whistles. Jasper laughed and pulled Alice to him momentarily before patting me on the shoulder. "Damn right, I do – right Bella? Like the great Freddie Mercury once said, may he rest in peace… another one bites the dust."

Quickly thumbing through his connected ipod Edward started the song, Jasper unable to resist singing along to the entire thing. I'm pretty sure if he'd been able to stand he'd have been dancing too.

_Steve walks warily down the street,  
With the brim pulled way down low  
Ain't no sound but the sound of his feet,  
Machine guns ready to go  
Are you ready, Are you ready for this  
Are you hanging on the edge of your seat  
Out of the doorway the bullets rip  
To the sound of the beat_

Another one bites the dust  
Another one bites the dust  
And another one gone, and another one gone  
Another one bites the dust  
Hey, I'm gonna get you too  
Another one bites the dust

_How do you think I'm going to get along,  
Without you, when you're gone  
You took me for everything that I had,  
And kicked me out on my own_

Are you happy, are you satisfied  
How long can you stand the heat  
Out of the doorway the bullets rip  
To the sound of the beat

Edward followed Emmett into a gas station a few minutes off the highway. We were just under two hours from the hotel in Spokane where Alice had booked two rooms. Honestly, we probably could have all crammed in one to save money, but the second bathroom would definitely come in handy – just between Alice and Rosalie alone.

It hadn't been very long since they last filled up both vehicles, but both drivers pulled into pumps to refill anyway. Rosalie jumped out of the truck and quickly walked towards the small restaurant adjacent to the station.

"You know," I turned to be sure Edward was listening, "I'm gonna run inside too. As long as we're stopped." It felt good to stretch my legs, to breathe the fresh air, and to be free – even if the freedom was only temporary. _Very _temporary.

I could see Rosalie's high wedged shoes in the first stall of the tiny ladies room and silently entered the one beside it. I'd always hated to use the bathroom while someone I knew was in there – call it a personal hang-up. On this occasion I forced myself to get over my performance anxiety and get it over with, coming out of the stall as Rosalie headed to the sink to wash her hands.

We smiled politely at one another, but in all our time as "friends" we'd never really been alone or had a one-on-one conversation. Maybe that was why the sound of her voice in the near-silent washroom was startling.

"I tried everything I can think of: deep breathing, meditation, even turning up a bit of my womanly charm, but I swear if I don't get out of that car I'm going to fucking scream."

What could I possibly say to that? "He's your boyfriend. Was it really _that_ bad?"

"Well," she pretended to fix her already-perfect makeup, "think about it this way. If a set of nails are slowly, very slowly, scratching their way down a chalkboard in the middle of a quiet room – the sound ricocheting off every wall only amplifying the horrible make-your-ears-bleed sound – would you care if the person doing it was smokin' hot and could do things with his…"

I knew right where she was headed and didn't need the mental picture. "Yeah, uh, I think I catch your drift." I hoped it was enough to prevent her from finishing the undoubtedly graphic thought.

"You know, I was caught off guard to find out about you and Edward." She seemed to be investigating her face for blemishes – nonexistent blemishes of course – despite the horrid fluorescent lighting.

_What the hell is that supposed to mean?_ "Really?" Ok, so I edited myself a bit…

"Well, considering he followed me around like a puppy for years – practically our whole childhood – _you_ were a," she took a long, deliberate pause before finishing her thought, "surprise." I guess Rosalie figured Edward would either end up with a tall, statuesque blonde beauty like her or die alone after a sad existence of pining for her.

She smiled at me as if her comment was somehow a compliment, and the fact that it _appeared_ to be genuine was what was so scary. I couldn't think of one thing to say that wouldn't involve storming out and demanding that Edward drive me as far away from Rosalie as humanly possible. So instead, I said nothing and tried to return her sick version of a genuine smile. I was certain mine was much more transparent.

"And, as your friend, I just want to warn you to be careful about him." She turned to face me now, no longer exchanging glances through our washed-out reflections. "I heard he had a girl in his room one night, not too long ago in fact. I heard him discussing it with Alice the next morning." She finished running her fingers through her platinum locks. "In fact," she said it as if the thought had just dawned on her. _Yeah, right._ "I think it was the night we had the sleepover and you left. It's probably a good thing you didn't stick around."

She headed for the door and turned around to face me again before slipping out, "I just thought you should know."

I'd been able to take her passive-aggressive behaviors in the past and even justified her insensitivity as part of her "charm," but this time she'd crossed the line and I realized she was just plain _mean_. Instead of saying everything I wanted to, I said nothing. Instead of gauging her eyes out, I smiled. And instead of lingering on her cruel-hearted words, I attempted to take solace in the fact that despite everything she'd said _he picked me_.

Under normal circumstances I'd have been curious what Rosalie said to Emmett to switch cars without arousing suspicion, but I didn't care. In fact, it was awfully tempting to just out her to him, but I quickly realized Alice and Jasper would end up on his shit list too. I climbed quickly into the passenger side before Rosalie could make up a reason why the spot should be hers and watched the three of them squeeze into the small backseat. Emmett gave a wave from the window of the Explorer up ahead and pulled back out onto the highway.

It was obvious from Edward's compulsive glancing in my direction that he knew something was wrong. But knowing him he wouldn't put me on the spot in front of an audience. He reached for my hand and I accepted it, unable to keep my mind from drifting back to everything Rosalie had said.

Without turning around to look I could tell Rosalie had her body weight pressed against Alice who'd been elected to sit in the middle because of size. It was true, she was smallest, but I was quickly learning that Rosalie Hale always got her way regardless of logic. Just her presence, her very existence was annoying me. In my peripheral vision I saw her reach up to smooth one of Edward's unruly locks from behind and that was it.

"Stop the car! Stop the car!" Edward's eyes bulged with concern. "Right _now_!"

We were still in the far right lane, having barely just got onto the highway again, and Edward immediately swerved onto the shoulder, stopping the car. I stepped out before he'd been able to put the car in park and began to take deep breaths, watching Emmett pull the Explorer over up ahead. He backed up until he was less than a football field ahead of us and got out of the car, both hands up in the air questioning the sudden change of events.

Seeing him indicated my one escape from the amalgam of emotions Rosalie stirred up only minutes earlier. I took steps towards the Explorer, maybe only four or five, before Edward caught me by the shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes. "Bella, where are you going? What's going on?"

"I'm riding with him." One extended finger pointed in Emmett's direction. "It's getting a bit…" I couldn't help my exaggerated glare towards Rosalie, "crowded."

Edward followed my gaze, looking to Rosalie for some kind of explanation. Her silence seemed to indicate her complete awareness of everything she'd said and done to drive me to this point. His voice was soft and quiet: "Please don't go. Tell me what happened."

"Rosalie happened. Go ask her." I felt tears building and wanted to walk away before he'd have a chance to see them.

Behind me he yelled into the open car door, occasionally drowned out by the loud sound of passing traffic.

Everything was hitting me at once. Rosalie had single-handedly made me doubt everything with Edward. I'd run out on my dad who was probably beyond furious and writing a list of punishments resembling something out of Dante's _Inferno_. And I'd somehow reminded myself of Alice's continued distance since I saw her this morning. Restraint was never my strong-suit, but this time I didn't even try. "And while you're at it, maybe you could ask Alice why she's acting like I've got the plague or something!"

I hurried the rest of the way to the truck and got in before I could register anything anyone was saying behind me. Emmett's kind smile was beyond refreshing. "What the hell is going on back there?"

Drained didn't fully describe how I felt, but I didn't want to take it out on him. "Don't worry about them – just a heated game of I Spy." It was so much easier than the truth. "You don't by any chance like car games do you?" I knew my interest would thrill him and with any luck keep my mind busy. _I spy, with my little eye, a big fat liar._

"Bella, I knew you and I were kindred spirits!" He spoke again after a short moment of silence. "It was probably Rose, right? Who sent things over the edge? I mean she's great and all, you know – lots of good qualities," _although right now_ I'd _be hard pressed to think of one…_ "but don't think I'm oblivious to it all. I know how she is." Maybe he was right, maybe we _were_ kindred spirits.

For sympathizing with me without even knowing it I threw him a bone. "What about singing? I can just tell you like to sing in the car."

He seemed to blush a little before immediately launching into "Henry VIII" asserting the full density of his voice, bouncing with enthusiasm. By the time he got to "Second verse, same as the first" I'd joined in.

* * *

EPOV

"What the fuck, Rosalie?" To say I was fuming was mostly an understatement. It might have been more accurate to say 'borderline homicidal.' "What could you possibly have done to send Bella running for the hills? Explain. _Now_."

Her nonchalance was a bad sign. "I didn't say anything that wasn't true. Who knew she was so goddamn touchy!"

"Rosalie I swear I'll drag you out of the backseat by your hair if you don't tell me what happened. And trust me, no one, not even your brother will dare stop me."

Jasper wore his outrage on his sleeve, hardly able to contain himself. "Rose can't you just bottle whatever makes you such a bitch and keep it hidden for one day? Shit, she's a fucking nice girl who is dating our friend and you go and start trouble. Christ!" If Alice hadn't been incredulously sitting between them I think I might have done the yanking-by-the-hair himself. And I for one would have applauded it.

"Jasper, shut the hell up! Like you're so perfect!" She leaned forward to face me, still hunching in through the passenger side door. "I just educated your little Mary Sue on a few things, ok? And it was all fact. Pure and Simple." By this point she wasn't even attempting to hide her audacity.

I lunged forward, not really intending to touch her – more scare her into just confessing already. "Fuck. Okay, okay. So I told her about the girl you had in your room. You know, the night I slept over. And I _might_ have suggested she be careful with regards to you. I mean really, who knows what your _true_ intentions are." She couldn't handle the heat now – although she never could. Her M.O. was to deflect immediately onto others. "Blame Alice, she's the one I heard it from. You were there in fact – right in your goddamn kitchen." She leaned back closing her eyes attempting to exude purity and innocence. "Edward, don't hold me accountable for _your_ poor choices."

I understood the expression "seeing red" for the first time in my life. And the color red I saw was tinted with the lipstick I so desperately wanted to smack off her face along with her shit-eating grin. Of course, it was pure fantasy, violence wasn't really my style, but just fantasizing about it was cathartic. I was prepared to throw her out of the car, to exile her back to Emmett, and to drag Bella back with desperate begging and pleading, but instead I watched Emmett slowly pull the truck from the side of the road into traffic.

I slid behind the wheel and loudly laid down the law: "Since I'm fair enough not to abandon you right here in God knows where, you're going to sit there and not say one fucking word until we get there. And if I hear so much as you _breathing_ too loud I'm pulling over and you're walking. Got it?"

She said nothing, which I took as an understanding on her end, and we drove on – all of us silent.

Alice had tried calling Bella right away, before I could even begin to dial, but it went straight to voicemail. After that we were both resigned to the fact that she needed some space.

It was overwhelming. The nearly seven hours in the car, compounded by Bella's assured life-sentence upon arrival back home, multiplied by the heartbreak one thoughtless person dared to inflict on her. Over something non-existent. Overwhelming suddenly didn't seem adequate enough.

It was still pretty early in the day, mid-afternoon once all our stops were accounted for, but my eyes were heavy with exhaustion – both physically and mentally. The only thing that seemed to make the time pass while keeping my mind alert was Bella. This trip was supposed to be fun, a chance to be alone, an opportunity to be a little free. I'd pictured that smile in a million scenarios, about half of which I'd deny if ever asked, but just knowing I'd have three days to spend with that smile – and I'd do whatever I had to to bring it to her face – made it all worthwhile. The band stuff was just a bonus.

I felt guilty even admitting that to myself, but for the first time something trumped everything else that was ever important to me. It was almost scary knowing that meeting this girl shifted every one of my priorities. Suddenly, she was at the top of my list.

That smell, the one that elicited a stirring deep within me, wafted from where she'd been sitting. It was such a tease. I fought the urge to look, knowing all I'd find would be a sleeping Jasper, loudly breathing from his mouth. I'd been hoping Rosalie'd do the same so I'd have a reason to watch her face in the rearview mirror as we left her in our dust. Instead she slept, or pretended to sleep, in the backseat behind me – I didn't trust her as far as I could throw her at this point.

Maybe the worst part was that I knew why she did it and I should have known better. Ok, realistically it would have been impossible for me to predict she'd pull something like this, but she'd always had attention issues. And I had a feeling Bella having my complete and utter attention seemed to Rosalie like something had been robbed from her. It didn't matter that she had a boyfriend, that she got catcalled on the street, that she could probably be using her appearance as a long-term career. What mattered to her was mattering, in her own twisted way. And in my universe, orbiting around Bella, Rosalie was a speck of dust and she knew it.

Nothing felt better than seeing the orange blinker flick on ahead of me; Emmett signaling his turn onto the ramp leading towards the hotel. When we pulled in front I planned to jump out, to run to her, to explain it and make it all right. I followed Emmett into the parking lot, pulling in right next to him.

Alice, ready to escape the confines of the backseat darted out into the lobby to check us in. Emmett, the only one in our family over eighteen, went with her as the figure of authority. I could hear Jasper and Rosalie having it out now that both were conscious again, Jasper berating his sister better than I could without eventually feeling guilty. It was a job only a brother could do.

I stood against my closed door, watching Bella through the window. She was looking straight ahead, as still as a wax figure. When she made no movement, I reached out to open her door.

"Bella," I wanted so say so much at the same time that my mind couldn't process anything. She turned to face me slowly, expressionless, and it fucking broke my heart into pieces. I hadn't blinked, praying she'd look at me – _really_ look at me – and I was afraid if I blinked I'd miss it.

Without looking up she turned her body sideways, legs dangling over the side of the seat, her hands folded in her lap. I had wanted the first move to be hers so I'd be able to ascertain how mad she was and whether or not it was aimed at me, but she really gave me nothing to read at this point. Instead, she drew me toward her like a magnet, taking the small step or two necessary to meet her. Her hands twitched before leaving her lap to rest flat against the front of my chest, drawing me in rather than pushing me away. I rested my body against the elevated passenger seat, her knees on either side of my body.

I knew I had to say something, but in the past saying nothing had seemed to work so I went with that. In retrospect, I probably should have said _something_ so she wouldn't have had the chance. "Edward, I've been thinking." _Fuck! Nothing good starts with those words…_ She lifted her eyes to meet mine, sizing me up. "With you and me, we always seem to leave a lot unsaid." And she thought _I _was the mind reader… "I mean, a lot is just _understood_ between us, but maybe we need to say it." I could hear her swallow loudly, an indicator that she wasn't done speaking. "Maybe I was a fool for assuming –" My mouth landed firmly on hers with zero hesitation. Standing in front of her put us on the same level, eye to eye. Although I couldn't vouch for her, but my eyes were tightly closed as I felt her soft lips tremble.

She pulled her face from mine, resting it between my chest and shoulder as she pulled me tighter to her. I couldn't help deepening my breaths, taking her in. Her scent was sweet and warm, romantic and pure. My arms circled her torso, holding her tightly without restricting her ability to breathe.

Her nose nuzzled against my neck, although I wasn't sure whether it was an intentional move. Without letting her go, I just wasn't ready, I allowed my lips to move to her ear – the soft velvety texture tickling my lips. "It was you, Isabella." I took another deep breath, practically tasting her, closing my eyes as if to shield myself from her reaction. "It was you."

I felt the weight of her head lift from me, but I wasn't ready to look yet. For all I knew she was furious, she might not understand, she might hate me. I felt like I didn't know anything anymore. Anything except how I felt about this girl; _that_ part was crystal clear.

"Edward." It wasn't the beginning of a sentence or asked like a question to get my attention, it was a statement in itself. I blinked once, opening my eyes to meet hers. The warm brown seemed to liquefy and deepen to reveal the feelings she couldn't yet put into words.

I wanted to be one of those guys who could use nicknames like 'baby' or 'honey' or even that cool-ass 'love' thing the Brits always seem to do, but it just wasn't me. She wasn't just some honey, baby, sweetheart to me. Isabella Swan was _it_. "_You_ were the girl in my room that night. I thought I'd dreamt you. I didn't wan to talk about it with Rosalie so Alice covered for me." She let her head drop back to my shoulder.

My anxiety level must have been slowly dropping since I was suddenly aware of the screaming match coming from my car even with all the doors and windows shut. I realized at some point they'd escape their confines and Alice and Emmett would be back any second. Before any of that happened I had to say something, something important.

Pulling back just enough to be able to look her in the eye, my hands on either side of her soft face, I made a promise to Bella Swan. "I will never make you question how I feel about you. I will never take advantaged of you. I will never give you less than you deserve. And Bella, you deserve only the best of everything this life has to offer." I was secretly hoping I hadn't ripped this from some stupid romantic piece of shit movie Alice always watches. The words said everything I needed them to, but I realize if I'd 'borrowed' them they'd have lost some credibility.

Her mouth surrounded mine and the taste of her sweet soft tongue was enough to accelerate my blood flow to places suddenly demanding their presence be known. Any question regarding her awareness was admonished with the giggle she released before pushing slightly harder against me. _Shit._ It wasn't lost on me that we were making out right in front of our hotel.

"See Jasper, I told you I didn't fuck up everything. They're fine. Practically dry humping right here in the parking lot."

"Shit," Jasper and Rosalie might swear like sailors, but at least he understood the concept of the correct time and place, "can't you just shut up and mind your own business? You know, contrary to popular belief not _everything_ has to do with you."

I was beginning to think a Hale death-match would break out at any moment when Emmett's voice boomed out easily spanning the distance between us. "We're good to go." Apparently Bella hadn't filled him in on the gory details, and I give her credit; Alice would have done a complete reenactment if it had been her. "Babe, what's wrong? I told you you would have had more fun if you stayed with me."

She responded with a half smile revealing clenched teeth. "I mean I showed Bella a good time, did I not?"

Her voice grew small and polite like when addressing someone much older. "Definitely."

My brother's eyes twinkled as his smile grew. "I told you "Henry VII" could work in rounds, right?"

She smiled and I melted, just a little.

Emmett did mostly all of the talking as we dragged our luggage into the elevator, Jasper hauling a cart filled with our equipment. The rooms were opposite one another on either side of the hallway.

Alice smiled as she faced us all, although it seemed forced to my expert eye. "Ok girls in the even room and boys in the odd room… for obvious reasons." The plan to please the parents included two rooms divided by gender although none of them was naïve enough to know that things couldn't happen if someone wanted them to. It was a mental game, like chess, and we all happily played along.

As we pulled things from our suitcases, Alice floated from room to room taking pictures as "evidence" of our best behavior. Once she felt she had sufficiently captured the essence of chastity I went across the hall to find Bella. Each room had two double beds and a small couch along with a desk and dresser. Between her tension with Rosalie and the inexplicable vibe between her and Alice I knew she'd need to get out of there. I'd been trying to figure out just what had gotten into my sister. She'd been keeping Bella at arm's length all day, even when we were all in close quarters. Once I could get her alone I'd find a way to get it out of her.

The view from the girls' room was pretty during the day, just able to see the downtown university district. I was sure at night the city would come alive from here, a vast darkness sprinkled with lights like the sky on a clear night. It appeared as though Alice and Bella were engaging in a fake conversation about the room décor that sounded more like bad acting than any exchange I'd ever heard between them before.

I shot Alice a look indicating that we'd be having a conversation later. She returned a look of incredulity, but I wasn't buying it. She knew it and dropped her eyebrows in concession.

"Bel, uh, can I see you in the hall for a second?" Her solemn expression seemed to brighten as she let me lead her out of the room carefully closing the door behind us.

I was ready to speak, but she opened her mouth and started to blurt things out before I could get the chance. "I'm starting to think that this was all a mistake." She leaned her back against the wall and slid down to sit on the plush, multi-colored rug. Sliding down beside her I put an arm around her shoulder and tried to do what would be most valuable: listen.

"I can't stop thinking about my dad. I know I really let him down and when he throws that parental line in my face, you know, that one that's all 'well I hope you had fun…' I'll probably burst into tears. I'm sorry for ruining everything. This was just a really bad idea."

"_You_ didn't ruin anything." She rested her hand on my leg letting her head fall against my shoulder. She seemed to fit into the small niche perfectly. "I know you really put yourself out there to come on this trip. And I also know you did it for me." I turned to kiss the top of her head reassuringly. "So I'm going to be the one who starts fixing things around here. There is absolutely no way I'm leaving you to fend for yourself in that room tonight. You are coming across the hall and I'll keep the hounds at bay. You're going to have fun on this trip if it kills me." I couldn't fight the urge to crack a smile. "I mean you might as well go out in a blaze of glory, right?"

That smile of hers, it just did things to me…

"So we're all gonna go eat and when we come back we'll figure out who's spending the night where, ok?" Her smile brightened further as she casually nodded.

"Oh, and Bella?" She turned her face entirely towards mine and I brushed my lips to hers. "_This_ is the farthest from you I want to be all weekend."

I hadn't realized how long it had been since she'd flushed that pale pink color until it crept up into the sides of her face. Her embarrassment made me question if that mind of hers was drifting into the dirty realm… and if it _was_ I wondered if she was thinking of how showers would be much more interesting if she and I were this close all weekend.

I was pretty sure I'd started to turn red, worried she would be suddenly able to read the flash of images once again playing through my mind.

* * *

EmPOV

All the way down the hall into the elevator, the ride down on the elevator, and the walk to the diner next door was filled with bitching and moaning about riding in the car and how it was never, ever happening again.

I don't know what was wrong with these people – so far I was having a great time.

* * *

**Author's Note: It kills me to stop here when I know what's still to come! I'll jump into Chapter 13 sometime tomorrow and should be ready to post it by next weekend. And since everyone is asking...no we don't know Alice's deal just yet. I suspect Edward and/or Bella will get to the bottom of it next chapter.**

**Thanks again for all of your support. I need to give a shout out to all of you who are recommending my story to your friends and on the boards across the web. Your word of mouth seems to really be helping me grow and I cannot thank you enough. **

**And as a break, I won't even beg for reviews this chapter – you guys have been awesome at reviewing on your own! **

**Other Songs:  
****CW McCall – Convoy  
****Herman's Hermits – I'm into Something Good  
****Herman's Hermits – Henry VIII  
****Carlos Borzenie, Sr. – My Wife Left Town with a Banana **(SO a real song!)

**Indirectly Mentioned:  
****Harry Belafonte – Banana Boat Song**


	13. Stairway to Heaven

**Author's Note: So my beta, aka my sister, bailed on me for this chapter. I edited it myself –twice – so hopefully I caught everything. I planned to get a lot farther in the story than this chapter would allow, but I suspect you will all be very pleased with the way things turned out. I hope everyone is having a wonderful first day of summer (except for those of you in the southern hemisphere – happy winter, right?). **

**And one more big shoutout to you sexy people for the Indie Awards nominations I know about and any others I don't know about. You guys are amazing. Nominations are open right now for Twific Indie Awards. Be sure to support your favorite "up-and-coming" authors and submit your nominations through June 23****rd****. **

**OK, with that said, please enjoy! **

**L. **

**As always, SM owns everything Twilight... what they do in this story is all mine...**

**Led Zeppelin – Stairway to Heaven**

* * *

Chapter 13 – Stairway to Heaven

EPOV

The thing with Rosalie was selfish, insensitive, and just plain mean. The only positive thing to be said was that, if nothing else, she was consistent. It was for this reason, the sheer inconsistency, that Alice's behavior concerned me.

Bella would have probably killed me if she knew I'd spent some serious time considering the fact that Alice might just be hormonal or something. But ultimately I figured that if her abnormality could be explained by hormones Bella would have already thought of that. No, I knew for certain there was something tangible behind her detached exterior. And as someone who'd spent most of my life knowing everything about her it suddenly felt really shitty being in the dark.

During our awkward group dinner at the diner next to the hotel I made a point of studying her. Usually all it took was one gesture or comment to complete the circuit in my head and then I would suddenly understand whatever it was I'd been missing. She was perfectly at ease with both Jasper and Emmett, openly laughing and talking with them without any discernable difference. She was definitely giving Rosalie the cold shoulder, but still they spoke and seemed almost civil by the end of the meal. Whatever it was shoved up her ass was definitely related to Bella or me. Just thinking it made me realize it was probably both of us.

Considering Alice had always been my partner in crime, my ally, the thought of finishing this trip without her help was virtually impossible. Alice was the one who smoothed over tension, who made the plans, who made things fun and who forced me to have fun when I was too stubborn to take a break. And on top of it all, she was Bella's friend. They'd been good for one another and the current atmosphere just felt _wrong_.

When she got up to use the bathroom I followed her seeing as how it was the only moment I could anticipate in which she'd be alone. I couldn't catch her before she went in but stood outside to catch her on the way out. Against the wall was a bulletin board covered in outdated flyers from events that had long passed along with ads for things associated with the local universities. The things people were selling were comical, even from my perspective. I particularly liked the kitchen table set with one missing leg and one chair being sold for $20. The flyer was tattered, obviously old, but I couldn't help wondering if anyone actually bought the deformed furniture.

I wasn't sure how I'd managed to miss it at first glance, but a bright blue flyer caught my attention. A gritty picture of our band in action was stamped across the front along with all the information for tomorrow night's show. _Alice Cullen, why do you have to make it so hard to stay mad at you?_ The flyers she put together were really good – very attention-grabbing – and she was so freaking awesome in the way that she didn't need micromanaging. She knew we needed flyers so she did them. She didn't ask a million questions. Maybe she knew we'd all defer to her preferences anyway.

She always seemed to turn up just when I was engrossed in thoughts of her. I half expected she knew I'd be waiting, but from the look on her face it was obvious that she had no clue. "Edward!" she literally jumped back a few inches, "is this an ambush or something?" She smiled but it didn't seem like she was actually happy.

"Kind of." Always better to be honest. "I just can't handle it anymore, Al."

The look on her face switched quickly from one I knew instantly as recognition to one of false confusion. She knew _exactly_ what I was referring to but didn't want to admit it. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Alice, something's going on and we both know it." I looked at her hard, using the squinted expression she often used when trying to figure me out.

"You know that only works when I do it." She was partially right, the squinting thing really was all hers, but I could always get to the bottom of things when it came to her. Finally, she put a hand on her hip, "Look all you want Edward, but there's nothing to find." She absentmindedly scratched her chin as she finished her sentence, her eyes glancing sideways away from me.

"Yeah, okay Alice. Whatever you say." Without realizing it she'd given me just enough to uncover a big clue: Alice Cullen wasn't mad, she was keeping a big, big secret.

In its own way this was actually _good_ news. Now the only challenge would be getting her to spill it – and if that was the only difficulty I had the rest of this weekend things would be smooth sailing.

_Yeah, good luck with that one… _

* * *

BPOV

It was a relief to hear Edward suggest I stay with him rather than in the room with Alice and Rosalie. If things with Alice had been normal maybe it would have been tolerable, but either way a night with Edward easily trumped anything else.

Throughout dinner I was nervous, but not really nervous. Maybe anxious was better? Anticipatory? I just wanted it to be over so we could be alone and I could plead with him to make me forget each and every thing that had gone wrong today. He always made me forget the bad things and brought the good things to life.

As the others started ordering milkshakes and pieces of pie from our waitress I reached for Edward's hand below the table and squeezed it. His thumb stroked the side of my hand and he seemed to get what I was putting out there. He reached into his back pocket for his sad-excuse-for-a-wallet wallet and tossed a few bills on the table. "We're gonna go." He held up a hand and nodded at Jasper before leading me out into the parking lot.

The way he seemed to take charge of things was beyond sexy. My mother and I had always been the "independent woman" type and whenever he took charge in little ways it always revved me up.

"So," his voice was calm and warm, "let's go get your stuff, ok?" He reached over to pull my head close, planting a kiss on my forehead. His lips seemed to burn against my skin and I could still feel them once he pulled away. The night was clear and warm, warmer than I'd have expected this early in the year, and seemed to smell like adventure.

In the elevator, his arm held me close to his side and I took in how we looked from our reflection on the opposite wall. He was just so beyond what words could describe sometimes. Each individual piece might not seem spectacular, but when it added up to Edward Cullen the whole was definitely more than the sum of his parts. I hated seeing my reflection nestled against his. It was much easier to believe I belonged with someone like him when I wasn't looking at us.

"You're beautiful." His voice caught me off guard and I wondered if he'd been watching me watch us. "I don't tell you often enough." The unevenness of his smile melted that chip on my shoulder and I felt heat run through my face. It was enough to make me lose my train of thought completely.

The fifth floor was deserted and silent as we walked down the hall, our breathing and footsteps making the only noise. I figured the people at the front desk were smart enough to keep us away from the other guests since six teenagers and a cart full of music equipment didn't exactly scream of library etiquette.

I opened the door to what was technically my room quickly – anxious to be in and out of there before the others came back. Heading through the entryway I felt myself falling to the floor until Edward's firm grasp on my arm stopped me. "Whoa, you ok?" He lifted me back into a standing position and searched my face for acknowledgement.

"Yeah. Fine. Thanks." Looking back to see what I'd tripped over revealed a pair of black patent leather stilettos so high they could only belong to one person. "Now she's trying to get me even when she's not here!" _Shit. I didn't mean to say it out loud; I had been trying my best to withhold any negativity that wasn't absolutely necessary. _Group dynamics definitely called for a different set of bitching rules than normal.

Knowing I was alone with Edward in an empty hotel room was the kind of thing that would normally send me reeling, but every surface had quickly been covered with clothes and accessories from both Rosalie and Alice's suitcases. The room was less sexy than backstage at a high school play. "Let's just get my bag and go, ok? You're right; I don't want to be in here."

Rather than answer he swung the bag over his shoulder and headed for the door, holding it open for me and shutting it behind him. The air felt lighter out in the hallway and I assumed it would be even lighter inside the boys' room if they hadn't already made it disgusting. Jasper and Emmett's clothes seemed to be mostly contained on each of the double beds and the music stuff was stacked up precisely against one wall.

"Where do you get to sleep?"

He looked around as he stretched both arms out behind him. "That's a damn good question." I allowed my eyes to follow him across the room until they rested back on the mountain of instrument cases. "Uh, I think there's a pullout couch somewhere under there."

With the lack of sleeping options I must have looked panicked that he'd send me back to the other room since he felt the need to comfort me. "I'll throw the two of them out or something later, don't worry. You're not going back there." He gestured across the hall with his thumb and I smiled picturing the same gesture used by Alice on a regular basis. I often thought of them as two different people, but there were definitely moments where their sameness stood out.

He opened the empty closet and put my bag down gently inside. I guessed he was trying to protect it from whatever dumbass idea Emmett and Jasper could come up with that had damage as a side effect.

I watched him walk towards the window, covered by drawn drapes. He spoke over his shoulder in a phony voice of seduction, "So, have you seen the view?"

I heard myself laugh before I realized I'd done it. "No, I don't think so."

In one swift motion he pulled the cord responsible for parting the drapery to reveal something _totally _unexpected. Now that the sun had set our room across the hall revealed darkness interrupted by lights from across the downtown campuses, from the sky, from the cars passing by. This window showed a completely different scene: a wall and a flight of stairs leading up.

He knew it was there apparently, watching for my expression. The scene actually elicited more questions that I would have thought possible. It appeared as though the only access to the stairs was through the window in this room, but the window had three horizontal bars on it seeming to indicate it wasn't meant to be climbed through. Then it hit me that the room was on the top floor, how could there be a staircase leading up if we were already at the top of the building? Nothing about it made sense, and maybe that was why it was so exciting.

"Where do you think it goes?" He seemed surprised by my question and obviously hadn't given it any real thought before.

His eyes looked through the window to the dark stairs before turning back to me. "Other than up I really don't know. The roof I guess."

I took his hand in mine, suddenly filled with adrenaline. "Let's go see." I pulled him to the window and reached for the latch to swing the pane out into the exceptionally warm air not yet overcome by the chill of the night.

"Bella, I don't think we're supposed to go out there. And anyway, I'm having trouble keeping you upright down here; What am I going to do with you up on the roof?"

I'd already climbed over the three bars by the time he'd finished speaking. "I won't fall off, I promise." I smiled at him from the other side of the window, daring him to follow. "Haven't you noticed? I'm breaking all the rules now." It felt good to say even if it was a slight over-exaggeration.

He took the bait and climbed through the window without hesitation. It was dark on the landing and the stairway was unlit except for the blue cast from the nearly-full moon. I heard Edward close the window and felt him behind me before I heard him. His mouth was close to my ear, his warm wet breath felt with each word, "There's a lady who's sure all that glitters is gold…"

A shiver ran up my spine and my knees felt weak. I knew the lyric, I knew what followed, and I finished it in my head: _…And she's buying a stairway to heaven._

I took a deep breath. Looking up I noticed the stars peeking from the top of the staircase and couldn't help smiling. Giving his hand a squeeze, I took the first step. I didn't have to look back to know he was smiling too.

* * *

APOV

I knew it wasn't right to let them leave like that. Pretending I didn't care was harder than I could have ever imagined.

I nearly collided with our waitress as she returned with a large tray of desserts as I ran for the door only minutes behind them.

Jasper's voice momentarily stopped me in my tracks: "Al, where are you going?"

Turning back to the door, I answered him over my shoulder. "To fix everything before it's too late." It was really more of a wish than a statement.

Bella had known something was up since before we left, that much was obvious. I hated that distance was the only way I'd be able to keep quiet, but even I knew I couldn't keep a secret and telling Bella what I knew just _wasn't _an option.

It didn't help things that Rosalie chose today to remove her mask of civility. Although I knew Rosalie believed what she said to be true – she hadn't known the girl in his room was Bella – telling her about it was just cruel.

While I knew there would be consequences for telling Bella everything, for explaining the reason behind how I'd been acting, I decided they couldn't be any worse than what I was now feeling. To fix things with Bella I'd take my chances with the unknown.

Stepping out into the hallway from the elevator felt purposeful as I took oversized steps towards our room. Knocking was only an afterthought once the door had been unlocked realizing that hotel rooms _did _often lead to nudity. It didn't matter either way; they weren't there. And right where Bella's large duffel bag had been was now an empty space.

_This was bad, very bad. _

I listened carefully before knocking on the door across the hall, _just in case_. Even with an ear pressed to the door the quiet was deafening. Knocking softly and building to a loud pounding still yielded no hint of movement, no scuttling sounds, and no one answering the door.

Feeling as though guilt had been melted and injected into me, I couldn't help blaming myself for whatever it was going on. If I had just told her everything from the beginning this wouldn't be happening, we'd have had a much better drive out here, and I wouldn't be having the sneaking suspicion that Bella had run away or something. _What_ would I tell Chief Swan if that was true?

I dialed Bella first, but I knew the odds of her answering weren't good. When it went right to voicemail I immediately tried Edward knowing one wasn't usually far from the other. He, on the other hand, always answered his phone. Unless he was purposely ignoring someone. In the past I was pretty sure that someone had never been me, but with all the drama going on today I couldn't swear to it. Hearing his loud ringtone through the door surprised me. I was 99.9% sure they weren't in there unless they were dead or in the shower. _Oh God! _The possibility hadn't even crossed my mind until now.

Weighing out the options I decided interrupting anything potentially…_private_ would be worth the risk if it meant finding out whether he was not answering his phone because they were dead. Even I knew the odds were against the melodrama, but it was a risk I wasn't willing to take.

Pressing a speed-dial button I lifted the small pink phone to my ear. "Jasper! Please come back to the rooms right away. Bring your key." I didn't elaborate and he didn't ask. I _loved_ that about him.

When he showed up I was sitting in the middle of the hall with my head anxiously resting in one hand. I popped up before he was close enough to touch and prompted him to quickly open the door. "Be prepared to shield your eyes."

Jasper, suddenly realizing what I'd said, stopped before opening the door. "What exactly am I interrupting in here?"

"They're either naked or dead." I leaned across him to push the door all the way open expecting to see pools of blood on the carpet and splatter patterns across the walls. Instead, what I saw was nothing. No trace that they had been there. It was partly a relief to find them neither naked nor dead, but not finding them at all was still troublesome.

Dialing Bella's number was of no use since her phone was probably off and trying Edward again was just as unproductive seeing how his phone started to ring loudly from inside a jacket pocket. _This _was why God invented cell phones! For _emergencies_!

I tapped one foot as I dialed over to Emmett who was undoubtedly still engrossed in the oversized dessert he had ordered himself. "Em, we're gonna need you guys back over here, _now_. Yeah, apparently we've got a case of missing persons on our hands!"

"Persons or _people_?" Jasper looked puzzled as if trying to figure things out.

"It doesn't matter." Why must he choose now to start asking questions?

Exactly 49% of me blamed myself for everything going on right now and the other 51% blamed Rosalie for opening her big fat mouth. She might get an ego boost from stepping on others, but from my perspective it wasn't worth the fallout.

They showed up quicker than I'd expected, especially once I saw Rosalie perched on Emmett's back, piggyback style. "Why…" I couldn't even formulate what I was thinking into a coherent question.

"The lot was too dusty. I don't know. Rosalie said that dust was bad for very expensive shoes." He continued to carry her down the length of the hallway.

"What's her excuse about hotel carpeting then?" I hadn't meant to be as catty as I was, it just seemed to slip out.

Sliding from his back and standing directly in front of me, she looked down at me with an unamused expression. "So what'd they do now? They seem to cause drama wherever they go."

_That. Was. It._

"Rosalie Hale you are more ridiculous than you are pretty, and I know how highly you think of yourself. You should feel responsible for the fact that both Edward and Bella left, _without their phones_, and all Bella's stuff is missing. Things have been crappy ever since you opened your mouth earlier and it's about time you felt a little remorse."

Jasper slid his arm around my waist; I suspected it was an act of both literal and figurative support. "Well, I could always _make_ her feel it." His sly smile usually sent goosebumps up and down my arms, but the anger and frustration of dealing with Rosalie had me too amped for goosebumps.

"No, she's gonna feel it because somewhere in her wonder bra enhanced chest is a heart that I believe, on some level, cares about other people. What if she ran off trying to do something stupid and got hurt? What if something _really_ bad happened?" I knew I was playing things up, but I believed she was capable of feeling and I wasn't going to be proven wrong.

"The odds that anything bad happened are slim to none. I don't spend my precious time or energy worrying about things like that." If Jasper hadn't tightened his grip I'd have had my small hands around her neck by now.

"Yeah, well slim odds or not you're going out to find them with us. And _that_ is something I will have Jasper _make_ you do if necessary." It felt good being assertive with her for a change instead of on the receiving end of her demands.

* * *

RPOV

Shit, why the fuck did they have to up and disappear, spinning Alice into some kind of tizzy? They're practically grown ups, they'd be fine. There was no way in hell I'd accept responsibility for any of this. All I did was speak the truth.

Alice ordered, fucking _ordered_ Emmett and me to ask about them at the front desk. And of course, Emmett said yes before I even have time to refute. If I'd had an extra moment I'd have had his mind on things that didn't involve his brother at all and involved Bella Swan even less.

But once he agreed I couldn't say anything; they already had me pegged as a cold-hearted bitch and I really, really disliked proving them right.

Realistically, it was probably like a half-of-one-percent of missing people who are actually hurt or dead. And these people weren't even missing, they were _misplaced_. I mostly just followed behind Emmett as we made our way through the shiny lobby, watching the way his jeans hugged him in just the right way. I was glad I'd talked him out of those oversized, falling down your ass jeans that reveal nothing at all. The man had a sexy ass, might as well accentuate it. It's what I'd do anyway.

His voice was serious, like he was on a mission. "Hi, we're gonna need your help. We're looking for a guy and a girl we seem to have lost somewhere along the way. Maybe you've seen them?" He delivered it so smoothly I couldn't help questioning whether he'd been mentally rehearsing that in the elevator.

"Well, honey, I'll sure try and help you. Can you give me a little more to go on?" The woman behind the counter was probably closing in on fifty if her crow's feet told the truth, although I'd believe her as a few years older. The blah polyester blazer she wore as a uniform probably didn't help.

I imagined Emmett's way of doing this would drag things out much longer than was necessary. It would be much easier to just take control. "Tall guy with messy hair – you'd totally know it if you ever saw it. And the girl…well, she's got long brown hair, very plain, and had on some kind of coat – green I think. She probably looked either pissed or suicidal." Emmett's elbow to my ribs was _not_ quite the token of thanks I'd been expecting… couldn't he appreciate that I was getting things done this way?

"I'm not sure about this boy you're describing. But a girl lookin' a lot like that was just out in front, by the highway, with her thumb hitched higher than all getout." Her weathered hand pointed toward the front door.

_Fuck me._ "You think you saw this girl _hitchhiking_?" One nod from the receptionist told me I'd be dead and buried before morning if that girl tried to hitchhike her way home from here.

I pulled Emmett behind me by the sleeve of his shirt. "Babe, you're supposed to say 'thank you' when someone helps you." He planted himself long enough to turn his head and loudly thank the woman for "all of her assistance."

_Christ, get off it already. Politeness could be _so_ overrated. _I pulled him the rest of the way out of the lobby looking around through the darkness for anyone resembling Edward or Bella. With the lack of lighting available every goddamn leaf, twig, and bush seemed to resemble Edward and Bella.

"I don't see a thing out here. That woman didn't know what she was talking about." We came, we saw, we best be getting back upstairs…

"Rose, Alice is worried sick for some reason. That's not like her. I promised her we'd help." His eyes sometimes got this soft, pleading look that was very hard to argue with. Even for someone who absolutely loved to argue.

I was trying to think up some kind of "rational" rebuttal when movement in the distance caught my attention. _Fuck._ There was _definitely_ someone standing out by the highway and her green coat and long brown hair could not be any clearer. _Fuck! _

I mean the girl never really wowed me, but even I knew it was a fucking bad idea to hitchhike along the highway. And no matter how much I hated that any little snafu in this weekend would be blamed on me thanks to Bella Swan, there was no way in hell I was letting this girl get into a strange car. Maybe my fucking big sister instinct was kicking in or something.

"I hate you Isabella Swan." The words were meant to be silent, but instead they came out audibly, crystal clear in fact.

Emmett looked momentarily outraged, but I didn't give two shits. If dragging this girl back to the hotel by her hair would make everyone happy than I'd do it. I tried pretending I wasn't ruining my heels as I stumbled across the dusty lot and attempted to navigate the overgrown strip of land leading to the side of the road. Just as I got close enough to call her name a deafening sound made me cover my ears. The oversized shiny semi, complete with orange lights outlining its immense structure, pulled off the road just in front of her. I could see the window roll down and a cloud of smoke drifted out as a few mystery words were exchanged.

"Bella!" I shouted as loud as my lungs would allow. "I'm sorry, ok? Don't do this!" But it didn't matter, she'd climbed up into the cab and the truck was nothing more than a few blurry lights in the distance.

It felt like the wind had been knocked out of me. Bella had just been whisked away by some strange trucker in an attempt to hitchhike home. A distinctive smell drifted past as the wind blew against me. _Pot_. _Great._ Make that Bella had just been whisked away by some pot smoking strange trucker in an attempt to hitchhike home. If I didn't find a way to fucking fix this I'd be using my thumb, and a fair bit of leg, to get myself home too.

It was easy to make jokes inside, but it didn't feel funny to watch it happen. If Bella Swan ended up raped, beaten, and/or dead as a result of what just happened I'd never, ever forgive myself. The admission itself was a big step since it surprised even me.

"I think Bella just got into that truck." Emmett had somehow managed not to see the whole thing play out. "First we're gonna tell Alice and then we're calling the police."

Without looking back I headed inside to deliver the worst news of my entire life, suddenly genuinely worried.

* * *

It was obvious. Alice could tell from the look on my face that something wasn't right. Her eyes grew wide and white. "What happened?"

I sat on the edge of my bed, dropping my head into my hands. As we came up to the room to find Alice I found each step bringing more and more disturbing thoughts to mind. Every _Law & Order_ episode I'd ever seen seemed to play out along with disturbing scenes from various horror movies.

A tear leaked from one eye and I wiped it away quickly. "Al, I tried to stop her. I swear. And not like 'oh, yeah, I tried to try,' I mean I really tried. Ask Emmett."

"Yeah, Al. Seriously. She ran into the bushes and everything."

She looked petrified. "Tell me what happened."

"The lady at the front desk told us she saw a girl with long dark hair hitchhiking out by the highway." I felt the tears building but willed them to subside. "I saw her out there, and I tried to go after her, but a big semi pulled up and she got in."

"Oh my god. What about Edward?"

"We didn't see him anywhere. I don't know what to do. Fuck! I hate thinking of her out there with some goddamn perv or something." Hearing myself was like an out-of-body experience. The voice sounded like me, but the words didn't sound familiar. "Edward will have my head over this when he finds out. I swear I was screaming as loud as I could, but the truck was too loud. I just watched her climb in and saw her green coat disappear into the cab."

"Wait!" Alice was suddenly lost in her own thoughts.

"What?" Emmett, god bless his sweet ass, was just a step behind with everything.

"Shh! Wait!"

"What?" It was starting to seem like a dumbed-down version of an old Abbott and Costello routine.

"You said green, green coat, right?" She turned to Jasper and repeated her question.

"Yeah, Al. It was green. I'm positive." I felt the knot in my stomach tighten and a few dry sobs escaped me. She hugged me before I could blink and I felt my tears absorbing into her shirt. "I'm so sorry, for everything."

"No, Rose, it's ok." I actually saw her smile, which seemed to only make the tears come faster.

"I don't understand." I wiped them away mentally chanting for the tears to stop.

"It was blue. She was wearing a blue coat. It wasn't her."

Understanding enveloped me like a security blanket. _It wasn't her_. Taking a few deep breaths I felt myself unclench for the first time since I thought I'd let Bella get away. "Thank God." I was pretty sure they were all waiting for some kind of snide comment to follow, but the relief I felt was so gargantuan that there was nothing to joke about.

Jasper's face was smug and I wanted to smack him before he even opened his mouth. "See, Rose – you got your panties in a twist over nothing."

"Don't be a shithead." I think he knew I was serious.

* * *

EPOV

If the night had been colder it would have killed the mood. Able to sit on the cool roof observing the dark, speckled sky with Isabella Swan was literally like a dream come true. Especially when she rested her head over my heart and her hand mere inches from the one place I simultaneously wished she would and wouldn't touch at any given moment.

Things were so quiet up there. Too quiet really considering four very loud people were nearby. It was unusual for no one to have called us in all the time we'd been away; usually someone was compulsively calling to ask something or have me settle some kind of stupid-ass bet ala, "No, Emmett, Horny was _not_ one of Santa's reindeer." Although I was pretty sure after the fact that the bet had had something to do with getting me to say "horny" rather than answering the question at hand. Bunch of idiots!

I planned on sending a text to Alice telling her not to worry, something told me she was worrying, but despite feeling all of my pockets my phone was suspiciously absent.

"Bel?"

"Hmm?" She sounded like I'd woken her. How damn cute is that?

"Do you have your phone on you? I just wanna tell Alice not to worry."

I thought she'd drifted off again but her relaxed voice started up again after a moment. "I think I left it in my bag. I'm sorry." She looked up from her position on my chest, pressing her lips to the hollow of my neck forcing me to swallow hard.

"Maybe I should go down there. I just have this feeling things aren't okay with her." The last thing I wanted to do with ask Bella to move off me, to leave her for even a moment, and potentially burst the bubble of perfection we'd managed to establish up here.

I had a feeling her thoughts were on a similar track when she volunteered to do it instead. "Edward, I'll go. I'm less likely to get sucked into whatever kind of drama is going on down there. I'll be _right_ back, ok?"

Instead of answering I allowed myself to stroke her cheek, my hand lightly tracing down her neck and shoulder and along the side of her body. She must have taken my actions in the affirmative and headed for the angular stairway. If coming up here was heaven, I knew what going back down would be…

While my thoughts repeatedly drifted into the realm of filth, even when Bella was here, I gave it enough slack to run wild in the moments while she was gone. The bluish light from the moon, so round and large it looked like I could reach out and touch it, made her face glow in this sexy, supernatural way. I couldn't help picturing what the rest of her would look like – bare skin glowing in the moonlight. Not that the thought wasn't enough to rev my engine, but I allowed the scene to play out beneath my closed eyes. I wanted to take in every inch of her, to run my hands over her body and _show_ her that my sole existence seemed to be for her. If she asked me to keep going I would and if she asked me to stop I would, even in my fantasy. No matter how good it made me feel, it was for her. It was _all_ for her.

She managed to snuggle back up into me before I heard her approach. "Slight problem." She didn't seem very concerned for a woman with a problem. Without prompting she went on to explain. "It appears as though we've locked ourselves out here." Her fingers traced up under the side of my shirt where my stretching had lifted it. I felt them trace along the edge of my underwear, the waistband of my boxer-briefs the sole barricade between her hand and the depths below. She was so damn good at making me forget anything and everything I'd been thinking.

I know somewhere I was wondering if she tried knocking on the window to get someone's attention, but even if I had been able to formulate the words I didn't really give a fuck. A locked window meant they were just as likely to be kept out, and if even one of the thoughts I was having was even _close_ to actualization I wanted all of them as far from me as possible.

"No one was there, or I would have knocked. I guess we'll just have to try again later." Her tone was playful, not at all bothered by this 'predicament' if that's what you'd call it. If she wasn't worried then I sure as hell wasn't going to worry – maybe this was _just_ what we needed.

I felt her hand rest flat, palm side down, against my abdomen. I couldn't help sucking in a bit trying to emphasize the six pack I'd been working on. Ok, so I'd been working on it for the past four years, but it was finally starting to show. Her fingertips traced light circles and I'd forgotten to breathe. It was only the sound of her voice that brought me back. "So, be honest with me, ok? Do you think what I did – you know, coming on this trip without permission – was sexy rebel behavior or the stupidest thing I could have possibly done?"

Running my fingers through her long, soft hair in an attempt to soothe her, I answered truthfully. "Both. But right now the sexy thing is totally winning out." The cool night air must be bringing out my daring side…

"You think I'm sexy?" _God. She knows I do! _What _is this girl trying to do to me?_

"Maybe." Feigning disinterest at this point would be less embarrassing than admitting that sexy didn't quite cover exactly what I thought of her.

The air was either bringing out Bella's daring side too or not providing enough oxygen. She ran both hands under my shirt again, up along my abs and chest and back down again resting on my hips. "Maybe?"

The game wasn't working. And at this rate I would definitely, definitely be the one to lose. "Isabella you have no idea how incredibly sexy you are. And _that_ only adds to it." It felt both wonderful and nauseating to be so completely upfront with her.

Watching her face flush turned her fair skin purple in the tinted light. That confident exterior was still there, but her slight embarrassment reminded me that it was part of the charade. "I love that I make you blush so easily." I caught her scent in the air and leaned into her neck for a long inhalation, holding the air in my lungs. "Whatever you're wearing – that scent – it does something to me. I noticed it the first day I met you. You're…intoxicating."

She lay on her side, facing me, unfazed by the hard surface beneath us. A playful smile curled at her lips. "You know what it's called, don't you?" She played with her hair releasing the scent to me again.

Moving my face back to her neck, I whispered my response: "Tell me," my lips pressing into her warm skin.

"Heaven."

Her response was limited to one word. Partially because the answer was only one word and partially because after she said that word I covered her mouth immediately in mine. It was funny that all this time I'd been saying she smelled like heaven and I was right. But in the moment not one thing was funny. I wanted to cover every surface of her with kisses until she forced me to stop. I wanted to explore every spot I'd fantasized about. For someone with virtually no sexual experience I was feeling pretty confident in my abilities, probably because I'd do anything in this world to make this girl feel good.

For every hard kiss I dished out she gave me two in return. The air, still mild despite the late hour, suddenly seemed cool in contrast to the heat of the air in the slim space between us. I let myself slide my hand from her hip around to the curve of her ass. I'd been dreaming of grabbing her like this, roughly, but it wasn't really _rough_ it was _passionate_. She moaned into my ear, "Don't stop." And I thought I'd explode then and there. _Fuck!_ Maybe I _was_ a little overly confident…

She pushed her hips into me, rolling me onto my back and pushing herself on top. The heat of her body was indescribable and I could feel myself straining against her waist. _Shit, one move and I'm all over with…_

Bella slowed down enough to speak, a break I was actually thankful for. "There are times I want to go slow with you and times like this where I never want to stop." She kept her eyes focused on mine as she lifted my hand to her chest. "I don't want you to stop either."

I kept my hand where she'd left it, massaging her gently. I knew that all the reasons she wanted to keep going tonight were the same reasons why I should stop things, or at least slow them down. Everything was a first for us, and as incredibly sexy as the thought of making love to Bella in the moonlight above the city was, I wanted our first time to be private rather than on display.

"Bella," I was practically choking on the words as I struggled to speak them, "are you sure this is a good idea?" The weight of her body was pushing into my waist, only increasing my ache for her. Trying to maintain level-headed was much more of a challenge than normal.

She backed up into a kneeling position, looking down on me with a sly smile, before slowly pulling up the bottom of her shirt with both hands and up over her head.

_Fuck!_

"Bella – you – " the finger she placed on my lips instantly silenced me. The black bra she revealed was so much fucking hotter than I was even imagining. The whole thing was some sheer kind of fabric leaving absolutely nothing to the imagination. And to be quite honest having to use my imagination was getting pretty old in its own right.

In the blue light she seemed to glow. Her hair, reflecting the moonbeams, shined with every shake of her head. The pale blue cast now painted across her chest and torso was breathtaking. "Isabella," she shifted her weight until she was straddling my waist, her weight focused almost entirely on the throbbing she was bringing to maximum levels. I wanted to say just the right thing, something romantic, something to show her that this was not about sex. Ok, not _just_ about sex. When nothing came to me the only thing I could think to say was, "So fucking beautiful."

Holding her hips in place I sat up to meet her. I was so fucking hard I almost felt like pressing into her should be painful, but as she wiggled her hips closer to mine I realized she _liked_ it. This sweet, beautiful girl of mine fucking liked to feel what she did to me. In fact, she wanted to be closer to it. I went straight for her neck, kissing and sucking in the warm hollows that tasted of salty sweetness.

Although I couldn't see her barely-covered chest from this position, I could feel it pressing against me and the image had long been burned into my brain. Picturing her, aroused from the cool air, brought my hand up to stroke her, almost attempting to decipher whether there was any chance this was really happening. The sound she made as my fingers made contact with her confirmed that in every way, shape, and form this was 100% for real.

Rhythmically rocking into me was torturous enough, but when she reached down and put her hand against the part of me most screaming for her touch I couldn't prevent the moan I let out right into her ear.

Of course, that happened to be the same moment we heard it. A small voice screaming very loudly from somewhere below us. "Bella Swan! If you can hear me, I am worried sick about you. I'm so sorry for everything! Please come back!"

_Shit! _The voice was unmistakable and the timing impeccable. Aside from her as an interruption she'd probably be getting hauled off by the police for screaming out in the parking lot at what had to be almost 3 o'clock. There was no way we could ignore her.

"Oh, God. Is that Alice?"

"The one and only." I hadn't realized my hand was still firmly holding Bella's soft chest until my sister's image ruined the moment.

"I guess we'd better see what that's about?" She turned it into a question as if saying 'Nah, forget her! Can I grope you some more?' was even an option.

I shrugged. "Yeah, or else she'll get Emmett or someone to start screaming too. And I don't have enough money on me for bail." She grinned at me as if surprised by something, I couldn't figure out what. I leaned in to press my lips to hers again, tugging on her bottom lip before pulling away. I reached for her shirt and slid it over her head, very sorry to cover her up now that I knew exactly what she was hiding.

I stood first, holding out a hand to help her up. We both walked slower than necessary to the stairs knowing we didn't want to go.

I had forgotten about the locked window until we reached it. Lifting a hand to knock I watched as Bella touched it lightly with her fingertips, swinging it open into the room. She looked over her shoulder with batted lashes and an expression of innocence. "Oops. Guess it was open the whole time."

_Nice_. I had _definitely _met my match with this girl.

I helped her climb into the room and couldn't help smiling as she sang to herself in a barely audible voice.

_When she gets there she knows  
If the stores are all closed  
With a word she can get what she came for._

I recognized the words right away, hearing the next line in my head: _And she's buying a stairway to heaven._

* * *

BPOV

Leaving the roof with Edward gave exactly the same sensation as waking up from a fantastic dream. I felt like it was all right there, within my grasp, but simply unavailable at the moment. And if the sensation of his hands against me in all new ways wasn't enough to satisfy my need for him I could always think about that towel some more. Knowing that he'd have to shower while we were here added a little something to that fantasy.

I hadn't given thought to the fact that the room might be occupied, although thankfully there was nothing to see. Hopefully Alice didn't have everyone out walking the streets looking for us. He walked with his hand on the small of my back and I felt arousal at his slightest touch. Perhaps descending the staircase wasn't enough to take us off that roof after all…

Opening the door into the hallway we noticed the door to the other room was wide open. Rosalie and Emmett sat on her bed. I hadn't seen her with an expression like this before, looking like someone had just run over her puppy or something.

When her eyes made contact with my shape in the doorway they grew wide and she quickly stood. "I am so glad to see you!" I figured she was talking to Edward and moved aside. Although the thought of Rosalie being glad to see me was kind of entertaining.

Instead of heading for Edward in the doorway she came purposefully over to me and pulled me into an awkward, one-sided hug. "Me?"

She must have realized she revealed too much and tried to backpedal. "Um, yeah. Alice had us thinking you were dead or something. I guess I'm glad you're not." I had a feeling this was Rosalie's way of apologizing for everything earlier.

"Uh, thanks." I looked back at Edward who seemed amused, but he only shrugged his shoulders. Turning back to Rosalie, I said the only thing that came to me even though it didn't really make sense. "I guess I'm glad you're not dead too." We'd never be best friends, but this was a start.

Emmett piped in at just the right time. "I don't mean to interrupt the love fest in here or anything, but if we don't go stop our sister," he looked directly at Edward, "she'll be in jail or committed by morning."

Edward smiled, but only halfway. "Yeah, we heard her screaming out front from up on the roof." I didn't like that he'd disclosed our secret location, but it was true – we had to go find her ASAP.

"Oh, so _that's_ where you were. Shit, Alice started pulling out her junior CSI kit. She thought Bella ran away because of her."

All right, whatever was going on with Alice was going to be dealt with right now. To do it I'd have to find her. "Let's go down and get her." I really spoke only to Edward, needing his support to confront his harebrained sister. Emmett and Rosalie followed us out of the room and disappeared into the one across the hall. No words were exchanged between Rosalie and me, but there was definitely a whispered exchange between Emmett and Edward right behind me.

In the elevator I asked him about it. "I don't know what he was talking about. I just smiled and nodded as he went on about bananas. Something about leaving with a banana." Everything in Edward's body language conveyed confusion.

I laughed a full belly laugh for the first time in a while. "I, uh, think you just got sexiled."

"You got _that_ from 'banana'?

"Thank Jasper for teaching him that little trick." I could tell Edward didn't get it, but at this point he didn't seem to care.

I blushed as he kept his hand on that very low part of my back, a gentlemanly habit that seemed to excite me more each time he did it. As my shirt rode up a bit in the back his thumb brushed against the bare spot somewhere between my back and butt. He escorted me out through the front door and finding Alice wasn't difficult. She was seated on the curb with Jasper standing directly in front of her, facing us.

He quickly absorbed the sight of us and smiled, looking down to Alice. "Al, I just have this feeling things are going to be ok." I knew he said it in response to us, but just hearing him say it brought a wave of reassurance over me.

Following his gaze, Alice turned to look over her shoulder and burst into tears at the sight of us standing on the sidewalk behind her. Seeing her like that brought tears to my eyes too; she was like this because she cared about me. I couldn't help wondering what I'd done to deserve a friend like Alice Cullen.

She wrapped her arms around my neck, hugging me tightly to her. "I was so worried that something bad happened to you. " My arms quickly reciprocated the embrace. "I'm so sorry Bella."

The guys gave us space, both standing back as we bent to sit on the curb side-by-side. Alice rested her head on my shoulder as she wiped away a few leftover tears. "I should have told you everything from the beginning. I hate keeping things from you. And you too for that matter." She had gestured her towards Edward but immediately came back to me. "I was asked to keep a pretty big secret and I tried my best to do it. I just promised him I wouldn't say anything and I hate, hate, hate to break promises."

She really sounded more like she was apologizing to herself for what she was about to do rather than to me for everything she'd done. But realistically it was better this way; she had her apology written all over her face.

I must have been on some kind of delay, just realizing she'd said something about keeping a secret for _him_. I couldn't help looking at Edward with alarm seeing as how he was the only 'him' I could imagine telling secrets to Alice. Well maybe Emmett or Jasper too, but in the context of the moment both seemed highly unlikely.

"Don't even _think_ about looking at me." His expression was genuine. "I'm hearing this all for the first time too."

If she wasn't talking about him then this should all be _very _interesting. I looked back into her sad eyes and, although Edward was standing behind her I was positive she could feel the intensity of his gaze.

She was obviously preparing to tell us whatever the 'big secret' was, and she stood to face her audience letting a barely-whispered, "ok, here goes nothing" slip from between her pouty lips. She made me smile despite the fact she had given me this churning feeling in the pit of my stomach – the kind that could only be alleviated by the expedited telling of much-needed information.

"Bella, please, please don't be mad." She took an enormously deep breath, knowing how much air she'd need to tell the story in one fell swoop. "But I went to see your dad before we left."

I didn't know what I was feeling or if I was even hearing her anymore, all I knew was that the _him_ who had asked Alice to keep a secret from me was Chief Swan in all his secretive glory. I turned my eyes back up to her and she began to continue. "I just _knew_ something wasn't right and I _might_ have overheard something Edward was saying to you on the phone and when I saw your face this morning when you showed up I just put it all together. And I _know_ people say this is all speculation and unreliable, but I definitely saw images of you 'grounded for life' in your future." She started to pace in front of us as she spoke and Edward stepped from the sidewalk to sit beside me on the low cement curb. "I made Jasper take me to see him."

Listening was normally easier for me than speaking, but she wasn't getting to it quick enough this time. "Alice, what exactly did you say to him?" I tried to picture Alice confronting my dad with some kind of serious information but the image just wouldn't formulate.

My question threw her for an unexpected loop. "Uh, well.. uh, well I really just said I was afraid you were about to make a big, huge mistake." She met my eyes before looking away quickly. "And he of course thought you were running off to Vegas to get married or something so it was a huge relief when I clarified that you were planning to come on our trip with or without his permission." This time she calculatingly met my eyes and held them there. "I wasn't trying to rat you out or anything Bella, I just wanted to make things ok before we left. I mean, I knew Edward had tried and got shot down, but I thought just maybe –"

I couldn't let her go on without acknowledging the revelation. "Wait," I turned to Edward on my right. "I thought you chick – er, didn't go to see my dad? You said you didn't go."

"Yeah," he seemed embarrassed to be answering in front of Alice and Jasper. "I guess I did." I let him off the hook on that one for now, but I'd be asking for elaboration later on, for sure.

Alice, unable to keep quiet once she'd begun, picked up right where she had left off. "He actually sat and heard me out, Bella. I don't know why. But as long as he gave me the chance to talk I took it. I really just said that I didn't want you to come home and never see the light of day again. I told him that as your very best friend I would look out for you. I promised you'd arrive home in one piece and without a wedding ring on if he would just reconsider things."

Just knowing my father heard all of this from Alice surprised me into paralysis. You could have knocked me over with a feather.

"And, believe it or not kiddo," Alice's mood was lightening considerably once the truth was finally out there, "he told me you were allowed to come with us under one condition."

Edward put an arm around my shoulder, easing my mind a bit before I spoke again. "I'm afraid to ask, but what was the condition?"

The smile slowly spreading across her face was priceless. She had looked so depressed earlier I thought she might never look happy again. "That I not tell you."

_Shit, he was good! _"But you just told me."

"Well, _now_ you'll understand why I couldn't be near you all day. I knew I wouldn't last all weekend, but I had to try for your sake. And you were just so upset." She didn't really need to say anymore, I understood completely. "Bella? I've never seen your acting skills, but you better be good enough to fool him when you get home or you're toast."

I couldn't believe I was still reminding myself to give my dad more credit. He was damn good and he knew it. He'd probably been chuckling to himself all weekend about this one. Of course, there was no way in hell I'd be getting off scot-free on this one; after all my dad knew I was leaving town without his permission and there was no way I was lucky enough that he'd forget to punish me for it. But I didn't want to ruin the moment.

I couldn't think of one thing to say to Alice, not because I was mad but because she did a brave thing and I was lucky to have a friend like her. Instead of trying to sum up the amalgamation of feelings I was having, I stood up and wrapped her in a tight hug which she mirrored instantly. "Al, you're a great friend." She stepped back and gave me a little wink which I knew was Alice's way of implying, "enough said."

The four of us walked back through the lobby to the elevators and rode quietly up to our floor. It seemed to be just hitting us that we'd had a very, very long day.

They paused just outside the door of Alice's room. "You guys go ahead, ok?" Once they disappeared I turned back to Edward and rested both hands on his chest. "So," I couldn't help tilting my head as I spoke, "you went to see my father?"

His lips parted into a smile revealing the whites of his teeth. "Uh yeah." As he lifted a hand my eyes were drawn to it, following its path through his messy hair. "And he pretty much told me your sassy mouth was the reason I was being shot down."

If my tendency toward blushing could be turned off with a switch I'd be flipping it right now for sure. "Why didn't you tell me?" Although, knowing him, I thought I knew why…

He rubbed the back of his neck this time before answering. "I didn't want you to hate your dad. I thought having you disappointed in me for a few days would be better."

I wanted to kiss him, but instead I resisted the urge and led him by the hand. "Where are we going?" _Silly boy, if you think about it I'm pretty sure you know._

Banging on the door to the "boys" room, I wasn't very surprised to see Emmett answer the door half dressed but wearing a look of frustration. "Excellent, excellent timing." Rosalie, beneath a blanket on one of the beds, scowled in the direction of the door.

"Yeah, well." I didn't want to give her the satisfaction of an apology from me so soon after I'd received one from her. Kind of. "We're just passing through."

I opened the closet and pulled out the extra blanket and pillows intended for the buried pullout couch before opening the window and climbing through it. I motioned for Edward to follow, which he did without hesitation. "You know where to find us if you need us." My eyes shifted from Emmett to Rosalie. "But _don't_ need us."

I yanked the drapes closed and shut the window quietly before taking his strong hand in mine and leading him slowly up the steps.

* * *

**Author's Note: The characters TOTALLY took over this chapter. I was supposed to get through their big performance and a bunch of other things, but apparently Edward and Bella couldn't keep their hands off each other. And who am I to interrupt? **

**I apologize if the shifting perspectives was confusing, but I was as curious to see what Alice and Rosalie had to say for themselves as the rest of you. **

**Please share your feedback – I really do consider it all! **

**And in case I don't say it often enough – thanks for sticking with me for another chapter. **

**xoxo L. **


	14. Wish You Were Here

**Author's Note: Ok, here it is – my mea culpa. I have to apologize to everyone for taking so long to get this new chapter done. It wasn't planned and, as we all know, life can sometimes throw us for a loop. I've had some issues the last few weeks and despite many, many attempts at writing, I had too much on my mind to focus on what I was doing. You guys deserved much better than that. I also want to apologize for not responding to the last several reviews submitted. I read each one and seriously – you guys warm my heart. **

**I've been really good (up until now) about updating regularly, and I hope to be back to that pretty quickly. I don't plan on making you guys wait forever for every chapter and I hope you're still willing to move forward with me. **

**A big, BIG thanks to all of you who helped me achieve the FOUR initial Indie TwiFic Award nominations (****Best Alternate Universe Human WIP, Best Use of Comedy WIP, Best Use of Music as Inspiration WIP, and Most Romantic Moment WIP). **

**I have made it through to the SECOND ROUND of voting in the category of Best Use of Music as Inspiration so if you think I deserve it, please go to http://theindietwificawards[dot]com and vote for Tragic Turn. Voting is open until midnight on Wednesday, July 29****th****. **

**And without further ado, please enjoy. **

**L. **

**And, as always, everything **_**Twilight **_**belongs to SM…**

**Pink Floyd – Wish You Were Here**

* * *

Chapter 14 – Wish You Were Here

EPOV

I'd love to say things picked up right where they left off. My hands instantly moved back to Bella's warm chest as hers crept further south… But instead the events of a very long day seemed to take their toll, and sleep jumped to the top of our priority list.

I couldn't help smiling as I watched her carefully fold the blanket and set out two pillows; she was making our bed. She crawled in between the folded sections and her eyes invited me closer. Not that I needed much encouraging, but that look was worth delaying things for another moment.

Climbing into bed – or a bed-like facsimile – with Bella Swan was worth anything and everything it took to get to this point. For once we weren't worried about being caught, we were worried about every passing second taking us one second closer to the weekend ending.

* * *

I was surprised we'd gotten any sleep, but as it turns out a day full of driving, drama, and exorcising demons out of Rosalie was enough to make sleep less of a luxury and more of a necessity.

Bella slept for a while after my eyes first blinked open and, although I wouldn't have admitted it to anyone with xy chromosomes, I tried to memorize every detail of this moment in case life never granted me this much happiness again. The air was crisp, smelling of sunshine in the way that early morning sun tends to do. I could smell faint traces of her perfume and could feel the warmth of her body against me. Her breath, sweeping across my neck with each exhalation, was what really sent me over the edge; other details I could dream up, but the warm wet breaths were something that could only be based firmly in reality.

I couldn't see her face, tucked into my shoulder, so I didn't know she was awake until her voice broke into my train of thought. "Hey."

I didn't want her to move, instead opting to turn my head just enough to place a soft kiss on her forehead. "Hey." The giggle from beneath me caught me off guard. "What are you laughing at?"

"Us," she lifted her head until our eyes were able to finally meet, "you'd think we have more to say to one another by now."

It was true; we always had the generic conversation starter before we could delve into anything of substance.

I was thinking it, but saying it out loud wasn't in the plan until it happened: "Oh, I've got plenty of things to say to you Miss Swan, but only about half of them are appropriate to say in front of children."

It was obvious I'd confused her, but I'd pretty much predicted that would be her response. I aimed a thumb in the direction of the window several yards across the courtyard containing three small children, faces pressed up against the glass, watching us like a zoo exhibit. I kept my eyes on her face, watching the confusion melt into a sweet smile. She lifted a hand to wave at them and all three darted through the heavy curtains to disappear. Turning back to me, she spoke in that slightly-deepened tone that always drove me wild, "You think you'll be sharing any of those inappropriate thoughts with me any time soon?"

When she asked these kinds of questions, the brutally honest kind, it always put me on the spot allowing me to run the risk of saying something completely embarrassing. Rather than let myself talk without the comfort of rational thinking, I kept it short: "Maybe."

I pulled her mouth to mine for a slow kiss, which seemed to function like charging a battery. By the time she tugged her soft lips away I was energized and wide awake. Maybe a little too awake for whatever time it was. Apparently being on the roof was like camping – with only the sights and sounds of nature to indicate time of day.

The soft sound of a chuckle escaping her lips caught my attention and I couldn't help lifting an eyebrow in her direction. I followed her eyes as they darted sharply to one side, "Our audience is back." The three children stood giggling once again in the large picture window.

Lifting her up off the ground by the hand, we stood and I gathered our things. "I guess that's our cue to return to reality."

Her sigh was cute, feigning defeat. "Yeah, I guess so – either that or we give these kids the education of a lifetime." I knew it was a bluff, but a damn good one. _I like the way your mind works Bella Swan_.

It was a relief to see that Emmett and Rosalie were already gone by the time we climbed down into the room. According to a text message they'd gone to visit some friends of Rose's on one of the local campuses. I'd have thought it strange for them to be out and about so early if my phone hadn't indicated we'd slept in. Ok, maybe slept in was an understatement and missed-the-entire- morning was more fitting – but the beauty of a parent-free weekend was that it didn't matter.

The bed closest the front door was a crumpled mess, but luckily the other had been untouched. Otherwise I wouldn't let Bella sit on either, much less lay on the potentially covered-in-sweat-if-not-more sheets.

"I think I'm gonna take a shower."

On any other occasion it would have just been another statement by another person about personal hygiene; however when Bella and I said it simultaneously it came across as an awkward invitation. I watched as she began to blush from deep within her cheeks, up through the sides of her face and smiled. "Why don't you go ahead?"

She nodded and went to grab her stuff from the bag in the closet. "Thanks. I'd argue with you, but I think I need it more than you do."

She was, of course, crazy. She looked beautiful as always, but now that I knew she had a secret confident, sexy side the moments of insecurity became cute reminders of the timid person she sometimes showed the rest of the world.

"I'll be out in a few minutes." She disappeared into the bathroom on the other side of the room, and as the door closed I could see the shadows of where she stood in the gap beneath the door. I mentally chastised myself for even looking, it was, after all, pretty desperate and recently I was fairly certain that our relationship had progressed at least somewhat beyond the desperation stage. In fact, I was just about to look away when the shadows beneath the door showed what I could only imagine was Bella stepping out of her clothes. While I knew this was a key element to showering, I hadn't really considered that she'd be totally naked until I suddenly had the evidence to support it.

I wondered how she'd react if I casually snuck into the bathroom once she was behind the shower curtain, sliding into the steamy shower behind her… I let my imagination take over which entertained me until I heard the water shut off on the other side of the door.

"Uh, Edward," her voice was timid and unsure.

Quickly walking to the door I wondered what kind of bathroom emergency she could be having that warranted anything from me. "Bel? Everything ok?"

"Yeah, uh, everything's fine. I just have a," she paused for an extra second, "problem."

I was glad she couldn't see the wide grin working its way across my lips. It was obvious whatever it was wasn't life-threatening – merely awkward. "You know, as wonderfully astute as I am – you'll actually have to tell me what that problem is for me to help you."

"Can you open the door for a second?" If her voice had been in that deep-toned sultry sound I would have considered this an act of seduction, but in her current frazzled state I knew not to even go there.

Cracking the door allowed for the thick cloud of steam to escape. Bella wasn't within sight, which meant she was probably hiding behind the shower curtain. Just as I thought it, her head peeked from behind the bland beige curtain with a look of desperation.

"Someone seems to have misplaced all the towels." Looking around proved her to be completely right; there wasn't so much as a lonely washcloth for the poor girl. I shifted my glance back to her and really processed that less than three feet away was my beautiful, sexy girlfriend in the shower. I mean, I'm not insensitive – I fully understood that she asked me in for my assistance, but this was the closest I'd ever been to seeing her body and I'd have been lying if I said it didn't excite me. Her eyes were bright, fresh looking, her smooth skin allowing the beads of water to slide along it, down the sides of her neck, disappearing behind the shower curtain.

I wanted to say something ambiguous, some kind of innuendo, or maybe even something damn obvious like out of a really bad porno movie: _Why even bother drying off? Give me the chance and I'll have you wet again in no time… _But I was also smart enough to know that I was a fucking big talker and I'd probably shrivel up and die before words like that ever crossed my lips.

"I'll get you something, just hang on." Damn me for being a nice guy, a slave to my conscience, although if I wasn't I probably wouldn't have been able to swing a girl like this to begin with.

Stepping back into the room revealed a large pile of clearly-used towels. Since Emmett was definitely not the type to wipe out enough towels for six adults, I assumed Rosalie used a separate towel for each strand of hair or some equally as inconsiderate bullshit. If she ever put the needs of someone else first, or hell, even considered the needs of someone else, I'd probably drop dead of shock.

The maid's cart couldn't be seen in either direction down the hallway, so I knocked on the door across the hall hoping Alice was still here. If nothing, she was a good sharer and would give up a few towels for her best friend. With my sister I was usually prepared for anything, but perhaps I'd never fully anticipated what "anything" could be until now. Jasper, slowly opening the door into the room still darkened by the drawn drapes, and stood wrapped only in bedsheets as he rubbed his eyes. I didn't have to intentionally look for her to find Alice, obviously sleeping off a night of activity.

"Shit."

"Fuck, Cullen. I'm sorry man. I didn't expect you – "

"No, it's my own fucking fault. I should have known better." It was true, I'm not naïve enough to think that spending the night together wouldn't lead to something between them - I just really, really didn't need a fucking mental image to coordinate with those thoughts. "Your sister and my brother used every towel in the room, we need a few, ok?"

Fuck Jasper. It was so hard to get, let alone, stay mad at him since he always knew just when to speak and when staying quiet was the best decision. In this instance he said nothing, retrieved a stack of towels, and handed them over.

"Thanks." I might have been talking to him, but I'd already headed back to our room – no need to see any more than was absolutely necessary.

I momentarily imagined Bella shivering in the shower and hustled a bit – opening the bathroom door in one quick movement. What I hadn't expected was walking in to see the version of Bella fresh from my dreams standing before me, glistening, and revealing her soft body in all its glory.

"Edward!" This was probably the only time I was unhappy hearing her say my name. In retrospect, a gentlemanly diversion of my eyes would have been the right behavior for the moment, but that's assuming I was thinking with my head. The one with the brain anyway. Instead I gawked at her, eyes wide and white, until she called my name a second time.

"Edward! A little privacy?"

I was pretty sure it wasn't really about the nudity, or having me see her in perhaps her most vulnerable state yet, but the surprise of it all. "I'm so sorry!" _Fuck!_

I was sorry that I embarrassed her and sorry for forcing her to expose herself before she intended to, but I wasn't at all sorry for confirming that every fantasy I had paled in comparison to the real thing. And it hadn't slipped my mind that at the moment I saw her she wasn't even trying.

When the door opened, I expected her to come out fully dressed. Instead, she stood in the doorway securely wrapped in a fluffy white towel. "I'm sorry I yelled at you."

"Bella, you're ridiculous. You had to do _something_ to snap me back to reality." I was cautious not to elaborate in case I started to embarrass her. Lucky for me, she laughed.

"Yeah, true. You were kinda starting to drool." As the smile spread across her face, I knew she wasn't upset – but I couldn't stop staring at the towel. _Fuck me. _I guess this is what she's been going through all the time. _Although I can't imagine almost seeing me right from the shower was half as interesting as this was… _

Her hand was absentmindedly playing with the bottom edge of the towel, occasionally lifting it up slightly to reveal a glistening upper thigh. When I was finally able to tear my eyes from her leg, her deep brown eyes were waiting for me – a playful expression dancing through them. Shit, maybe this girl knew _exactly _what she was doing after all.

Either because I'm a nice guy or a glutton for punishment, I ushered her back towards the bathroom. "You've got three minutes before I barge in all over again." Truthfully, I needed a good long shower before I'd let the woman anywhere near me again, and remembering that with her barely dressed in front of me was becoming harder and harder. Pun absolutely intended.

I'd given her three minutes but, she was back in just under two, dressed in jeans and a lightweight sweater, carefully towel-drying her hair. "You're up."

A shower – a _cool_ shower – was exactly what I needed. After all, I had a big show tonight and can't be so fixated on sex that my playing would suffer. Although at that exact point in time I'd have sacrificed every ounce of musical talent, and probably my soul, to be able to love that girl the way I wanted to.

I stayed in a few minutes longer than was necessary and quickly dried off and got dressed so she wouldn't be imagining anything weird going on. Or maybe girls didn't think like that, maybe it was just me.

I suggested leaving the hotel and exploring the area. Really I wanted to get away from anything that would remind me of Alice and Jasper. Yeah, I know – when it comes to Alice I tended to be the pot phoning the kettle to tell her it's black. Usually I was able to justify the double standard as something big-brotherly, but this time I was almost entirely sure that I was just bitter over the fact they were actually doing it and anything that reminded me of this fact seemed to make things worse.

We split a sandwich at a small café before drinking black coffee in a shop adjacent to one of the nearby campuses. "You know," I wasn't really a big "planner," but this time I couldn't help it, "this could be us away at college in a couple of years."

She smiled, but it seemed polite rather than anticipatory. "We could all be living on the moon in a couple of years." Now what's a guy supposed to say to that?

And of course, rather than let me inquire the universe throws me a curveball in the form of Alice and Jasper's smug faces walking by the window. Bella was waving to Alice, signaling them in, before I could make up a reason not to want them. I didn't really want to advertise that I hated them for having potentially wild sex in one room, while my testosterone fueled brother had potentially wild sex in the other room, and I was up on the roof content with thinking about it. To be fair, I'd never want to push her and I'd wait as long as was necessary; it was just easier to wait when I knew there were others waiting too.

I stayed quiet as Bella and Alice fell easily into noisy conversation, making up for their near silence the day before. Jasper sipped an energy drink from the can, his arm draped around Alice's shoulders. I was fixating on everything at this point and it hadn't even dawned on me that it might be nerves. Maybe it wasn't really about sex, about sisters, or about vague moon comments – maybe I was scared that tonight was a test. And the outcome of said test would be the sole determining factor for my entire future.

Of course, it was just a theory.

* * *

BPOV

So it had happened. He saw me naked, completely and utterly naked, and it wasn't at all what I imagined. I'd thought for starters the lighting would be dim rather than the awkward florescence that seems to shine a spotlight on every possible skin imperfection. But despite the imperfections, the look on his face clearly demonstrated something beyond satisfaction. Just another reason I loved him.

I could feel his arm tense as Alice and Jasper walked in to sit with us – but I didn't know why. Normally something like that would bug me, but I was just so anxious for things to be back to normal with my best friend.

She fell into the overstuffed couch to my left, Jasper sliding beside her. "Hey!" Her small arms tightened around my neck in a close embrace. "I feel like I haven't seen your face in years." We fell easily into conversation and if I didn't keep reminding myself I'd probably have forgotten that we even had drama yesterday.

Although she kept talking, I could tell she was listening to Jasper as he talked to Edward behind her back. When he mentioned that they should bring over the equipment this afternoon and do a sound check her eyes grew wide. It might have been my imagination, but it seemed as if she was willing them to go; using her mental powers to usher them out.

Not that I attributed it specifically to her, but when she opened her eyes from her silent pleading they both rose to stand. "Sorry, it seems we have something to attend to." Edward's voice was borderline emotionless.

"Gotta make sure the roadies don't damage anything while they're unpacking our stuff." Jasper's voice was smooth and cool. Something was _definitely_ up.

Edward bent forward to crush his lips against mine, much deeper than he normally would have in the middle of a public place. "I love you, see you later, ok?"

I could only nod as he left behind Jasper, feeling my wheels turning to try and decode his behavior. It was the frantic wave of a hand in front of my face that made me realize I'd zoned out for longer than I expected.

"Bella? Bella!" Her hand now snapping a finger as I blinked a few times, "I need you to focus! I _have_ to talk to you!"

Waving an arm to push her hand from my face I shifted to sit upright and attentive. "Please tell me there isn't something wrong – I don't think I can handle any more drama this weekend."

"No, no, no. Nothing bad. Just something… big." As the words left her mouth she covered it quickly with a small hand, appearing to stifle laughter.

"You're killing me, Alice. And you know it, don't you?"

She tilted her head to one side before scrunching up her nose and nodding in my direction. I couldn't help smiling back at her. "Bella, I slept with Jasper last night."

I had heard her. I heard and processed each word, but I still couldn't help but ask, "Wait? What do you mean?"

Her posture changed and she bent forward, resting her elbows on her drawn-together knees. She lowered her voice to just above a whisper. "We were alone last night, lying in bed watching a movie and it just kind of… happened. I know that sounds just _so_ lame –"

"No, Al, it's not lame at all. You love him, right?" I followed that great advice of never asking a question I didn't already know the answer to in this instance.

"I do, you know I do. I mean I didn't have it planned out or anything and I don't think he did either. It just felt right."

Her spontaneity in the whole matter was a bit surprising since she normally had a plan for everything from sneezes to blinking. "Maybe the best things can't be planned Al. Maybe that's what makes it special." I felt like part of an after-school special, but hopefully minus the pregnancy scare.

"You know, Rosalie told me her first time, before she started dating Emmett, totally sucked. She said it was painful and over before she knew it and that she was pretty much just glad to have the whole thing over with. And as sad as it sounds, despite the high hopes I had for that whole 'perfect experience' thing, it was Rosalie's words that stuck with me; _that_ was what I was expecting. But it was kind of great in its own way. We were comfortable and very open and I'd be lying if I said it wasn't the closest I've ever felt to someone in my life."

Her honesty was heartbreaking in a way I couldn't describe. I didn't have a lot of friends back in Phoenix, none as close as Alice, and this was my first time hearing of actual, experienced sex first hand. Every word seemed to be reeling me into her experience. "Al, would you do it all over again?"

She smiled widely at sat back, appearing a little more at ease. "Totally. Hell, depending on sleeping arrangements I'm hoping to do it all over again tonight!"

I covered my own mouth this time to refrain from belly laughing in a way that might disrupt the entire place. "Sometimes you go just one step too far with the information. But you know that too, don't you?"

Again she nodded, this time with a bit of extra enthusiasm. "There's just one tiny little problem you might need to know about."

I could tell my face dropped as she completed her sentence. Whatever she was about to tell me was most likely the reason behind Edward's odd behavior earlier today. "Bella, Edward knows. He came by looking for towels this morning and connected the dots pretty quickly."

_Shit_. So based on this information he wasn't actually angry or disgusted by the fact that his friend had deflowered his sister on a group trip. He was…frustrated. Frustrated perhaps by the fact that we were the only couple on this trip who couldn't write a letter to _Penthouse Forum_ about our nocturnal activities. Although he'd never push me into things before I was ready, I knew he was waiting for me to give him the green light at any time.

"That explains the mood I guess." I wanted to talk to her about the things I'd been feeling, the urges I'd been having, the feeling in the pit of my stomach that made me think I was closer to being ready than not, but I was worried that I'd be crossing the line between friend and friend dating her brother. "Is this something we can talk about? You and me I mean. Does it, like, gross you out?" This was a question I honestly didn't know the answer to.

"You can talk to me about anything, Bella. I mean it. I just don't need to see any anatomically correct drawings or home movies, ok? Now something like _that_ could seriously scar a sister for life." Gotta hand it to her, she takes it all in stride.

"No polaroids, got it." She stuck out her tongue so quickly I almost thought I'd imagined it. "I just worry that I'll be ready and won't even know it."

"You'll know." Her small hand rested on my arm as she met my gaze with her own. "And even though I'm the first one to admit that I'm no expert, I have one piece of advice for you: don't expect perfection. Someone once told me that if you wait for things to be perfect, you'll wait forever. In my opinion, when you're ready and it happens you'll end up with a whole new definition of perfection."

"Wow, Alice – that was pretty brilliant."

Her chuckles were infectious. "Haven't you figured out? I'm actually quite brilliant – the rest is just an act." _I freaking love this girl! _

She jumped up looking at her watch. "So we have exactly three hours before we have to leave for the club. That should be just about enough time to make us gorgeous."

"Alice, I don't know what you have in mind – but I'm all set for tonight."

"You're ridiculous Bella Swan, completely ridiculous." _God, they could be so alike sometimes…_ "We're buying new outfits and getting blow outs or Rosalie will put us both to shame, I promise you that." Even thought we'd gotten through our conflict for the most part, saying the "R" word was pretty much all it took to get me to agree.

I let Alice dress me up for about an hour and a half – forcing me in and out of outfits I would never ordinarily pick out. After buying me a way-too-tight top she described as "putting the twins front and center," we headed to a modern-style salon. Alice had called for us earlier this morning and I wasn't sure how to feel about the fact that she'd anticipated I'd need a complete makeover to fit in tonight. Truthfully, she was just looking out for me – seemed to be a common Cullen trait.

While Alice gave specific instructions on how she wanted her hair done, I relied on a less-is-more approach; tame was about the best I could hope for. The woman working on my hair was able to work miracles and I was actually excited to go out into the world confident that at least one thing about me would be put together for tonight.

During our walk back to the hotel, we slipped into conversations about everything and nothing the way things usually were. Jasper's car was in the lot so we knew the guys were back, but it was Alice's idea to keep ourselves hidden until it was time to leave for the show. According to her, it was the only way to make an impression.

We holed ourselves up in the room that had been Alice and Jasper's, and the guys didn't put up a fight under the condition that we take Rosalie with us. Apparently, she'd been driving the three of them crazy since they returned from their rehearsal.

Alice drew an invisible line down the middle of the bathroom mirror and gave Rosalie clear boundaries as to where she was allowed to get ready: "No one's usurped territory like you since Napoleon."

About an hour into the whole "getting ready" charade I started to get cold feet. "Alice, remind me why we're doing this. The boys know what we look like, for better or for worse."

"Trust me, it'll be worth it. It's gonna be an ego boost – for us and for them."

Rosalie's voice seemed to float from the bathroom as her reflection displayed her meticulously lining her eyes. "Well, I can tell you that I do it because I've got a reputation to live up to."

"Painted up and cheap isn't exactly the kind of reputation all of us want." Alice's sarcasm seemed to come with her newly sexed up persona – I liked this extra-spunky side of her. She turned back to me, "We'll get a boost after seeing the guys drool over us from up on the stage and they'll get a boost knowing we did a little fancying up for them. It's win-win!"

It did _sound_ good, so I sucked it up and went to work with a dark brown eyeliner pencil. I squeezed myself into the tight, dark blue top showing a nice bit of cleavage and the silhouette of every curve. I felt like I was trying too hard, but Rosalie's skimpy halter dress reminded me what trying too hard actually looked like. Alice passed me over a lip gloss and forced me into a pair of heels that she'd brought.

"Al, I was just gonna wear my boots." The comfortable pair of brown boots was what I'd wear to any other social function.

"You need something with a little height – trust me; it helps to lift your butt into the cute little ass you normally hide." She was so difficult to argue with since the idea of enhancing my butt was appealing in its own way.

Rosalie drove us there in Jasper's truck since the guys had to be there early. She drove like a maniac, but we had to hand it to her – she talked the valet from the restaurant next door into parking the car even though we weren't eating there. Ok, maybe it wasn't really talking, just a good look at her long slender legs and a pouty expression on her undeniably beautiful face. I guess she was good for something after all…

The bar was dark and mostly occupied by large wooden bar and several plain sets of wooden tables and chairs. The seating was almost entirely filled with college-age people all taking advantage of the fifty-cent pitchers until ten that night. It was a relief that no one asked for ID when we walked in since, if asked my age, I'd crack immediately under the pressure.

The guys must have been backstage since they were nowhere in sight, and although I wasn't a huge drinker myself, I'd hoped someone gave Edward a drink or two to calm him down. I'd been worried that his frustrations from earlier would cloud his mind and if he didn't play up to his own personal standard tonight we'd all be hearing about it forever.

Our timing had been perfect since a balding man probably in his mid 40's came out on the stage to announce the band. Truthfully, almost no one even glanced up at the stage – but to the boys this was a headlining job and nothing could diminish what a big step that was for them.

Jasper was first to speak, introducing themselves again: "Uh, we're Tragic Turn and if luck is on our side we're gonna keep you entertained tonight. So order yourselves another pitcher, sit back, and let's have a good night, ok?"

Alice couldn't help grinning as he spoke, and it was adorable in his own, charming way. But at the same time I couldn't stop staring at Edward, looking for signs of how he was doing. He actually seemed very relaxed and had changed into the pair of jeans I loved on him most. They rested at just the right point of his hips, exposing his sexy abdomen if he shifted or lifted his arms. His grey t-shirt reminded me immediately of the first day I met him, both of us out in the rain. I remembered how it clung to him as the rain soaked in and how I couldn't tear my eyes away from the droplets as they worked down his face and neck. I seemed to look at that boy for the first time every time and each time he still gave me butterflies.

Alice saw a group getting up from a table near the stage and we snatched it up before they were even out of their seats. It might have been an important night for the guys, but it was a big night for us too. They opened their set with a few cliché crowd pleasers, but we all knew this was strategy more than anything. They'd always said that people pay more attention when you entice them in with something familiar.

The three of us clapped and hooted after each song, standing out from the gentle applause scattered throughout the rest of the bar, but the guys gave little indication they even knew we were there. It bordered on disappointment, especially after the effort we'd put into getting ready. Alice was reassuring though, "They're nervous. Once they see us they'll be distracted all night anyway." Gotta love her.

I noticed a few people around us getting into it when they played "The Joker," and I think Jasper put a little extra emphasis on the line, _I really love your peaches, wanna shake your tree_, specifically for Alice's benefit.

Watching Edward's fingers as he slid them up and down the neck of the guitar had always been mesmerizing, but now that I was beginning to understand the full potential of those hands it was an entirely new experience. He tickled Opal gently with the tips of his fingers and I felt a warming sensation run through my body like hot water through a pipe. My man was talented, sexy, and mine. And on top of all of that he wanted me. Wanted me regardless of how plain I could be, wanted me for the person I am, and wanted me for everything I'm not. I began to suspect that "ready" was a state of mind I was more familiar with than I realized.

And just as the thought crossed my mind, I heard Edward's voice – deep and breathy – coming through the speakers. "I, uh, picked this song because I wanted to dedicate it to someone who couldn't be here tonight. But since the stars aligned and she's here I'll play it anyway and hope she likes it."

From the second he started strumming I knew what it was. And it was ironic that, despite all the conversations we'd had in our months together, I'd never told him how much I loved this song. It was _that_ song for me; the one that makes you smile and cry simultaneously. The one that makes you believe in things that seem so difficult to believe in. Hearing Edward's voice begin to sing the lyrics just sent me reeling.

_So, so you think you can tell  
__Heaven from hell  
__Blue skies from pain…_

It's funny that he'd intended it to be for me when he thought I wouldn't be present to hear it, but as he sang it it took on a new meaning. I wished he were _here_, right here with me so I could pull his mouth to mine, rest a hand on his chest to feel his heart beating, and say to him, "I love you. I'll always love you."

When he got to the "wish you were here" part of the song, he sang with his eyes closed. I knew he did it when he was funneling all of his emotions into what he was doing – sending them out in each and every word.

_How I wish, how I wish you were here.  
We're just two lost souls  
Swimming in a fishbowl,  
Year after year,  
Running over the same old ground.  
What have we found  
The same old fears.  
Wish you were here._

I hoped he'd look to me, so I could silently indicate that this gesture meant the world to me. As if my thoughts were being broadcast throughout the bar, his eyes opened to immediately focus on mine.

Unlike the sexy, smoldering look he sometimes gave me during a show, this time he was looking into my eyes as if there was something to see. Although it seemed to defy logic, I understood it as I returned the gesture. And suddenly I got it: it wasn't about wishing I was here tonight, it was about wishing I'd be here always. _Edward, I'll be here as long as it makes you happy, as long as you want me here. _

When the song finished I was so overwhelmed with emotion that I quickly moved to the front door for some air. The whole trip had been surreal – albeit mixed good and bad surreal – but just when I thought the feelings I had for Edward couldn't be stronger or more intense he'd do something to shoot that theory out of the water.

After a few deep breaths of cool air I turned to walk back inside just as they were starting a new song. Edward was taking the lead and whether it had been pre-planned or whether he started playing on a whim, his timing was impeccable. The first few notes of "Foxy Lady" were unmistakable and could be heard as I stepped forward into the light. And while I probably could have helped the wide grin that had spread across my lips; the strut I was projecting just could _not_ be helped. It must have been a combination of the heels and the lift I knew they were giving my ass. Either way, I allowed my hair to bounce as I walked, catching the light, and making sure to show Edward that I knew he was doing this for me.

_You know youre a cute little heartbreaker  
Foxy  
You know youre a sweet little lovemaker  
Foxy__'t do you no harm, no  
You've got to be all mine, all mine  
Ooh, foxy lady_

I wanna take you home  
I won

I could see his smile, pulling up just slightly higher on one side, forming as he furiously played and had a feeling that once they were done for the night I'd only have time to blink before his lips were on me.

They broke after the first set for about twenty minutes and I was happy to see that Edward was the first of the three to head to our table. It must have been that the heels boosted my confidence along with my ass since the first words out of my mouth sounded nothing like me: "Hey, handsome. Can I have your autograph?"

He stopped in his tracks and smiled a thoughtfully mischievous smile. "You? You can have anything you want." _God! _It wasn't even what he said, but the way he said it. If he was a less trustworthy person I'd have been in big trouble. A cough from behind Edward seemed to break up the moment, both of us turning to look at its source. Emmett was nudging Edward with one shoulder. As he turned back to face me, Edward dramatically rolled his eyes – so very much like Alice – before speaking. "Oh, uh, Emmett wanted me to ask you if you're wearing space pants."

I wanted to laugh, probably so hard I'd pee myself, but I held it back enough to play dumb at the old joke – and a bad old joke at that. "Uh, space pants? No, why?"

Edward looked back at Emmett over his shoulder only to find his lame attempt at a subtle thumbs up before returning to look at me. "Cause your ass is out of this world." He could not have delivered the line more deadpan if he was forced to speak through one of those electronic voice boxes.

I feigned flattery at the comment for Emmett's sake and watched as he beamed from behind his brother. "Dude, now that's a line of genius if I do say so." I swear I saw a little wink follow the comment.

It was cute the way we all wanted to humor him – to protect his feelings. Despite his status as the biggest and strongest of us all, he had this sensitive streak we all suspected was there lying just beneath the surface. No one wanted to aggravate it unnecessarily; it would be like kicking a puppy.

The short break felt even shorter than I'd anticipated and it was time for them to go back on stage. I leaned back into the brick wall behind our table and quickly pulled Edward close to me. "You sang my song tonight, without even knowing it. You have no idea what a turn on that was." Damn these heels and their magic confidence…

He raised his arms and placed and his hands against the wall on either side of my head, leaning in close. "I was just gonna say the same thing about that shirt. That painted-on, cleavage baring thing is _so_ working for you right now. Or working for me is probably more accurate." The sexual tension was growing with each passing breath.

I leaned in close to kiss him, pausing just before my mouth made contact with his. "I think you're supposed to go back up there."

He pushed his mouth onto mine, letting his hands rest on my hips and pushing the weight of our bodies into the wall. "_Now_ I can go back up there." He did that sideways smile thing that drove me absolutely mad and leapt up onto the stage.

They played another long set, but I could barely process the songs. I was too wrapped up in watching Edward's every movement, especially those hands – those hands! – and letting my imagination get the best of me. I was positive things were wrapping up once they let Emmett sing a really strange attempt at "Casey Jones."

_Driving that train, high on cocaine,  
Casey Jones is ready, watch your speed.  
Trouble ahead, trouble behind,  
And you know that notion just crossed my mind._

We all screamed and clapped like crazy anyway and were fully pumped from the excitement of it all. The guys played like rock stars, which either made us the bitchy rock star wives or the slutty rock star groupies. Probably we were somewhere in between, with some of us falling more to one end of the spectrum or the other.

Edward was once again the first one to reach us and something electrifying began to surge through my veins. I pulled him off to the side, backing him up against the brick wall this time, "Do you think we could get out of here? Like now?"

His hands lifted from his sides to wind around my middle, pulling me to press up against him. "Why the hurry Ms. Swan? I don't know about you, but I've got a lot of energy to burn off."

I'd been shooting off my mouth all night, why stop now? "That's just it, Cullen. I've got a lot of," I didn't know just how to say it, "…_energy_ to burn off too."

"Bella – what do you –" I didn't let him finish his sentence before bringing my mouth to the crook of his neck and gently nibbling at it. I felt my hand slowly sliding into his front pocket before I realized I was even doing it.

"I think I'm ready, Edward. And we need to leave here, right now."

From deep within his pocket I could feel his reaction long before he said anything. It was like an out of body experience, my hand slowly creeping over within his pocket.

He pulled my hand out forcefully and lifted it up to his lips. I noticed his eyes still watching me, searching for a sign of some kind. I did the one thing I could think of and slowly licked my lips. His eyes followed as my tongue slid across both lips and then grabbed my hand. He leaned forward, pressing his lips against my ear as he spoke after swallowing hard: "Let's go."

* * *

**Author's Note: Is it just me, or does it seem to be one thing after another on this trip? Of course, as someone who lives a life full of drama herself it seems only natural… **

**Thanks for toughing out the last few weeks with me – thank you for being such loyal readers and for making me want to do the best for each of you. I've missed you all. **

**Other Songs:  
**"**The Joker" – Steve Miller Band  
**"**Foxy Lady" – Jimi Hendrix  
**"**Casey Jones" – Grateful Dead**

**Just a reminder, these and every other song mentioned in Tragic Turn can be found on my YouTube playlist, just search for "Tragic Turn." **

**xoxo L. **


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